Take a Bow
by Lilly Monroe
Summary: As her brother, he would do anything to protect her. As a friend, he would ultimately try to save her. Abused most of her life, lines would blur and turn twisted as she tried to escape her hell and protect her brothers. Was she willing to risk it all? AH.
1. City of Delusion

**~The idea for this story has been in my mind for months and I finally was able to gather the courage to write it out. That, and a few weeks ago, I stumbled about the story Dark Whispers by the amazing Oriana de la Rose and hot damn, my inspiration just about skyrocketed!! If you haven't read it, you MUST. It's a dark and deliciously sinful Jasper/Bella story. **

**Themes and events will be dark, depressing and maybe a bit twisted to some. At any rate, if you continue to read, then thank you so much! **

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**Chapter One: City of Delusion  
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_**Stay away from me  
Build a fortress  
And shield your beliefs  
Touch the divine  
As we fall in line**_

_**Can I believe  
When I don't trust  
All your theories  
Turn to dust  
I choose to hide  
From the All Seeing Eye**_

_Home._

Four simple letters that are supposed to describe a place that is filled with unconditional love, happiness, acceptance and above all, comfort. However, none of that seemed to exist in my world anymore; only faint glimmers of it every now and then.

It wasn't always like this; there was actually time when the word homedidn't strike fear throughout my body. Yes, such a time existed I just, don't remember what it was like. All I know is that my life these days is filled with terror, anxiety and I find myself walking on eggshells each and every moment.

These days, all it takes is one wrong glance or step and it'll unleash my stepfather's fury. My stepfather, a man who once was in the military, who had promised to give my mother everything but in reality, had taken all her happiness away.

Biologically, Esme Cullen is not my mother but she has filled that role in my life since I was five years old after my real mother, Esme's best friend, died in a car accident. She had took me in with no hesitation, bringing me into her family that already consisted of a husband and a son. Her son, Edward, became my best friend the day I moved in. He was the same age as I was and we instantly connected and we've been virtually inseparable since day one.

However, nothing in life can ever be perfect. After living with the Cullens for two years, Esme's husband Carlisle was diagnosed with cancer. He was such a wonderful man, Carlisle, always treating me like the daughter that he never had. At seven years old, Edward and I did not fully understand the concept of caner and death and yet, it was something we both experienced at such a young age. When we lost him, it affected Edward greatly. His father was his hero and mentor. I did all I could to help him get through his grief but, there was only so much that a little girl could do to help her brother when she herself was lost and confused.

A year and half later, a still grief stricken Esme met Thomas Whitlock while he was on a business trip. She was immediately taken by him. He was handsome, from the South and according to her, had an accent to 'die' over. They hit it off right away and before I knew it, he had completely swept her off her feet. She fell in love fast with him and when he asked her to marry him, she didn't think twice. So tired of being alone and sad, she saw Thomas as her salvation.

Little did she know that six months after they got married, he would soon become her hell.

We all moved to California, moving in with Thomas and his son, Jasper. Things were so great at first. Edward and I got along great with Jasper and he immediately became part of our little group. We were siblings, growing closer with each passing day. They didn't exclude me from anything but rather, made sure I was a part of everything.

But then, everything changed.

One small little thing set everything off and the pain hasn't stopped since.

We had been sitting around the kitchen table, father has asked us a question and no one answered him right away for we had no answer. He completely snapped standing and bringing his hand across my face. He held no remorse after he did, didn't apologize. Rather, he said that I deserved it for being incapable of answering him quickly. We were all shocked, minus Jasper. He confided in us that father had always been strict and had hit him a handful of times.

Though, after that night, things got worse, the slaps turned to beatings and the beatings sometimes turning into cruel punishments. Once, father made the three of us go three days without eating simply because our hands weren't clean enough when we sat down. Another time, he broke every plate at the table and then made me pick it all up by hand. My hands bled for hours, and it took forever to remove the shards of glass out.

At any rate, we have all been living like this for almost ten years now and they haven't gotten any better. It's been nearly a decade since father and mother got married and I don't think any of us will ever be able to escape this hell. I don't know if there is any part of father that loves us. Maybe he loves mother, he must. But the three of us, I find it hard to believe. How can you love someone and yet them hurt them on almost a daily basis? It seems impossible.

All I know is that each day is a blessing and a curse. A blessing because I survived another day; a curse because I know what my reality is and the future doesn't look too bright for any of us.

**OoOoOo**

Today had started like any other day. Like always, I was up by six, making sure father's breakfast was on the table by six thirty. He had the same thing every morning; coffee and eggs. They had to be perfect otherwise there'd be hell to pay.

"Do you know what today is dear Eliza?" father called me back to the table after I had served him. I hated it when he called me dear; it made my skin crawl. However, I didn't hesitate before answering him.

"It's Friday father, the end of the week." I answered him precisely.

"Yes, but what else?" I racked my brain quickly, trying to think of any important day. It wasn't anyone's birthday or holiday so I was coming up short.

"I'm sorry, I..I don't know father."

That was _always _the wrong answer, no matter how I phrased it.

"You incompetent little girl." Before I could register it, his hand had reached out, pinching my inner thigh roughly. I didn't scream however, just bit my lip tightly. If I screamed, it'd be so much worse. "You know that Friday nights, I take your mother out. Which means, you are to have dinner ready earlier as I will be coming home sooner and don't think for a second that I'll be left waiting."

What! That was nothing new; this was routine every Friday, I didn't need reminding. It had been a trick, I knew it. Father was always looking for an excuse to inflict pain. It was like he got some sort of sick pleasure out of it.

"Now go Eliza" his hand lingered on my thigh, moving it up and down briefly "Get out." He moved it away, going right back to his breakfast. I nodded my head quickly, making my way upstairs to start getting ready for school. Standing in the shower, I couldn't shake the feeling of disgust that creeped all along my skin. Every time father put his hand on me, it made me want to cringe and die. Though he was not my real father, he was he only father figure I had and for him to touch me that way, I didn't like it. I knew that was the reason why he only allowed me to sleep in these silk shorts and either tank tops or t-shirts. He _enjoyed _seeing me dressed that way in the morning, I just knew it. However, I wasn't brave enough to wear anything else. Only when he was off on business trips could I wear my sweats and ratty shirts. Oh, how I loved those few days when he was gone; we all did in fact. We were all so much happier when he was gone. Countless times, I had thought about what would happen if we all ran away but that fantasy quickly faded away. Father had powerful connections and no matter where we went to, he would surely find us.

By the time I was done showering, it was seven, giving me exactly thirty minutes to get dressed, attempt to cover up the bruise that was still a bit fresh from where father hit me Monday night after I hesitated too long in answering his question.

I was standing in front of my mirror in just a long sleeve shirt and some boy shorts when there was a knock at the door. Knowing that mother was already gone, I knew it had to be one of my brothers.

"Come in" I didn't bother looking when the door opened.

No words were spoken for a few moments, until I felt someone breathing against my ear, their chest pressed against my back slightly.

"Liz" my brother, Edward, sighed, running his fingers down the side of my neck, over the bruise I was trying to cover up with some concealer. I gave him a small smile, looking at him from the reflection in my mirror.

"It's not that bad, Edward." I turned, touching his cheek gently. "And you know it."

"I know but" he stopped when his eyes dropped lower, eyes landing on my still bare legs. "Liz" his voice was suddenly softer, strained. "What, how?" he dropped, crouching down so that he was eye level with the bruise that was forming on the inside of my thigh. His cool finger touched it gently and I winced, it still being so fresh.

"He tricked me again with his stupid questions." I sighed, my eyes sliding shut for the briefest of moments as he continued to touch me. Though he was my brother, I couldn't help but feel something a bit odd when his hand moved a bit higher, dangerously close to where no one had ever touched me before. I wondered for a second what it would be like to be touched there.

"Edward" I sighed "we need to get going."

"How dare he touch you there?" He stood, wrapping his arms around me tightly, burying my face in his chest. I did not cry however, knowing tears would be a waste of time. This was nothing compared to the other things father had done to me. "How dare he?" he whispered and when I looked up, I frowned when I saw his eyes glistening slightly.

"Shh, Edward we can't go upset, not right now. We have to get to school. You know what happened last time we were all late to school." I saw fear in Edward's eyes as he thought about that day last year, when the three of us had been five minutes late to school. Not only had father hit each of us but, he had hit us with dishes, flinging plates at us with impeccable aim. He had hit Edward in the back of his head, causing him to have to get stitches. "We must be strong." I wiped a tear that had slid down his cheek "we have to."

He nodded slowly, lowering his head to press his lips against my forehead "I love you Liz." After that, he left me to finish getting dressed. It didn't take me long, ten minutes tops before I was heading downstairs where my brothers were waiting for me. It was easier for them, hiding any physical remnant of father's abuse. And even if someone saw them, they would be easier believed if they said they had been playing a sport or got into a fight with some other guy. Me on the other hand? I had to be so cautious, especially during PE when we had to change in front of everybody. One too many times had girls caught glimpses of cuts and bruises. And, one can only explain and lie so many times before people stop believing you. Granted, while I may be rather clumsy, how many times can you say you tripped and fell down some stairs before they realize you're lying?

Edward and Jasper was standing in the living room silently when I came down, bag slung over my shoulder. Their silence told me that Edward had already told Jasper about the bruise on my leg. Edward and Jasper were extremely different when it came to certain things. For one, Jasper was father's biological son so he didn't endure the abuse as much as I did but he still got it either way. And unlike Edward, Jasper did not cry or get as emotional. No, he would just look at me with anger burning in his blue eyes every time father hit me. He'd look with anger along with fear because he knew there was nothing he could do about it. Though different, both of them had been my protectors since we were younger and I loved them dearly for it.

For nine years, we have stuck together through thick and thin. We were all each other had.

Jasper came up to me, both hands on my face before pressing those full lips against my cheek for a brief moment. When he pulled away, he nodded, his eyes asking the unspoken question if I was okay. Of course, none of us were okay but he was more so asking if I was okay to make it through the day. I nodded back at him before he turned and headed out the door, Edward and I following him. Edward handed me two pills, a bottle of water and a granola bar as we walked outside, the chill hitting me as we did. It was mid February and the wind was cutting through me like a knife. I shivered as I got into the backseat, both my brothers frowning in disapproval as they saw me. The thin jacket I was wearing was no match for this weather. But, I knew that unless father changed his mind, he wouldn't be paying for me to get any new clothes anytime soon. Father was very peculiar in how I dressed. I was never allowed to be too exposed but when the time would come for some big event, he made sure that we were all dressed to the nines; for appearance sake of course, making it seem as though we were the perfect family.

My mother, bless her, couldn't buy me things even she wanted to. All her money came from father and that man kept close tabs on all the money she spent and what she bought; even groceries. Though he had plenty of it, he still made sure he was control of it all. Once in awhile, he would give us children money for who knows what but, we never spent it. Why would we? Knowing father, he would take whatever it was away from us.

We got to school with ten minutes to spare so there was no time to talk, just hurrying off in different directions. As hard as I tried to pay attention in my first few classes, my mind kept drifting back to this morning. Not so much about what father had done to me but rather, the way my brothers had reacted and done.

When Edward and Jasper touched me, I felt two very different emotions. With Edward, it was comforting but with Jasper, when his hands touched me and lips were against my skin, something inside of me yearned for him to give me more, to touch me again. His hands, though a bit rough were like heaven against my skin.

I have never had a boyfriend, thanks to Father, so I didn't quite understand some things. Like for example, why when either of them touched me, why did I suddenly feel funny on the inside? It wasn't highly unpleasant to say the least; I just didn't know what it was. Though, I'm pretty sure whatever it was, I wasn't supposed to be feeling these things with my brothers. Though we were not actually related, I lived with them, thought of them as brothers and yet, their hands were starting to send my body into hormonal overdrive it seemed.

Though I had to admit, I'd feel this more with Jasper than with Edward. I think I knew why though. Edward, when we were about thirteen, confided in me that he was bisexual. Though he enjoys the opposite sex, it seems as though he leans towards men than he does girls. Which, there is nothing wrong with that in my book. Edward is Edward, and I don't think any less of him. The only problem was that, when father found out, he practically forbid Edward from ever being romantically involved with another man, telling him that he was only to be with women and that was that. Edward was crushed but knew better than to try and defy father.

And then there was Jasper; my brother who had a few girlfriends here and there but had never really been serious about anyone. In my eyes, he was perfection. Though usually stoic and serious, there was a side of Jasper that not many people saw. There was a part of him that was fun and carefree; a side that I had only seen a handful of times. I couldn't blame him. We didn't exactly have the easiest life and there wasn't usually much room for smiles and laughter. My heart ached for both my brothers so much.

I was extremely tired by the time lunch arrived that I could hardly keep my eyes open as I stood in line, waiting to get food along with the rest of the school. I spotted Edward at our table, always the first one there. After paying for my things, I joined him, setting my tray in the middle; it was routine and tradition. Being as father didn't give us much money, we had to make do with what he gave us. No one ever said anything about the Whitlock/Cullen kids sharing a tray of cafeteria food. I'm sure they thought it was weird but that was the least of our problems in all honesty.

Edward and I talked quietly as we waited for Jasper to join us. He always came in a few minutes later, being as his class was further away than ours were. When he finally did walk in, I felt something odd in my body as I saw him talking with some girl, who was laughing at whatever he told him. My eyes narrowed as I watched them walk, before splitting off as she went to her friends and he came sauntering to our table. Edward looked at me confused and I just shrugged. Jasper sat on the other side of me, across from Edward, completing our half circle. He was about to reach across to grab something from the tray but he quickly pulled his hand back, staring at Edward before looking at me, as if something had just dawned on him.

"Liz" Jasper leaned in closer to the table "Edward and I were talking…"

Oh, no. That was never a good sign. When those two got to talking, especially about me, it was never good.

"Jasper and I are concerned about you, Liz. You've lost a lot of weight again and it's not good for you."

I scoffed. They had no idea. "Liz, we know why you don't eat as much." Jasper glared at me, his eyes going right through me. Okay, so I guess they did know.

"You guys don't understand." I whispered lowly, so no one could hear me "the pressure, you know what will happen."

"Bullshit." Jasper snapped "your health is more important Liz."

I shook my head. They honestly couldn't understand. When I said that father was peculiar over how I dressed, the same went for physical appearance as well. It was crucial that mother and I gained no weight what so ever. And believe me, he would know if we did. Once, I gained five pounds and he forced me to go on a diet until I lost fifteen. And when I wasn't losing it fast enough, he'd hit me and then proceed to make me lose more.

"You're bruising more easily Liz." Edward pointed out "and it's because you don't have enough strength or weight on you to handle everything. What if someone sees?"

He was right. God, no matter what I did, it was always a lose-lose situation. This didn't just have to do with me, this affected all of us. I just nodded, not wanting to talk about it anymore.

"Here, you eat this" Jasper pushed the sandwich that was on the tray towards me. I immediately felt guilty. It was supposed to be for them, not me. I was supposed to eat the fruit and whatever else I had thrown on there.

"Just eat it, Liz. We'll be fine." He pushed it closer to me and this time, my stomach couldn't resist. I ate that sandwich in earnest, savoring every bite.

A comfortable conversation fell upon us as we talked about all kinds of things, eating all the food from the tray. I wasn't feeling a whole lot better when lunch was over but, I knew there was only one more class to get through and then I'd be free for the weekend. Even better, my next class was science and I had it with Jasper. Science wasn't my best subject by any means but Jasper always helped me. And I needed all the help I could get.

As we took our seats at our lab table, I noticed that the same girl from the cafeteria was staring at Jasper, waving to him as we sat down. That's where I had seen her before! She was one of the more popular students with her beautiful brown hair and seemingly perfect body. She and Jasper would make a fine looking couple but, only on the outside. That pretty girl would never be able to handle our real lives.

"Friend of yours?" I looked over at my brother and he just brushed it off like nothing.

"She's been after me for the past three weeks." He mumbled lowly so I could only hear him "I don't have the heart to tell her to back the fuck off."

That earned a small laugh from me "Why? She's very pretty Jasper."

"She's not my type." He stated simply.

"No one's ever your type." He looked at me, as if he wanted to respond to that but instead he kept his mouth shut. I didn't have the time to ask him about it because our teacher walked in, my eyes immediately landing on the stack of papers in her hand. I could feel my hands getting a bit sweaty. I knew those were our tests from last week. The test that I had studied so hard for but still found it extremely difficult when I took it.

"I will just put your minds to rest and hand these back right now." She smiled at us "some of you did exceptionally well while a few of you may need to come see me after class." She began handing them back, different expressions coming from people. When she reached Jasper and I's table, she gave him his first, giving him a knowing smile before turning to me.

"Better Miss Cullen." She handed it to me and for a second, I was terrified to look down at the grade. Looking at it, I felt like I was going to be sick. There, highlighted in read was the number seventy nine. Which, meant I had gotten a C+ on the test. Quickly putting the paper down, I glanced over at Jasper, who had a bright ninety four percent staring back at me.

"Jasper" I slid him the test so he could see. His eyes locked with mine quickly, fear and sympathy filling them. He knew what this meant also. You see, in our house, anything less than perfection was unacceptable. And getting a C on a test was like failing.

"What am I going to do?" I turned towards my brother, fear already coursing through my veins.

He had no words. What could he possibly say? He knew what would be coming later, there was no denying it. There was no way we could lie to father, he would know. All he could do was reach over and squeeze my hand reassuringly, telling me he'd help as much as possible in the aftermath. I held on to it tightly, not wanting him to let go. I didn't care if anyone saw me, I needed Jasper.

The rest of the period was a blur; luckily we watched a film so I didn't exactly miss anything important. The bell ringing snapped me out of my daydreams, and straight into my living nightmare. With a protective arm around my shoulders, Jasper led me out of the classroom, to our lockers and eventually to the car. Edward sensed immediately that something was wrong and when I told him, the same look of fear appeared in his eyes.

Riding in car, I wanted nothing more to fall asleep and pray that when I woke up, we'd be anywhere but at our house. But, fifteen minutes later, we were pulling up into our driveway that led to our house; a house away from everyone, away from neighbors. A place where no one could hear our screams, our cries no matter how loud. I always wondered if father planned it this way. I wouldn't past him, he was a very precise man.

Getting out of the car, walking towards the front door, I could feel the fear already beginning to set in. It was one thing for father to hit us but, when you knew it was coming? Hell, it was so much worse. To know he was going to do something horrible to you and there was nothing you could do to prevent it, it was such a terrifying feeling.

Walking inside, I left my fake reality behind, entering my own personal hell. A hell that no one knew about, other than the people who lived behind these closed doors.

_Home_.

This wasn't a home, this was a raging inferno where no one was safe.

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**This is only the beginning and I'm both eager and nervous to see what people think. **

**There'll be more...hurt and Jasper next chapter. **

**By the way, the title of this story "Take A Bow" is taken from the amazing song by Muse. **

**Please review, I would love to know what you thought!  
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	2. Falling Away With You

**A/N: Thank you to everyone who read the first chapter, especially to those who reviewed. I know that this obviously is a difficult topic and I truly appreciate everyone who is giving this story a chance. **

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****CHAPTER 2: Falling Away With You**

**staying awake to chase a dream  
tasting the air you're breathing in  
I hope I won't forget a thing**

**promise to hold you close and pray  
watching the fantasies decay  
nothing will ever stay the same**

For two and a half hours, I paced around the house, doing all kinds of things, hoping desperately that my nerves would somehow subside by the time father got home. If he even so much as suspected that you were nervous, he would only hit you harder, claiming that we were stupid for being nervous and scared over things that were our fault.

At exactly five thirty, I started on dinner, knowing mother and father would be home within the next forty five minutes. While dinner had to be ready when he got here, it also wasn't allowed to be cold. So, everything had to be precise, like clockwork.

My mind not being capable of doing anything too complicated and knowing father wouldn't want a heavy meal since he and mother were going out, I decided to keep it simple and make some pasta along with some toasted garlic bread. Even in my current state, there was no way I could mess it up. Which was good because, I honestly couldn't afford for anything else to go wrong tonight.

Jasper and Edward, like always, had disappeared to their rooms once we got home. We all usually took advantage of the time when we had the house to ourselves for those two hours. Both my brothers were extremely talented when it came to things of a creative nature. Edward had always been an amazing writer, writing some truly heartbreaking poetry that he only shared with me. And Jasper was a surprisingly amazing photographer. That was something that hardly anyone knew about. Father had bought him a camera three years ago for Christmas and when he was able to, he was out taking pictures and doing all kinds of things with them on his computer.

While on the outside, it may look like we have a lot, I would personally trade every materialistic thing I had if it meant that I could live a life that was free of pain and suffering. Of course, pain is inevitable to nearly everyone but, to just live a life where we didn't have to hide or live in constant fear, that would be all I'd ever need.

I wasn't lacking when it came to creativity either. I knew how to play the guitar and I could paint. Art had always come natural to me but music not so much. Father had paid for all of us to take music lessons one summer and while others called us lucky, we silently hated it. As beginners, we weren't perfect but it was perfection that father expected from all three of us. If I didn't strum the chords right, he'd make me do it repeatedly, until my hands bled. Edward and Jasper both knew how the play the piano and they actually played rather well. We had a piano in the house and every now and then, one of them would sit and play, letting beautiful and tragic melodies fill the house.

Nothing in this house was never unconditional when it came to father. We had to work for everything we had. Cooking every day, it was just wasn't because father would hit me if I didn't it was because it was basically my job around here. I cooked, I got to go to school and occasionally some other 'perk.'

Honestly, I didn't really care anymore. I just did what I had to and prayed to God that each night, my bruises wouldn't be too noticeable or the pain too unbearable.

I was standing at the counter, chopping vegetables for the salad when the glass door slid open quickly. Startled, I jumped, the knife slicing my fingertip slightly.

"Shit" I frowned, looking at the small drop of blood forming. Looking around, I couldn't spot a towel or anything to apply pressure to it.

"Liz? Shit, I'm sorry I didn't mean to scare you." I looked up and saw Jasper standing in front of me, concern in his eyes.

I shrugged "it's nothing, just a bit of blood." Most people cringed at the sight of blood, not us though. This, this was nothing. When you've been forced to pull shards of glass out of your hand or other body parts, this was a walk in the park. Taking the hem of his shirt, he picked it up slightly before putting it against my finger to stop the blood. Try as I may, I couldn't help but let my eyes drop down to the bit of exposed skin; I was greeted with a glimpse of muscles. My brothers, while both lean and a bit skinny, had bodies that a lot of girls in school seemed to fall over themselves for.

"There" he held my hand closer to his face "I think it's stopped." He brought his lips and pressed them gently against my fingertip before turning my hand so that it was facing palm side up. The look of sadness didn't go unnoticed as his eyes became fixated on the scar on my right wrist. Neither of us needed any reminding of the night I got this. I perhaps have never cried so hard than I did the night mother had to pull the glass out of my wrist after father had gone on one of his rants, slamming my hand right into the pile of broken glass. The shards were small and it took forever to get out. Edward, having been too terrified, refused to come near me so Jasper sat with me, squeezing my other hand tightly as he tried to calm me down.

His fingers traced the scar that curved over my wrist and, much to my surprise, he brought it up closer and kissed it softly. I felt my heart beat increase slightly; no one had _ever _kissed my scars before and oh god, it felt so divine. Though I knew I shouldn't, I thought about what it would feel like if were to kiss my other scar that I had. My guess was that it'd feel amazing as well. His lips lingered there for what seemed like forever, neither of us wanting to move. I didn't exactly know what his reason was for doing this. It could've very well been an attempt to try and ease my nerves but, in my mind, I really hoped it was for another reason; that he _wanted _to do this.

"Jasper?" his name was a whisper but he still looked up at me "we should…" I lost all train of thought, seeing just how intensely his blue eyes were boring into mine. I didn't know what was going through his mind but, I knew that whatever it was, we should stop immediately. Though it felt incredibly good, something was telling me that it wasn't right.

Before he could open his mouth to say anything, Edward came running into the kitchen, a panicked look on his face; so much so that he paid no attention to the sight of Jasper still holding my hand.

"They're home and father doesn't look at all pleased." His words were rushed and I felt my heart drop.

_God, no no please don't let this be happening. _

If father was already upset, that was not going to boast well for me what so ever and both Edward and Jasper knew that.

"Liz, breathe." Jasper wrapped his arm around my shoulders, pulling me in for a sideways hug "Breathe." Nodding, I took my free hand and grabbed Edward's, bringing him closer to me as well. The three of us stood there, no words for a moment as we prepared ourselves for what was to come. There were no words or promises of things being okay because, we all knew that'd be a lie so, all we could do was get ready. We heard the front door opening, father's loud voice carrying straight into the kitchen as he still continued to yell, going on about something. Jasper and Edward quickly made their way out towards the living room to greet father as mother came into the kitchen, a tired look on her beautiful face. I raised my eyebrow as I finished the salad, silently asking her what happened.

She shook her head "it's nothing sweetie, he's just overreacting." No, it wasn't, it was everything! She helped me get dinner finished up, not making father wait for than five minutes. By the time we took the food out, he along with my brothers were already sitting at the table as he continued to rant

"And then the idiot had the audacity to hit on your mother!" he banged his fist on the table, causing me to jump "needless to say, that little fucker was fired." I didn't know what he was talking about but we all just nodded at whatever it was.

"Evening father." I kissed his cheek quickly, as was a must every night. He didn't say anything, like always. I never understood why father didn't want us to call him dad or something less formal but, my guess would be that by calling him father, it gave him a bigger sense of power or something. Mother helped me serve and pass out plates. Just as I set Edward's plate in front of him, I heard father clear his throat and I just about dropped his food all over him.

"Eliza, Jasper?" Father called us; I stood very still, turning towards him.

"Yes father?" we bother answered.

"You got the results of your test today, am I correct?"

"Yes, sir." Jasper answered for both of us. How he remembered these things was beyond me. Maybe he had them written down somewhere but, that was the least of my problems right now.

"Well? What did you two score on this test?"

"A ninety four." Jasper looked over at father, awaiting his reaction.

"Do better next time, Jasper. That's barely an A but, acceptable." I could see the relief in my brother's eyes but at the same time, fear.

"And you Eliza?" father looked up at me and I could feel myself shaking already.

"A seventy nine." My voice was tiny and the second his eyes narrowed at me, I wanted nothing more than to crawl under the table and hide.

"Excuse me young lady?" the way he was staring at me rendered me speechless for second "Eliza!" he raised his voice, and I jumped back slightly "come here, now." I walked over to him, wanting nothing more than to just turn around and runaway.

"How many times do I have to tell you Eliza that grades like this will not be accepted in this house? How many times do I have to tell you to not be a fucking failure!"

"Father, I…" I stopped, realizing the huge mistake I had just made; never talk back to father. "Forgive me, please."

He scoffed at that "Jasper" father peered around me "come." Jasper was out of his seat, and standing beside me a moment later "now, was it not your job to help your sister study for this test?"

"Yes, sir."

"And did you help her to the best of your ability?"

"Yes, but…"

"No, buts Jasper. If you helped her as best you could, shouldn't she have done better?"

"It was a rather difficult test." He tried to defend me but father couldn't care less. Father was up out of his seat in a blink of an eye, his hand slapping Jasper across his face roughly; the sound making me cringe. Jasper didn't even flinch when father slapped him, he too knew that this was nothing compared to other things.

"Don't defend her, Jasper. Teach her a lesson boy."

I felt my heart drop at that. Father hadn't done this in a long time; the last time being when we were thirteen and I had broken something of Jasper's. Father loved this, and we all knew it.

"Father, I…"

"Do it Jasper! Or so help me God it'll be so much worse for her." He turned to look at me and my eyes widened at the hatred he held towards me.

"Honey, please." I heard my mother pleading.

"Shut up, Esme! This has nothing to do with you! Mind your own." He shut mother up quickly; she was just as terrified of him as we were "now Jasper, either you do it or I will really make her scream."

He swallowed thickly as he looked over at me, his eyes void of any emotion. I knew what he was doing; he was trying to detach himself from the situation. I thought about closing my eyes but I couldn't find the will. It was a mere ten seconds later that I felt Jasper's hand coming in contact with my face. Though he didn't have the amount of strength father had, it still hurt like hell. I bit back my scream when he hit me a second time, knowing father wouldn't be satisfied with him just hitting me once. My ears were ringing due to the force and I was bit dizzy as well; nothing I hadn't experienced before but it still didn't make it any easier.

My brother, one of two people who I trusted the most, had just hit me, hard. Though I knew I should be terrified of him, all I wanted to do was wrap my arms around him and tell him that everything was going to be fine. I realized then just how twisted all this was.

Looking at him, he didn't say anything, his lips were pressed in a tight line and he looked completely disgusted with himself. We all remained silent, no one moving for what seemed like forever.

"Consider yourself lucky Eliza. Go sit down." He sat back in his seat, acting as if nothing had just happened. I took my seat next to Edward, not daring to look up. My cheek was starting to burn and it hurt so bad. I wanted to cry so badly but knew I couldn't. We all ate in silence until father decided it was time for him and mother to head out for their Friday outing. Mother quickly obeyed, getting up and helping me clear the table. When the two of us stood in the kitchen as I began to wash them, she came closer to me, squeezing my hand.

"I'm so sorry my sweet girl." She whispered, hugging me gently. Mother always blamed herself when father hit us. Bad enough he hit her, but when it came to us kids, she hated it. As much as she wanted out, she knew she couldn't. Father would, like I said, track us all down and then do who knows what.

"Don't mom" I kissed her cheek. I never blamed my mother for any of this. She had no idea the type of man father would turn out to be. This wasn't her fault, even if some people would see it that way. "I'll be okay." I tried to reassure her but we both knew it was a lie. We were all dying little by little everyday in this place. What was worse was that we couldn't do anything about it.

Fifteen minutes later, mother and father were gone for the evening, to return sometime in the early morning as usual. Where they went I wasn't exactly sure. Wherever it was, it was someplace fancy because mother always looked beautiful in her dresses. Father was smart, never hitting her on her face, only places that could be covered by clothing.

I stood in the kitchen alone, washing all the dishes and putting them all away. When I was done, I was exhausted. Though only seven thirty, I was ready to sleep. Slowly climbing up the stairs, I passed by Edward's room, seeing him writing in his journal. He always did this after one of us was hit. He never handled it all that well and it was best to just leave him alone until he was ready. My brother, such a sensitive soul. He didn't deserve all the anxiety he endured because of father. Edward had been known to literally get sick when one of us was beat. Passing by, he looked up at me for a second, his eyes pleading. I gave him all I could; a weak smile and a wink, trying to assure him that it wasn't that bad. But, who the hell was I kidding?

Jasper's door was closed, as I expected it would be. I couldn't even think about it as I made my way into my own room, wanting to just stand under the hot water, in hopes that some of this pain would melt away. However, I soon came to discover that the pain was more mental and emotional than it was physical. I was in the shower for a good forty five minutes, letting the hot water wash over my body. When the water started to run cold, I got out, wrapping my towel around me.

Brushing my teeth and hair, I desperately tried to avoid looking at my reflection but, it was inevitable and I finally looked up, dropping my brush in the sink as I gasped.

I knew that Jasper had hit me hard, but I hadn't expected the bruise to trail from my upper cheek, all the way up into my hair line. There'd be no way to hide this, no way. Panic set in when I thought about Monday and what I would have to do to even think about covering it. It was already starting to form, shades of black and purple masking the right side of my face.

After having my little pity party, I slipped on my bra and panties, followed by a pair of black silk shorts. These shorts were meant to make women feel sexy but, I felt anything but. I felt exposed every time I wore them but I knew I had no other choice. Looking around, I saw that I hadn't brought a fresh shirt in with me so I walked out the bathroom, just a bra covering my upper half.

I exited the bathroom just as my bedroom door opened, Jasper standing there a bit surprised for a moment before just shutting the door behind him. In his hands I saw that he had a towel with some ice wrapped in it and the first aid kit. Like he had silently promised, he had come to help with the aftermath. Though, I doubt he thought that he'd be trying to clean up something he had been forced to do.

I watched as he came closer, his eyes not so discreetly roaming over my body, landing on my chest. I instantly felt that funny feeling again when he finally reached me, gently running his hand over my cheek. I tried but couldn't fight back the whimper that passed my lips when he did it. Unlike when I was around Edward, I didn't have to be strong with Jasper. Jasper was stronger, emotional wise and at the moment, all I wanted to do was break down and cry.

While Edward _needed _me to be strong, Jasper merely expected me to but, we both knew it was virtually impossible. Sometimes you just can't take it; sometime you just need to break.

Setting the kit down, he opened it and pulled out some medication. He put some in his hands before gently touching the corner near my eye where there was a small cut. I hissed in pain when he did it, the medicine burning me. Grabbing my face gently, Jasper blew on the cut for a moment, the coolness of his breath both calming the fire on the outside and igniting it on the inside.

He motioned for me to sit down as he grabbed the ice that was wrapped in a towel. As horrible as it sounded, you'd think that we'd have plenty of ice packs in the freezer but we didn't. He sat beside me on the bed, gently pressing the ice against my cheek. If we iced it now, it would help with the swelling and perhaps not turn into such a nasty bruise.

He didn't say anything for the longest time, just focused on the ice and my cheek. When it began to melt however, he finally looked up to meet my gaze and I nearly broke at the look in his eyes. He looked helpless, guilt ridden. Though he didn't say it, his eyes were silently begging for forgiveness.

I nodded slowly, telling him that he was forgiven. Not that I blamed him for this. He set the towel on the floor, kissing my cold and bruised cheek. My eyes fluttered closed at the contact, loving the feel of his lips on my skin. For a second, I forgot about all the pain.

"Don't hate me Liz." He whispered in my ear. I pulled away from him and was shocked to see that he was trying so hard not to break in front of me. "I…I didn't know what else to do." his voice trembled a little bit, the emotionless void in his green eyes no longer there. Showing emotions didn't just go one way when it came to the two of us; as much as I allowed myself to break in front of Jasper, he showed more emotion to me than he did to anyone else in the house.

"No, please" I stopped him, pressing my finger to his lips "no guilt, Jasper. Just…" emotion thick as syrup filled my throat "can you just…hold me?" an odd request, something I had never asked Jasper for. Usually, it was Edward who held me close, telling me things were going to be okay but right now, it was his arms that I longed to be in, wrapped up and taken away from all this pain. Simply put, I _needed _him.

He nodded quickly, getting up to pull back the blankets back, motioning for me to get in. I slid up towards the head of the bed, about to get under the comforter when he stopped me. Without words, he lifted off the black t-shirt he was wearing and handed it to me. I slipped it on over my head, immediately surrounded by his scent. It smelt so good, and there was something about wearing his shirt that made that fire start up again, especially when I saw him shirtless.

Tanned, beautiful and strong were the first words that popped into my mind as my eyes scanned him. I wanted nothing more at that moment than to lean forward and touch him. But, now was not the time for that. Jasper turned off my light as I got under the blankets, him joining me soon after. Both of us facing each other, he wrapped an arm around me, bringing me closer to him, pressing me against him tightly. I buried my face against his bare chest and before I knew it, there were tears falling freely onto his skin. He didn't say anything, just held me tighter, his head resting on top of mine.

Moments like this, there were never any words needed. Emotions were always better than words when it came to Jasper and I. We could have silent conversations about anything, and no one would ever know what we were talking about.

Crying had never felt so wonderful. I believe I cried for not only myself but for Jasper and Edward as well. Though they had not been hit, they might as well been. We were close, and when one of us was hurt, we all seemed to feel it. Whoever suffered father's wrath, the other two were left both thankful and guilt ridden. It was an odd cycle to be in but after years of abuse, you simply get used to it.

After awhile, I shifted slightly so that I was somewhat on my stomach, my head still resting comfortably against my brother. I was resting on my non bruised cheek so the pain wasn't too bad. In attempt to make me more at ease I suppose, I felt Jasper's hand on my lower back, slipping underneath the hem of the shirt before rubbing soft, soothing circles with his hand. I began drifting off to sleep right away, something that almost never happened. Something about being with him made me feel safe. My eyes were heavy as they drooped shut but, when I moved slightly again, my leg moving up against Jasper, I felt him tense.

"Liz" his voice was somewhat strained as he said my name. I looked up right away, confused.

"Are you okay?" I wondered if I had hurt him or something "did I do something wrong?"

He pushed some hair out of my face "no, Liz. You didn't do anything wrong." He reassured me.

"Then why did you…"

"It's nothing." He leaned down, pressing his lips to my forehead "now come on, you need rest."

Listening to him, I went back to my former position and soon enough, sleep found me.

I awoke sometime later to the sound of the door being slammed shut. I immediately sat up, a bit startled when I was met with Jasper's sleeping face before remembering all that had happened. I could hear father beginning to yell at mother as they made their way up the stairs.

"Jasper" I whispered, shaking him gently. His eyes opened right away, narrowing when he heard the commotion as well. "they're back."

"I just want to check on them, make sure they're okay." Mother's gentle voice came from outside my door.

"I swear to god Esme, you care way too much about them. They're practically adults, not babies." Father's voice was outside the door as well.

"They're all my children" mother's voice was strong, as it was whenever she tried to defend us "and I love them." There was a hand on the doorknob and it began to turn but it suddenly stopped.

"Damn it Esme" father hissed "let's go."

"We just got back home."

"Now" his voice was cold and menacing "you need to be taught a lesson my dear wife. You need to be reminded just who it is you're supposed to be loving here. And rest assured, it's not the idiotic intern from the office nor is it these three ingrates." I looked up at Jasper, who just shook his head. I hated it when father called us that; we were anything but.

"But darling" mother began and then there was a thud against the wall. I felt Jasper shift, like he wanted to go out there but I placed a hand on his chest and mouthed 'no.' If he did, it'd only be worst for both himself and mother.

"We're leaving Esme, going back to hotel where I'm going to fuck the shit out of you all night." He practically growled and I could only imagine what he was doing to her right outside the door.

"Oh, darling" mother said again only this time, she was a bit breathless. Her breath hitching could be heard from where we were.

"Fuck, Esme. So wet." Father's voice was deeper than normal "don't even deny for a second that I'm the only man who can make you scream." I knew he was talking about something sexual with her but, it made me sick to my stomach to think that he made her scream in pain as well.

I cringed at that. Hearing father talk like that to her, it was like eaves dropping on a conversation we didn't need to be hearing. After a few more words, the front door was slammed again, the car pulling out of the driveway once again.

"She'll be okay won't she Jasper?" I looked back up at my brother. As much as I worried about my brothers, I also worried about my mother. Being a woman, she wasn't as strong as Jasper and Edward. She, like me, didn't have the highest pain tolerance level but, like her, we had learned to be endure, to remain silent and not make too much noise when pain was inflicted upon us.

"Don't worry little sister" he nodded "it'll be okay." He repositioned us so that I was slightly on my back with one of his arms still around me. We weren't alone for long however when I heard the bedroom door open and shut quietly. Looking up, I saw Edward walking towards the bed, climbing in under the blankets silently. He didn't say anything about Jasper being in the bed, he just looked at me. He was scared, I knew he was. Turning so that my back was facing Jasper, I grabbed Edward's hand and held it tightly, knowing he needed it. He smiled in silent thanks, resting his head on the pillow. He was out in a matter of minutes, still clutching my hand.

Edward was such a fragile, delicate soul and I loved him for it. He, out of the three of us, was always affected deeper whenever one of us got hurt. He hated the yelling, the cries more than Jasper and I. Well, Edward showed more of his emotions than we did. Which, there was nothing wrong with that. As much as it pained us all, we had all made sort of this pact long ago that no matter what, we would always be there for each other, to defend one another. Well, attempt to defend at least.

We would do all we could to protect each other. At the end of the day, all I had were the two boys that were lying in my bed. Boys that had turned to men too quickly at their young age; forced to deal with abuse as well as having to witness it as well.

As I began to fall asleep once again, I felt Jasper pull me a bit back closer against him. And call me crazy, but I swore I heard a low moan pass his lips when he did so. Too exhausted to question or think, I simply overlooked it as sleep came over me once again.

This time however, I prayed that I could sleep longer and peacefully. Just a few hours of not having to worry, that's all I wanted; all I wanted for the three of us.

Edward clutched my hand tighter while Jasper held me tighter. Right now, even though I was the one hurt, they needed _me _to be there for them, to be strong. And so help God, I was going to do whatever to took to be there for them.

Because deep down, there was still the smallest sliver of hope that one day maybe, just maybe, things would be okay; that they would be better for all of us and we wouldn't have to spend each day hiding but rather, spend each day living freely.

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**The relationship that these three siblings has is by no means 'normal' in the minds of a lot of people but, you have to see it from their perspective. When all they have is each other, things are going to be different, a bit abnormal. **

**Your thoughts are greatly appreciated.  
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	3. Dark Shines

**Thank you everyone who has put this story on their alert and favorite list. It truly means a lot to me! I know that this isn't a walk in the park, this story so for people to read it, makes me day. **

**I promise in this chapter, there will be a small break from the abuse. **

**All Twilight characters do not belong to me; all I own is Eliza.**

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****Chapter 3: Dark Shines**

**Passing by you light up my darkest skies  
You take only seconds to draw me in  
So be mine and your innocence I will consume**

**Dark shines  
Bringing me down  
Making my heart feel sore  
Because it's good**

**Eliza**

Waking up hours later, the sun barely beginning to shine through my window, I found myself to be a bit sweaty, my hair slightly matted to the side of my head. Even though we were still in winter, the temperature was quite different in the room. Looking up, my eyes adjusting to the little bit of light, I found out why. Not only was the heater on, the warm air filling in the room but also because I was somewhat sandwiched between my two brothers.

It took me a few moments but the events of last night soon came flooding back to me with a vengeance; Father beyond upset over my grades, Jasper hitting me, him coming to help me, mother and father doing god knows what in the hallway, Edward coming in because he was scared and finally, falling asleep with Jasper's arm tightly wound around my waist, like he was holding on to me as if I was his only source of stability.

When things happened, I had, over the years, developed a sort of defense mechanism. I would basically push everything that occurred to the back of my mind, hoping desperately that it wouldn't come back to haunt me later. Which, they hardly did being as there was always something new to replace it within a day or so. It wasn't healthy by any means but, this was just my way of dealing, of coping with things.

I noticed that Edward had long since let go of my hand and had rolled over and was hugging my pillow tightly against his chest. The shirt he was wearing had risen a bit in the back and I watched as the muscles moved with each steady breath. I relaxed considerably at the hearing him breathe so peacefully. On more than one occasion, Edward would have these horrible nightmares, waking up everyone in the house; which, that was never a good thing on so many levels. The main thing was that if Edward woke up father by having a nightmare, the end result was never good.

When we were younger, I would have nightmares all the time but, as time went on and the abuse became more frequent, I soon became numb and realized that no matter if I was awake or asleep, my reality wasn't going to change. I don't even remember what it was like to dream anymore. All happy dreams faded away a long time ago.

As I continued to lay there for some time, a peaceful silence filling the room, I looked down to find that Jasper still had his arm wrapped around my waist while his face was buried in my hair and he was snoring softly. Jasper has always loved the way my hair smells. Well, that's what he's always told me.

While there may not have been any happy dreams, I realized that I had slept the entire night without so much as waking up once. Usually, any little sound and I was up, on my guard as always. Whether it was because I knew father wasn't at home or because I had both my brothers with me, I wasn't too sure. My guess was that it was a combination of the two.

There was no way I was falling back asleep now but there was also no way I was going to move, potentially waking one or both of the boys up. Father and mother probably wouldn't be back until the afternoon so I knew that we'd be alright sleeping in for an extra hour or two. It was completely necessary however for all of us to be up and about by noon. Whether they returned in time or not, lunch had to be ready by one and not a minute later. Shutting my eyes, a flashback flashed before me to the day, two years ago when I had innocently taken a nap and had missed making lunch entirely and father just so happened to show up unexpectedly and was absolutely furious when there was no food for him. He cursed, pulled me right out of bed and down the stairs. Though I only stumbled, I was left was severe bruising for a few weeks.

I never made that mistake again. In fact, I don't think I've taken a nap since; scared of the same thing happening again.

Lost in my memories, something suddenly snapped me out of them. There was something moving across my skin gently. Not wanting to move, I just lay there, feeling. Somehow, the hem of my shirt had been pushed up a few inches so that my stomach was slightly exposed. A warm hand was now resting against my stomach as I felt fingers moving back and forth across my skin, fingertips creating little patterns of nothing. I wondered frantically what Jasper was doing or if he was even aware of it. But, when I felt his fingers circle around my belly button before moving a bit lower, I knew he wasn't sleeping. If he was, it must've been some dream he was having.

It took all I had to not gasp when I felt him tracing the hem of my shorts, running his fingers lightly across the skin. The temptation was so great; one little shift and his hand would undoubtedly slip inside. Oh, god I could only imagine what his fingers would feel like in the most secret of places for a woman.

The more I thought about it, the bigger the temptation became but I knew I had to resist. While my mind was screaming no, my body was craving a yes, a feeling of warmth spreading through my body, resulting in a tingling sensation between my legs. I had no idea what it was, having never felt this before. No one had ever touched me so gently on this part of my body and damn it felt so good.

Deciding that I needed to do something, or at least figure out why Jasper was torturing me like this, I rolled over slowly, his hand still on me so that when I was facing him, it was now resting on my hip. I didn't even look up because I was suddenly face to face with his chest; strong, he had held me against that chest all night, making me feel so safe. While I was a bit of a disadvantage, being trapped by him, I was still able to reach my right hand up, trailing my finger up his chest before leaning in to press a soft kiss against him.

The reaction I got out of him wasn't one I had been expecting; it was a low moan, slightly vibrating against me. His hand gripped my hip tighter, before it slowly moved down and coming over my backside. This time however, I couldn't stifle my gasp as he touched me there for a moment before grabbing my leg and hitching it around his waist slightly. Neither of us said or looked at one another. Rather, my eyes were locked on his hand resting on my leg as he moved his hand up and down gently. His touch was sending a million shockwaves all throughout my system. I wanted him to do more but, I knew that wouldn't happen; it couldn't happen.

His movements were slow, deliberate and it was taking every ounce of my strength to not just wrap myself tighter around him, wanting both his body and comfort to surround me completely.

After a few minutes of this, I don't even know what, I knew I needed to look up and see what in the world was going on here. I slowly started creeping my hand up along the same arm that was resting on my leg. Once I reached the top, my hand skimming the side of his neck, I knew I had no choice now then to look up and face him. I hesitantly raised my head, first only peering up at him through my eyelashes. Not too surprisingly, he was staring right back at me.

I have never experienced desire; never experienced lust but at this very moment, I knew that it was exactly what I was looking at right now. Jasper's eyes were not their usual shade of green but rather, they seemed to have darkened a bit; something I didn't even know was possible.

His hand still resting on my leg, my hand still touching him gently, we were in a very intimate position to say the least, even I knew that.

"Jas.." I began to say his name but his hand quickly left my leg, his fingers pressing against my lips, ceasing all talking. Things were starting to get both odd and a bit intriguing. I simply watched as he moved his hand, brushing some of my matted hair behind my ear before touching my bruised cheek. It was still a bit tender and I bit my lip to hide my discomfort.

He looked down at me for what seemed like forever. I had no idea what was going on. All I knew was that one of us would gather the courage to do something. I had never been kissed before but, I was pretty certain that this is how it went and started. Question was, did I want him to do it? This was clearly not my area of expertise, having been forbidden from ever dating.

Whatever my decision was, I found myself closing my eyes, fully prepared to take whatever came at me.

I felt him shift a bit closer to me, little by little…

"No, please!" a scream startled the two of us, our hands dropping from each other as I turned quickly as I could. Sitting up, I saw that Edward was still facing the window but he was visibly trembling. Looking back at Jasper, he gave me a curt nod, telling me he'd help me. His eyes had returned to their normal color as we both watched helplessly for a few moments as our brother's shakes began to turn more violent. I got on my knees and slowly crawled over towards him while Jasper got off the bed completely, coming up on the other side so he was standing before Edward.

"Edward" I leaned down a bit, speaking gently and calmly in his ear. As expected, he attempted to push me away from him but Jasper had his upper body pinned down somewhat with his arms "Edward, babe it's me." I placed my hand gently on his shoulder.

"Don't hurt me please" the emotion in his voice was thick as he pleaded "I promise to never do it again!"

"Shh, Edward please" my attempts at trying to soothe and wake him up seemed to be in vain as he was still shaking but I knew I couldn't give up nor get angry "please Edward, open your eyes. See that it's just me and Jasper."

"Please, please!" he cried some more

"We won't hurt you" I moved my hand up and down his arm softly.

"Edward" I looked up, seeing that Jasper had loosened his grip "listen to Liz, we're here for you man."

Slowly but surely, his trembling slowed down a bit and we watched as he hesitantly opened his eyes, glancing at Jasper first before turning around to look at me. Immediately, his eyes grew wide in fear as he took in the bruise on my cheek. He hadn't seen it this morning when he had come in; it was never easy on him.

"Liz" his voice cracked "oh, god Liz I'm so sorry." He fully turned around, wrapping his arms around my waist, practically knocking me back down onto the bed. Adjusting myself quickly, I sat correctly and moved Edward so that his head was resting in my lap.

"There's nothing to be sorry for Edward" I started running my hand through his hair "it looks worse than it actually is. It'll be gone in a few days." I continued this reassuring conversation for a good ten minutes while still threading through his hair. I had done this so many times that it was like second nature to me now. It never failed; these things always seemed to calm my brother down, no matter what his nightmare was about or what he had gotten so upset about.

Taking care of him had always been a top priority of mine. Though we were all nearing eighteen, there were times when Edward's mind seemed to revert back to another time. Perhaps it was another defense mechanism, I wasn't so sure. It wasn't like we could take him to see a doctor about it, father would probably put us on permanent lock down if we were ever to do something like that.

However, for now, this seemed to work for him and I would do it willingly, if it meant calming my poor brother down.

Hearing someone clearing their throat, I looked up to see Jasper still standing there, still shirtless with his hands shoved into his jean pockets "I'm uh…I'm going to go take a shower." He mumbled before leaving the room quickly. I stared at the closed the door before looking back at my brother who was staring at me with a confused look. I merely shrugged and gave him a smile.

Though I was still somewhat tired, I knew there was no way now that anyone was going to get to sleep in a little bit longer. Giving up, I decided it'd be best to just move on with the day.

"Come on, let's go make some breakfast" I kissed Edward's forehead before gently moving him off of me. I climbed off the bed first, expecting him to be right behind me but when I turned around, he was sitting on the bed still, his head tilted a bit.

"That shirt's a little big on you, Liz."

"Edward don't" I groaned. I didn't want to deal with this right now.

He gave me one of those infamous grins before shaking his head and getting off the bed, wrapping his arm around my shoulder as we made our way into the kitchen.

It was nice to have someone in the kitchen with me as I cooked. Normally, I was all alone, no one ever joining me other than father. Being as I woke up earlier than the boys, they almost never ate breakfast with me, even on the weekends. Sometimes father and mother worked on Saturday's but even then, both boys usually slept in til almost noon on those days so, I'd eat alone.

I decided to make all three of us omelets, it being something different than our usual cereal or granola bars. I knew if father was here, he'd absolutely forbid me from eating it, claiming it had so many calories and it'd make me fat. To hell with that, one little omelet wasn't going to hurt me.

We were careful to make sure the entire house didn't smell like food so we had both the window and back door wide open. Though it was cold, it wasn't too bad.

As I was serving the plates, I heard Jasper walking into the kitchen, automatically walking over to help Edward. It was an unspoken rule between the three of us. Whatever the three of us were doing, it was just common sense for everyone to help out. I placed the plates on the table as Edward set out napkins and silver wear and Jasper served everyone a glass of orange juice. We sat, just like at school, in a half circle.

We ate quietly for a few minutes before Edward looked up at the two of us.

"Thanks you guys for helping me earlier."

The two of us nodded; there was no reason for him to thank us but he always did it.

"We're always going to help you Edward, you know that" I patted his hand gently "we got to stick together."

The rest of the meal passed with comfortable silence, all of us able to talk without fear of getting in trouble. When we were all down, I cleared the table, fully prepared to wash the dishes when I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"I'll do them." I glanced up at Jasper.

I shook my head "No, it's fine" this was my job, what I did every day.

"I'll do them, Liz." He repeated. Knowing he wasn't going to budge, I gave in handing him the small pile of dishes.

Since I didn't have to wash them, I decided to go take a shower. I needed to get away and just think for a little while. The boys thanked me for breakfast, the satisfied look on both their faces pretty evident. Making my way upstairs, I grabbed my clothes for the day before locking the bathroom door behind me. Turning the water on, I undressed quickly as I waited for the water to get warm. When I slipped Jasper's shirt off of my body, I held it in my hands for a minute, staring at it as if it held the answers to all my questions. Without thinking, I raised it, inhaling it for a second, a small smile forming on my lips as I noticed it now had both mine and his scent on it. Sighing, I threw it in the hamper, knowing that last this afternoon, that scent would no longer be on it after I did all the laundry.

Finally standing under the hot water, I thought about everything that had happened this morning and last night. What had Jasper's intentions been this morning when his hands had begun moving along exposed skin with his dark, intense eyes staring at me like I was the only person in the room? God, whatever it was, it was having quite the effect on me. So much so that I had to lean against the cool tile for a moment to calm down my somewhat erratic breathing.

"Get a hold of yourself, Liz" I reprimanded myself "you're looking way too much into this."

Deep down though, I knew I wasn't. I had seen something there and it wasn't just this morning. For the past few months, I've noticed that things between Jasper and I have been changing. Changing into what, I had no idea but, something was telling me that this was just the beginning; and, I didn't know whether to be afraid or completely excited. For the first time, it seemed as though someone was taking notice of me and liking what they saw.

Yes, Jasper was my brother but, we weren't actually related. So technically, for me to even be thinking these things, it wasn't too bad right? Dear God I hoped so.

**Jasper**

It's official. I am one sick, twisted and perverted motherfucker.

God, all this time, I've hated the way father has stared at Liz, not even wanting to think about all the cruel and vile things he was probably thinking about her. Yet, there I was last night, completely captivated by her; while I tended to her fucking bruised cheek no less! A bruise that I had given her. And then so helped me god, she asked me to stay with her, the emotion so thick in her voice that I was afraid she was on the verge of breaking down. I know I sure as hell was, after being forced to hurt her. Liz, the one girl I had long ago promised I would love and take care for as long as I lived.

I had given her my shirt, allowing her to cover her chest. No woman had ever looked as sexy as she did at the very moment wearing my old t-shirt. I wanted her to wear them all the time, her delicious scent wrapped up in my clothing.

Liz was so innocent, so beautiful and here I was, her being the sole focus of my twisted fantasies.

But, I wanted her and I wanted her desperately. It was that desperation that I was so afraid of though.

"So Jasper" I heard my name being called as I shut off the water. Drying my hands on the towel beside me, I turned to face my brother, who was still in the same spot I'd last seen him "care to explain?"

I knew what he was talking about, but decided to play coy "explain what?" I set the towel down and leaned up against the counter.

"Well, lots of things dear brother" he laughed and I was actually relieved that he was in such a calmer state now. I hated when he had those nightmares, they scared the shit of me "but mainly, what was with you and Liz sharing a bed?"

I thought for a second about telling him some rude comment as to how he always stays with her but, I decided against it. I knew Edward didn't stay with Liz for anything other than comfort when he was terrified.

I shrugged "she asked me to."

"And did she ask to wear your shirt as well?"

"I.."

"Please, I'm not stupid" he shook his head "that shirt had your cologne scent all over it. That, and it was a bit big on her. And oh yes, when I woke up in the middle of the night, you were pretty wrapped up in her with your arm around her and face buried in her hair."

Shit, her hair smelt so good. I didn't know what it was it just, did things to me. And holding her against me, it was the best feeling. Her back had perfectly contoured itself to fit against mine.

"Fucking a man" I ran my hand through my hair "is it that obvious?"

He stared at me for a second, a slight grin on his face "well, if by obvious you mean the way you look at her, look when someone mentions her name than yes but, only to me."

"I don't know how this happened Edward"

When I touched her face and kissed her cheek and held her close to me, I suddenly wanted to know, wanted to taste her. Yes, we are not biologically related but damn it, over the past couple years, I've noticed myself having new and intriguing feelings when it comes to my sister. Feelings that I sometimes ache to explore with her. I love my sister, I always have but lately, I'm wondering just what and how this all happened. When did it stop being innocent and become something mature and sexual?

"I would think its pretty obvious Jasper. You've just been a bit blind to see."

"What?"

"Look the hell around Jazz" he sighed "we don't exactly have the best home life. For the longest time, it's been the three of us, sticking together through all the pain and tears. Me and you, we're all Liz has. And, I'm pretty positive that Liz depends on you more than she does on me." he gave a sad smile.

"Edward" I began but we both knew he was right "don't fucking beat yourself up over it, you have every right to get upset about things."

"It doesn't really matter. What matters is that you're stronger; you've always been there for Liz. Did you honestly think that as we got older and closer, those feelings of just sibling love weren't going to change?"

"I had never really thought about it actually." It was true "shit, I don't even know what love is Edward."

He quirked an eyebrow "I beg to differ Jazz. Love comes in different forms. I love the two of you so much but that love is different than the love you're experiencing for her."

"I've never known love Edward. Well, other than from mom but that's different. I don't know how to love someone. You say I love Liz but, what the fuck kind of twisted love is it when I hurt her?" I could feel anger rising in my veins again, thinking of what I had been forced to do last night. It is perhaps something I will never be able to forgive myself for.

"You didn't have a choice and you damn well that if you hadn't done it, father would've done something far worse." Though I knew he was right, I didn't want to be reminded of it "and, could you really live with yourself then?"

I shook my head, there was no way.

"I fucking hate him and I swear to god, if he lays one hand on her again…"

"Jazz" Edward looked at me, fear in his eyes "don't say things like that. You're not going to do anything to him."

"Why are you defending him?"

"I'm not, I hate him as much as you, maybe even more but, you and I both know that if you even so much as tried something the next time he hits Liz, we're all going to suffer from it. And I'm don't think you'd want to cause her any more pain than she already deals with daily."

_Any more pain than she already deals with…_

What kind of fucked up statement was that! Even worse, we both knew it was true. For too long he has been hurting Liz, far much worse than Edward or I and I don't quite understand. As much anger and pain that was floating in my system, I knew I had to be strong for when Liz. Hell, I needed to be strong for Edward too; my brother, so much weaker than me but at the same, had amazing strength when it came it our sister. We both hated seeing her hurt, especially when father laid his hands on her, in more than just an abusive manner. He was sick and sadistic.

My sister was a fighter. _We _were all fighters. No matter how bad the beatings were, we were still here standing and at the end of the day, that's all that mattered I suppose. At least, for now that's all we could take. Though, I was beginning to fear that this, this life we led, was going to be something permanent.

"So, when you going to tell her how you feel?" Edward snapped me from my thoughts and I looked at him like he was crazy.

"Tell her how I feel? Edward, I'm not doing that. Liz is liable to fucking freak on me. Just because I feel these things, who's to say that she is too?"

"What do you have to lose Jazz?"

_Everything._

"Her! I could lose her. She might not ever trust me again if I were to tell her. She'd probably think I was sick, just like _him_." The ice in my voice as I spoke of father didn't go unnoticed. If there was one person I never wanted to be compared to, it was that bastard. No way in hell would I ever act like he did.

"Jazz" Edward stood, coming towards me, placing his hands on my shoulders. Any other guy and I'd find this a bit odd but, it was Edward and this is just what he did "Liz knows you're _nothing _like father. She knows that you care about her. Maybe she'll be a bit hesitant at first but, there is no way in hell that she'd pass up on you. You're perfect."

I rolled my eyes at that last statement "I'm anything but Edward. Talk with your head, not your hormones."

"Look, I'm not saying you two need to turn into a couple or anything but, I think you at least owe it to her to tell her how you feel. Tell me Jazz, what is it that you want from Liz?"

I looked down for a second before glancing back up "I want her to be _mine_ and mine alone and damn it Edward, I want to kiss her, even if just once, I want to feel those lips against my own. I want her to see how much I care about her."

Edward chuckled, bringing one of his hands to slap my cheek gently "well, well looks like you do have a romantic side Jazz, I'm impressed."

God, my brother could be such a…girl sometimes. But, hell I loved him all the same.

"You know Edward, you're my fucking rock sometimes. I don't know what I would do without you."

He shrugged, backing away from me "we're brothers Jazz, and we both love Liz. I just want to see her happy. Girl needs some happiness in this life right?"

More than anyone, Liz needed it. She had gone through so much for all of us and she hardly ever complained. She always gave selflessly, putting Edward and I before herself. Even when she was in so much pain last night, she allowed both of us to stay with her, knowing we both needed her. She never turned us away or told us to deal on our own.

If anything, she was _our _rock.

The more I thought about it, the more I felt this funny feeling in my chest. A feeling of excitement maybe? If I could, even if for awhile, make her happy and forget this hell we were living in, then I would do it willingly.

I knew that what I felt was exactly 'right' but who the hell cared? Nothing in this life has ever been fair and right for us so why would this be any different?

Call me twisted but, there was also a part of me that wondered if she returned my feelings, would she be willing to let me kiss her? Let me taste her? Would she give me her everything for the sake of love and happiness?

Her love for me soothed my soul; could I do the same for her?

Could I, even for a moment, take her away from here and make her forget? Well damn, I sure as hell was going to try my hardest because, I would give up _everything _for Liz. Everything.

* * *

**See, not too bad right? **

**We had, the scene with Liz and Jasper...Edward's nightmare..but more importantly, the chat between the two brothers. Can I just say that Edward's character and role in this story is completely tragic and adorable, if that's even possible? **

**I do hope you all stay with me, especially after Jasper's POV, I'm wondering how people are going to react.**

**Oh, and I would really like it if you checked out my other two stories I'm working on. Thanks so much again!  
**


	4. Undisclosed Desires

**AN: Thank you everyone who continues to support this story. It's been long and tedious but I'm finally content with how this chapter came out. **

**I decided to give you both boys' POV this chapter. Quite frankly, I am love with my Edward and Jasper. Hope you all feel the same about them…if not, then I must persuade you!**

**As much as I wish I owned Jasper and Edward, I don't; merely objects of my desires. I do however, own Liz, who I hope you love as much as I do.**

* * *

**Chapter 4: Undisclosed Desires**

**I know you suffered  
But I don't want you to hide  
It's cold and loveless  
I won't let you be denied  
Soothe me  
I'll make you feel pure  
Trust me  
You can be sure  
I want to reconcile the violence in your heart  
I want to recognize your beauty is not just a mask  
I want to exorcise the demons from your past  
I want to satisfy the undisclosed desires in your heart**

**Edward **

I had come to think that luck no longer existed in my world; in the world that I, along with my brother and sister, lived in. However, I was proved wrong this afternoon when father and mother returned home, both in seemingly good moods. Of course, by good mood I meant father barely acknowledging us. Which, that was always a good thing because it meant we hadn't done anything wrong and no one would be hurting in the immediate future. Granted, I don't think that any of us ever actually did something _wrong _to deserve the punishment shelled out by father almost daily.

Whatever his reasoning, he retreated to his office that was on the second floor of the house, and we all knew what that meant; he had work to do. When father worked at home, it was virtually silent in the house. We couldn't have the television or any music on.

I was so overjoyed with this turn of events, I felt like I could just I don't know, burst or something. After my little chat with Jasper this morning, him confirming what I had long since known, I knew I had to have the same talk with Eliza. Though, if I had been dead on about Jasper, there would be no fault when it came to my sister; we were closer, and I knew that girl like the back of my hand. I'm positive that if she and I were biologically related, we'd have been twins.

I found the perfect opportunity too. Mother and Jasper were outside in the back yard, mother working on her garden while Jasper mowed the lawn. It wasn't raining right now so it had to be done quickly. Liz on the other hand, was sitting in the living room among piles of clothing, hangers and laundry baskets. Every Saturday was laundry day; another one of Liz's 'jobs' as she called it.

"Need help?" I sat on the couch across from my sister, giving her the smile I knew she loved.

She silently accepted, scooting one of the baskets towards me as I began folding the clothes.

"Are you feeling better?" her voice was soft after we fell into a comfortable pattern of folding and hanging things.

I merely shrugged and she seemed to know what that meant. I had to admit, this morning's nightmare wasn't as bad as some of the ones I'd had in the past but, it was by no means easy. Then again, are nightmares ever easy to deal with?

"You're really amazing you know that Liz?"

She paused for a second, tilting her head "thanks?"

"No, you really are" I decided to just jump into this conversation about Jasper "the way you helped me and Jasper last night and this morning, you're such a beautiful person. Both on the inside and out."

I watched as the very mention of our brother caused her to stall a bit, a look of longing in her eyes. _Yes, my little sister had it bad and she probably didn't even know it._

"You're my brothers" she sighed "I have to take care of you two."

Frowning, I leaned in closer to her "Liz" I took her hands in mine "the only person you need to take care of is yourself. You're far too precious to us."

She shook her head "Precious?"

"Yes, if anything were to ever happen to you, I don't think myself nor Jasper would ever forgive ourselves. We're both protective over you, and you know it."

To that, she smiled sadly "I just, love you both so much. I'm tired of all the pain but, I know that until the day that this all stops, I have to be strong and be there for you two whenever you need me."

"I know that you have to be strong for me sometimes Liz" she began to protest but I stopped her "but, sometimes you need someone to be strong for you too. You can't go through this alone and, I know that I'm not that strong and stable but Jasper" I paused, gauging her reaction; her eyes just remained fixated on our hands "Jasper is that rock to you; he can give you comfort and strength when you really need it."

She pondered my statement for a minute "Yes well, Jasper's great. I love him of course, just how I love you."

"Oh Liz" I laughed at her "I think you need to open your eyes little sister."

"What?"

"I see the way the two of you look at each other. There's something there. Longing, desire maybe?"

A beautiful blush crossed her face "Edward, I don't know about those kind of things."

"Well, maybe you're not aware of them but, I'm positive your body is well aware of them. Tell me Liz, I reached towards the top of my pile, grabbing Jasper's black shirt "I hold this, what does it do to you?"

"Edward, stop" she groaned "this isn't funny." She seemed a bit scared and I felt bad for her. Poor, innocent Liz.

"Tell me." I pressed "I assure you I won't laugh."

Taking a deep breath, she leaned in closer, her fingers grazing over the cotton material before looking up back at me "this morning Edward, something happened." Her voice was barely above a whisper.

Jasper hadn't mentioned anything and from the sounds of things, he hadn't tried anything. Curiosity got the best of me and I needed to know. I sat back as she explained, with very descriptive detail what had transpired between the two of them this morning.

"I was so sure he was going to try and kiss me but then, you woke up and all my focus went to you." The way she said it, I knew she didn't resent it but, she was definitely more confused now than ever "god Edward, is this wrong of me?"

"I'm not sure I know what you mean."

"Lately, when his hands are on me Edward, I want more. And dear god when he was touching my stomach, moving around my shorts, I wanted nothing more than for me to move, making him slip inside and underneath." She rambled, her blush returning "as good as it felt though, something keeps telling me that this is wrong. That I shouldn't want my brother in that…manner."

"Liz, listen to me. I may not know a lot but, look around honey, our life isn't exactly normal. For a long time now, it's been the three of us together, trying to protect each other as best as possible. Did you honestly think that as we got older, the feelings you had for him weren't going to change?" this was the same thing I had told Jasper and from the look on her face, she knew I was right; she had just been hiding how she truly felt.

"How do you know all this Edward?" she shook her head, partly in disbelief.

"I'm a very keen observer. Besides, Jasper told me this morning about how he feels as well."

She swallowed nervously "he did? What did he say?"

"Ah, afraid not little sister. You'll just have to find out on your own."

"The thought of being with him, completely terrifies and excites me." she sighed.

"I understand completely and believe me, if he was gay, I'd fight you tooth and nail for him."

And just like that, the tension broke as she started laughing at my last statement "Edward, you're too much sometimes you know that?"

"Of course" I stood, leaning to kiss her forehead "you're such a lucky girl, Liz." I whispered.

She nodded "I really am. You two are the best brothers I could ever ask for. I love you both so much" she slide her slender arms around my neck, allowing me to bury my face in her neck for a few seconds.

"No wonder Jasper can't resist you, you smell incredible Liz" I teased her once I pulled away "hmm, I think maybe if _I _weren't gay, I'd be fighting him. Though, if he even so much as…"

"Edward!" she pushed me slightly "don't even think that. You know Jasper would never hurt me."

"Oh, I know that but if it ever happens that he does something to make you even feel the least bit sad, I'll kick his ass, Liz."

She looked at me questioningly before the two of us started laughing. The thought of my attempting to fight Jasper was quite comical. I'd never stand a chance. Hell, I'm positive Liz would stand a better chance than I did.

I knew Jasper would never intentionally hurt Liz, let alone do something physically damaging towards her but still, accidents could happen; emotional trauma could be just as damaging. Though, with everything we were going through, I knew Jasper would do everything he could to make her happy.

"Will you two shut the hell up!" a loud, thunderous voice came from upstairs and we both froze immediately, waiting for any sign of father coming down the stairs. When he didn't, we breathed a bit easier. We had lucked out; usually father yelled and hit us. He must've really been busy I suppose. Exchanging looks of relief, we went back to the job at hand, finishing it in relative silence. However, there was a tiny smile on Liz's face the rest of the time and we both knew exactly why there was a smile on her face.

I had set it up and now it was just a matter of time. Quite frankly, I was glad. It was time these two got a bit of happiness in their lives. If my sister was happy, then I was happy. Besides, they say that no good deed ever goes unnoticed so who knows, maybe there might be a bit of luck out in the world left for me.

One could only hope.

**Jasper**

Today was Sunday; it was quite possibly my most favorite day of the entire week. Why? Two simple reasons. One, Sundays meant getting to go out to somewhere other than school. Yes, while it _was _church, we'd take what we could get. Besides, being out in public meant father couldn't hit us. Not that we would ever dare of acting out but, we could breathe a little easier on Sundays.

The second reason as to why I loved Sundays was about to come down the stairs at any minute. I know it's rather selfish and maybe a bit sick for me to look forward to this but, I couldn't care less. For as long as Liz has been part of this family, it has been a 'requirement' that she wear skirts and dresses every Sunday; even when it was the dead of winter, she still had to wear them. To me, Liz always looks like the epitome of beautiful when she dresses like this. Don't get me wrong, she looks amazing every day but even more so today.

A small creak of the weak above told me that someone was about to come down the stairs. I looked up hopefully, a slight grin appearing on my face when I saw that it was in fact my sister. She walked quickly down the staircase, entering the living room to come site beside me so we could wait for everyone else. Before she sat down next to me, I took the five seconds available to examine her from head to toe.

_Fuck, she was beautiful. _

She was wearing a skirt and sweater ensemble today; black on the bottom, a white sweater on top. To perhaps keep her legs warm, they were encased in a pair of black tights. Sitting rather close to me on the couch, she gave me a soft smile and before I could offer her one back, my smile dropped as a frown replaced it.

Though some of her hair was down, the bruise on her cheek was still very prominent. I couldn't resist it and soon, was hand was resting gently on it, in almost the exact shape of my hand.

"It's going to start fading soon" she attempted to placate me but I was already angry with myself, with father; the bastard "it's okay, Jasper."

"Liz" I moved my hand down, gripping her upper arm gently "you always say that things are okay when you know damn well they aren't."

"I know" she looked down, away from me "it's just, I hate seeing you boys upset on my account but, look at the bright side, at least no one got hurt yesterday." it was such a twisted thing for her to say but we both knew that we had to be grateful that yesterday was the first day in awhile that father didn't lay a hand on any of us. He had been so consumed with work that he even ate dinner in there while we ate with mother in the dining room. It was such a wonderful feeling to eat and not watch our every move.

If we were so lucky, today wouldn't be too bad either.

My conversation with Edward came rushing back to me as I watched her. I was supposed to be trying to make her happy and forget this hell hole we lived in, not constantly remind her of it.

"You're right Liz, you are truly selfless girl" I came closer to her, wanting nothing more at that moment than to finish what I had started yesterday morning but, something in her eyes stopped me. She seemed nervous, hesitant and above all, scared. Scared of me kissing her or scared of us being caught I wasn't so sure. Not wanting to completely blow my chances, I settled for giving her an innocent kiss on her forehead; something I almost always did.

She seemed content with that but she knew I wanted more and something inside told me that she wanted more too. Question was, how much longer could I resist temptation?

Soon enough however, the rest of the family came down the stairs and it was time to go. I thought that mother always looked absolutely stunning wherever it was she went. It was clear where Liz got her strength from. Though Liz wasn't really her daughter, she still seemed to have many of mother's traits. They two very amazing women and I would do anything to keep them safe, as would Edward.

We arrived at church at the exact same time as every Sunday; just at the moment where most of the people were already seated and could watch as we walked in. We sat in the exact same pew, every Sunday since I was a kid. It never failed as we walked in for people to stare and smile. Most of them knew who father was. They admired him, praised mother and envied us. God, if only these naïve people knew the truth. That behind the timid smiles and nods, we were completely terrified.

Damn townspeople, they had no idea.

We sat in the same order every week too; father and mother first followed by Liz sitting between Edward and I. I think Liz liked sitting in between the two of us. She felt safe there.

Service started and as required, we participated fully. Though the three of us weren't exactly religious, we couldn't act otherwise in front of father. While Edward and I merely went along with it, Liz was another story. She had never been profoundly religious but I believe that it was her undying faith that made her the person she was today. Her eyes never faltered when the priest would speak nor would her mouth remain shut when it was time to sing or pray. Even softly, her voice was gentle, sweet and very pure. On more than one occasion, I had caught her crying during one of the sermons. Usually, they were the ones that had to do with being strong or believing that good would come into your life. I think she honestly believed that one day, all this would end and it'd all be better. As much as I wished for that too, I knew I couldn't look towards a fantasy when reality was so harsh to us. However, I didn't have the heart to tell her that.

Faith had long since left my vocabulary. After my mother died, it started fading away. The when father remarried, it all just about died the day he began hitting us all the time. I found it very difficult to belive in a God who could let such horrific things happen to innocent people like my sister and Edward. What justice was being served there? Whatever my issues with God were, I blocked them away as we sat in church, not wanting Liz to believe that I didn't believe a word of it all.

As we sat there for the fifty five minute long service, I couldn't help but let my eyes gaze over at Liz from time to time. She didn't seem to notice me because she was completely focused on what was being said. Every little moment she made, I noticed. Each time she crossed her legs, I had to keep my hands away from her, wanting nothing more than to run them up her soft legs that were covered by those damn tights. Sitting beside me, her scent would hit me every now and then, sending my mind and body into what could only be described as overdrive. I had to keep my focus elsewhere and my thoughts on anything other than Liz because the last thing I needed was to be completely aroused in both church and sitting beside the object of my desire.

Finally, but as always, too quickly, the service was over and the patrons began to file out, speaking to one another in happy tones. Edward, Liz and I followed silently behind mother and father outside the church and for the briefest of moments, I let my hand graze Liz's as we walked outside the church. The small blush that formed on her cheeks made her even more tempting to me. I knew then this wouldn't be able to last any longer. I had spent the last few weeks fantasizing about my sister in ways that I shouldn't be.

"Ah, Mr. Whitlock" we paused outside as the priest spotted us, jumping into a conversation with father "how are things going?"

"Very well" father smiled; he was a pro at this. He could play any part he needed to play. Right now, it was the role of happily married and loving father. They chatted for a few moments before he looked over at us, looking as if he wanted to say something.

"Oh, dear Eliza" he frowned "what happened to your face dear?" I heard her soft intake a breath as she stood there, completely emotionless. I watched as father glared at her, silently warning her that she was to say anything but the truth and make sure it was believable or else.

_Shit, Liz say something!_

Liz however, had no words. I knew that she would never be able to lie to a priest. In her eyes, it was like lying to God. In a split second, I knew I had to come to my sister's defense or there'd be hell to pay later.

"Actually father, she had a rather clumsy moment the other day while we were working in the yard. I left some tools out and she tripped on them, fell right on the pavement." I lied smoothly, the one trait I had inherited from father that actually came in handy.

"Yes" Liz nodded, speaking softly "I fell." I could feel her heart breaking with each word as she spoke. Honestly though, there was no way we could tell him that our father had made me hit my own sister for his own sick, selfish reasons.

"Well dear, you must be more careful then. You could really hurt yourself."

_If only you knew…if only. _

We all walked back to the car in silence, father having parked at the very end of the lot.

"Eliza" he grabbed her arm tightly as we stood beside the car "next time, get your act together young lady. Your brother is not to defend you." he pushed her away slightly, wincing when she bumped into the car door. I took two steps forward but Edward put a restraining hand on my arm.

"Don't" he whispered softly as we got in the car. Damn it, I hated this man! Liz sat silently in the car, hands folded in her lap. Her eyes were glistening but she didn't dare let a tear fall. If she did, father was liable to stop the car and hit her on the side of the road; it wouldn't be the first time.

Liz didn't deserve this. She never did anything fucking wrong and yet here she was, living a life on pins and needles. She deserved love and happiness and I felt it even more up to me to give it to her.

Pulling into the driveway, father didn't turn the car off. Rather, he turned back and glared at us "well, get the hell out." he spat, startling the three of us "your mother and I are meeting some friends. Now, get out." he hissed, and we moved as quick as we could out the car. Mother waved to us, a small smile on her face and we waved back.

We all knew what this meant. If mother was out in public, she was safe for a few hours and if we were alone, then we were also safe for a few hours.

We walked silently into the house, me wondering what would happen if I just packed up our things and left. Would Edward and Liz come with me? Would we even get very far before father caught up with us? Those questions would never have answers because I knew we'd never leave; we _couldn't _leave.

I thought for sure Liz would go on an emotional rant about father when we were inside but instead, she just headed towards the kitchen, shrugging out of her sweater along the way "I'll make you boys something to eat." she set her sweater over a chair. Her arms suddenly bare, you could see just how much physical and emotional stress she was under.

"Jasper, go" Edward nudged me "do something. She's hurting right now and she'll break if she keeps doing this to herself." I knew he was right. Liz hardly ever reacted to father's tirades anymore because she knew there'd be a new one tomorrow.

"Liz" I quickly made my way into the kitchen "Liz, look at me" I grabbed her hand, turning her to face me "come on, come with me?"

"I'm fine, Jasper. So please, stop okay?" turning away from me, she headed back to start grabbing things.

"Like hell I will. You're coming with me, now. You don't need to cook for anyone right now." Holding my hand out to her again, her eyes flickered from my hand to back to me a few times.

Finally with a sigh, she set down the things in her hand before just nodding and coming with me. By the time I had her upstairs and in my room, I could see her fighting back the lump in her throat as tear threatened to spill over.

"Liz"

"I can't Jasper, I already cried the other night. I don't want to anymore" pacing around the room, she looked completely lost and broken "it just isn't fair" her voice was weak, strained.

I wanted to tell her that sometimes life isn't fair but, that would seem to be a bit of an understatement for us. Life hadn't been very fair for quite some time now.

"It isn't good for you Liz" I gripped her hand gently, brining her to sit down next to me "you can't always be the strong one."

"I'm tired of crying, Jasper. I'm tired of it. God, I wish…I wish I could just die than have to deal with this, seeing you boys hurt!"

Oh she wasn't about to go there.

"Liz" I turned her so she could face me "don't you _ever _say something like that again. I don't know what I would do without here. You can't give up. You have so much faith and hope; I need you to keep believing. Not only for yourself but for me because damn it, I have nothing left without it."

"Jasper, I…" she looked down "I didn't mean it" her voice, cracking with every word she said, told me she was fighting desperately not to cry.

"Liz, darlin' please" I pulled her to me "it's okay to cry." I soothed, pressing her tighter against me and after a few seconds, her sobs were the only thing filling the room.

"Shh, I'm here Liz." I rubbed her back softly as she continued to cry "I'm here." I couldn't offer her words of this never happening again or that it'd be okay but, I could offer her comfort.

When her sobs seemed to subside a bit, I knew that right now would be the opportune moment to attempt to finish what I had started again. With my hand still on her back, I began moving it up and down along her spine slowly. She seemed to like that, if her breathing was any indication. The top she was wearing was thin and I could feel every breath she took.

Pulling away from me slowly, she looked up, waiting for what I was going to do next. I could not deny my sister anything and at that very moment, the only thing I saw in her eyes was sadness and desire. Testing the water, I placed my hand on her cheek and she responded immediately by leaning into it, her breath just about driving me crazy; warm, soft and all around sensual as she peered up at me through her lashes.

"Liz" I found it hard to speak with her staring at me like that "fuck, I can't….it's too hard."

She misconstrued my words and backed away from me, hurt written all over her face.

"I thought…but…" she stammered, standing up slowly. Anger swelled out of nowhere and in a split second, I was grabbing her, sitting her on my lap.

"_No_" I hissed at her "you're not leaving me, Liz. Not when I've wanted this for so long" pushing her hair behind her ears, I began with her bruise, barely touching the now black and purple skin with my lips, skimming over it gently before moving down towards her neck. Nipping at the small bit of flesh over her collarbone, she gasped, wrapping her arms around neck before slightly tilting her head to the side.

"Jasper" my name was like a prayer off her lips "I..this is…we shouldn't…"

"Fuck that" I grabbed her tighter, her legs planted firmly on either side of me "I want you, Liz. Do you want the same?" her skirt had been pushed up a bit and I couldn't help but running my hands up her still encased legs.

_Please for the love of god, Liz say yes!! Please, please say yes. _

"I...Jasper, I…please?" she finally mustered out. What she was asking me for, I had no idea.

"Is that a yes?" I needed to know. I didn't want to do anything she didn't want; no matter how badly I fucking wanted it.

She shrugged, confusion in her eyes. Deciding to throw caution to the wind, I took her face in my hands, asking her silently if she still wanted out. If so, this was her final chance. When she made no attempt to move, I lowered her face to mine, and the moment our lips barely grazed each other, it was almost like this electric current that run through my body and I knew Liz felt it too.

Knowing there was no turning back now, I added pressure to each kiss I gave her until they were fully fledged and molded to each other. It was like a dance; slow, sensual and full of longing.

I didn't know if Liz had ever kissed a man before but hell, she was doing an amazing job; to the point where I was completely aroused with each little thing she did. So, when the shifted slightly in my arms, her hands moving up my neck and into my hair, I was two seconds away from ripping her skirt off and becoming one with her. While the need to be inside of her was tremendous, I knew it wasn't possible. If anything, I was lucky I was getting this kiss.

My arms around her waist, she kept shifting higher in lap until it finally got to the point where I was being pushed back onto my bed, resting flat on my back with Liz on top me.

"Oh" she whimpered against me when my hands slid down her back, over her ass and then back up again "Jasper…" without warning, she pulled away from me, her lips beginning to travel over my jaw and down my neck. She reached the base of my throat and began softly licking and sucking on the skin there.

"Oh, fuck" I gripped the back of her head, holding her to me, wanting nothing more for her to do this all day and night. It just so happened to be one of the spots that drove me completely insane. With one hand on her neck, the other reached in between us, slipping underneath the hem of her top. Slowly I moved, feeling her contract with each movement over her stomach. Just as I reached the silky material of her bra, barely grazing over the curve of her breast, she stopped abruptly before pulling away from me.

Staring down at me, confusion, lust and fear in her eyes, I knew I had both excited and terrified her just now.

_Shit, I had gone too far too soon._

"Liz, fuck I'm sorry" I ran my hands of hers softly, not wanting to put too much pressure on her "I..shit, I didn't mean to let it go this far." Okay, so that was a damn lie but I didn't want to seem like a desperate pervert.

"Shh" she leaned down, pressing a finger to my lips "I'm not mad. I just um, got startled a little bit. I wasn't expecting that kiss to be so intense, let alone you touch me and it feel…" she paused, biting her lip, a blush forming on her cheeks, making her all the more tempting.

"What did it feel like" I asked before letting my tongue lick her finger tip. She opened her mouth to respond but when I did it again, her words seemed to disappear "did it feel good Liz?" I could hear my voice deeper, lace with all the desire I had for her as I spoke "tell me" I demanded, my hands on her hips.

"It felt so good. I want…I want you to kiss me all the time, Jasper. I want this feeling of warmth" she laughed nervously "I want to forget things, even if for a little while and when I'm with you, I forget about the world out there" she glanced up towards my bedroom door "just for a little while."

If possible, I would've gotten up and danced like a fucking giddy school child. For so long I had wanted her to say the words, that she actually wanted me too in the way I wanted her.

"Just tell me what you want, Liz." I knew had little will power when it came to her and she was beginning to see it too. Grabbing my hands in her own, she laced them before leaning back down, placing our intertwined hands on either side of my face.

"I want this" she looked down on me "me and you."

"Your escape?" fuck, I'd make her forget all the pain.

She shook her head, leaning closer, her lips hovering over my ear "_our _escape, Jasper."

Fuck, this girl was going to be the death of me.

"When did you turn into this vixen, little sister?"

To that, she merely laughed before sitting up full again "I am no such thing. I just, when I'm with you, I feel these things. Things I want to share with you. But Jasper" she frowned, moving off of me so I could sit up as well "is this wrong of us?"

I knew this was coming and quite frankly, I still had no idea. I suppose to a lot people, this would be considered immoral and wrong but to us, in a life filled with cruelty and pain, it didn't seem odd at all.

"I really don't know, Liz. I think that as long as we feel it's right, who cares what others think."

"Should we you know, keep it secret?"

"I think for now, yes. Especially here at home. We can only be together like this when father and mother aren't home. At school too, you know father has eyes all over the place. If it were to get back to him…"

"You're right. Secret then?"

"Secret. Damn it, Liz you don't know how long I've wanted to kiss you, to feel your skin on mine. You're so soft and pure and I want you to always remember that. I can always make you feel better, Liz. In more ways than one" I ran a hand over her cheek and down her neck "always."

Her breathing quickened for a moment or two before calming back down.

"Come on, Liz. What do you say to taking a nap before father comes back home?"

"Are you…sure?" she seemed hesitant.

"Of course. I'm not a deep sleeper and I'll set the alarm for an hour and a half. We'll have plenty of time."

"Okay" she stood off my bed, my puzzled expression causing her to smile "I um, can't sleep with these damn tights on" she shrugged before she started tugging them down her legs in front of me before tossing them across the room. She crawled back into bed, where I was already laying on my side. She perfectly molded her back against my chest. Her head right underneath my own, I was able to take in her delectable scent while my other hand couldn't resist and began moving up and down her leg; soft, warm I wondered if she would taste just as sweet as her lips had.

Pressed tightly against her, she obviously felt me. Still semi-aroused but she didn't say anything but I could sense her curiosity.

"Yes, Liz" I leaned down, kissing her behind her ear "you did that to me, darlin'."

She nodded slowly, grabbing my hand in hers and wrapping them both around her waist "I feel safe with you" she snuggled in closer to me, our scents mingling with one another as we kept each other warm.

"I'll always keep you safe, Liz." _If it kills me, I'm going to make sure father never hurts you any more than he already has. _

We soon drifted off, welcoming both the rest and break from our daily lives. We knew that when we woke up, we'd still be in the same life, the same reality but, even for an hour or so, if I could take Liz away from this all then it was all worth it.

Truth by be told, being with her calmed me. She was like a drug, my sister. She could speak and I'd hang on to her every word. She would cry and I would feel her pain. She would kiss me and I would long to be with her completely.

The desire to be with my sister was even greater now that I had kissed her but, we would have to go slow. She was so innocent and pure that I wasn't about to pressure her into doing things she had no experience in doing. For now, the fact that she was with me, meant the fucking world.

"I'll take away the pain…" I murmured in her ear before succumbing to sleep "I promise."

And so help me God, I was going to make good on that promise.

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**Longest chapter by far and I personally loved it. What did you guys think??**

**Your thoughts are like my addiction. **


	5. Without You

**AN:I love seeing what people think of this story and for everyone still following, thanks so much! Your support means the world. **

**Thank you to my best friend & room mate, she helped me with this chapter alot!**

**As always, all I own is Liz & my plotline. **

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**Chapter 5: Without You**

**Have I been blind?  
For the first time in my life I feel I've opened up my eyes  
Since you've arrived like an angel from the sky  
I'm on a spiritual high  
So don't you ever go away  
I could never face  
Losing you would kill my faith  
In a higher place**

**Jasper**

_Lights were dim, the moonlight casting its' light on her and her alone. Slowly making her way towards me, I saw that she was trembling. She was nervous no doubt. _

"_Don't be scared Liz." Pushing some of her hair back, she smiled softy. "I'll make the pain go away." Hands came to rest on her sweater, undoing the buttons quickly, basking in each of inch of skin that was becoming exposed with each movement. _

"_Jasper," her hands came to a rest on top of mine "I love you." It was barely above a whisper but I heard her loud and clear. "Make me forget, make me yours." _

_Hands tore at each other's clothing, removing them and tossing them every which way. Taking her, I pushed her back on the bed allowing my hands to travel over her every curve of her body. _

_Excitement built and even though we were nervous, I knew that this is what we needed to forget everything around us. One more glance into her eyes, I…_

_Beep…beep…_ Go away! _Beep…beep. _

Oh, damn it all to hell! My eyes snapped open, glaring over at the alarm clock that had awakened me from such an amazing dream. Too amazing perhaps because looking down, I found myself to be in a bit of a comprising position that would probably not go over well with Liz.

The alarm finally shutting up, I untangled myself from her warm embrace, quickly making my way towards the bathroom, grabbing a change of clothes on the way. I knew it'd be best if I took care of my problem, but something inside didn't want me to. No, I was craving Liz and one day, I would have her. So instead I opted for cold water and within minutes, I was feeling not so strained. Throwing on my jeans and t-shirt, I knew it was getting closer to the hour that mom and father were due back and I had a shit load of things to do in the backyard from yesterday and I needed to do at least some it before he got back.

However, every single thought about father and what I needed to do completely vanished when I walked back into the room to find Liz laying on her side, arms wrapped tightly around my pillow, her gaze fixated on the wall. Her skirt, perhaps from the all the tossing and turning, had risen up a bit, flashing me a bit of those legs of hers. Bare, I wanted my hands, my lips all over them.

"Jasper?" That gentle, pure voice called me. She looked scared as she looked at me and I was immediately back in the bed with her.

"I thought it was a dream." She blushed innocently. "I thought I had dreamt that kiss, falling asleep in here with you."

"Liz, I assure you it was no dream." Pressing my lips to hers, I let her curl back on the bed with me, her head resting on me.

"Good because I'd hate for it to be a dream." Her hand danced lazily across my chest. Peering over at my nightstand, the clock was flashing two thirty and I knew that the longer I stayed here with Liz, the more likely I was to not ever get any work done.

"I don't want to leave." To perhaps prove her point, she clung to me a bit tighter, one of her legs resting on mine. "I slept so comfortably in here with you. I wish we could do this every day."

"So do I, Liz. So do I." We both knew that wasn't a possibility however. With father's ever present patrols, who knew when and if he would walk into one of our rooms in the middle of the night?

"Do you think we can sleep just a little bit longer?" She was already yawning, burying her face in my chest.

"Liz, we really shouldn't." I began but didn't finish when she shifted again, pressing herself close and tighter against me. A feeling that I never wanted to be without, I caved almost instantly. I didn't know when he would get to be like this again and I wanted to savor it as much as she did. My silence was seen as an agreement so rolled over a tiny bit, resetting the alarm to ring in an hour. When she did, her skirt rode up a little bit more and gave me a glimpse of the back of her legs. Temptation was too great this time and before she rolled back, my hand crept up a tiny bit up her thigh, softly rubbing the skin there. My hand wasn't so far up that I was touching her ass, but it was still on uncharted territory.

Gasping in surprise more than anger, she quickly rolled back over, a hint of amusement in her eyes. "Am I going to have to put those tights back on?" My hand lingering now on her knee, I shook my head as I looked down at her. I hadn't seen Liz so carefree in a long time and it was such an amazing feeling, to know that she could be this way with me and only me. Course, she could act this way with Edward too, but she was always worrying about protecting Edward that she always seemed to forget about herself. All the more reason for me to make her smile either out of happiness or pleasure, I was willing to give her both.

"I couldn't resist." I shrugged. "You truly are something to look at Liz."

The words didn't sound wrong in my mind and yet when I said them, her smile faded and she looked down for a few seconds. "Why does he look at me that way?"

I didn't understand.

"Why does _he _look at me that way?" She clarified and I knew then who she was talking about.

"Father's sick and perverse." I rubbed her leg gently in hopes of calming her down. "He has no right to look at you in the way he does, Liz. If I could, I'd make sure he never did it again. I know how uncomfortable that makes you feel." Realizing that I was telling her this while at the same time, letting my hands roam freely over her leg, I pulled away quickly, frowning. "Which makes me a fucking contradiction." I sat up further, moving a few inches away from her.

"You…what?" She seemed confused. "I didn't mean you Jasper. I was talking about father." She ducked her head, cheeks reddening with embarrassment. "I _like _it when you touch me Jasper. You make me feel wanted and important instead of some object that someone stares at whenever they feel like it."

"Liz," I sighed moving back closer to her "I will _never _treat you the way he does do you understand me?"

Placing her hand on my cheek, she nodded. "I know Jasper. You're nothing like him. I trust you, you'd never hurt me."

Damn straight I'd never hurt her. This girl was my life, more so now than ever before. Without my sister, without Liz at my side, life wouldn't be as bright. Well, as bright as it could get in this shitty situation.

"If I ever do something though Liz that makes you uncomfortable, you have to tell me ok?"

"I will."

"I'll admit Liz, sometimes when you're around me I want to keep you at my side at all times. I want to keep you safe, want my lips on you…" Trailing off when a tiny smile graced her lips, I lost train of thought for a second. "Then there are times like these, when you look at me like that, that I just can't resist temptation." Tilting her head, looking at me, I cupped her cheek with my hand before brushing my lips against hers once more. "These lips are my weakness, I want them always." Lips still pressed together, she wound her hands in my hair gently, tugging me down closer to her. I liked it when Liz got like this. I loved when she let go, and just went with it.

Stretching out further on the bed, I propped myself over her, resting on one hand while I moved lower, resting my face in the crook of her neck. By reflex, she tilted her head up and to the side a little bit when I brushed my lips against her throat. Her pulse seemed to immediately quicken when I lightly touched her with my tongue, barely skimming the warm skin.

"Jasper," she sighed breathlessly "we're supposed to be going back to sleep." She writhed underneath me when I pressed one more kiss to her throat.

"You're right." I moved up off over her, resting on my back. "Otherwise, I might be liable to do something highly inappropriate to you."

"Do you really think of me that way?" She turned on her side and watched me with wary eyes. "Do you really find me that…_attractive_?" The way she said the word sounded foreign coming out of her mouth, as if she had never said it before.

"I think you're more than just attractive Liz, but I'm afraid if I tell you all the things you do to me, you might think I'm some sort of pervert or something."

She nodded. "I understand. Well, I'm glad that whatever it is you think of me is good?"

"Very good." I urged her to come closer, let me hold her while we attempted to get another hour of sleep in. While we may not have been tired at that very moment, we knew that being together this way, would make up for the lack of sleep we got during any normal nights when we weren't together. Besides, having her close me meant she was safe for the time being. While I physically may not be doing anything while she was with me, it still gave me peace of mind knowing that I could see her safe first hand. Though, there was part of that wanted nothing more than to attack father every time he laid a hand on Liz. I knew I couldn't, I wouldn't do such a thing. Why, because I was fucking coward. No, more than that. If I did, it was very likely that both Liz and Edward would suffer whatever consequence I'd face too and that was the last thing I wanted. No, if anything, I wanted to spare them more pain not bring more to them.

Though not tired in the slightest, I felt myself drifting off rather quickly. The smell of the perfume Liz wore and the way she was breathing steadily across my neck was all the calm I needed. Tightening my grip on her, her hand encircled my waist as she clung to me, nestling closer to me.

Soon as I shut my eyes, I was once again greeted with the same dream as earlier. Only this time, I tried not to let it affect me physically as it did earlier. I kept telling myself that maybe one day, my dream of being with Liz, engaging in such intimate activities, would come true.

A man could only hope right?

********

I awoke, not to the sound of the alarm clock, but rather to the sound of someone swinging the door open quickly, it gently slamming against the wall. I sat up first, Liz being a deeper sleeper than I was.

"Edward, what is it?" His eyes were a bit frantic as he took the two of us in.

"They're here, Jasper." His was low. "They're here."

"Fuck." I glanced over at the alarm, it now reading four fifteen. We had overslept only forty five minutes, but we were in deep shit now. "Liz." I gently nudged her. "Liz, wake up." Shaking her again, her eyes snapped open, staring at me with confusion.

"I started dinner Liz." Edward came closer, helping Liz stand up. "You should really be in the kitchen though." Realization set in finally and she was up quickly, slipping her shoes on while Edward helped smooth out her skirt and hair. Looking acceptable, she practically took the stairs two at a time so she would be in the kitchen by the time the front door opened.

Standing, I kicked her tights under my bed before grabbing my shoes and heading towards the backyard. I had so much to do and hadn't done any of it. I knew father was going to be pissed, but maybe if I looked like I was doing something, it wouldn't be too bad. At least, that was the lie I kept telling myself.

Once in the backyard, I could see Liz standing in the kitchen, quickly pulling her hair into a ponytail as she pulled things out of the refrigerator to make a salad. Edward had really saved our asses because not five minutes later, the front door opened and I could hear our parents walking inside.

"Eliza!" Even though closed doors, I could still hear our father yell. "Come, now!" She jumped at his command, but promptly walked out towards the living room, returning only moments later, a startled expression on her face. Glancing up from the work I was doing, my eyes locked with hers as she stood in front of the cabinets, pulling out a glass. I watched as her lips moved quickly in what seemed to be the word 'drunk.'

Well shit this was just great. Father hadn't been intoxicated in awhile. At least, not while he was at home. Usually father was only a social drinker, drinking while out with his colleagues at events or at someone else's house for dinner. The last time he had been drunk while at home was the night that Liz got that scar on her wrist. No wonder she seemed nervous when she looked at me.

Quickly grabbing some ice, she made her way back into the dining room to where father's liquor was. It was quite tragic, to think that seventeen, Liz knew how to fix father's favorite drink. Though I'm sure it wouldn't be as sad if we lived in a normal house where a simple drink didn't have the potential to turn dangerous.

I spent fifteen more minutes out in the yard, making it look like I had done some more yard work before going back inside. Liz was finishing dinner over the stove while I washed my hands and leaning against the counter watching her. She was silent, preparing dinner like she always did. It was like I didn't even exist as she moved about the kitchen and I wasn't sure if that was a good sign. She seemed to be cutting herself off from the current situation. Though she was there physically, mentally she was perhaps elsewhere.

When she came closer to the sink, finishing the salad, I gently gripped her arm and looked at her.

"I'm scared Jasper." She murmured quickly. "He's extremely drunk."

"He won't hurt you." I pulled her closer to me, my lips moving quickly near her ear. "I promise you Liz. He'll eat dinner and then go pass out. We just have to make it through dinner and we'll be okay the rest of the night."

Nodding, I let her go as she grabbed plates and began serving the food on them. As I walked out towards the dining room, father and mother were already seated at the table. I greeted father, eying his current state before moving towards my mother, kissing her cheek. Resting my hand on her shoulder gently, she reached her hand up and squeezed mine. It was my silent way of asking if she was hurt in any way. If she touched my hand, she was fine. If she didn't, that meant father had harmed her. We all had little ways of communicating with each other.

"Did you finish the yard Jasper?" Father asked right away as I sat down, across from Edward.

"I worked on it some more father."

"That's not what I asked."

"I'm nearly done, but it was getting dark." That was my feeble excuse.

He scoffed, taking a long mouthful of his drink, finishing it. "It better be done before you leave for school tomorrow Jasper." I nodded, that wasn't so bad. I had done it before. "Where the hell is you sister?" He glanced around, the ice in his glass swishing around. Almost on cue, Liz appeared, serving father and mother first. "About time." He watched her as she walked in and out of the room. I hated the way he was staring at her. His eyes lingered on her bare legs as she sat down beside Edward, the room going silent for a few moments.

Before long, father began to ramble in his drunken state about all the 'idiotic' thing he had heard today while he was out. We all listened, but didn't say anything. It was hard to understand half the things he said anyways. Mother was the only who spoke, only so it didn't seem as though father was talking to himself. He hated that with a passion and he would endure mother's comments, not any of ours. He'd claim we were too incompetent to understand anything. Bullshit, but we didn't say anything.

Glancing up, both Edward and Liz were eating in silence. Taking a chance, I stretched my leg out a bit further underneath the table, in hopes of getting a small smile out of Liz by maybe brushing my leg against hers.

Apparently, I have horrible fucking aim. I grazed someone, but it wasn't Liz. Instead of soft, bare legs I came in contact with denim clad legs. Pulling away quickly, Edward shot me an odd glance from across the table, his eyes lifting a fraction when he felt me. Thankfully, my brother had a good sense of humor and brushed it off. I on the other hand was completely mortified. Much as I love my brother, I'd never hit on him. Casting a glance towards Liz, she seemed to know what had just happened and her lips had twitched up a little bit as she tried to hide her smile.

Well hell, at least I got her to smile a little bit at my expense.

"Eliza!" Father broke all contact and Liz froze. "What the hell are you smiling about young lady?"

She shook her head. "Nothing father."

"Good now," he raised his empty glass at her "go fix me another drink, now." She stood quickly, taking the glass gingerly from his hands, disappearing into the kitchen and back in what felt like seconds. With her back towards the table, she poured more of the dark liquor into the glass. Watching from the corner of my eye, I saw that father had shifted in his seat, his eyes raking up her legs.

When Liz turned around, she was a bit startled to see him watching her so openly. Handing him the glass, he set it down quickly before grabbing her hand in his.

"What the fuck is that young lady?" He hissed, bringing her closer down towards him. When she didn't respond, he twisted her arm a bit and she whimpered quietly. "What is it?" He repeated.

"I..I don't know." She shook her head and my heart sank. Gripping her tighter, his hand moved up to her neck, moving over whatever it was.

"Have you been seeing a boy Eliza? Have you!" Twisting her arm again, she winced.

"No father, I swear."

"Then how do you explain that thing on your neck!"

Then it hit me. Fuck, fuck! I had screwed in a major way. It dawned a second later with Liz too, her eyes widening a fraction. "It's nothing father, I promise. I…I burnt myself with the curling iron earlier, that's all."

Whether due to his drunken stupor or him actually believing it, he let her arm go, allowing her to stand up fully again. "Good because no man is to ever look at you in that manner, Eliza." His hand landed on her leg and I knew what was coming before he even did it. Apparently, he had no shame in feeling up his step daughter, our sister in front of everyone. "No man." He repeated, his hand brushing her skirt before he pinched her roughly, in the exact same spot where she had her other bruise. Biting her lip, she remained silent. Moving an inch, I felt Edward kick me under the table, shaking his head.

As much as I knew not to, I couldn't just let her endure this any longer. I needed to shift father's attention and there was only one way. His hand barely moving from her soft skin, I moved my hand quickly, tipping father's fresh drink all over his designer pants.

Moving almost in a blink of an eye, he was up on his feet, Liz being pushed away from him as he glared down at me. "Damn it!" he hissed, hand banging on the table, causing all the plates to rattle. His hand grabbed my upper arm roughly, practically throwing me down to the ground. I could've fought back I suppose, but it would've been to no avail. As strong as I am, father is so much stronger.

"Clean this up, now!" He stood over me, watching as I placed the ice in the glass, placing it back on the table. I had no towel to clean up the spilled alcohol so I used what I had. Kneeling, I peeled off the t-shirt I was wearing before I began soaking up as much as the liquid as I possibly could.

I didn't do it fast enough I quickly discovered when with one swift movement, I felt his foot coming in contact with my side. It hurt like a motherfucker, but I didn't say a word and just continued cleaning it as much as possible. Still not moving fast enough, he kicked me again and this time, I prayed that he wouldn't break anything because he sure as hell wouldn't let me go to the doctor and I wasn't about to live some broken ribs. I had already been down that road before.

"Fucking pathetic." He spat me. "I'm done with all this shit." He slurred, moving away from me, mumbling something to our mother who quickly agreed. He stomped off, trudging up the stairs rather slowly. I remained on the ground because I was afraid of moving, knowing that it was going to hurt like a bitch when I did.

"Jasper, honey." Mother was at my side as soon as the door closed. "Let me look darling."

"I'm fine." I said, my teeth clenched together in pain. "Really mom, it's fine. No worse than any other time."

"Let me at least get you some ice." She stood quickly, heading towards the kitchen. Edward was still sitting at the table, his face emotionless as he watched. I dreaded looking to my left, knowing I'd meet Liz's glare. I did it anyway, needing to see that she was alright.

She wasn't alright though. Her face was twisted in pain as she stood there and watched me, guilt written all over her face as she continued to stare. Tear were forming in the corner of her eyes, her mouth opening to say something…

"Here sweetie." Mother was back, handing me a towel wrapped in ice along with two pain pills. "Are you sure you don't need…"

"No mom." I shook my head and in my attempts to prove I was strong, I stood up slowly, clutching the chair with one hand as I steadied myself. "It'll just a bruise, nothing life threatening." I tried to lighten the situation but no one seemed relaxed one bit.

"I have to go up there before he realizes I'm gone." She muttered quickly. Kissing my forehead, she walked quickly up the stairs.

"Jasper," Liz stepped up to me hesitantly "let me help you."

As much as it pained me, I shook my head. "Did you not hear me? I'm fine, Liz." Grabbing the ice, I brushed past her slowly, walking up the stairs at a snail's pace.

I had acted like a jackass with her just now, but I didn't want her to see me like this. It was best to deal with this alone. I didn't want her to have to watch me wince and curse in pain all night. It wasn't fair to her.

Finally reaching my room, I closed my door and sat on my bed, the pain making my head spin. Father had one hell of a kick that's for sure.

Pressing my already bruising side, I hissed in pain. It was going to be a rough week, I just knew it.

Even though I could barely breathe, let alone move properly a part of me knew that I wouldn't have done anything differently. I promised to keep Liz safe and damn it, I would whatever it took.

Without Liz, I had nothing. If me getting hurt was what it took this time to keep her safe from father's perverse touches and glances then so be it because without that girl, I couldn't breathe.

_She _was my reason for enduring this.

She was my reason for everything.

I'd give my sister anything, I'd lay down my life if it meant she'd be protected.

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**What'd you think? Let me know! **


	6. Stand by Your Man

**AN: Thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter, it truly keeps me motivated. **

**I have to thank my best friend, she helped me in a MAJOR way with this chapter! You're the best dear!**

**As always, I just own Liz. **

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_**Chapter 6: Stand by Your Man**_

_**You'll have bad times  
And he'll have good times  
Doing things that you don't understand  
But if you love him you'll forgive him  
Even though he's hard to understand  
And if you love him  
Oh be proud of him  
'Cause after all he's just a man  
Stand by your man  
Give him two arms to cling to  
And something warm to come to  
When nights are cold and lonely  
Stand by your man**_

**Liz**

It had been hours since father's latest tirade. Neither of us had expected him to come home intoxicated, let alone unleash his anger the way he did on Jasper. Sadly, it wasn't too unpredictable.

Having to watch father hit Jasper with something other than his hand was unbearable. I wanted to run to him, hold him when he fell to his knees, but I knew I couldn't. It was bad enough we all had to witness it, but for someone to respond so openly to it, we'd suffer father's wrath too.

Mother had long since gone to her room, knowing that if she wasn't in bed when father woke up hungover, it wouldn't be good. If she was there, he'd merely wrap his arms around her before passing out again. It wasn't ideal, but she wouldn't be hurt if she was there and that was all that mattered. Edward and I silently cleaned the kitchen while Jasper retreated to his room. As much as he had taken care of me, he didn't like anyone taking care of him. He was a bit a martyr, always wanting to endure alone.

"Liz," Edward had called my attention earlier "you need to ice your leg a bit."

I knew I did, but I wasn't making any attempt to do it. It hurt like hell, being as father decided to pinch me in the exact same place as Friday. That meant it was going to take twice as long for the bruise to go away.

"I don't have time for that…" Sighing, my brother cut me off before I could finish my statement. He turned me around to face him, already holding the ice in his hand. I could do nothing to stop him then. Edward was a rather stubborn person. I loved him, but he was still stubborn as hell.

"Come, sit." Taking my sore arm gently, I sat on one of the wooden chairs at the kitchen table. Kneeling in front of me, he placed his hand on my knee, eyes looking up to meet mine. I knew he was asking if he could continue. I had no objection, I knew Edward would never hurt me. Pushing my skirt up a few inches, he moved in closer so that was in between my legs somewhat. I looked out the window as I felt his hand touch the bruise softly and cringed when he placed the ice on it. As much as it hurt, the coolness felt good on my leg.

"He's sick," he murmured "he shouldn't touch you like that, _ever_."

"It's fine Edward. You and I both know if it wasn't for Jasper things would've been worse." Touching the top of his head, I tried to soothe him a bit. He wanted more and leaned his head on my non injured leg and tried to steady his breathing.

I always knew what to do to calm Edward down. I wish I could do the same for Jasper. It was clear that my feelings for him ran deeper than they did for Edward. No, that wasn't true. The feelings for my brothers were different, but I still loved them same. In my own way of course.

After Edward helped me, we turned out all the lights and headed up stairs. He kissed my forehead before retreating to his room. I knew he was going to probably be writing for the next couple hours and as much I would've loved to have some company, I knew this was his alone time to try and clear his mind and forget. So, I let him go.

That was two hours ago. I had been sitting in my room for the past two hours, watching the numbers on my alarm clock change and flash back at me. I had changed, shorts and a sweatshirt and just waited. I didn't know how to go about this. Usually, as much as I hated it, I let Jasper be. We all dealt with things in our own way, but after this afternoon I would've thought that things would be different.

Jasper had gone on about how he would keep me safe and be my escape. Call me crazy, I thought it would go both ways. He'd be there for me and vice versa.

Finally, around eleven I heard a door open and shut quickly and the sound of someone walking downstairs and out the back door. My window faced the backyard and I just had to look. It was Jasper, walking out across the lawn rather slowly, gripping his side in pain. My heart ached for him and I quickly swapped my shorts for jeans and raced out there to join him. By the time I did, he was sitting on the swing, motionless.

Growing up, I had loved this swing. It was one of the things that Jasper's mother had added to the house and it still remained. We hardly sat on it anymore, there never being time to just...sit. Approaching him, he didn't turn to look at me. When I stood before him, his eyes remained glued to the grass in front of him. I felt myself sinking to my knees, my hands coming to rest on the hem of his black long sleeve shirt. I watched him as I pushed it up slowly, gauging his reaction. He didn't say anything, but his eyes were on me now. Even in the dark, I was still able to make out the large bruise that was forming on his side, a little bit above his hip. My fingers skimmed over it softly and he hissed, fingers clenching the edge of the swing tightly.

"Jasper," I leaned in closer, pressing my lips against his bruise. Though kisses wouldn't make it better, I was just trying to help. "I'm...I'm so sorry, this is all my fault."

That statement got a reaction. Moving one of his hands, he lifted my face to look at him. "Don't, Liz. I won't allow it." One more kiss and I was up, sitting on his non-bruised side. He immediately brought me closer to him, his arm wrapped around me tightly. Though he didn't say it, I knew he was letting me comfort him somehow. This, me being here with him, was helping him.

"Jasper what were you thinking?"

His grip tightened. "It was the only thing I could think of."

"But why? I would've been fine."

"No, no you wouldn't. I saw how he was staring at you. The sick bastard. I couldn't stand it Liz, it was fucking driving me insane the way his eyes lingered on your legs, the way he touched you."

"He said no other man was allowed to touch me." I added to his long list. "It made me sick to my stomach, Jasper. Was he implying that…" I couldn't finish, I was too scared.

"I'd kill him before he even thought about touching you in that manner." He growled, his voice strained. "I'd fucking kill him."

"Jasper, no." I looked up at him. He was talking nonsense now. There was no way in hell he could even try to do something like that to father. Not because he didn't deserve it because God knows he did, but if Jasper were to do something there'd be great consequences. He could go to jail or even worst, he could end up…_dead._ "I won't let you risk your life for me, Jasper. It's not right, not fair."

"And letting him continue is fair? It's not Liz. Everything's gotten so damn twisted around here over the past couple years. I don't know how much more of it I can take. Him hitting me I can take, but I can't stand to see him hit you, Edward and mom."

A lump rose in my throat. "Me either. I hate it when any of you get hurt."

"I told you that I would protect you Liz and I meant it. I wouldn't think twice before putting my life before yours."

Gasping, I turned fully, the swing swaying beneath us. Grabbing his face in my hands, I kept my eyes locked on his. "Don't you _ever _say something like to me! I will not let you be so…so stubborn and stupid! God," I let my hand drop to my lap "what is this Jasper? Why us??"

Looking down and then lifting my head up, my tears that I had been trying to hide flowed freely down my cheeks.

"I wish I knew," he shrugged in defeat "I really wish I could just make it all stop, Liz. You have to know though, I will do anything it takes."

God, he was so stubborn sometimes. "No, you will not and while we're on the topic of do whatever it takes…you need to let me help you Jasper. You promise me all these things and yet, you won't let me be there for you?"

He cringed. He knew I had got him there. "I hate you seeing me like this Liz. I don't want to hurt…"

"No," I wasn't spending all night doing this with him "It would hurt me if you didn't let me help you. You help me, I help you. Plain and simple."

"You're not letting me change that are you?"

I smiled softly. "No chance in hell."

He winced in pain a bit as he reached for me. "Fine, I promise. Shit Liz, why are you so good to me?"

"Because even though you do things that don't make sense sometimes, I want to be the person you can come to. The sooner you see that, the better. I'm not going anywhere."

"Neither am I." I turned closer wanting to kiss his cheek or something, but my attention was pulled away by something else. With the moon being our only light, I made out the faint line over his right eye. It was something that had always been there, something I always wondered about.

"Jasper," I reached up, tracing my fingers over his scar "where did you get this from?"

I thought he'd grow upset, but much to my relief and shock he didn't. Instead, he smiled a bit. "I got it right here."

I didn't understand. "Right here where?"

"A few weeks after my mother got this swing put in, I was out here standing on it. She warned me not to, but I did it anyways. I swung back and forth as fast as I could. It was fun," he laughed lightly at the memory "that is, until I fell off. Fell flat on my face, on the tree roots." He shrugged. "I was five, and I wanted to fly."

I sighed. That had to be quite possibly the cutest thing I had ever heard. At least, as weird as it sounded, it was a somewhat pleasant memory. It had been caused by childhood adventures and not by violence.

"Do you remember your mother?" He hardly ever talked about her. All I knew was that she died when he was six. I lost my mother when I was five.

"Sometimes, after father's done something horrible to one of us, I think about her. I don't remember a lot about her, but I remember how she loved baking and would always play with me in the backyard. Little things like that, they help me get through the nights sometimes."

"I think of my mother as my guardian angel, always watching over me."

Jasper didn't answer me. I knew that his faith wasn't so strong as mine was and that was okay. "Do you think your mom's an angel Jasper?"

"I know she is." He answered softly. "She was an angel on Earth so I wouldn't expect her to be anything less in the afterlife."

I kissed over his right eye gently before sitting back and curling into his side. "They have to be protecting us somehow. Otherwise, things would be way worse. Right?"

"Maybe, I'm not so sure."

"I remember my mother, she would always have music playing while she cleaned or cooked and we would dance around, just us girls. That and she always smelled like flowers and wore red lipstick."

"Do you miss her?"

"Yes, but I was really young she died. I'll always love her and she's always going to be my real mother, but she's a memory and Esme is my actual mother? Is that wrong of me to think that?"

"No," he squeezed my shoulders "I feel the same. I only remember a few things about _my _mother so to me, Esme's been the only real mother figure in my life."

"She's one of a kind, _our _mother."

"That she is."

Our conversation soon fell silent as we sat outside until the early morning. Even though we had school, neither of us wanted to go back inside. However, it got colder and we needed to get at least a few hours of sleep. I wanted to stay with Jasper, make sure he was okay during the night but he assured me he'd be fine. That and he knew that if I were to stay with him, we'd both probably oversleep and that was not a good thing. I reluctantly let him go and headed back towards my room. I was so exhausted that I collapsed on my bed still wearing my jeans and was soon fast asleep.

*********

Morning, as always, came too quickly for me. I somehow found the will to get up and take a shower before I needed to be downstairs. Thankfully, there wasn't a bruise on my arm so the only one I had to worry about was the one my leg and cheek. The one on my face wasn't so bad, but it was still a challenge to cover some of it up. I knew I'd have to explain either way, but at least it didn't look too bad.

I made my way into the kitchen ten minutes before father trudged in. I made sure his coffee was extra strong, being as he still looked hung-over. He barely touched his eggs, but he didn't say anything about it. When I came to the table to give him his second cup of coffee, his eyes flickered to my cheek for a second. He didn't say anything though, but he for a second looked nervous. I don't know why, it's not like he hadn't hit me someplace visible before. Hell, he hadn't even hit me. Jasper had.

Not saying much, I was able to relax after he and mother left. Making my way back upstairs, I checked in on Edward. He was hastily trying to finish his Spanish homework. He was an extremely good student, but he was a bit of a procrastinator sometimes.

Leaving him to finish, I walked towards Jasper's room. His door was slightly ajar so I peeked in. Frowning, I opened the door fully when I saw him standing near his dresser, only half dressed. Hearing me, he turned around to look at me.

"Can't decide what to wear?" I joked lightly walking inside.

"My side hurts like a bitch." He grumbled and my smile disappeared. I walked up beside him, slightly pushing him out the way as I rummaged through his collection of shirts. I knew it would hurt too much to wear a regular t-shirt so I grabbed a dark blue button down he could wear.

"Here, let me help you." I held out the shirt for him and he slowly slipped his arms in. I did the rest. Adjusting it up over his shoulders, I worked on the buttons next. My eyes remained fixated on my hands as I tried to button them as quickly as possible without staring too much at my brother. He seemed to enjoy my torture, but he didn't say anything. When I was done, I left the top two undone. Grabbing my hand, he turned it so that he could kiss my palm; his silent thank you to me. Honestly, I was more than happy to help him.

"You're amazing." Lacing our hands, he looked at them. "Fuck, I wish I could show everyone that you were mine."

I blushed. _Mine_. It sounded so possessive and sensual that I felt that strange sensation in my stomach again. Trying to ignore it, I just smiled and told him we needed to go to school.

School was just another Monday. I went about all my classes, taking notes and turning in homework. Some people stared, but no one asked about the bruise on my face.

At lunch, Jasper told us how he got out of participating in PE because of the dark circles under his eyes.

"He said it looked like I had a rough weekend." He smirked and laughed. "If only he knew." I didn't think his comment was funny, but I just nodded anyways as I ate.

Jasper had an odd sense of humor sometimes and even though I didn't really get it, I just let him. For all I knew, this was one of his ways that he dealed so who was I to judge?

Walking from the cafeteria to our class after lunch, Jasper and I always walked side by side in silence. There was never any need for us to say anything, it was a comfortable silence.

Passing through the crowds, we made our way into the class room, a few minutes to spare before the bell rang.

Sitting, I saw from the corner of my eye someone coming up to our table, stopping right beside me.

"Hey Eliza," I looked up, a bit stunned that someone was talking to me. "how are you?" Taking a closer look I saw that it was Jacob, the new student who just transferred here, smiling down at me.

"Um, I'm fine thank you." I felt immediately self conscious with the way he was looking at me. Though it had started to fade already, my bruise was still a bit noticeable. "How are you?" Though I didn't know him, there was no reason for me to be rude.

"Better now." Placing his hands on the table, he leaned down closer. "Especially since I'm talking to you."

From beside me, I heard a scoff. "So," he ignored my brother "are you...um, busy tonight?"

That threw me for a loop. "Excuse me?"

"Well, I'm new here so I was hoping a beautiful girl like you could show me around, maybe get some dinner?"

"Jacob," I took a deep breath, "I...I'm sorry, I just can't do that."

Shock was evident across his face. Clearly, he wasn't used to being rejected. "And why not, Eliza? Don't you want to have a bit of fun?" Before I knew it, his hand had reached out and ran across my non-bruised cheek. "We could have so much fun, you and I." He smiled again, so warm and friendly that I blushed a tiny bit, wondering why this guy was giving me so much attention.

Though, with his hand on me, something threw up a red flag and I felt myself shifting in my chair, my shoulders being gripped tightly.

"Back...away from her." Jasper's voice was low, cold and it sent a shiver down my spine. Jacob's eyes flickered behind me to my brother, a confused look on his face.

"You're taking the over protective big brother role a bit too much to heart aren't you man? I'm sure your sister can make decisions all on her own, right..._Liz?_" I eyed him, no one called me that other than my brothers. In a blink of an eye, Jasper was up, standing face to face with Jacob.

"Who the hell do you think you are?" He inched closer to him. "I said, get away from her." Sitting between the two of them, I felt fear surge through me. Jasper was strong, but Jacob was built like a football player; tall, muscular with a smug smile tugging the corners of his lips. It was that smile that told me that Jacob wanted this, he wanted to fight Jasper right here and now. He was taunting him.

It was odd, being as neither Jasper nor Jacob knew each other so there was no reason for them to be fighting.

"Jasper, no." I squeaked, standing up quickly between the two boys. "Jacob I'm sure you're a nice guy and all, but I really can't go out with you tonight or any night. I just can't."

With a wink, he pushed some of my hair back, his smile fading when he saw my bruise. "What happened to you?" For a second, he sounded genuinely concerned.

Frantically moving my hair back, I frowned. "Nothing, I fell that's all." He didn't buy it and he even went as far to stare over at Jasper.

"This shit's too complicated for me. You're beautiful Eliza, but I don't know what kind of stuff you're into." Stunned by his comment, I slumped back in my seat, not saying another word. The boys' intense stare down broke as the bell rang and Jasper sat back down and Jacob retreated back to his desk.

We had a substitute thankfully which meant we'd be watching another film.

"Fucking asshole." I heard my brother mutter as the lights went down and the movie started. I didn't answer him, but rather just sat there motionless. I didn't know what to do. I felt both scared and insulted by Jacob's comment. I didn't know what he had meant by it, but it was obvious that Jasper didn't like him talking to me in such a manner. I could tell by his posture, he was angry. Hands clasped together, his head was resting on them with his eyes shut as he took deep, calming breaths. Without realizing it, I reached out to try and take his hand, but he pulled away from me. His entire body was tense and he was staring straight ahead of him, not saying a word. The swell of tears that threatened to spill over were pushed back as I tried to find reason as to why he was acting like this. I came up short.

What the film was about, I wasn't exactly sure. Though my eyes were glued to it, my mind was elsewhere.

Class was nearly over, the lights still down when I felt it. Light at first, but almost in a matter of seconds Jasper had laid his head down on the table and had reached out and took my hand. I didn't respond to him, for fear that this was all in my mind, but when I felt him turn my hand up to face him I knew this was no dream. Though we were in a dimly lit classroom, there was a risk being taken here. Especially when I felt him moving her fingers up and down my palm, over my wrist in little patterns. Curiosity finally got the best of me and I finally turned to glance at my brother, coming to find him staring at me as well. There was such an intense anger in his eyes that it frightened me a bit. I was scared he was either going to snap or try and kiss me. As much as I wanted him to do the latter, I knew we couldn't. We were in school and this was supposed to be a secret.

I squeezed his hand, trying to calm him, but he took it the wrong way. Instead of him stopping, he scooted his chair closer to mine, my leg now touching his. Dropping our clasped hands, he rested it on my legs, continuing his trail of patterns up and down my thigh. I wanted him to continue, touch me forever but I knew this was wrong. For him to be acting this way in a classroom full of our peers, we were bound to get caught.

"Jasper," my breathing hitched when he moved higher, grazing the bottom of my sweatshirt, his fingers coming in contact with my side "stop." He didn't listen to me so I did the only thing I could; I moved away. He wasn't happy in the slightest, as indicated in the clenching of his fists at his sides.

The bell rang not a minute later, the lights turning on right after. Sighing in relief, I got up slowly, waiting for Jasper to join me. He stood silently and without a word, he walked past me. Not too fast that he was avoiding me but it felt all the same. Side by side we walked, neither of us saying anything as we collected our books and headed towards the parking lot to meet Edward. Trailing a little behind him, my eyes scanned the parking lot hoping that there'd be no sign of Jacob. Given the chance, I know that both boys would try to finish what had been started in the classroom. They were typical guys, but we couldn't afford an altercation. There was no sign of him and no one else seemed to be staring this way which was good. So consumed with looking around, I didn't notice Jasper stop dead in his tracks and I ran right into him.

"Fucking hell." He muttered under his breath. Standing on my toes, I peered around him to see what he was staring at. My eyes widened at the sight, but before I could attempt to stop him, he was already crossing the lot, straight towards where Edward was. Already riled up, who knew what Jasper was about to do.

I walked as quickly as I could to try and stop him, but I was too late.

"What the hell are you doing Edward?" Jasper's voice was barely audible in the parking lot full of students. I reached them, placed a hand on Jasper's shoulder but he didn't even notice me.

"Jasper, what…are you okay?" Edward seemed completely confused. Looking up, I saw that my brother was talking to someone while he had been waiting for us.

Well, not just anyone. I knew who it was. His name was James and he was in Edward and I's Spanish class. He was a nice guy, but he kept to himself a lot; much like Edward. From the looks of things, it had been more than a friendly chat. If anything, it looked like they had been flirting. While it didn't bother me in the slightest, Jasper looked like he was about to snap at someone.

"Get in the car Edward, we have to go."

"Your brother and I were just talking." I bit my lip when James spoke softly, trying to defend his actions. Clearly, he didn't know Jasper.

"You stay the hell away from him." The coldness in Jasper's voice seemed to scare off James and he was soon walking across the lot, glancing back at Edward quickly with a worried expression. In return Edward offered him a tiny smile. While it caused a bit of happiness to flow through me, it did not go over well with Jasper.

"Car, _now_." He grabbed the keys from Edward and slid in the driver's seat. Edward got in the back right away so I sat up front.

It was becoming very clear that whatever it was that was plaguing Jasper's mind, he was taking it out on whoever crossed his path. He was angry, that much was evident. Mad at what or whom, I couldn't exactly pinpoint.

All I knew is that as soon as I got him home, I would have to do something to help calm him down before father got home because god only knows that wouldn't end up good.

No matter what was going on in his mind, I was going to stand by him. Even though he was doing some things that didn't exactly make sense, I was going to be there to help him. He could fight all he wanted to, but I wasn't leaving.

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**To say there's something bothering Jasper would be an understatement. Jake and James showed up this chapter, one of which will have a bigger, more influential part later on. **

**Jasper & Liz moments make me smile.  
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**Your reviews keep me inspired!  
**


	7. Don't Wanna Be Torn

**AN: Thanks again to everyone who reviewed last chapter and has added this story to their alerts and faves. **

**This chapter went down a different path than I originally intended, but that's what happens when your Jasper decides to have three different personalities. **

**Thank you Lindsey for helping me with this chapter! You're the best!  
**

**As always, all I own is Liz. I'll gladly take Jasper though. **

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****Chapter 7: Don't Wanna Be Torn**

**I thought you said it was easy,  
Listening to your heart.  
I thought you said I'd be okay,  
So why am I'm breaking apart?  
Don't wanna be torn  
Don't make me have to choose between  
What I want  
And what you think I need**

The ride home was silent, the tension so thick that it was nearly suffocating. Edward was sitting in the backseat, eyes glued to the window, not daring to look up. Jasper had his hands gripped tightly on the steering wheel and his eyes were dangerously narrowed as he drove without even so much as looking over at me. I briefly thought about reaching over and taking one of his hands to try to calm him down, but I couldn't find the strength to do it. Years of experience had taught me that when someone was upset, it was best to just stay away from them. While I couldn't stay away from him being as we were in the same car, I opted to just stare straight ahead, praying that everything would just blow over by the time we got home.

I was badly mistaken. As soon as Jasper pulled up into the driveway, he was out of the car in an instant, slamming the door shut behind him.

"Liz?" Edward grabbed my arm as got out of the car. "I'm scared."

"Don't be, you know how Jasper gets sometimes." I kissed his cheek, trying to reassure him. Though to be honest, I had _never _seen Jasper like this. The silence was thick, his anger written all over his face. With no other option, we walked inside, stopping immediately when we saw Jasper pacing around the living room. The door wasn't even shut all the way before he started.

"Just what in the hell were you thinking Edward!" Jasper's voice, usually the voice of reason, was erratic and a bit out of control.

"We were just talking." Edward set his things down, walking to where our brother was. "Since when am I not allowed to talk?"

"Jesus Christ, do you have any idea what would happen if that guy was to find out about everything?"

"Jasper, I barely know him, what makes you think…"

"I know how you get! I saw it in your eyes Edward. You want this guy and you want him bad. Do you really think you'd be able to keep your mouth shut around him, continue lying to him when he asked about the cuts and bruises? You would slip Edward, you know you would. You're the weakest one here!" That was a low blow. Edward's facial expression dropped, almost looking like he wanted to cry.

"Jazz, I…you're jumping to all the wrong conclusions."

"Are you so desperate to have him that you would risk everything Edward? Risk everyone's safety just so that you can satisfy your _desires_?!" Edward's sexuality had never been an issue with Jasper so I didn't understand where this all was coming from. It hit Edward hard, him looking like he was on the brink of tears.

"What has gotten into you Jasper?" I knew I had to take a stand for Edward, this wasn't right. "He was just talking to him, innocent as that. Why are you upset?" I stood in the space between my two brothers, awaiting his response.

"Liz, you can't pretend for a second that the thought of someone knowing what we go through doesn't terrify you. That, the thought of someone finding out and it getting back to father…why don't you two see the whole picture?!" he threw his hands up and I felt myself moving back from him slightly. I had never seen him so upset before and over nothing no less.

"Jasper please, calm down."

"Like hell I will!" he hissed "You two need to understand that what one of us does, affects all of us. I'm just trying to protect you guys. Edward, I don't care what you have or don't have with this guy but, you cannot let it go any further. I will not end up good for you…for any of us. God the two of you are being extremely stupid and naïve right now! What will start innocent for him will only result in something" he paused, catching his breath "it's only going to end up fucking devastating for everyone!"

The gasp that passed my lips as something hit me didn't go unnoticed and both my brothers stared at me in confusion.

"Jasper, no" I whispered "no, no…"

"What?"

"You," I pointed at him "you sounded like father just now." Shock registered across his face before it was replaced by anger.

"I am nothing like him Liz," he came closer, placing his hands on my shoulders "do you understand me!" There was no need for me to say anything, he had just confirmed it again for himself.

"Let her go Jasper." Edward stepped forward, pushing Jasper away from me forcefully. "If you claim to be nothing like him, then stop _acting _like him. I don't know what's the matter with you, but I won't let you treat me like this." Before he could say anything else, he turned and walked up the stairs, his door slamming shut a minute later. I turned to hesitantly look at Jasper who was staring at me, his green eyes reflecting the battle he was having in his mind.

"Liz," he attempted to take a step towards me but stopped when I held my hands up "please."

"No." I shook my head, having my own mental battle. On the one hand, I was so angry at him for having talked to Edward in such a manner and for treating me the way he did, but at the same time I wanted to help him. I knew Jasper could never be like father, even if they were biologically related.

"Just, no." I backed up, turning on my heel to walk upstairs as well. It took all I had to not turn back around when he softly called my name. As much as I wanted to, I knew I couldn't. He needed to cool down, get his head back on straight. Besides, right now my main concern was Edward. I knew he wouldn't be handling this all very well. One thing Edward did not like, other than the pain and cries, was confrontation. He had just experience one, with our own brother no less. It wasn't supposed to be like this. We were supposed to be sticking together, not attacking one another.

Edward's door was closed, but I walked right in anyways and shut it behind me. He wasn't in his room and for a moment, I was confused. That is, until I heard him in the bathroom. He was sick, clearly emptying his stomach. I sighed, I hated when he got like this. When he was under too much stress, he had been known to literally make himself sick.

Standing up straight, I walked into the bathroom with as much strength as I could muster. My brother needed me right now and I couldn't afford to break with him.

He was on the ground, hands gripping both sides of the seat. He was done, but he was still trembling. I grew angrier with Jasper for having done this to our brother. Grabbing a towel off the counter, I wet it before kneeling beside Edward and pressing it to the back of his neck. He stiffened when I touched him, but when I began talking to him he calmed down somewhat.

As 'weak' as Jasper claimed Edward was, he really only allowed me to see him this way. Not even his own mother had been this close to him during his moments. So, it was my job to take care of him, not anyone else's.

"Liz what are you doing up here?" Not answering him, I instead helped him stand up. His legs seemed weak so I let him lean on me for support. Even though he was much taller than I was, I was stronger at the moment. Helping him to the sink, he brushed his teeth while I went out to grab him a different shirt.

Coming back, he was leaning against the counter staring at me. "What?"

"Why did you come up here?" He repeated when I handed him the shirt.

"Because you're my brother." The answer was rather simple so I don't know he was even asking.

"So is Jasper." He whispered, taking off the dirty shirt and slipping on the clean on. "You're supposed to be helping him Liz, not me."

Stunned by his comment I stepped up closer to him, touching his cheek softly. "I'm where I'm supposed to be."

"Because I'm the weakest one?" He had misinterpreted my comment and took offense to it.

"Absolutely not. Jasper had no right to say those things to you Edward and we both know it. He's just…I don't even know what's going on with him. I've never seen him so angry, it was scary."

"He can't do this to you Liz." Wrapping an arm around his waist, I led him back towards his room where he could rest on the bed. He lay down while I sat beside him.

"Do what?"

"He can't make you choose."

Confused, I waited for him to continue.

"He can't make you pick between the two of us."

"I'm not choosing," I began but he stopped me.

"You coming up here Liz, you chose me instead of him." Letting his words sink in, I thought about it. I hadn't seen it that way. Jasper was angry, and having upset my brother and accusing him of things that weren't right, the only logical choice was to help Edward.

"But, Jasper's angry…he doesn't want me right now." Saying the words physically pained me. Before it would've been alright, but now that true feelings were on the table things were supposed to be different.

_Supposed to be different. _"He promised me."

Sitting up again, Edward took one of my hands and looked at me hesitantly. The switching from confused to angry to hurt didn't go unnoticed. "Liz?"

"He said he would let me help him and yet, it's like he's pushing me further away. I don't get it, why is he treating me like this?"

"We all deal differently Liz." He smiled sadly. "For so long Jasper's been dealing on his own, too scared to let anyone else in. Now that he has you though he shouldn't be acting like that, but I think it'll be awhile before he can fully let you in."

Well, he had a point there and it wasn't something that I had a problem with. No, something else was now bothering me.

"That still doesn't explain how that meant I chose you over him?"

He laughed. "Oh Liz. Jasper's just being a typical guy."

I was lost. "Okay?"

"Even though he's beyond angry right now, he _wanted _you to pick him."

"But, I…"

"Guys never really mean what they say. You think he's pushing you away, it's the complete opposite. He wants you to _pull _him back towards you."

By now my head was starting to spin. I was really lost now. How had this conversation gone from me trying to calm down Edward to him telling me I had gone about this all wrong?

"So you're saying I should completely bypass what he said and did down there?"

Narrowing his eyes, I knew he didn't like what had happened. "No."

"Then what do I do Edward? I hate this feeling of being torn between the two of you. I will always defend you both, even if that means to each other."

"Nothing, Liz. You can't do anything about it. Only Jasper can come to realization that if he doesn't stop, he's going to lose you."

My eyes widened. "He'll never lose me Edward, I'm not going anywhere."

"Then bring him in Liz." Squeezing my hand, he blinked back tears. "Show him you'll never let go."

Grabbing his hand tighter, I pulled him closer to me so that I could wrap my arms around him, his face buried in my hair. Stroking his hair gently, I felt his body beginning to shake a bit again. Only this time, it was from the tears he had been trying to let to contain. "Shh sweetie, it's going to be okay."

"How?" He choked out. "Jasper's right, if I get involved with James it'll only end up hurting you both. That's something I refuse to let happen."

"You deserve happiness too Edward." I was quick to remind him. Always telling me the same, he always failed to see that he deserved it too.

"It's different than you and Jasper though. If father found out that I was dating him or any other guy for that matter, there's no telling what he would do to me. Oh, god" He gasped, his arms wrapping around me tighter "if he knew that you and Jasper knew all along, he would….no, no." He shook his head, more tears falling as his breathing became labored.

"Edward," I panicked and pulled him away from me "breath." Hands on his arms, I inhaled and exhaled deeply with him for a few minutes before he calmed down somewhat. "You can't do that to yourself Edward. Remember what we said about your anxiety."

He nodded. "I'm so sorry Liz. This is my fault. If I wasn't gay then this wouldn't be happening right now. Things would be so much easier without me around."

I honestly wanted to smack him for that comment. "You're still my Edward and I'm always going to love you, no matter who you love or do. We're family." Hugging him one more time, I kissed his forehead and pulled away.

"How long do you think Jasper will be mad at me?"

Opening my mouth, it snapped shut when the door swung open. "I'm not angry at you." Both turning, we came to find Jasper standing in the doorway, warily looking at the two of us. He was silently asking us if he could come in. Edward nodded, but subconsciously scooted closer to me, his grasp tight on me. I don't know if he was scared or trying to protect me, but I knew it didn't sit well with Jasper at all.

"Edward, I…I'm not angry with you." He glanced at our proximity, knowing that he had done something extremely hurtful to the both of us. "I'm just angry at the situation."

That didn't sound any better and neither of us said anything.

"What situation?" Edward finally broke the silence, getting up off the bed and standing face to face with Jasper. "The fact that I'm gay or the fact that you're pushing away Liz when she's just trying to help you?"

Jasper peered around Edward and I stared at him shyly. I didn't want to get in the middle of this more than I already was, but what affected one affected all of us. There was no way out of it no matter how badly we wanted it.

Even though I wasn't saying anything, Jasper could see that we were teaming against him to prove a point. Truth be told, I wasn't against Jasper at all. In fact, I was finding it really hard to not go to him and kiss him, show him I wasn't angry at him. The mere thought made my heart rate increase slightly, but I remained seated.

Sighing, he knew that he was losing this battle. He knew that he was wrong, but was having a hard time admitting it. Typical guy, Jasper didn't like to be weak. Or at least, didn't like to show weakness in front of other people.

"Edward, you know I didn't mean that shit I said downstairs. I've just, well, I've been on fucking nerves end lately and I don't know what came over me. You know who you're with doesn't mean anything. You're my brother and I love you all the same." Though a bit rushed, there was sincerity in Jasper's words and we knew he was telling the truth.

Edward stood there for a second, his eyes staring straight into Jasper's. I knew that he desperately wanted to believe him, but something was holding him back. I couldn't blame him though. When you've been hurt so many times throughout your life, it's almost impossible to fully trust someone. Thought Edward and Jasper were extremely close, Jasper had hurt Edward and that changed things. Though he would still love him dearly, Edward would be more cautious around Jasper for awhile.

"Edward," Jasper hedged "are you going to say something?" Shifting his weigh from one foot to the other, he looked oddly nervous. It was like Jasper was terrified over the thought of Edward being upset with him. In a way, I was glad. Jasper needed to realize that he couldn't say things and expect for everyone to forgive him. We loved him of course, but weren't about to sit and let him say those things to us.

The tension was suddenly broken when, in a blink of an eye, Edward took one more step towards Jasper and flung his arms tightly around him. Surprise flashed in Jasper's eyes at the immediate contact, but he was soon hugging Edward back with just as much force. Watching the two of them silently forgiving each other, I fought back all the emotions forming in the back of my throat. I hated thinking that things would've turned awkward and painful between the three of us. It was something I don't think I was capable of handling.

Finally, Edward spoke. "I love you asshole." His lips twisted slightly before bursting into laughter, Jasper and I following suit right away. Edward _never _talked like that so it was actually quite comical.

"I love you too man." Jasper patted Edward's back. "Besides, the three of us have to stick together right? We're all we got." He looked over at me and I nodded and he gave me a smile that made my heart skip a bit. It was crazy, the affect that he could have on me with one little look. Thankful that he was finally seeing the light, I pushed the nagging thoughts to the back of my mind. Thoughts that kept reminding me of the fact that Jasper didn't exactly apologize to me, only to Edward. Which Edward deserved the apology more than I did, but it still stung a bit to think that he didn't.

We still had another hour or so before mother and father came home from work so we all sat on Edward's bed and talked.

"So," Jasper started "tell me about this guy Edward." He seemed a bit hesitant to actually want to know, but he was at least making an effort.

It worked because Edward's face lit up at the very mention of James. Frowning, I wondered just how long he had liked him and why hadn't I noticed before? I knew almost everything about Edward, but I hadn't seen this coming. Not that there was anything wrong with it, I was actually eager to hear about this James character, wanted to know about the guy who had somehow captivated my brother.

"Well," he looked down, a slight blush staining his cheeks "I don't exactly know a whole lot about him other than his name and that he's in our Spanish class."

"You should get to know him better then." I encouraged my brother. I knew he was shy and going up to someone, especially at school, wouldn't be easy. "Have him come sit with us one day maybe?"

Both my brothers looked over at me like I was crazy. "What?"

"Maybe that's not a good idea Liz." Jasper was quick to shoot it down.

"Yea Liz, lunch is our thing."

_Our thing? _I wanted to laugh at these boys. They were so damn complicated sometimes. "Well when else are you going to talk to him?"

"Liz, I…I don't know. Today was a onetime thing I think. I doubt he'll want to talk to me anymore."

Shooting a glare at Jasper, he spoke up quickly. "Don't let my idiotic temper ruin this Edward. If James is what you want, then you should go for it. You…well fuck man you deserve to be happy too."

The rest of the conversation floated on that way for the next forty or so minutes. I tried to keep with my brothers, but my mind kept wandering all over the place.

As much as I wanted my brother to be happy, I knew that there was a risk to be had if he pursued James or vice versa. Just like there was a constant risk with Jasper and I now. We had already slipped once and who's to say it wouldn't happen again. Though Edward would have it a bit easier, only seeing James at school, it would still be tough.

I knew my brother though and he wasn't just going to walk up to James and flirt or try anything with him. In the back of his mind, he would know the danger of it all as well. Though I didn't want to, I had to think about what would happen if father were to ever find out. Having forbidden Edward from ever being with another man, the consequences would be dire. Not just for him, but for Jasper and I as well because there'd be no way we'd let Edward take the fall without trying to protect and defend him.

We, like always, would stick together. Good or bad, we were all each other had.

Surprisingly, the conversation ended up in the kitchen as both Edward and Jasper helped me make dinner. It was refreshing, being as I was always alone in here. Well, they mostly talked while I cooked. They weren't exactly gifted in the culinary field. They did manage to make a salad and get the plates and glasses out.

By the time mother and father arrived dinner was done and the table was set. There was no sign of our argument or the fact that Edward had gotten sick and nearly had a panic attack upstairs. Jasper looked calm, all traces of anger gone from his face. I on the other hand, felt like a complete mess. I hid it well though, something I had perfected over the years.

Serving and eating dinner was oddly quiet, father not saying a whole lot. We soon found out why. He had something big going on at work and as soon as he was done, he retreated to his study. Before leaving however, he made sure to remind us that we weren't allowed to make any loud noise while he worked or there'd be hell to pay. Knowing that just wasn't a threat, we agreed and planned on following through.

While Jasper and Edward went upstairs to do homework, mother and I cleaned up the kitchen. I loved these moments with her, we hardly ever got them anymore. She would always go wherever father went when dinner was over so for her to be here with me, even if we were just cleaning, it meant a lot.

"So sweetie, how is school going?" Another thing mother and I hardly did anymore was talk about everyday things that most mothers and daughters talked about.

Smiling, I started drying the dishes. "It's going good."

"Any boys?" She asked casually, causing me to almost drop the plate in my hand.

I just shook my head.

"Eliza, you're a beautiful young woman. How can you tell me that no boy has taken interest?"

"I don't know mom, besides I'm not allowed to date remember?"

She frowned. "I know honey, but you should be living life more. You're always working hard, taking care of everyone."

"Living more includes having a boyfriend?" I laughed, I truly did love my mother.

"Not exactly, but you never know. So, you're sure no boys at school?"

"None." _Why would that matter anyways, I have a boy right here at home. _

Shaking my head of those thoughts, I continued cleaning. I didn't exactly have Jasper. He wasn't mine or anything. I'd like to think that, but it didn't make it true.

It was, well it was complicated.

Shifting from boys, we talked about the new flowers she planned on planting soon as the weather got nicer and this new book she was reading. My mother, like myself, was an avid reader and it was one of the few 'luxuries' father allowed us to have. Apparently, books were safe and wouldn't give us any ideas. TV and movies on the other hand were liable to corrupt our minds.

Yea, if anything _he _was the one twisting our minds and breaking us down. That was something no movie could ever do. Sometimes I thought about how much like a movie our lives were. Only difference was that once the screen went black and the lights went out, we were still in the same situation. There was no happy ending here, just a constant cycle of pain. If anything, I guess you could say we were living in a never-ending horror film. Not the best thing to compare your life to, but that's just the way it was.

Mother and I finished cleaning, making sure everything was put away properly before we headed upstairs. She walked towards her room, saying she was going to read before bed. Luckily, she didn't have to stay awake until father came to bed. If that were the case, she would be up until who knows when tonight. When he worked at him, he worked 'til all hours of the night. One thing father wasn't was lazy. If he started something, he didn't stop until he finished. He was relentless in nearly every aspect of his life. Unfortunately, that didn't exactly boast well for us. The pain he inflicted, it was never half way. He normally did it until we screamed. Though now that we were older, we were getting better at picking up on his games and tactics.

Plain and simple, we were used to the things he did that we were able to keep quiet when he hit us because we knew that wouldn't end up well in the long run.

After hugging my mother and kissing her cheek, she disappeared gracefully into her room. Even after all this time and abuse, my mother still had this elegant quality about her. She always held her head high, even when she was breaking on the inside. It was a trait that I tried to mimic.

Hand on my doorknob, I paused for a second. Did I really want to end this not without talking to Jasper? Could I really let him talk to me like that and not say anything about it?

I decided that I couldn't and I ended up walking down the hall to his room. His door wasn't locked and when I turned the knob and walked in, I wasn't too surprised to find him sitting there looking at me.

He was sitting at his desk, computer open and running. He had turned around in his seat and was watched me as I closed the door and walked over to him. Minding the computer I leaned against his desk, quickly glancing down at the screen. He was doing something with his pictures again. I had no idea how to do those kinds of things and it was somewhat fascinating to me.

Though, the interesting things on the computer screen weren't enough to stop me from bringing up what happened earlier.

"You're pissed off at me aren't you?" He initialed the conversation.

The tone of his voice was tired and guilty. So much so that I looked down at my feet to avoid looking at him. "No."

"Liar." He called my bluff, rising quickly so he could see me better. "Liz," placing his hand on me, he lifted my chin so I could see him "I'm sorry."

"I know you're sorry, but it doesn't take back what you did and said." Confidence was slowly creeping back. I wanted him to know how I felt.

"No, no it doesn't. I fucked up majorly this afternoon and I feel like a complete jackass."

"It wasn't just what you said earlier, it was what happened in class too."

He cringed, eyes narrowing. "I overreacted didn't I?"

That was an understatement. "More than that Jasper. That Jacob guy wasn't going to hurt me. You said that things between us had to be secret and the way you acted…"

"I hated seeing his hands on you Liz. I don't want someone else touching you. I know he wasn't going to hurt you, but shit I can't help but think that. Something in my mind tells me that every guy is capable of hurting you. I can't let that happen to you. You're too important to me."

"I just hate feeling this way. I hate feeling torn. I don't want that."

"Torn?"

"Edward said that when I went upstairs to help him, it was like I picking you over him. Did you think that Jasper?" I wanted to know, see if we were on the same page.

"Yes." Apparently, we weren't.

"I wasn't though. You were angry and it was like you didn't want me to be around. I had to comfort him, make sure he was alright. You know how he gets…" I trailed off, not wanting to think about poor Edward in the state he had been in earlier.

Pushing some hair back, his hand lingered on my face. "How could you think that I didn't want you Liz?"

Edward's voice floated in my mind, _bring him in Liz and show him you'll never let go._

"Jasper," I move in closer, his hand sliding up into my hair as a result "I just want to be there for you. I can't do that if you push me away."

"I'm not," he stepped even closer "pushing you away. I want you Liz, I'll always want you near me. It fucking kills me to even think that you're mad at me."

"That's just the thing, I'm not mad at you. I just want you to trust me more, for you to know that I'm not going anywhere."

"I'm really screwing things up here aren't I?"

I smiled and shrugged. "Not exactly, moody maybe."

He smirked a bit, hands moving down and around me. "Promise you'll push me Liz."

"Push you where?"

"Don't let me get out of control, don't let me act like _him_." He spoke of father with absolute hatred. "I don't want to make things harder than they already are."

Moving my hands, I held him closer to me. "You're nothing like father, Jasper."

"Can you promise me that though Liz? I don't want to lose it like that again," looking away I could tell that he was ashamed "I hate knowing that I acted in that way, scaring you both. I _never _want that to happen again."

"I promise." I answered him quickly "We have to do this together though okay?"

He nodded, arms tightening around my waist before beginning a trail of kisses from my neck up to my lips. When his met mine, everything else faded to the background. It was like it was just him and I in this room, in this world and nothing else mattered. I loved the feel of his lips on me as he continued kissing me, I briefly wondered how his lips would feel against other areas.

"You know," he pulled away reluctantly "I could fucking kiss you all day." Pressing one last kiss to my lips, he rested his forehead against mine. "You're like a damn drug."

I quirked an eyebrow. I was like a _drug? _"Is that a good thing?" I was a bit confused. I thought drugs were bad for people so why would he compare me to something like that?

"It's a very good thing. It's like saying I can't get enough, probably never will." He explained it further and I understood now.

Taking a chance, I ran my finger over his bottom lip. "I like when you kiss me." I laughed, being as he barely kissed me for the first time yesterday. I too was beginning to see that I was growing dependent on those lips as well. Were they my drug too? Probably.

"I do hope that you will let me show you other things as well Liz." His voice dropped.

I didn't know exactly what he was talking about, being as I had no experience what so ever with intimacy. I could only imagine though. Given the way he was staring at me, it was like he wanted to do a whole lot more than just kiss me.

The mere idea made my knees feel a little weak and that sensation from the other day build once again. Noting the change in my expression, Jasper eyed me curiously. "You okay Liz?"

I nodded quickly, blushing like a fool.

He laughed lightly. "Your blush is a damn weakness you know that? Especially," his hands trailed up my sides "if you're thinking about what I think you are."

I couldn't speak, fearful of what I would say.

"You're innocence is quite fascinating to me." Hands still on my side, they slipped underneath the hem of the shirt I was wearing, trailing lightly over my skin. Closing my eyes, I tried to control my breathing. "Will you let me touch you Liz?" He leaned in, whispering in my ear before kissing the spot right below it.

"Yes." I squeaked out, feeling his lips twist against me.

"Good because I'm dying to know what you feel like, what you taste like." Coming back to face me, his eyes seemed to be darker.

I didn't know what he meant once again. Though, whatever it was, it completely terrified and excited me.

Lips moved lower, skimming over my neck. He was cautious though, not wanting a repeat of yesterday. Eyes still closed, I found myself getting lost in everything that he was doing to me. These were things I had never experienced before and I wanted more. Though, just when I thought he'd go further, his lips suddenly left my neck and his hands removed themselves from my skin.

"Why did you stop?" I asked rather breathlessly. Shaking his head, he gave me one of those smiles that I loved.

"As much as I would love to continue on my journey, there are too many people in the house Liz. We're liable to get caught."

His journey? Get caught? What was he planning on doing now?

Whatever it was I wanted it, I wanted to know desperately.

Pouting, he leaned in and kissed my cheek. "Don't give me the pout Liz, you have no idea what it does to me. I'm very liable to change my mind if you continue."

Smiling ruefully, I nodded and pulled away from him completely before heading towards the door. "Night Jasper."

"Sleep well, Liz." He watched me until I had closed the door behind me. Making my way towards my room, I couldn't wipe my smile off my face.

Though today had been one hell of a day, I felt like I had just accomplished something great.

Not only had Edward and Jasper worked things out, but I had been able to tell Jasper how I felt and that he needed to let me in instead of pushing me away.

I had also heard some amazing advice from Edward. He told me to bring Jasper in and to not let him go.

Well hell, after that kiss and the things he was telling me, there was _no _way I was letting that man out of my sight.

I wanted him to show me things, make me feeling things I had never felt before.

Anticipation built at the mere thought of it all.

I had been right when I told Jasper that he was nothing like father.

Father would've never apologized for the things he said to Edward and I. He would never admit his faults and promise to try and work on them.

Besides that, Jasper made me feel wanted, safe and even…_sexy._ I didn't know how, but the way he looked at me just did things to me.

I knew know that I wasn't torn. No I knew just where it was that I needed to be, where I belonged.

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**I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. **

**Jasper has some odd mood swings doesn't he? I love Edward, he's such a sweetheart. **

**Your reviews keep me inspired.  
**


	8. Sweetest Sin

**AN: Thanks so much for the continued support. I hope you enjoy this chapter, I'm quite nervous about it. **

**To Lindsey, thanks for letting me show you part of this...easing my anxiety just a bit!  
**

**As always all I own is Liz and my plot line. **

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****Chapter 8: Sweetest Sin**

**It would feel so good  
To be so bad  
You don't know how bad  
I want that  
I would do anything  
To feel  
Your lips upon my lips  
Your fingertips on my fingertips.  
Your skin upon my skin  
Would be the sweetest sin**

The past two weeks have been both exhilarating and frustrating.

I can never keep up with Jasper. He quite possibly has more mood swings than a woman. One minute he's letting me in, letting me help him and the next he's not saying much. I kept telling myself that it was just because he had spent so much time dealing with all the abuse alone and in his own way, but I was finding it difficult to believe that. I mean, I _had _to be helping him somewhat right? I never left, even when it seemed like he didn't want me. He himself told me that he wanted me to push him, to make sure he didn't shut me out. I was trying, but it was no walk in the park. However, I was quite used to things never being easy and I wasn't about to give up without a fight. He was my brother, and I would be there for him no matter what.

Though it seemed as though I was caving into him quickly, overlooking his moodiness, there was a reason as to why. Underneath everything, there was a boy who was broken down and in need of someone to care for him. I knew that I had to do whatever it took to try and bring some light to our rather dreary lives. I had succeeded a few times, getting Jasper to smile when it was just the two of us. Even when he didn't 'want' me, he still let me be with him. He could remain dead silent, but I would physically stay at his side until he felt somewhat better. I was beginning to notice that he liked it when I would lie beside him and be as close as possible that we could. I think there was a part of him that felt better when he knew I was out of harm's way when I was with him. That and the fact that other than him, no one else could make me feel the things he could. Jasper made it very clear that he enjoyed it when he was able to hold me, to touch me.

Though, as much as I craved it, he hadn't kissed me again since that night in his room. There of course were little moments here and there when he'd kiss my forehead or cheek, but I hadn't felt his lips directly on mine in two weeks. Even though I know I shouldn't, I felt somewhat rejected. He himself told me that he would never get tired of kissing me. So, that had to mean that I was good at it right? There must be some other reason as to why he hasn't kissed me since that night, I was sure of it. What that was, I hadn't the slightest idea.

Other than dealing with Jasper, I was also dealing with Edward. After realizing that both Jasper and I weren't mad over the fact that he seemed to have taken a liking to James, he had been somewhat flirty with him. In Spanish, we in a semi circle and James was almost directly across from him. During class, the two would try to discreetly at the other. Though, neither of them would be looking at just the right moment. I wanted to push Edward, tell him to just for it! However, I knew he would never. As much as Edward liked James, he was also very shy and very terrified of the fact of being involved with someone of the same sex. He had never had a boyfriend before and I'm sure he had no idea how to go about it. Hell, I had no idea either. The only one in this family who had ever dated someone was Jasper and even then, they never lasted long. Never long than a month or two, the girls Jasper was involved in ended up breaking up with him for unknown reasons. He never seemed to have to his heart broken though and I wondered why.

All I knew is that between Jasper and Edward, I barely had any time for myself these days. I did all my school work, made sure everything in the house was taken care of course, but it wasn't easy. I had no idea how I did it. I wouldn't trade my taking care of my brothers for anything though. As long as my grades didn't sleep and I was able to catch a few hours of sleep a night, I was good. At least, that's what I kept telling myself. I knew firsthand what it was like to have a mini breakdown and I wasn't exactly in the mood to head down that road any time soon.

That's why when this morning when father was causing a riot down the hall, cursing about how he had to go into work for the day, I was so relieved. Father gone all day meant I could sleep an extra two, maybe even three hours. Mother had come in as soon as he left, saying that she was going to head down and visit one of her friends. Mother wasn't stupid. She knew that free afternoons like that didn't happen every day so she was going to make the most of it. I knew she enjoyed being social with her small group of friends and I was happy for her. She needed a day to relax too.

Father left around ten and I was already falling back asleep when I heard a bedroom door open and the sound of someone walking down the hall. I knew it was Jasper right away because there was no way that Edward would pass up a chance to sleep. I might be a deep sleeper, but Edward loves sleeping. Well, when he's not having nightmares that it. Which, I'm sure he wouldn't be having any since last night was pretty bearable. No one got physically hurt so that was always a plus.

Personally I thought Jasper was crazy for heading outside to work when he could be catching up on some rest. I knew my brother though, he always had to be doing something. He was never the one who just liked to sit around and do nothing. Though, he sure did enjoy it when he and I spent time together doing nothing. I didn't really understand his ethics, but that was Jasper for you.

I, on the other hand, had no problem what so ever curling up with my blanket and falling into a deep sleep.

A deep sleep it was. It was like I was having nonstop dreams about Jasper. Dreams about things I had never experienced or done, but given the slight tightening I felt in my stomach when I eventually woke up it'd be safe to say that these were enjoyable things. They were definitely things I wanted to experience in real life.

When I glanced at my alarm clock, I was surprised to see that it was already past noon. I must've been really tired because I hadn't stirred once. Either that or I was really enjoying my dreams. At any rate, I knew that I needed to get up and shower. Father wouldn't be gone all day and I had some homework to work on.

I showered quickly, deciding to just throw on some shorts and a long sleeve shirt. If I was going to be working on homework for the next couple hours, I wanted to at least be comfortable. It was the beginning of March, but it was still a bit chilly outside. We were transiting from winter to spring and while it wasn't exactly warm enough for shorts, they were fine for wearing around the house.

I grabbed my books, trying to decide what subject to try and tackle first. My Biology book was the first one I saw and I chose that one immediately. If I attempted this one first, then I would have an excuse to go and see Jasper. Though I didn't really need one, I actually did need help with our assignment. Not wanting a repeat of my last exam score, I needed all the help I could get.

Taking my things, I quickly walked out of my room and headed down the hall. Walking, Edward's door opened and he walked out just as I passed by. He looked up and smiled at me.

"Off to write?" He was holding his notebook in one hand, his mp3 player in the other with a pen tucked behind his ear.

"Yea, thought I'd go outside for a bit." Shrugging he leaned down and kissed my forehead. "Have fun with the homework." He left me in the hall, leaving me to finally reach my destination. I knocked on the door, even though there was no real reason. He didn't say anything and the door was unlocked so I decided to just walk inside. The second I did the bathroom door opened and I, like a fool, dropped my books to the ground when I saw him.

Appearing to just have taken a shower, he emerged clad in just a pair of jeans. Towel around his neck, he was attempting to dry his hair but some of the water still dripped down and I felt my cheeks flushing as I watched the water work its' way down his chest, disappearing under the waistband of his pants.

Aware of my obvious gawking, he crossed the room and sat on the edge of his bed and stared right back at me. Trying to regain some of my dignity I hastily picked up my books, took a deep breath and prayed my voice didn't betray me. "I need help."

He smiled slyly. "Help with what Liz?"

Flustered completely, I couldn't tear my eyes off of him. God, I was so weak! I was hooked on him, desperately. "Um…this?" I held up the book stupidly and he just laughed.

"Liz, come." He motioned for me to come to him, holding his hand out towards me. I wasted no time in joining him, my hand fitting perfectly with his. With our hands clasped, he reached up with his other one and plucked the book right out of my hand and tossed it to the ground. I watched him warily, noticing how his eyes seemed to be lingering for a long while in certain places as he stared me. Snaking an arm around my waist, he pulled me tighter against him so that I was standing in between his legs. Resting his head on my chest, he took a deep breath before he exhaled almost shakily. Hands worked their way up my back as my own wound themselves in his hair. Still damp, I leaned down and breathed in deeply. God he smelt incredible.

So fixated on how he was making me feel, I barely noticed him standing up quickly and turning us around. What I did feel however was him pushing me back, my legs coming in contact with the bed. I fell back almost effortlessly, Jasper hovering over me a second later. He was staring down at me, like a wolf stalking his prey. I couldn't help but feel completely exhilarated by the look he was giving me.

"Fuck Liz," He ran his hands down my sides, grabbing my shorts and sliding them down easily. I felt him trail one of his fingers over the front of my panties and I shut my eyes, the sensation feeling amazing. It was then that I realized that they were a bit damp. I didn't know from what though.

"Liz," Jasper was back, hovering over my slightly "have you ever touched yourself?"

I tilted my head, slightly confused. "No." That was an odd question for him to ask me. Odd and a bit embarrassing.

He sighed, but a slight smirk formed on his beautiful face. "Really?"

I shook my head.

"Ah well," he touched my face "that's all about to change. I'll show you just how amazing it can feel." his hand trailed down my cheek, over my neck before beginning to gather my shirt in his hands, bunching up the fabric before pulling it up and over my head.

His eyes darkened considerably as he took in the newly exposed flesh. Lowering his face, I felt his nose and lips skimming over the lacy material of my bra. His hand, which had been resting on my stomach, creeped up higher and up around my back, fingers unhooking my bra expertly. He took it off quickly, my hands coming up quickly to cover my breasts as soon as the cool air hit me.

"No Liz," Jasper's voice was firm, his hands covering mine "let me see you." Caving in to him I let him remove our hands, pinning them at my sides.

"So beautiful." He murmured and before I knew it his lips were pressing soft kisses on my chest, but that was only the beginning. My back arched up against him when his tongue flicked over the tip of my breast.

"Oh Jasper" I sighed. He repeated the same action a few times before he actually started sucking on the skin gently, the pressure so amazing. "Please…" I tried to move closer to him but his hand kept me still, not letting me move as he continued his assault. Just when I thought I couldn't handle any more of this, his mouth began moving lower, pressing open, hot kisses on my skin. He trailed down my stomach, pausing to dip his tongue inside my belly button. It tickled slightly but at the same time, a surge of desire shot down in between my legs, causing me to squeeze them together, in hopes of creating some kind of friction.

"Let me take care of that for you." he whispered, his fingers hooking in the sides of my panties. Oh, god. As desperately as I wanted him to, something was nagging me in the back of my mind. Not so much about this not being exactly right but the thought of being caught.

"Jasper, wait." I called his attention back to me. "We can't. What if father comes back home?" God, if father were to catch Jasper and I like this, who knows what he would do to us. I couldn't bear the thought of him hurting Jasper again.

"Father won't be back anytime soon Liz." Knowing that, what other choice did I have then to just let him continue? Because God only knows I wanted it, needed it.

I relaxed back against the pillows, wondering just exactly was going to happen. With his fingers still hooked, he began sliding them down ever so slowly until I felt the air flow over my body. Sitting back on his heels, he took me in for a few minutes, eyes tracing over every curve, every scar and bruise before he gently took my leg, placing a kiss on my ankle as he began moving up wards. As he began to get closer to where I wanted his lips the most, I could feel something warm beginning to slide down my legs. Sitting up a bit, I wanted to know what it was and why it was happening.

"Liz, you're so fucking wet." Jasper lips were on my inner thigh, his tongue rolling over the now fading bruise.

"Jasper?" I asked a bit shakily "Jasper what does that mean?" I had a slight idea, but I wasn't exactly sure.

"It means," his nose moved up and down my thigh "that you're aroused, sexually excited."

I swallowed thickly "I like it, Jasper." I admitted and I felt him smile against my skin.

"I can tell." He began to slowly moving closer to my womanhood and then, I felt him blowing slightly on the heated spot and I groaned at the contact. "Jasper, please." what I was asking for, I wasn't sure but I knew I wanted more of it.

Shifting himself so he was propped up a bit higher, I felt him sliding his finger down before dipping in for a second.

"Now, what I tell you is of the utmost importance. I want you to take a deep breath and when I say so, I want you to exhale but not until I say so, do you understand me?"

"Yes." I nodded, sucking in a deep breath before, quite unexpectedly I might add, I felt him push his finger inside of me. Still holding my breath, I felt my inner walls clenching around him tightly.

"Exhale slowly Liz." He commanded and I did what he said. He began to pump his finger slowly in and out of me, my body trying to get used to it.

"Breathe Liz." He reminded me and I tried to focus on that, but soon all I could focus on was the feeling of his finger moving. It was so deliciously sinful, having never been touched this way.

Jasper pulled out for a moment before he added a second finger inside me, stretching me even further.

"Oh hell" I threw my head back and he laughed a little bit. "Jasper, this feel so good."

"Mm, you ain't seen nothing yet." His fingers soon picked up the pace, pumping in and out of me almost fervently. I writhed on the bed, pleasure hitting me in places I didn't know even existed. A warm sensation was beginning to flow throughout my entire body and the faster and harder Jasper went, I could feel something tightening in my lower stomach, in the same spot as before but only this time, I felt like there was a coil and it was about to spring and explode at any moment.

"Come for me Liz." Jasper moved his other hand and began rubbing my already sensitive little bundle of nerves at the same time I felt him curve his fingers inside of me, brushing against something. The feeling was so good, it was sinful; something I had never _ever _felt before in my life. Gasping sharply, it was all I needed as I began to feel something like a firecracker begin to detonate. I screamed as pleasure ripped through my entire body as I clenched and unclenched on Jasper's fingers as more of that warm liquid slid down my legs and I felt l would pass out from all the pleasure.

"Mm, oh god" I rambled, slowly coming down from my high. Jasper removed his fingers and I whimpered. He crawled up alongside my body, giving me a knowing smirk. I turned and watched him as he stuck the very two fingers that had been inside me and brought them to his lips, slowly licking them. It was highly sensual to me and before I knew it, I grabbed his hand, bringing it to my lips. I wanted to know what I tasted like, being as Jasper had a look of contentment on his face. Kissing his fingertips lightly, I let his hand fall gently, landing on my side underneath my breast. He caressed the skin gently, his touch feather like.

"Thank you Jasper." I sighed, closing my eyes. I didn't even know how to explain how I was feeling.

"Don't thank me Liz, this is something I've been wanting to do for awhile and something I plan on doing over and over again."

I swallowed nervously. "Really?"

"Yes Liz, really. Why do you think I've never had any serious girlfriends? They were never you, Liz. Besides, now that I've tasted you, I can't wait for the day when you let me bury myself deep inside of you."

Oh, god that sounded divine. To have Jasper be connected with me in that way, nothing sounded better.

Though he had just admitted something deeply personal with me, I still needed to know.

"Did you ever sleep with any of those girls?" I asked shyly, but a part of me already knew.

He nodded slowly. "Casual fucks Liz, that's all." I didn't know if that was supposed to make me feel better or not, but it didn't work in any case. I suddenly felt insanely jealous of every girl that had been with Jasper so intimately; being able to touch him, make him feel things. I wanted to be that person.

I looked up at him a bit hesitantly. "If we're ever to have sex Jasper, is it also going to be casual?"

He smirked, grabbing my hand, pulling me over so that I was straddling his lap. "Believe me Liz when the day comes, you better believe that I'm going to worship you like the fucking precious girl I know you are." Gripping my hips gently, he moved them in a small circular motion and my mouth fell open. Even though he was fully clothed, I could feel something hard pressing up against me.

"And," his lips hovered above my ear "when he have sex, I'm going to make sure you feel every" his hips shifted again "single fucking thing, so you know just how much you effect me. Effect me in a way no girl has ever done."

"Mm, that sounds wonderful." I rested my forehead against his as he sucked on my ear lobe, sighing and giggling as he did so.

"Liz, look at me." I felt him grab my face gently, bringing it so that we were face to face. His blue eyes were dark with desire. Staring at those full lips of his, I couldn't help but lick in my lips in anticipation, biting on my lower one as I waited for him.

"Damn it Liz!" he hissed, bringing me down closer to him, our lips only a few centimeters away from each other. "How is it possible that you can do this to me so easily?"

"What?" I asked innocently. I honestly didn't know what he meant.

"You merely look at me, and I want to devour every inch of you." He slid one hand behind my neck before closing the gap between us and pressed his lips against mine. I was rejoicing so hard, this being what I had been wanting for days. I felt him run his tongue over my bottom lip and I hesitantly opened my mouth, letting him in. The spark I felt didn't go unnoticed and I felt that growing sensation again. Jasper's hands were on my back, roaming lower until they were gripping my backside.

As he began to deepen the kiss, I felt him grow harder underneath me and I knew that meant that he was aroused as well. In what little knowledge I did have, and I was quite pleased that I was the one making him this way. His lip slid down my own to what I noticed was becoming one of his favorite spots. So wrapped up that I didn't even feel when his teeth nipped at the overheated skin on the side of my neck. All I could muster was a soft moan as I pushed myself further against him. I loved it when he did that. I couldn't even explain the pleasure that rippled through my body when his lips touched that delicate spot. I wanted to return the favor, somehow.

"Jasper, can I…touch you?" I felt the heat rising in my cheeks as I pulled away from him a bit breathlessly.

"Yes." He said simply. I sat there for a second, thinking about what I wanted to do. As quickly as I could, I unclasped and unzipped his jeans. The second I touched him, a stifled groan passed his lips and he lifted his hips against my hand, rubbing against me slightly. I suddenly wanted more. Not asking for permission, I gently began to tug on his pants and he almost too instantly complied, pulling them off for me and threw them to the side.

I wasted no time in touching the newly freed instrument. My fingers moved up and down, not really knowing what I was doing but from the sounds he was making, I suppose I was doing a good job. As I continued to touch him, something interesting happened. At the very tip, something bubbled at the top; a clear drop of liquid. Always being the curious one, I leaned closer and ran my finger top over the top before bringing it to my lips. It wasn't bad, the taste.

"Liz," Jasper lifted my face with his hand, his eyes dark "you don't have to…"

"No, I want to…can I Jasper? Can I taste more of you?" He threw his head back as he mumbled something incoherent. Taking that as a yes, I positioned myself so that I was settled in between his legs. Licking my lips slightly, I leaned back down again, wrapping them just around the head. He was long, thick and I wasn't sure how this all worked or if he would even fit. There was only one way to find out though so after a few seconds, I began lowering my mouth, taking more of him. When he hit the back of my throat, I gagged slightly but recovered.

"Fuck, Liz." Jasper gripped the back of my neck "you…shit!" he gasped as I started moving slowly, my lips making a funny sucking noise as I began to give him what I heard people say was a blow job. Soon, his hand was guiding my mouth to move faster. I could feel that familiar sensation again, growing rapidly between my legs. The sensation telling me that I was aroused according to Jasper. Well, whatever it was, it was beginning to become more prominent as I licked and sucked him faster.

"Liz…oh damn it, right there!" his hand gripped me tighter, pulling my hair "I'm not…oh, fuck…" and then without warning, I felt him twitch in my mouth before something started to spill from the tip, spilling down my throat. It was more of the salty liquid and I did what I figured I was supposed to do and swallowed everything. No longer hard, he lifted me up gently so that we were face to face once again.

"Did I do good Jasper?" I watched as my brother licked his lips before bringing me back closer to him, our lips meeting once again.

"It was fucking fantastic." He murmured in my ear "Are you sure you've never done this before?" he teased gently.

I shook my head "Did I…make you feel good?" That's all I wanted to hear from him; that I had done something good, bringing him even an ounce amount of pleasure that he had given me.

"Your lips were heaven, Liz. I don't _ever _want another girl's lips on me." He pulled me tighter against him, my head resting under his chin as we sat there, completely naked for what seemed like forever but still not enough time. Jasper said that we needed to get dressed because father would be coming back soon. I knew that I would need to get a start on dinner so we reluctantly parted, getting dressed, making sure that we didn't look suspicious at all. Though, I didn't know how I was going to do that. Having just received and done things I had _never _done or felt, I don't know how I'd be able to think about anything else.

Somehow though, I managed to do just that. I changed from my shorts into a pair of jeans, knowing I had to look suitable for dinner. I pinned as much as my hair back so it wouldn't get in my face while I cooked before heading down towards the kitchen.

As I prepared the food, I couldn't wipe the grin off my face. I was beyond happy. Not only had Jasper and I just shared something extremely personal and intimate, but I had the feeling that he was going to let me in fully now. His confession of him never dating girls fully because they weren't me meant a lot. I literally felt like my heart would explode, I was that happy.

He had made me feel good and it turned out I was capable of doing the same thing for him. To me, there was nothing better. I wanted nothing more than for Jasper to be happy and for him to achieve that with me, there was not better feeling.

I was nearly done with dinner when our mother returned home. At the same time, Jasper and Edward joined us in the kitchen.

"Did you all have a good afternoon?" I don't even remember when the last time was we were all like this, seemingly to be in a good mood.

"I wrote." Edward set his things down, going to wash his hands.

"I taught Liz about Biology." Jasper brushed past me, making his way to the dining room. I hoped my cheeks didn't redden too much because that would've been horrible.

Mother nodded, helping me finish before we set the table. Right on time, father returned from his weekend trip to the office. He seemed in a relatively calm mood, but we all knew that could change in an instant.

I served the plates and sat down, breathing a sigh of relief when he didn't say anything to me. I watched as Jasper's eyes seemed to linger on me for a few seconds when I sat down, the makings of a smile gracing his lips. No one else seemed to notice so I was glad.

Mother and father passed most of dinner talking while we sat in silence and ate. I never really paid attention to what father had to say about work. It wasn't that all important to me and we never saw any of his coworkers so it's not like we had to know things about them. Oh sure there was that yearly company luncheon we had to attend every year, but that was it. Occasionally, there were more events, but it was usually mother who went while the three of us stayed at home.

I was counting my blessings when dinner dwindled down calmly and without any drama. I stood like always to gather up the now empty plates so I could start cleaning. I kept my eyes cast downward as I collected father's plate. I went to the kitchen and was coming back for the other plates when I heard father clear his throat.

"Eliza, young lady do you think I'm stupid?" Turning, I slowly turned back to look at him. Was this a trick question? "You better explain yourself damn it!" His voice has suddenly hardened and rose to that tone that was never good.

"I," I was completely confused once again "I'm sorry father, I don't know what you mean."

"Look," He stood from his seat quickly, yanking me towards the mirror that was hanging in the living room "you're going to tell me that _this," _his fingers ran over my neck roughly "is nothing?!"

Gasping, I turned back to quickly glance at Jasper. He was in complete panic mode, eyes wide as he stared back at me. With what happened last time, you'd think we'd know better. We had been careless yet again, myself just as guilty. Too caught up in the moment, I hadn't even noticed him….

"Eliza, look at me!" Father's harsh voice pulled me back to him. "You tell me right now or so help me God..." His grip tightened on my arm and I could feel it already beginning to bruise. "Tell me who did this to _my _daughter!" I cringed at his words, they just sounded so possessive and wrong to me.

From the corner of my eye, I saw Jasper beginning to stand up from his seat. At the same time, father's grip was becoming way too painful.

"Tell me." he hissed. Scared, I wanted father to stop and couldn't let Jasper get hurt over me again. Panicked, I knew I had to do something and fast.

The words came out before I could stop them, saying the first name that popped into my head. "Jacob!" I squeaked, breathing deeply when he let me go. "His name's Jacob father. I've been seeing him..."

Stepping away from him, the entire room was dead silent.

It was then that I saw father do something I had never seen him do before.

Crossing his arms, head tilted, he was …_smiling _at me.

Him staring at me, I felt faint.

No, I was completely petrified.

I had no idea what I just done, but I knew the end result wasn't going to be good.

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**And so the plot thickens. I hope you enjoyed that Jasper/Liz moment.  
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**I'd love to know what you thought about this chapter!  
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	9. Miracle

**AN: Thanks to everyone for their reviews last chapter. If I didn't get to respond to you I apologize. I was sick all last week, but I'm back and have a new chapter for you to all enjoy!**

**I have to thank my room mate for helping me find lyrics when I was completely lost! **

**As always, I just own Liz and my plot line. **

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**Chapter 9: Miracle**

**We've learned to run from  
Anything uncomfortable  
We've tied our pain below and no one ever has to know  
That inside we're broken  
I tried to patch things up again  
To cut my tears and kill my fears  
But have I told you how I..**

**I'm not going  
Cause I've been waiting for a miracle  
And I'm not leaving  
I won't let you  
****Let you give up on a miracle****  
Cause it might save you**

The entire room was silent. So silent that I could practically hear that nervous and anxious breaths that the rest of my family was taking. I wanted to run back to them, my comfort, but I knew that was impossible.

I couldn't, not when father was staring at me with that cold smile. I didn't understand what in the world he was doing. Father _never _smiled at me.

I looked up at him, nervously lacing my hands in front of me as I waited. I knew better than to speak first because father would lash out if I did so.

Finally, he spoke. "What did you say his name was?"

I bit my lip. "Jacob."

His smile grew a little wider. "Jacob Black? He just transferred to your school?"

I wasn't too sure about his last name, but I did know that he was the new transfer student. I nodded slowly. How in god's name did father know that though?

"This is good." He mused. "Yes, very good."

"I…father? I apologize, I…I won't see him again."

His eyes narrowed, the anger I was all too familiar with back once more.

"You will do no such thing you stupid girl!"

I was taken aback by his statement. I was beyond confused now. Father had always been so adamant about me dating boys and now, now it seemed like he was encouraging it. Something wasn't adding up and I had a really bad feeling about it.

"No, you will continue to date this boy Eliza."

My eyes widened as I gawked at him. "Did you not hear me Eliza? Is that why you're staring at me like a fucking child?"

"Why?" I asked before I could think.

"Because," he stepped closer and brushed his hand roughly against my cheek, making me cringe internally. From the corner of my eye I could see Jasper and Edward having a silent conversation while they watched the scene unfolding. "Jacob Black is the son of my new boss. And you dear Eliza will date him. If his son and _my _daughter are to be together that will boast very well for me. And, isn't that what you want? To make sure your father keeps his job. If I am in good with Jacob's father, there's no telling where it'll take me." His voice was disturbingly calm as he spoke and I could tell that he was eerily excited about this. And let me tell you, when father is excited over something, it usually meant the rest of us were about to go through hell. Like I said, father would do _anything _to stay in control of things.

I felt sick, my knees wanting to give out at any second. I should've known! I should've known that this all had to do with father and his constant need to be in control.

"But father" I began, but was cut off when he gripped my wrist tightly. He was always grabbing them and I was surprised that they never broke. Father always knew his limits of where he could go with us. A child with broken bones would certainly not boast well for him so he always stopped right before that could happen.

"I would think twice about trying to disobey your father Eliza." He twisted my wrist and I knew he was two seconds away from snapping it. Of course, he would think of breaking it completely. Spraining it on the other hand was a different story. "Are you not the one who admitted to dating this boy?"

I nodded. "Very well then, I'm just making good out of this fucking situation you've made for yourself. As always, I'm the one forced to clean up all the shit you kids get in to."

_Situation? _God, he was acting like I had just told him I was pregnant or something. Which, I couldn't even fathom what he would do to me if that ever were to happen. He would no doubt try to kill me.

What was I supposed to do, thank him? What else could I do?

"I…of course father." I had no choice but to agree.

"Well," he let go of my wrist "you're not so stupid after all Eliza. Rest assured however, if _one _thing goes wrong in this relationship, you and your ingrate brothers will pay dearly for it."

My brothers? They had nothing to do with this! Of course father would punish all of us if I made some mistake. He had been doing it for years, why would this be any different? As father walked back to the table, me trailing slowly behind him, an idea struck me. An idea that, while it seemed a bit twisted, gave me a little bit of hope. And hope? Hope wasn't something we saw a lot of in this house so I was going to cling on to it desperately and hope that Jasper and Edward would hear me out.

Sitting back at the table, I could tell that they were confused and angry. Well, Jasper was angry while Edward was confused. Edward nudged my side gently when I sat down, casting me a sideways glance that read 'what in the world are you doing?' I shrugged quickly before chancing a look at Jasper. I wasn't too surprised that he was looking right back me, but I was surprised to see the amount of anger he held in his eyes. I wasn't sure what he was angry about. It could've been a lot of things to be honest.

Upset over what we had done, angry with father for hurting me or maybe he was angry with _me. _If he was, I wouldn't blame him. It seemed like I was always getting myself into some kind of trouble. This time however, I felt like this was something that had to be done. It wouldn't just boast well for me, but for my brothers as well. I just hoped that they'd see it that way as well.

I planned on talking to them after dinner so I could tell them just what was going through my mind. I didn't get that chance however. Soon as father and mother left the table, Jasper was just as quickly getting up and trying to make a fast exit.

"Jasper wait," I stood up and came over to where he was "I have to tell you guys something." Reaching out, I touched his hand lightly in hopes of him staying right here with me. His eyes flickered down for a second, before meeting my gaze once more.

He shook his head, hair moving all over the place. I fought back that constant urge to push it all back. Now was not the time for sweet gestures.

"I think it's pretty clear what you're doing Liz, I don't need any further explanation." With that, he left and headed straight towards his room. I knew then that he was angry with me. I stood there for a second, tapping my foot and thought about what to do next. I could go up there and beg for him to listen to me, but I didn't want to do that. We were supposed to be on the same page, not having this constant push and pull.

This time though, I knew it was all my fault. I was just trying to protect Jasper. He was always protecting me, why couldn't I do the same?

Giving up, I started collecting all the plates and glasses off the table so I could clean up. Edward helped me, not saying much.

When I was done washing the dishes, I couldn't take it anymore.

"What are you mad at me too?" I snapped off the water and looked at Edward, who was staring back with an odd expression.

"Why would I be mad at you?" He set down the plate he was drying, wiping his hands on his jeans.

I instantly felt guilty upon hearing Edward's confused voice. I placed my hands on the sink and lowered my head a bit, trying to calm down. I couldn't lash out at Edward, that wasn't fair. Hell, I didn't even know what all I was angry about. There were so many thoughts running through my mind that it felt like my head would explode from everything.

"Liz, tell me." He came closer and rested his hand on my back. "What's going on?"

I didn't answer so he continued. "Are you and Jacob really dating?" There was a trace of hurt in his voice. Almost like he was hurt over the fact that I hadn't told him about this apparent secret relationship I claimed to be in. In all honesty, if I really was dating someone, then Edward would probably be the first to know. I told Edward virtually everything and vice versa. It was just this bond that I had with each of my brothers. A trust that I never intended on breaking.

I let a small laugh pass my lips. "No Edward, we're not dating. I barely know him."

A look of relief crossed his face. "I was wondering why you hadn't told me. We tell each other everything Lizzie so it didn't make sense to me." Oh, how I loved my brother. He hadn't called me Lizzie in years. I loved when he did though. A nickname he had given me when we were younger, when things were so much simpler, took me back to those days.

"Wait, then why did you say you're dating him them?" He was still very much confused. Well, that made two of us.

"His was the first name that popped into my head." I shrugged. And it would be just my luck that father would know _exactly _who I was talking about. Out of all the people in that school….god, that was insane.

"Why would you say his name or anyone's name in the first place?"

"Because," I turned, feeling a bit mortified "I couldn't let Jasper take the blame again."

"The blame for….oh!" He looked closer at me, eyes landing on the mark on the side of my neck. "Oh, Liz." He frowned.

"We were supposed to be careful," I shook my head "guess that didn't happen." Though, as crazy as it sounds, I wouldn't take back this afternoon with Jasper. Even though it looked like I was in so much trouble, the memory of what we did was too great, too emotionally great for me to forget.

A tiny smile graced his lips as he reached out to touch it. It wasn't very big, but it was still noticeable. "Guess Jazz can't keep his lips off of you Liz. You must taste good for him to have done this twice now."

"Edward," I groaned "you're not helping me." I knew he was only trying to make me feel better. He would always make little jokes when things were a bit stressful. While not a natural comedian, his efforts were always much appreciated.

"What Liz? Whatever you and Jasper were doing earlier, the two of you probably just caught up in the moment. It happens."

"Yes I know, but I couldn't tell that to father and you know that Edward."

"Good point, but why not just lie again? Tell him the curling iron thing?"

I scoffed. "He wouldn't have believed me." Father never fell for the same lie twice. He never fell for it the first time most of the time. That and the fact that my hair didn't look like it had been curled in the slightest. At least last time, there had been a slight wave to it.

Edward just nodded. "What are you going to do Liz?"

"I don't know. I don't have much a choice. I have to talk to Jacob."

"No, not about that. I meant about Jasper."

I hadn't even stopped to think about that. Though the things Jasper and I did, the little moments we shared were mostly contained in this house, it was going to be pretty hard to act like I was interested in someone else when I felt so many things for Jasper.

"I have no idea. I really wanted to talk to the both of you, but you saw how fast he left after everything. I know he's angry Edward, but I really think that if I were to convince Jacob to 'date' me, it would work out well for the three of us."

His eyebrows knitted in confusion. "Just how will that work out Liz?"

"If I'm to be with him then that means that father cannot hit me or your two."

He looked me like I was crazy. "Liz, I hate to break it to you but I don't think that if you're with some other guy that father will automatically stop hurting us."

I frowned. "Well, he probably wouldn't do it as often. Think about it Edward. Father wants to get in good with Jacob's father so he will no doubt have to act like the doting father more often and he can't exactly do that if we're walking around with bruises and cuts. He will have to ease up a bit." If anything, he would probably hurt us where no one could see it, but that was better than a black eye any day.

Edward seemed to ponder that for a second. "I don't like it Liz. It's not fair."

I scoffed. "Since when is anything in this damn house fair?"

"Exactly, so why would you want to add more stress? You're already under so much."

"I don't care about the stress, I care about you and Jasper. I want you two to be safe and if being with Jacob means father won't hurt us as bad or as often, then I'm more than willing to do that."

"Risk what you have with Jasper?"

I felt my heart clench a bit. "He…he'll understand. He has to Edward." I knew I was trying to convince myself just as much as I was trying to convince Edward. As much as I knew that I would be doing this for them, there was no telling what Jasper would think.

Yes, there would be risks involved surrounding a variety things, but was that what life was all about? Taking risks? This was a pretty big one, but I was willing to chance it.

"Then talk to him in the morning Liz. I might not agree with it, but I see what you're saying. I think if I was in the same situation, I would probably do the same thing. I'd give up everything to make sure you guys were safe too." I sighed in relief, my brother actually seeing where I was coming from. Even if he didn't like it all that much, he understood why I would do this. I wasn't doing it for selfish reasons, I was doing it to try and help them. Everything I did was because I loved them and wanted to protect them.

"Thank you Edward, it really means a lot to me."

"I know love, I know." He opened his arms and I eagerly accepted his hug. Rubbing my back, he whispered something about things working out and being okay. I really hoped they would. I _needed _them to be alright.

********

Though I went to bed rather early last night, I didn't sleep very well. I tossed and turned, my mind too consumed with thoughts. I was scared and anxious as I showered and got dressed. What if Jasper didn't agree to this? What if he went straight to father and told him the truth? No, he'd never do that right? He wanted to be with me just as badly and wouldn't do something so careless as to risk it.

Then again, he also would do anything to protect me. My only hope was that he heard me out before he decided to do something that only further complicated this situation I had created for myself. A situation that included a boy that I didn't even know. I didn't even want to think about what would happen if Jacob told me no, that I was crazy for asking him to pretend to date me. I really hoped he didn't, but I knew it was a very strong possibility. What guy would be willing to enter a fake relationship with some girl who had just rejected him a few days ago?

The more I thought about it, the more I realized how completely stupid I had been last night. Maybe I should've lied and let father hit me. At least then I wouldn't have had to figure out what the hell I was going to do at this very moment.

I was so nervous and tense that I said virtually nothing to father as I made his breakfast and served him. He watched me, but didn't say anything. He still had that smug smile on his face from last night and it made me absolutely nauseous just thinking about it. Never in my life had I met a person who would use his child to get ahead in his work. Would that even work? For all he knew, Jacob's father could completely hate the fact that we were dating. Oh, how I wished that would happen. If so, then father would make me break it off right away. Sure he claim it to be my fault for not trying, for making a fool of myself but at least I wouldn't have to worry about pretending to be with someone.

He finished his breakfast rather quickly, almost like he was in a rush to get work. Mother joined him a few minutes later and soon the two of them were gone for the day. I was dreading seeing him once he came back from work. For all I knew, he would talk to Jacob's father about the nature of our relationship. If that were the case, then there'd be so much hell to pay when he got back.

After they left, I paced around the kitchen and eventually the living room as I waited for Edward and Jasper to come down so we could go to school.

Edward came down a little after seven, trying to ease my nerves. Try as he may, it didn't help one bit. He eventually sat on the couch and watched me walk around like a crazy person. I alternated between biting my nails and twirling my hair. I only did this when I was extremely nervous. And right now, waiting to see Jasper and talk to him, was completely nerve wracking.

He eventually came down around seven twenty and since we were all ready, we just left to school. The entire way there, I stared out the window and thought about what exactly I could tell Jasper. I could feel him stealing glances at me as he drove, but he never said anything. Edward tried to make idle conversation, but no one was really having any of it. I felt bad for my poor brother. He was just trying to help, but Jasper was being stubborn and I was too nervous to think straight. I was surprised that I had even been able to get dressed this morning, I was that anxiety ridden.

Pulling into the school parking lot, we had a good twenty minutes before we needed to be in class. When I saw Jasper reaching for the door, I leaned forward and touched his shoulder.

"Can you just listen to me for five minutes?" Hand still on the door, he turned to look at me and I once again saw that internal battle. While he hated hurting me he also was angry. After a minute or so, he moved his hand and turned in his seat so that he was looking over at me and Edward. By the look on Edward's face, Jasper could tell that he was already on my side.

"I know you're angry with me Jasper and I don't blame you, but I really think that this will be to all our benefit."

His lips twisted into what resembled a scowl. "Are you fucking crazy?"

I was taken aback. He normally didn't speak to me that way. I knew, well I hoped that it was just his nerves that was making him act this way.

"No," I shot back "I'm trying to keep us safe."

The determination in my voice along with my statement clearly wasn't expected and he took a second to look at me before speaking again. "And just how will you accomplish that Liz?" God, he was being a jerk. He wasn't making this easy that's for sure.

"If father thinks I'm dating this boy, then he can't hurt us as often. Think about it Jasper, he just can't if he wants me to continue 'seeing' him." I avoided mentioning Jacob by name, knowing it'd only upset him further.

"You're willing to be with someone because there's a small chance that he won't beat us as hard?"

I didn't hesitate. "Yes. I wouldn't think twice about doing something that'd protect you boys and you damn well know it." It he was going to give me attitude, then I'd give it right back.

He turned towards Edward. "You're alright with this crazy idea?"

"Not exactly, but I know where she's coming from. You know if it was me or you, we'd probably be doing the same."

"What are you going to tell him?"

"I'm not exactly sure, I need him to talk to me first of all before I can think about anything else."

"If he says no?"

"Then father will know I lied and there'll be hell to pay tonight, but I'm not thinking about that Jasper. I just need to focus on this right now."

"He can't fucking touch you. I saw the way he grabbed your wrist last night Liz, he was so close to breaking it."

I knew he was. I could feel it. "Like I said, I'm willing to take that risk. I just…I need to know that you're okay with it."

"Like hell I'm okay with it. I don't want" he looked over at Edward, pausing for a second "I don't want some guy taking advantage of you Liz."

I leaned in closer, resting my hand on top of his. "He won't. I won't allow that."

Which, I wouldn't. I was already controlled every second by father and I wasn't about to let some guy I didn't know do the same. One was bad enough.

He turned his hand, our fingers lacing for a second. "Fine, but if that asshole tries anything funny I'll beat the shit out of him."

Edward and I laughed. "I doubt it will come down to that."

"You know how I feel about," another pause "people hurting you Liz. It drives me fucking insane."

I sighed. "I know Jasper, but I really think this will be a good thing."

"I don't know about good, but this is your idea and I'll stand by and support. I won't be happy about it, know that now."

"I know you won't, but we'll make it work somehow."

While it seemed odd for Jasper and I to be having this conversation with Edward in the car, neither of us seemed too bothered by it. Not like he wouldn't hear about it later. We talked for a few more minutes before it was time to go to class. We each went our separate ways as the five minute bell sounded. I wandered down the halls to my first class of the day, math, and hoped that I didn't see Jacob walking around. I needed to talk to him yes, but I wasn't ready quite yet. Walking in, I headed straight towards my seat against the wall. As much as math wasn't my forte, I wasn't horrible at it. Being my first class, I was almost always falling asleep about twenty minutes in. Today though, I was practically bouncing in my seat from being so nervous. I really hoped that no one noticed because I didn't want any extra attention on me.

I was thankful that I had Spanish with Edward. Walking in, he immediately sensed my nerves and tried to calm me down. He was talking to me about James and that oddly calmed me down somewhat. We had a pop quiz at the beginning of the period and I just hoped that I was well enough to at least get most of the questions right. My mind was all over the place that I could've really well written my answers in English or gotten everything wrong.

The same thing happened in my other two classes. So distracted in PE that I kept getting hit by the volleyball when I was supposed to be hitting it.

So by the time lunch rolled around, I knew that I needed to speak to Jacob before I keeled over from all these nerves.

As we paid for our lunch, I spotted Jacob sitting at a table across from where we sat. He was surrounded by a group of guys and a few girls. I was really hoping that one of those girls wasn't his girlfriend. Not that I'd be jealous, but because there'd be no way he'd pretend to date me if he was with someone else.

I set the tray down on the table just as Jasper came to sit down with us. I didn't sit down however. Instead I stood there for a few moments, looking at the two of them. They both seemed to know what I was going to do next without me having to say a word.

"You're going to talk to him now?" Jasper didn't seem pleased one bit at the thought of me talking to Jacob.

"Why not?" Better to get it over with right?" I didn't wait for my brother's permission before crossing the cafeteria rather slowly until I reached the table where Jacob and his large group of friends were sitting.

"Um, Jacob?" My heart was racing as he looked up at me, smiling when he saw me. "Can I talk to you for minute?"

He stood quickly, his smile still in place. "Sure, come on." I was a bit surprised that he was coming with me so easily. We walked by Edward and Jasper who were watching with wary eyes. They seemed to be just as nervous as I was.

We walked outside and went towards the back of the school to the parking lot. When he finally stopped and turned to look at me, I suddenly felt nervous. God, I had been such a fool to think I could do this.

"What's up?" He seemed to be waiting patiently for me to start talking. He was leaning against the wall, arms crossed but looked seemingly relaxed.

"I…um, well I know you don't know me, but I have a really big favor to ask you." _Yea that just me sound like a complete idiot. _

He didn't say anything and I grew even more nervous.

Finally though, he laughed. He actually laughed! "I know." That was not the answer I was expecting at all.

What did he mean he knew? How could he possibly know what I was about to ask him? Unless he was a mind reader, he would have no idea. We didn't even know each other for god sakes!

"Your dad called mine last night." My eyes grew wide as saucers. I couldn't believe father had done that! At the same time though, it didn't surprise me. I guess that explained things.

"Jacob, I….well um…what did he say?" I rambled to him and he seemed amused at my flustered expression.

"According to my father, you told yours that you and I are dating." I felt my cheeks flush. "Now, the only reason I could think as to why you'd say that is because you're some obsessive stalker."

My eyes narrowed at him. "I'm not."

He nodded. "That's what I thought. So that's why I agreed."

Wait, he what! "You…agreed to what?"

"My father asked me if you and I were really dating and I said yes."

By instinct I backed away a few feet. "Why would you?"

He shrugged. "I'm not exactly sure why. I mean, for some reason you told your father that you and I are together and now here we are, you claiming you need a favor from me. A favor that I'm pretty sure consists of you and I dating. Or at least pretend to be dating."

This conversation as going in a way different direction than I thought it would. "Will you do it?" I didn't know what else to ask him. He already knew so I figured I just go for it.

"Well," he moved away from the wall "what would be in it for me? I mean, if I'm pretending to date you it's only fair I get something right?"

I eyed him warily. What was he implying? "Look Jacob, I'm not that kind of girl."

He laughed again, stepping even closer to me. I bit my lip when he reached down and took my hand. "That's not what I meant Liz. I'm not that kind of guy either."

I felt relieved. "Then…what do you want?"

"You're a smart girl aren't you?"

Was that a trick question? "No, not really." _At least, not according to father. _

"Are you good in English or Math?"

"What?"

"Those classes, are you good at them?"

"Well uh, English I'm pretty good at." I always got high marks in my English class.

"Well, if I agree to do this whole dating thing then you can help me pass English. My dad will be pissed if I get another bad grade. You know how parents get about grades."

_Oh, you have no idea. _

"That's it?" This didn't seem right. It seemed _too _easy.

"Well not exactly. I think I should get a bit more." I knew it!

"Like?"

"If we're 'dating', then we're going to have to play the part right?"

I hadn't really thought about that. "I guess."

He smirked. "It'd be hard for people to believe if we were never seen together. You know, in front of your parents? Here at school?"

I held up my free hand. "At school?"

"We have to keep up appearances of course. And I'm not going to lie Liz, the other day when you rejected me, I felt like shit. I've been really trying to think of some way to get you to change your mind."

"But Jacob, we wouldn't really be dating…" I was wondering if he wasn't getting that little fact.

"Oh I know, but no one has to know that besides us right?" _Well, Edward and Jasper will know. _

I just nodded. "So, I think it's only fair that we act like a couple at school."

That idea didn't sit well with me at all. I didn't like being the center of attention. It was something he seemed to enjoy though.

"What does acting like a couple mean?"

"Are you serious?" My eyes must've told him I was. "Well, you know little things to make it seem that we actually like each other. Let me hold your hand, have lunch together, I don't know…walk to class together. Lots of things together pretty much."

That didn't seem too bad. I could handle that.

"Our parents might be a different story though."

Oh hell. "I mean, I'm not exactly sure why you even told your dad we were dating, but maybe I'll learn that in time." _Oh, I highly doubt that. Jacob could never know about father or Jasper and I. _

When I didn't answer, he continued. "You'll have to let me hold you close, maybe even kiss you when they're around. Let me do things normal couples would do you know?"

No I didn't know. I had never dated anyone before. "Yea, I get what you're saying." I didn't really though.

"I think that pretty much covers things right?" I found it extremely odd that this was _my _idea and yet, Jacob was taking control of everything. Though I'm sure it wasn't on purpose, something didn't really feel right about all this. The fact that he was agreeing so easily was almost unsettling. As relieved as I was that he said yes, something was nagging at me to ask more. I couldn't though. I couldn't blow this chance I had.

"Yes, deal?" I shook my hand out of his grasp and held it out to him. He stared at my hand for a second before looking back up at me.

"Liz, if we're going to make this work you're really going to have to act like we're dating."

"Yes, I know that."

"Well, couples don't shake hands." He took my hand, only to bring me closer to him. He instantly wrapped his arms around me and I tentatively did the same. We stood like that for a minute or so, his face somewhat buried in my hair. Each time he took a breath, I felt it by my ear. As I stood there, I realized just how strong he was and there was no denying the fact that he smelt good. Other than that though, things seemed a bit awkward. I guess that was to be expected, being as we didn't know each other. Guess that was all about to change.

"We'll start slow okay?" He pulled away, wrapping an arm around my shoulders.

I nodded as we began walking back.

"Don't worry babe," he stopped as we got closer and turned me so I could face him "it'll be okay."

I felt the sincerity in his words, but I didn't exactly understand them. What was that supposed to mean? Could he tell that I was scared and nervous? Did he think I was completely crazy?

We walked back into the cafeteria, a few heads turning our way when he did. His arm slipped off my shoulders.

"I'll call you later Liz." He winked and I gave him a small smile back. Guess it was time for the charade to begin. Some not so discreet flirting in front at school that would eventually lead up to us being 'together.' I wasn't too familiar with how this whole dating process worked, but I was pretty sure it'd make more sense for us to 'casually' build up to dating than it would be to just come out and say we were a couple. I didn't have many friends, but Jacob did and they would know something was up if we did that.

I sat back at the table with only a few minutes left to spare. Edward and Jasper looked at me with worried and expectant eyes.

"He said yes." Was all I said. I honestly didn't want to talk about it right now. I needed to be alone and try and process everything.

Jasper leaned in closer. "You don't seem too pleased."

Well how the hell was I supposed to feel? I had gotten myself in this situation, so now I was just going to have to deal with it.

I shook my head, my eyes cast down. "Everything's going to be okay, I know it will."

I didn't know anything. I was just hoping that this situation wasn't about to come back and slap me in the face.

I _needed _this to work, plain and simple.

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**As of this chapter, things in this story are about to go in a completely different direction than originally intended. Which, I'm totally okay with that. This is a creative process after all.  
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**So, let me know what you think of this new development. Also, feel free to check out the new blog I've started. The link is on my profile & I'll be putting up little snippets and sneak peaks for this story as well as for my other ones. **


	10. How I Feel

**AN: Thank you to everyone who reviewed last chapter, you all keep me going! It was interesting to see people's reactions to newest addition to this story. From this point on, Jacob _will _be a pretty vital character in this story. Hope everyone will stick with me know that they know that! **

**Thanks to my room mate, she helped me with the lyrics. Thanks hun!**

**As always, all I own is Liz & my plot line. **

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**Chapter 10: How I Feel  
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**Oh, I'm getting tired of believing  
Even sicker of pretending  
That it's not so bad, just wait it out  
Oh, I think you're feeding me lies again  
The only good man left wasn't him  
And that's how I feel right now so just let me be  
Let me be**

**Jasper**

You can tell a lot about a person by the mere expressions on their face.

And by the way Liz was obviously avoiding looking at us it was safe to say that she was fucking scared out of her mind. It was evident that she had no idea what the hell she was doing. She had no experience with dating nor with the way the minds of guys our age worked.

Granted I didn't know this Jacob Black, but it wasn't hard to figure him out. He was the popular type, the type that loved messing with innocent girls like Liz. When she told us that he agreed, I knew she was fucked. A guy like him was only after one thing, not matter what he told her.

I wanted her to tell me every single damn detail of what happened outside, but another part of me refused to listen to any of it. My mind wanted to shutdown and not think of anything that involved those two together.

Being as I wasn't taking the initiative to say or ask anything, Edward decided to.

Leaning forward, he placed his hand on Liz's. "What did you tell him?"

She merely shrugged. "It didn't even matter, he had already agreed before I came to talk to him."

That caught my attention.

She paused a moment before continuing, her eyes cast down the entire time she spoke. "Apparently father called his last night and when Jacob's father asked him if it was true he said it was."

That made no sense what so ever. Why would this guy, who barely even knew Liz, agree to something like that? It only proved the point that he was after something. Something that I'm quite sure that involved sex.

Well, if that asshole thought he was getting anything from Liz, he was dead wrong.

"Why would he do that?"

"I don't know, he wouldn't really tell me much."

"Liz, I don't have a good feeling about this." I glanced over at my brother, his eyes clouded with fear for our sister. "Maybe…maybe you should rethink it."

"And what, have father hurt the two of you over something I started? There's no way…there's no way I'm doing it." The bell sounded just as she finished. With a squeeze of her hand, we all stood up at almost the exact same time. Edward went one way while Liz and I walked towards Biology.

She knew I wasn't happy about this. I didn't even have to say anything, she could see it written all over my face. For I think the first time, I honestly wished that she couldn't tell what I was thinking by simply looking me in the eyes.

When we walked in there was boxes of slides on each of the tables, meaning that we had a lab today. Which meant that I would hopefully be distracted for the next fifty minutes.

At least, I hoped so.

Liz seemed to still be out it from lunch and I had not the slightest clue as to what to tell her. What could I tell her anyways? This had been her idea yes, but it was my fucking fault. Oh she didn't blame me for what happened, but I'm the one who couldn't keep the control.

It's virtually impossible to form a coherent sentence when I'm with Liz, let alone think clearly when she's completely naked and practically inviting me to kiss her.

Fuck that, I lose all my logical reasoning when I'm with her.

Lost in thoughts, I barely heard and saw Liz getting up and walking towards the front of the class where the microscopes were. What I did see however was Liz struggling to reach one of them when someone much taller helped her out. Bringing it down, he handed it to her and smiled. She hesitantly smiled back at him before coming back to the table. The guy turned around as well and I fought back my smirk.

I should've known.

I remained silent as Liz and I worked on our assignment which consisted of naming various types of slides. She did most of the work, her hair falling over her face when she looked at each slide. I thought back to the way her hair felt in my fingers as she worked me, doing things I never would've pictured or imagined her doing. _Things she had only done for me and only me. _

Her lips pursed when she wasn't sure of what she saw, making me think about just how sweet she had tasted. I'd never get tired of those full lips. They were such a fucking drug to me and if there wasn't a room full of people around us, I'd kiss her senseless right now because no matter how pissed off I was, it wasn't at her. I don't think I could ever find it in me to be angry with her.

Just like she would do _anything _to protect Edward and I. No matter what we told her, nothing was going to change her mind. Liz was rather stubborn when she wanted to be. She was relentless and would make sure that if she could, she would make sure father didn't lay his hands on us as often.

When she quietly asked me to help her and her neck would twist a certain way, I was able to make out the small mark on the side of her throat. I hadn't even realized that I had done it. So caught up in the moment that I all I saw and felt was her.

However, something also fired up in me each time I saw it. Something that wasn't pleasant at all. For each time I looked at her, I just knew that Jacob was watching her as well. Watching her with a smug smile no doubt. Who did this fucker think he was?

It was then that I pinpointed the emotion running through my system.

Jealously.

If Liz and this boy were to be 'dating,' then who's to say he wouldn't try anything? Wouldn't try and do something that would mark her as _his_?

She wasn't his though.

She couldn't, not when I had this desperate desire for her to be _mine_.

Fuck, this was a bad idea. I don't care what father did, but nothing could be any worse than having to watch this fake relationship unfold between them.

My brief understanding of why she was doing this disappeared the second I confirmed that Jacob was in fact staring over at Liz. I wanted to walk right up to him and demand to know what the hell his problem was. Why he was doing this when he knew nothing about Liz. As far as I knew, the only interaction those two ever had was that day here in the class room where he tried to get her to go out with him.

Shit. That's when it hit me. God, Jacob wasn't so stupid after all. He had very publicly been rejected by Liz in front of the entire class and I'm sure that didn't sit well with him. So when the opportune moment arose, in effect giving him a second chance, he fucking took it without hesitation. He probably didn't even care as to why Liz had said they were dating, he was too eager to get with her to pay attention to the small details.

"Jasper?" My train of thought was broken and I turned my attention back to Liz. She was looking at me with a confused look. "Can…can you help me?"

I wondered how long I had been ignoring her. I nodded and she showed me the slides she had trouble identifying. We worked like that for the last ten minutes of the period before it was time to clean everything up. Since she got it, I took the microscope back and returned the box of slides. In those few minutes, for those few seconds that Liz was by herself, Jacob was at her side.

I caught the end of their conversation. "I'll call you later babe." He smiled, tucking a piece of paper in his pocket. He sent me a look as he walked back to his table.

"Did you just give him your phone number?" I asked my sister as the bell rang as we headed out to gather our things.

"Um, yes? Isn't that what you do when you're going to date someone?" She seemed confused all over again. Jesus Christ, she really had no clue what she was getting herself into.

"Technically, but you aren't really going to be dating him remember?"

"Yes, I know." We reached our lockers, swapping books. "But how will he be able to get in contact with me?"

"He'll see you at school. That should be enough. You really think father will let your so called boyfriend call the house whenever the hell he feels like it?" I slammed the locker shut, Liz jumping at the sound. Feeling like a complete asshole for having scared her, I apologized for it. I had completely forgotten that any little noise sets her off, makes her jumpy.

"I don't know Jasper, he asked for it so I gave it to him. I don't know what I'm doing. I'm figuring it out as I go along." Well fuck of course she didn't know what she was doing. Father always has had this rule of Liz never being able to date anyone and now all the sudden, he was forcing her to continue to date someone who she didn't even know. She had just blurted out his name in the heat of the moment, scared shitless over what father would've done if he knew the truth.

I would've tried to protect her of course, had he dared tried to do something horrible to her, but even I knew I wouldn't have been much help. We'd both suffer. Hell, even Edward would suffer too. It was a never ending cycle with father. That bastard was relentless, we all knew it.

I didn't answer her as we walked out to the parking lot. Luckily, Edward was there by himself. Even after that talk we had, I still wasn't keen on him being so friendly with that James guy. Not that I had anything against it, but we all knew the hell we'd have to pay if something ever got back to father. That man had eyes all over. Sometimes I wondered if he even had people watching us here.

We drove back home in relative silence, neither of us really knowing what to say to the other. I knew that Edward was on Liz's side, he always was. Which, I didn't blame him. Those two were way closer than he and I were. It wasn't that I was jealous of that because god only knows that Liz and I had our own bond going, but it would've been nice for once Edward to actually look at the situation from all sides. He saw what Liz told him and that was pretty much it.

He didn't see the pain that it could end up causing not only her, but all of us. We didn't know how long Jacob was going to go along with this façade, this lie. For all we knew, he'd call it off in a week or two. Father's warning from last night still stuck in my head. His threatening the three of us that if something were to go wrong in their relationship, we were all going to have to pay. Which, how much sense did that fucking make? Edward and I weren't 'dating' this guy. Then again, this was father. When one kid 'screwed' up, we all did. It had always been this way so why would this be any different?

I hated not knowing what was going to happen. I knew nothing about this guy and yet, he was suddenly an extremely vital piece in this mind fuck of a puzzle. One wrong move from him and it would all very well blow up in our faces.

I wondered if Liz realized that when she said his name, or had she been too concerned with the idea of protecting Edward and I? My guess it was the latter part. That's all she was ever thinking about, always putting the two of us before herself.

That wasn't the sort of life someone her age should have to live. She should be out there enjoying life instead of coming up with ways to make sure we didn't get hurt as bad. She didn't even know if this was going to work. For all we knew, father would hit harder in non-visible places from now on.

My mind was all over the place that after we got home and I knew Liz was in her room, I went over to talk to Edward. He'd understand, he'd tell me what the hell I needed to do. It didn't matter who was close or whose side he was on, Edward was my rock. He was my brother.

He didn't seem too surprised when I walked into his room. He was sitting at his desk, papers already scattered about and his journal in hand. I swear that guy was always writing something. He never showed me what was in there, but that was alright. What he wrote was obviously private and I had no right to pry. In this house, we took what little privacy we could find.

"I have to talk to you."

He lifted an eyebrow and set down his journal. "I know Jazz." He shook his head. Right, should've known.

"Edward, I honestly have no idea what the hell is going on anymore."

"Me either. I mean, I heard what Liz had to tell me last night and then again this morning, but I'm still not so sure it's a good idea."

"Then why didn't you tell her that?"

"You know she wouldn't have listened anyways. She had her mind set the second she said she was dating Jacob. Which, that makes no sense either. She doesn't even know him all that well."

Sighing, I leaned against the wall and looked at my brother. "He's trying to work her, Edward. I just know he is. Guys like him don't just agree to something without wanting something major in return."

"You don't think he'll take advantage of her do you? Liz…she's too innocent, she wouldn't have any idea…"

"He better not take advantage of her, I'll kick his ass if he so much as thinks about it."

"Do you think he's really going to go along with this fake relationship thing? It's all odd to me."

"She has no idea what she's getting into. She doesn't know how to handle these kinds of things, Edward. She's never dated anyone before. We don't even know if this will work out."

"She's got her mind set that it will help all of us. Which, that would be great, but not at her expense. She shouldn't have to pretend to date someone just so father may or may not hurt us worse than he already does."

"She shouldn't pretend to date anyone at all."

Something seemed to click in Edward's mind. "This has a lot to do with you and Liz doesn't it?"

I glared at him. Well no shit it had a lot to do with the two of us.

"How can I watch her date some other guy Edward?" Granted, there could never be a way to be public about how we felt, but still.

"She's not going to be really be dating him, Jazz."

That's when the thought hit me. "What if they really do though?"

"I don't…what do you mean?"

"What if Liz realizes that she really likes this guy and they actually start dating? God, I don't think I could fucking handle that, I really don't."

"Why would you even think that?" He seemed amused.

"It's possible, Edward. For all we know this guy will sweep Liz off her feet, make her fall in love or some shit."

"Oh, I highly doubt that Jasper."

"Why are you so god damn calm about this?" I wanted to shout at him, slap some sense into my brother. Did he not get what I was saying?

"That won't happen because Liz won't see Jacob in that light. If anything, he'll be her friend. She…she wants you, not anyone else."

That didn't exactly reassure me. "How can I be so sure?"

"You think she'd be doing this if she didn't? You think she'd risk all her happiness if she didn't want you? Sure she's doing it for me as well, but lots of the things Liz does are for you."

He had a point there. "Fuck, this is just too complicated."

"When have our lives not been complicated?"

"You're right about that. So, you're basically telling me that I have to sit back and watch this all unfold?"

"Basically. Who knows Jasper, maybe it will really work. Maybe father won't hurt us as badly or as often. You never know."

"I don't know Edward. We aren't exactly the fortunate ones in this household."

He frowned. "We are actually. Look at what a selfless sister we have, Jasper. Tell me, what girl would put herself in that situation for the sake of protecting her brothers?"

When I didn't respond, he just nodded. "My point exactly. We _are _fortunate Jasper, just not in typical ways."

"How do you do that Edward?"

"Do what?"

"No matter what, you can always calm me the fuck down with your little talks."

"I'm just telling you the truth. I'm a more keen observer than you and Liz are. Sometimes when things are right in front of you, you both seem to overlook it. That's where I come in."

"Well, thank god for that." I removed myself from the wall and hugged him. "I have no idea what I'd do without you."

"Yea, yea I know."

I left the room and headed towards mine where I spent the next hour or so working on new assignments. Every now and then my mind would drift towards Liz and this new situation she was in now. As much as I hated it, I was more concerned about her getting hurt than anything else. If this Jacob guy hurt her, I'd lose it. I honestly would. Father was one thing, but I had no problem making him pay if he hurt my sister.

She already endured so much and she didn't need any more pain.

I anxiously awaited father's arrival. Surely he would've had a chat with Jacob's father today. Only father would do something so twisted as forcing his daughter to date his boss's son. And leave it up to Liz to name the one person in that entire school who father actually knew.

He and mother seemed to be in relatively good mood when they arrived home. Of course that all could change in a blink of an eye.

After Liz served everyone, she took her usual seat beside Edward and threw me a glance. In the few seconds that my eyes met hers, I got the sense that she was completely petrified at the moment. I wished I could do something for her, help ease her nerves somehow, but I couldn't. She knew that, she was just looking for reassurance. Well hell I didn't have that for her either. However, I could fake reassurance. Even if I didn't believe it, sometimes all Liz needed was a little nod or smile and she would feel better. I think she knew sometimes that my reassurance wasn't real, but she took it anyways.

Like Edward said, we take things in whatever way we can get them. A curt nod was all she needed for the moment before she quietly started eating. Well, more like poked around at her food. I knew that Liz had a bit of an obsession with her weight and it was all because of our father. If he wasn't constantly telling her things, she probably could eat without worrying about gaining weight. In all honesty, she needed to. She was getting too skinny again, to the point where not only people would start to notice but it wasn't good for her health.

If she wasn't strong enough, the bruises would stay longer and she would take a longer period of time to get over a slap here or kick there.

As I watched her I just silently hoped that she wasn't taking any drastic measures to maintain her 'perfect' weight. Liz was a lot of things, but stupid wasn't one of them. No, my sister had the common sense to not do anything like that. Just in case though, I was going to have Edward talk to her. She'd never tell me and I didn't exactly know how to go about it. Maybe it was because they had a stronger bond or the fact that he was gay, I have no idea, but Liz would tell him the truth.

Things were going alright until about halfway through the dinner. The phone started ringing and no one made a move to go answer it. No one ever called during dinner and we weren't exactly sure what to do.

"Well, is someone going to get that?" Father lifted an eyebrow at our mother and she was quickly out of her seat, answering the phone with a rushed "Hello?"

After a minute, she back. "Eliza, darling you have a phone call."

All eyes came to rest on her as her eyes widened in surprise and confusion. Had she forgotten already that she had given that boy her phone number?

"Don't just sit there Eliza, get up you stupid girl." At the sound of father's voice, she was up in a second and off towards the living room.

All we could hear was her part of the conversation.

"Oh, hi Jacob. Um, I'm fine thank you. Oh yes I'd love to."

She was just spitting out answers to god only knows what he was asking her.

After another minute or two, they wrapped it all up. "Alright, I see you tomorrow Jake." There was a brief pause before she laughed lightly. "Ok then, night."

Liz walked back in, eyes cast down as she picked at her nails. A nervous trait she did once in awhile.

"Eliza, come." Father was calling her before she even sat down. She hesitantly walked over to where father was already standing. "Who was that young lady?"

What was he deaf? He knew exactly who it was.

"It was Jacob, father." Her voice was barely above a whisper as she stood near me.

Our father simply smirked. "I see. Well next time your boyfriend decides to call here, make sure he calls at an appropriate time do you understand me?"

"Yes, I'll let him know."

"Eliza did you just hear what I said?" His voice increased a fraction. "You will not tell him that, but you better make damn sure he doesn't call during this hour again."

What the fuck? How the hell was she going to that? God, our father had a really cynical way of thinking.

"I heard you father. Maybe…maybe I just didn't understand?"

"You never understand anything do you Eliza? I swear you're like a child sometimes." In a second, his hand was raised and I knew he was fully prepared to slap her across her face for being 'incompetent.' However, before the back of his hand could come in contact with her cheek, her suddenly lowered it, instead grabbing her upper arm roughly.

We all watched in shock. Father _never _veered from where he was going to hit us.

Gripping her tighter, he brought her closer. "That boy is to never call at this hour again, do you understand me?" He enunciated each word slowly, treating Liz like she was stupid and incapable of keeping up.

She winced when she he twisted her arm before she responded. "Of course father, I'll make sure of it."

He released her quickly, her hand coming up to rub her arm.

"Good, now sit down." He waved his hand at her and she sat as quickly as she could.

I watched as she moved her arm in tiny circles, trying to break apart some of the pain. It didn't exactly take it away, but it seemed to be working.

As I continued to watch her, I realized something.

I realized that Liz very well be right about this fake relationship.

I don't father had ever done what he did just now before. He was always so precise, so he knew hitting Liz on her face would cause major questioning with the new boyfriend, but also wasn't about leave her unmarked. So he went for a spot where no one would see it.

As ruthless as that was, Liz was suffering less because of it.

Which meant that if she continued to 'see' Jacob, then maybe father was ease up on us a bit.

Fuck, our lives were about to get even more twisted if that were the case.

If Liz saw her plan working, who knows how far she was going to take it.

In order to protect all of us, she was about to risk everything.

I wasn't sure if I could just sit by and watch that happen and not say anything.

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**Your thoughts, as always, are greatly appreciated. **

**Jasper had some thoughts this chapter that you will definitely see come in to play again later in the story. **


	11. See Who I Am

**AN: Thank you to my amazing reviewers last chapter, I fully appreciate it! This is my longest chapter thus far for this story and I hope you enjoy it! It's the first time that we're getting some Jacob POV. **

**As always, all I own is Liz and my plot line. **

**

* * *

****Chapter 11: See Who I Am**

**Come into my world,  
See through my eyes.  
Try to understand,  
Don't want to lose what we have.**

**We've been dreaming  
But who can deny?  
It's the best way of living  
Between the truth and the lies**

**Liz**

Over the next few days, I felt myself constantly on nerves end. After that episode with father and his immediate change of pace, I knew that there was no way I could give up on this act now. The second his hand moved from my face to my arm, everything became as clear as night to me.

Father knew that hitting my face would raise questions, especially with my 'boyfriend.' So instead he grabbed me, bruised me somewhere no one would be able to see.

Though the situation was rather twisted, I couldn't help but feel somewhat relieved. I wasn't even sure that my plan would work, but I had been desperately holding onto the hope that it would.

After that first encounter with Jacob, things had been slowly building between us. He would say hi to me when I walked through the halls, spoke to me before our class started and I could feel his eyes on me throughout the period.

Even though this was my plan, I felt like he was putting forth more of an effort than I was.

There were a few reasons as to why that was though.

For one, I had absolutely no idea what I was doing here. My lack of dating knowledge put me at an extreme disadvantage. However, something I did have was the ability to placate someone in a matter of seconds. Years of dealing with father and his ever constant mood shifts meant I was always ready, always prepared to say what was needed to stop a situation from escalation to worse.

Though it didn't feel that way sometimes, I knew that my placating father sometimes lessened the blow. I would rather endure a slap to the face than a punch to the ribs.

The mere thought disgusted me. I shouldn't even have to be thinking about these kinds of things, but yet here I am, here _we _all are.

The fear, the power that father held over us was almost unbearable sometimes, to the point that neither myself nor my brothers could even breathe comfortably around him. It was like we were always walking on pins and needles around him. One wrong move or look and everything could blow up in our faces.

The one thing we were always trying to avoid was the one thing we could never escape.

That's why, regardless of how clueless and scared I am, I _have _to stick to the plan. A plan that practically revolves around a boy who I still really don't know all that much and yet, he's doing it without asking for too much.

I know that Jasper isn't pleased in the slightest. In fact, it's safe to say that he is beyond angry over the entire situation. I really wished he wasn't though. I wanted him to see this for the good it could bring us, instead of hating every second of it.

Another part of me knows that he has every right to be angry though. He and I had just started to be…well, I'm not exactly sure what the two of us are, but there's definitely something there between the two of is.

Though we can never act on these feelings in public, it doesn't make it any easier on Jasper. Hell, it's no walk in park for me either.

It was Friday now, the end of yet another week and I was physically and mentally exhausted. I just hoped that it wasn't always going to be like this.

During lunch, I hadn't been sitting there very long, neither Edward nor Jasper saying much. I knew Edward was still thinking about that little encounter with James in Spanish. I personally thought it was adorable the way the both of them got completely flustered around each other. They seemed like a perfect match, but I knew that Edward would never do much about it. He was too scared of what would happen. I didn't blame him though. Even with this whole being with Jake thing, I was terrified that something was going to slip and everything would fall apart.

Jasper wasn't saying much because well, he didn't say a whole lot to me these days. Well, at least at school he didn't.

I had just reached over to grab something off our tray when I felt a strong hand on my shoulder. It was warm and I could feel it even through my sweater. I watched my brothers, their expressions stoic and cold. Finally with a sigh, I turned around and saw Jake standing right behind me, a small smile on his face.

**Jacob**

I approached their table, not exactly knowing what to do. From the looks on her brother's faces when they saw me, I knew that this wasn't going to be a walk in the park. I didn't know much about them, hell I didn't even know a whole lot about Liz, but I could tell that they were both very protective about their sister. Which, this was going to make things a hell of a lot harder.

I touched her shoulder and after a moment, she turned to look at me. I smiled and she gave me a hesitant one back. I briefly debated whether to ask to sit with them or ask her to come with me, but the way they were still staring at me, especially the blonde one, I knew I wouldn't be welcome.

"Hey Liz, I was wondering if you wanted to come sit with me and some of my friends?"

"Um," she looked over at her brothers and I was positive she was going to deny me "sure." She stood, grabbing her bag and mumbling something quickly to her brothers.

Knowing holding her hand would be too soon, I opted to just wrap an arm around his shoulders. She tensed a little, but she didn't pull away either. We crossed the room, earning glances here and there from students. Some smiled, some whispered loudly about us. Good, they needed to start rumors. If Liz and I were going to be 'dating' then people here were going to have to think it too.

I led her to the table, where a group of the guys were already sitting. Some of them with their girlfriends and some of them just there.

"Here babe, sit." I pulled out her chair for her.

"Thanks Jake." She sat down, crossing her legs and pushing some of her behind her ears.

"You guys know Liz right?" I sat beside her, my arm gently draping over the back of her chair.

No one really said anything and that sort of pissed me off. I glanced at my friends, glaring at them. I knew I wasn't top dog or anything here, but I thought they'd be a bit nicer to her and not acting like a bunch of jerks. Even the girls weren't saying anything. They all seemed…cold towards Liz. What the hell?

"Yea, we know of her." Someone finally spoke and both Liz and I looked over at him. It was Paul, the sort of asshole of the group. Don't get me wrong, he was cool guy, but he was just a bit rough around the edges. I was still getting used to his antics.

"Jake dude I know you're new here and all that, but haven't you heard the rumors about her?" He was talking to me as if Liz wasn't sitting right there next to me.

I didn't answer him. What the hell was I going to say to that? He kept going though.

"Her and her two brothers over there," he nodded across the room "they do everything together. They don't talk to anyone else, don't sit with anyone else. It's always just the three of them. A trio of freaks, especially the one with brown hair, he's fucking weird man." He shook his head, clearly disgusted over something.

From beside me, I heard a sharp intake of breath. From the corner of my eye, I saw Liz staring straight over towards Paul, a look of disbelief on her face.

"You don't even know us. Why are you saying such hurtful things?" Her voice was barely above a whisper.

"They're not hurtful when it's the truth, sorry to burst your little bubble."

She opened her mouth to say something, but he cut her off. "Jake, what the hell are you doing with her man? If I were you, I'd stay the fuck away from her….she's hot I'll give you that, but she isn't worth your time man. Her looks don't hide the fact that she's a freak, Jake."

Liz's hands were now twisted in her lap and she looked painfully uncomfortable. Shit. I had no idea what the hell Paul was doing. She didn't deserve to be attacked like this, they didn't even know her. I didn't know her all that well either, but she seemed like a nice enough girl.

"Paul, do you even know them? Have you ever take the time to talk to them?"

He scoffed. "Like I'd want to be seen with them."

"Well you better get used to it." I spat. "Liz isn't going anywhere."

He glared at me, like I had just punched him. "What the hell are you talking about?"

I had enough of this shit and I was about to stop it. "Liz, are you busy later tonight?"

She turned towards me, a confused look on her face. "Um, no. Why?"

"Would you like to do something later? Go see a movie or something?"

"I…well, I have to check with my father, but I think that should be fine."

"Is that a yes?"

She nodded.

Glaring at the people at the table, they all seemed shocked. Like they honestly thought what Paul had to say was going to affect me. I didn't work that way.

The bell rang and I stood at the time as Liz did. "Come on," I wrapped an arm around her shoulders once again, "let's get to class. Oh and Paul?" I turned to look at the table. "Next time keep your fucking opinions to yourself alright? That shit isn't cool and makes you look like a complete idiot."

We left, Liz not saying anything as we walked out of the cafeteria. I saw her glancing back to where her brothers were, but didn't say a word.

It wasn't until we were almost to class that she spoke.

"You didn't have to defend me, Jacob."

"Of course I did. It's my job." I gave her shoulders a squeeze before letting her go. She looked at me, probably trying to decide if I was being sarcastic or not.

After a minute, she just nodded. "Thank you." Her voice was soft, sweet and I couldn't understand how anyone could say anything bad about this girl.

"I'm serious about that movie later, so I'll see you at like six thirty or so?"

Her eyes widened a fraction, but she nodded quickly before walking away.

I couldn't put my finger on it, but there was something about Liz that intrigued me and it went way beyond her looks.

Guess I'd try and find out tonight.

**Liz**

Our last class passed in almost a blur. I was still reeling over what Jacob's friend had said. Right in front of me no less! Did people not have manners anymore? I hated the things he was saying. He didn't know me or my brothers so he had no right to say those hurtful things.

Though I fully appreciated Jacob defending me, I wanted nothing more than to punch that Paul guy. He was smug, rude and I didn't like him at all.

I had bigger things to worry about though. I was now going out on a 'date' with Jacob sometime later tonight and not only did I have no clue what to do, but I also didn't know how the people in my household were going to react.

It was nerve-wracking, the mere thought of it.

Working on our lab, Jasper and I talked about everything _except _lunch. I knew he had questions, but I didn't know if I would have the answers that he wanted to hear.

The class, for the first time, was over far too quickly and I could feel my hands shaking as we left the school and headed back home.

"What's wrong Liz?" Edward noticed my semi-panicked state right away.

I knew I had to tell them right then. "I have…a date." God, even the word was completely foreign to me.

My brothers didn't say anything the rest of the trip home and as soon as we got home, they were both gone, leaving me all alone in the living room.

I honestly didn't know what to do about them. I could talk and tell them all I wanted, but I couldn't force them to accept what I was doing. No matter how hard I tried, it was something they would have to accept on their own.

I knew that Edward was almost there, him being on the same page as me. But Jasper, he was a completely different story. That boy was so stubborn that there was no way I could convince him of something once his mind was already set.

Before my date, I first needed to ask permission. Even though father thought Jacob and I were already dating, this would be the first time I'd actually have to ask him about going out.

I picked up the phone and dialed the number with still shaky fingers. We never called father at work, for fear of stirring up anger when he got home. But, I had to. I couldn't just leave and not be here when he got home. That would just be hell of all of us.

I leaned against the counter in the kitchen as I waited for him to pick up.

He did after three rings, his voice professional and stern.

"Father, it's Eliza." I mustered all my strength, praying he wouldn't grow angry with me.

He was silent for a minute or two before he spoke. "What do you want Eliza?"

Even over the phone, he struck fear in my veins. "I…I called to ask your permission for something?"

"Well, spit it out young lady. I don't have all day."

"Jacob asked me out on a date, father. I was just calling to see if that would be alright?"

He laughed coldly. "Of course, Eliza. What sort of idiotic question is that?"

"I'm sorry father, you're right. I just wanted to make sure."

"It's fine." With that he hung up the phone, the line going dead. I glared at the phone, sighing as I placed it back on the receiver.

Well, at least he didn't seem to upset with me when I asked.

With that off my list I knew the next thing was to decide on what to wear. I glanced down at my school attire and knew that I couldn't wear the same thing.

Though I had a few hours, I practically ran upstairs, knocking on Edward's door quickly. He opened it after a few moments, leaning against the door frame.

I smile sheepishly. "Can you help me? I need to pick out something to wear."

He laughed, wrapping an arm around me. "Of course." We walked over to my room and I was immediately in my closet, pulling out things and throwing them at Edward.

"Nothing too dressy right?"

He shook his head. "No. You're going to a movie, so you should wear jeans."

I pulled out a clean pair, tossing them on the bed. "Top?"

"Well how much do you want to tease him?"

I froze, turning to glare at my brother. "There will be no teasing going on."

He laughed. "If you say so, but it doesn't matter what you'll be wearing. He's hooked already."

Brushing off his comment, I grabbed a few shirts and showed them to him. He axed the first too, saying they were too boring. I finally decided on a dark purple short sleeve top that was long enough to cover the bruise. I paired it with a black sweater and black flats.

"Simple and chic, just like you." Edward nodded, clearly pleased with his choice.

"Thank you, I'm completely lost." I sighed, sitting on the bed next to him. "Is this all going to be okay Edward?"

He shrugged. "I don't know, Liz. It might be, or not. Like you said, we just have to wait and see right?"

I nodded.

"You look gorgeous. Jacob won't be able to take his eyes off of you. Regardless if it's not a real date, your beauty shines through either way."

We talked for the next hour or so while I waited around for Jacob to come by. Edward told me a few things, 'tips' he called them, but he didn't really have that much experience either.

The one who did have experience probably wouldn't tell me anything . Which, that was fine by me. I didn't want to push Jasper any further than I already had.

Finally around six, Jacob called me and asked for directions to my house. He, like he told me, was ringing the doorbell at exactly six thirty.

I made Edward come downstairs with me, feeling nervous and terrified. While Edward found it amusing, I felt like I was going to be sick.

"You'll be fine." Edward kissed my forehead and I went to open the door.

Dressed in jeans, a white t-shirt and a black jacket I looked up to find Jacob smiling, almost nervously, at me.

"Wow. You look…really beautiful Liz."

"Um, thanks." I wasn't sure how to respond to that. No one ever told me those things. Other than my brothers of course.

"Are you ready?"

I nodded, said a quick goodbye to Edward before I walked outside to Jacob's car. He opened the door for me, getting in on his side shortly after.

Our conversation was short and quiet as we drove downtown to the movie theater. I hadn't been there in years, but I still knew where it was.

Getting out of the car, he walked rather close to me and I was certain he was going to try and take my hand in his. He didn't and I was somewhat relieved.

"So, what'll it be?" He asked as he stopped in front of the theater.

I glanced up at him and shrugged lightly. "Whatever you'd like to see."

He laughed, waving his hand at me. "No, you pick."

I hesitantly looked up at the list of movies, trying to decide on one. I hadn't really watched much television so I didn't know what half of these movies were about and I didn't want to pick just any random one.

Scanning the titles one more time, one of them caught of my eye. I remember hearing Edward talking about it last week.

"Night terror?" I questioned casually and his eyes almost doubled in size. It was rather comical and he sort of reminded me of a surprised puppy. "What?"

"You're into those kinds of movies?"

I smiled. "Of course."

Thinking he was going to call me crazy, I prepared myself for it. Instead, I got a strong arm wrapped around my shoulder.

"You may very well be my soul mate, Liz." I glanced up at him, not sure if he was speaking the truth or just being sarcastic. "I love these kinds of moves."

I nodded, walking with him so he could buy the tickets before we entered the theater.

"Do you want anything to eat?" We were heading towards the concession stand and I shook my head quickly. "Come on, not even some candy?

Not wanting to cause argument, I just gave in and let him buy me all kinds of things. I half hoped that he would eat most of it, but another part of me wanted to eat everything in sight.

It had been years since I had eaten popcorn or candy. I don't even remember the last time I had been to see a movie in an actual theater.

We entered the theater, it already half full, and headed towards the top.

We sat in the middle of the row, surrounded by couples and friends. They were talking amongst themselves and the closer I looked, I could see that most of them were sitting closely together, some holding hands and other with their arms across the back of the seats.

I panicked for a second. What was I going to do if Jacob tried something like that once the movie started? Would I let him do whatever, or should I tell him something before anything happened?

I decided against the latter, knowing it'd only make me look like a fool. Just because I had no dating experience, didn't mean I had to openly show it.

There were only a few minutes before the show started and before the lights dimmed, I removed the sweater I was wearing, suddenly feeling warm. I didn't know why, being as it was rather cold outside.

I threw my sweater over the empty chair beside me, turning back quickly. When I did, I caught Jacob looking up at me with what almost looked like a frown.

"You're not going to make this easy are you?"

"What?"

"This sort of ruins my whole plan of keeping you warm during the movie."

When he took in my surprised expression, his lips twisted up into a sly grin. "I'm kidding, Liz. I'll keep my hands to myself. I promise."

I wanted to laugh, I was that relieved, but I figured that might give him the wrong impression.

"You're…you're rather sarcastic aren't you?"

He grinned. "Yes. Very much so."

I shook my head. He was quite the character. After a few more words, the lights lowered as the previews began to play.

As soon as the movie started, I was completely engrossed.

It was a documentary that took place to an old insane asylum in New York. A group of people, mostly young people, spent three days there. The movie revolved around those three days and all the 'paranormal' things that happened there.

Not even ten minutes in there were people screaming and a few even got up and left.

As the movie progressed, it was obvious that being locked in this old building was taking an effect on the people. They were seeing things, their emotions changing at the drop of the head. Someone said they were being possessed and I felt like laughing.

I knew what that was like. Though not spiritually possessed by some demon, I _was _under father's intense control. It was like we were his puppets, never allowed to do anything without his consent or else we paid the consequences.

It was that thought, not what I was seeing on the screen that struck fear in my veins. Even thinking about father and what he was capable of doing made me shiver, my hands slightly trembling for a second.

It just so happened that at that very moment, it was revealed that one of the 'guests' committed suicide in the same room where numerous patients had died over the decades.

People all around the theater screamed, including me. I heard Jacob laughing lightly in the dark before a hand came to rest on my knee.

"It's just a movie," He whispered "but don't worry, I'll keep you safe." I knew he was making fun of me, but he sure didn't move his hand away from me. After fighting myself for a few minutes, I just let him keep his hand there. What harm could come from that right?

After a few minutes, I nearly forgot about his hand as I got caught up in the movie again. Jacob doing the same thing. The closer it got to the end, I twirled a lock of hair around my finger as I anxiously awaited to see what would happen to all of these people.

It was a somewhat typical ending when, at the end of the third day, all of the visitors left the asylum. You could tell that they were all haunted though. You could see it in their eyes. The film ended with the group of people silently filed towards their cars, faces gaunt and eyes elsewhere.

It was eerie, but fascinating at the same time. It made you wonder what they didn't show and made you question not only their sanity, but yours as well.

I happened to question to my sanity every day because no sane person would sit around and endure all the things father did to us without ever saying anything.

I came to the conclusion that a part of me was probably crazy and that's why I enjoyed these kinds of movies so much.

The lights came back on, people erupting into a debate of if it was real or not. I thought it was, but Jake didn't look too convinced.

We walked out of the theater, him glancing at his cell phone quickly. I wondered if he was bored with me and wanted to get me back home as soon as possible. I wouldn't blame him. I wasn't the most exciting person to be around after all.

"So," he looked over at me "you want to get something to drink or something? It's still pretty early."

My assumptions were wrong and I was secretly thankful. "Sure," I agreed quickly "that's sounds good."

There was a coffee shop not too far from the theater so we just walked down the street to where it was. It must've been pretty popular because there were a lot of people in there, but I was still able to find a table in the back of the shop. He practically pushed me back there, but not before I quickly told him what I wanted.

I only waited for a good five minutes or so before he placed a cup of coffee in front of me. He sat across from me, but since the table wasn't that big he was still close enough to me.

I blew on it for a second before taking a sip of the hot liquid.

Jacob must've noticed my facial expression changed because he was laughing at me again. Oddly enough, I didn't feel stupid or like a child when he did though. No, it was like he was enjoying himself with me and that's what this was all about. I had to make a good impression on him, make him see that I wasn't the 'freak' that his friend had called me. That I was normal, no matter what the truth actually was.

"Good?" He watched with a curious expression.

"Yes," I nodded quickly "there's no need to make fun of me Jacob." My tone was teasing and he knew it. He picked up on it, decided to play along.

"I'm not making fun of you, Liz. I just enjoy watching you do things. You're so…animated. It's like you've never done these things before."

I set my cup down and shrugged. "Well, not very often."

The playfulness left his eyes. "Well, why not?"

Another shrug. "My father was rather strict growing up. We weren't allowed to do much." _We still aren't allowed to do much._

"That must've sucked. You should be having a good time."

"I'm having one now. Does that count?"

"Of course it does. You're a rather entertaining date I must say."

"Why?"

"Either that or I just really like you." He didn't answer me, but instead gave me a statement to ponder.

"Jacob, I hope that you don't think that this will lead to a real relationship?" I asked before I could even stop myself and I felt like a complete idiot when I did.

He frowned for a second, taking a long drink of whatever it was he had. "I don't."

I watched him warily, not sure if he was lying or not. "Can you promise me that?"

He leaned in closer, hands barely touching my own. "No."

I attempted to say something, but he cut me off.

"You may not believe me, but I like you Liz and a part of me is hoping that this will turn into more than what it is right now. I think that you and I could be really good together. You're sweet and beautiful and any guy would be lucky to have someone like you. I'm still not sure why you told your father that we're dating, but I agreed because you never know what'll come out of this."

I briefly processed his comments. They didn't feel right, especially when I thought about Jasper and how this would affect him if Jacob and I were to ever be together for real. It'd break him and I couldn't do that to him. Though, I'm sure what I was doing right now wasn't any better. He was already hurting and it was all my fault.

"That's really sweet of you Jake, but I can't make you any promises."

He remained silent for a second, but he surprised me by simply shrugging and smiling warmly at me. "Well, that isn't exactly a no now is it?"

I slumped in my chair. I was seeing that Jacob was relentless and was going to keep bringing this up for however long we kept up this charade.

That's when a thought hit me. Just how long would this last? Jacob and I couldn't do this forever. Would a few months suffice or would this have to be something long term? I was only a junior in high school and when I finally graduated, I hardly doubted that father would let any of us attend a university away from the city.

Father's threat snaked its way into my ears and I could feel my skin crawl, making me cringe slightly.

"What's got you so spooked?" I was pulled from thoughts, Jacob looking at me concerned.

I had to lie. "I was just thinking about the movie."

His laugh was short. "You were really into weren't you?"

"I was. Call me crazy, but I love movies like that. They really make you think what's out there and you know, if the presence of someone who's long gone can still lurk and haunt others."

"What's so crazy about that? I personally am waiting for the day I have a ghostly encounter. It'd probably scare the shit out of me, but I want to know what it's like. I want to know what it feels like to meet someone who died a long time ago."

That piqued my interest. I leaned in back towards him. "Me too, I want to go someplace haunted."

"Maybe that makes us both crazy?"

"I guess so." I admitted softly. It was one thing to consider myself emotionally unstable, but it was another to hear someone else say it, even if just joking.

The playful look in his eyes disappeared as soon as the words left his mouth and he was suddenly looking at me with a serious, somber expression.

"Those things Paul said today in the cafeteria? I didn't believe him for a second, Liz. He had no right to say those things to you."

"It's alright. I could see why people would say those things, but it was the first time I had ever heard something like that about me and my brothers. Which fine, they can say all they want about me, but I refuse to sit and let someone talk about my brothers in that manner." My guard was suddenly up, as always, at the mere mention of my brothers.

"You're all very protective of each other aren't you?"

I nodded. "All we have is each other." I realized what I said and quickly tried to add to it. "I mean, the three of us all lost parents when we were younger and that's something you don't ever fully recover from you know? Edward, Jasper and I are extremely close. I love them and would do anything to protect them."

He nodded, taking in the information. "Does that mean you all aren't related?"

"No. I was adopted by Esme and her husband when my mother died. Edward is her son and after a few years, her husband died too. She was in a deep depression for awhile, but about two years, she met Jasper's father…and the rest is history as they say." I wondered if that made any sense to Jacob. I had never really thought about it, but our family was complicated as hell. Besides all the things father did to us, there was an eerie parallel to the fact that _all _three of us had lost a parent. For all we knew, that had something to do with how we dealt with things now.

All I knew was that things were twisted and complicated at home every day, so it didn't really come as much as a surprise.

"That's crazy, but it's nice to see that you all are so close."

"Yes. So, it's not that we shut everyone else out because we're weird, but just three of us is all we've ever really known."

"Well your brothers are very lucky to have you as a sister."

"I'm nothing special, just doing what I can." I decided to change the subject. "What about you? Do you have brothers or sisters?"

He groaned. "Two sisters. They don't live here anymore though, they're off at school. I'd kill to have a brother."

It was my turn to frown. "They're a handful."

Our conversation flowed easily after that point, both Jacob and I learning a lot more about each other. Well, he mostly talked and I listened. Which, that's what I wanted it to be. There was only so much I could lie about to him before he got suspicious. I knew it wasn't fair, but there was no way I could tell him the entire truth about some things.

He rambled on about cars for a little bit, but when he saw I didn't really understand he changed the subject and started talking about other things.

Before I knew it, two hours had passed between us. It wasn't until they announced that the shop was closing did I realize the time. I don't believe I had ever talked to someone, other than my brothers, for that long and actually enjoyed myself.

"Shit, I didn't realize the time." He stood as they began closing up, offering me his hand. I took it hesitantly, and we walked out of the shop that way.

"Me either. You're very easy to talk to, Jacob." It was true. Talking to him was like talking to an old friend who I'd known all my life.

"I have that effect on people." He nudged my shoulder playfully as we walked, but he happened to push right into my bruised upper arm. I bit my lip for a second, waiting for the shooting pain to subside.

It was then that I realized I had too quickly forgotten about my reality, allowing myself a few hours of pretending to be a normal teenager.

I should be doing these things without hesitation, be out there having an actual life without fear of what would happen when I got back home.

"So humble and modest." I attempted to nudge him back, but he was way stronger and taller than I was so I doubt he even felt it.

"Nice try babe. I'll give you an A for effort though." His teasing continued, an elderly couple smiling at us as we walked by. Clearly, they enjoyed our little banter.

_If they only knew this wasn't real._

Our conversation continued as he drove me back home. The closer we got to the house, the more anxiety I felt. I knew the second I walked through those doors, all the good moments with Jacob would disappear and I'd have to face a bleak and cold world again.

Though our relationship wasn't real, I had the feeling that Jacob could perhaps be a good friend. If so, he'd actually be the first real friend I'd had in a very long time.

Suddenly, the thought of him being a friend sounded much more appealing than this whole fake relationship. Unfortunately, a relationship is what I needed from Jacob for mine and my brothers' sake.

He pulled up into the driveway and shut off his car. He was quickly on the other side, opening the door for me.

He helped me out and the two of us walked to the door.

Standing there, I felt completely clueless.

This was the end of our 'date' and he had walked me to my door. I knew what was supposed to come next, but I wasn't sure if he'd try it. I didn't exactly want him too, knowing that would somehow start to blur the lines. At the same time, however, I knew I had to put on a good show at all times.

"I honestly had a good time, Liz. I'm glad you picked that movie. I didn't peg you as a scary movie type of girl."

I gave him a half smile. "There's a lot you don't know about me."

He raised an eyebrow, taking two steps closer to me, towering over me. "Are you flirting with me? Because I do believe that sounded like a challenge."

"I just want you to see the real me, that's all." That wasn't completely true though and I felt horrible after the words left my mouth. I don't think Jacob would ever know the real me. Not now, not ever.

"Well then Miss Cullen," he leaned down, his hand coming to rest on my cheek "I look forward to getting to know the real you."

I had no idea what I was doing, but the closer I felt him getting I felt my eyes sliding closed just as his lips grazed over mine. He was gentle, not pressing or pushing too hard.

He kissed them again, moving up to my cheeks, my forehead and finally one last time against my lips.

As he pulled away, I felt him smile. "Sweet dreams, Liz." He whispered and I nodded lamely.

"Night, Jacob." I practically squeaked as he walked away. He heard me though, turning around to give me one more smile.

"Night babe." One last look and he was back in his car, backing up from the driveway.

I slid my key, opening the door slowly. The entire first floor was practically pitch black and I sighed in relief. That meant father and mother were still out and Edward and Jasper were upstairs.

I climbed up the stairs slowly, almost in a daze. I wasn't exactly sure, but something inside of me was practically begging me to crack a smile. My heart was still beating rapidly against my chest, making it seem like it was going t jump right out.

I didn't understand why though. This 'date' wasn't a real one, but it sure felt like it. I knew that Jacob liked me, but I don't think I could ever return those feelings back to him.

For a few moments throughout the evening, a part of me believed it but that disappeared quickly.

Every time I allowed myself to see Jake in that light, as an actual boyfriend instead of this twisted and awkward situation, all I could think about was someone else.

Not just anyone else, but Jasper. I kept telling myself that he was on my mind because Edward and he were the reason as to why I was doing this, to protect them.

I knew it was a lie though. I was lying to myself, trying to pretend that I was only thinking of my brothers' best interest when in reality I couldn't find the will to think of any other person besides Jasper doing things that I only craved from him.

Though I'm sure Jacob could never make me feel the things I felt when I was with Jasper.

Every thought and feeling I had about Jasper this evening were completely confirmed when, as I walked down the hall, his door opened and he stepped out into the darkened hallway.

Even without saying a word, I could already feel my stomach doing those annoying little flips. Just with one look and I was falling apart, longing for him to kiss me or something like that.

"I need to talk to you." his voice was hard, eyes boring into mine.

I swallowed nervously, nodding my head. I was tired, but I couldn't say no.

I crossed the hall, Jasper leaning against his door as I walked by him.

Sitting on his bed, I wanted nothing more to just lay down with him and sleep. I love those little moments when it was just the two of us. There was never any need for words, it just felt…right. Being with him, I felt safe.

I knew that wasn't a possibility, however, when I saw the look on his face as he shut the door and came over to me. I noticed that he was still wearing the same clothes from earlier and he was running his hand through his hair as he kneeled in front of me.

"Tell me," he took a deep breath "everything that happened with him Liz."

I shook my head. "Jasper, I don't think…"

"No," he cut me off "you need to tell me." There was a pained tone to his voice and I didn't understand.

It was clear that he didn't really want to know and yet, something inside of him wanted me to tell him. I couldn't possibly know what that was though.

Resting one hand the bed, the other was on my leg as he watched me.

I pushed some of his hair out of his face. "Fine, I'll tell you." I knew my trying to argue with him was pointless.

He stood quickly, sitting beside me on the bed and waited.

I had a feeling this wasn't going to be an easy conversation, if the look on his face was any indication.

It was now or never I suppose.

My only hope was that he wouldn't get too angry with me.

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**So what did you guys think of Jake? Their date? I know some of you are on the fence about him. **

**Jasper wanting to know about the date? You'll get his reasoning next chapter. **

**As always, I greatly appreciated your feedback.  
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	12. I'm Losing

**AN: I first want to apologize for not being able to respond to my reviewers from last chapter. Between finals and real life, I didn't have much time for anything else, but do know that I lvoed every single one of them! You all are the reason for me to continue with this story. **

**Second, thank you to my friend Lindsey. I don't know where I'd be without you babe! Especially when I was stuck with the end of this chapter!**

**As always, all I own is Liz & my plotline. I do wish Jasper belonged me to (even when he's moody and unpredictable). **

**Enjoy!**

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**Chapter 12: I'm Losing**

**One thought one misconception  
you hold my body close  
I think I'm losing my grip  
I think I'm losing control  
your fear is my obsession  
kind hearts inside are cold  
I think I'm losing my grip  
I think I'm losing control**

**Jasper**

Kneeling, staring up into my sister's eyes, I realized that I had made the biggest mistake in asking her to tell me what happened on her date.

Why the fuck would I want to know what she and that boy did? Though I'm sure it was nothing serious, I still didn't want to hear it.

_Then why the hell did you ask her?_

Because I had to. As much as I hated the thought of another guy's hands on her, I _needed _to know where and if he touched her.

Before I could change my mind about anything, she agreed quietly, brushing her hand across my cheek as she pushed some of my hair back.

One little touch and I was gone.

I stood quickly and sat beside her on the bed and waited. If she was going to tell me, then it'd only be fair that she tell me on her own time.

I didn't want to push her, but after a few minutes of nothing I was starting to grow impatient.

"Will you just tell me?" I was practically pleading with her and she knew it.

Liz and I had very little self control when it came to the other so after a moment, she started talking.

"Where do you want me to start?"

"Where did you two go?"

"We went to the movies and then after that we went to small coffee shop near the theater and just talked."

_Talked_.

Shit, that wasn't a good thing. "And what did you two talk about?"

She seemed confused. "We talked about a little bit of everything."

"Everything?" I realized I was repeating things like a stubborn child, but I refused to believe that she had told this boy, a boy she hardly knew, the inner workings out our home life.

She opened her mouth perhaps to ask me what the hell I was doing, but stopped short when she finally understood where I was going with all this.

"Oh," she frowned "I can't believe you would think that of me Jasper."

She was hurt. It was written all over her face.

"I don't think badly of you Liz. It's just I know how you get. You trust someone and you're liable to tell them things you shouldn't be."

She didn't like that statement one bit. Narrowing her eyes, she tried to get a read on me to decide if I was being serious or just being a complete jackass.

"You're acting like this is something I've done before. Tell me Jasper, besides you and Edward, who else do I have? What person in my life can I trust completely?"

She was right. The three of us didn't have any real, true friends. A couple acquaintances for Edward and the few girls I dated, but that was about it.

I avoided her accusations. "What did you tell him?"

"I told him nothing more than I would've said to anyone else. He asked about you and Edward, we talked about the movie we saw, but for the most part it was him talking about things that were of interest of him. I know I might be naïve in this area of life, but you do honestly think I'd be stupid enough to tell him about what really goes on at home? What good would that bring us Jasper? It wouldn't…it would only hurt us more and that's the last thing I want."

"I suppose you're right, Liz."

She turned to face me better, her hand coming to rest on top of mine. Her touch, like always, was warm and clouded my ever shaky judgment.

The way she affected me was borderline ridiculous sometimes and I'm sure there was no logical explanation as to why that was.

The only reason I could ever come up was the fact that Liz was, hands down, the most important woman in my life. Of course I loved my mother, but Liz was in a whole category of her own.

The constant alternating between the desire to protect and the desire to posses her was enough to cause a fucking headache sometimes. It was getting to the point that I didn't really know which was more potent these days. It seemed that the rougher things got for us at home, the more I needed her to belong to me.

"Jasper," she squeezed my hand "what's this really about?"

I had to hand it to my sister. She had to be the only person who could call me out on my bullshit no matter how hard I tried to not show it.

My emotions were always an open display for her and there was never any point to try and deny things.

She would always figure it out.

She was right. She _wasn't _stupid.

"I need to know something. Will you tell me the truth?"

"Have I ever lied to you?"

"No, so please don't start doing it now."

She had no respond to my snide comment.

"Did he kiss you?"

Four words and she instantly pulled her hand away from me, as if it had burned her to be touching me. As if she was in disbelief.

"Jasper," she was practically pleading with me. Why would she be doing that? Unless…unless something had happened with that boy and was terrified of what I would say, or even do.

All I knew was that if he so much as did something to displace one hair on her head I would make sure that never happened again; make sure he paid.

"Tell me." Anger was already rising in my veins, already expecting the worst.

"He did, he kissed me when he dropped me off."

Fuck, I knew it. I knew the second he had her to himself he would try something.

"Why the hell would you allow him to do that?" I raised my voice a fraction, anger and jealously overtaking every other emotion I was capable of producing. "Fake relationship or not, you shouldn't have let him kiss you."

"I didn't have a choice, Jasper. Do you think I wanted it?"

"Did you tell him no?"

She shook her head. "What does it matter anyways? Why are you doing this?"

"Just because I need to fucking know alright?"

"Oh is that so?" She stood, staring at me like I had completely lost my mind. "And tell me, did you hear the answer you were expecting? Why the hell are you putting the both of us through this?"

"What kind of question is that?" I stood, mirroring her stance, only a few inches separating the two of us. "You _know _why."

The realization struck her quickly, her eyes softening. "It wasn't like that Jasper. It'll never be like that. I wouldn't dare dream of doing things I only desire to share with you."

A weight seemed to lift of my shoulders while at the same time I felt like a complete insensitive asshole who had hurt my sister yet again.

It always escaped me, always got pushed to the back of my mind that Liz was doing this for all of us. She wasn't doing it for the sake of becoming romantically involved with another boy.

No, she was doing it because we were leading these twisted and broken lives.

She was just trying to help better this situation and yet, I was standing here attacking her for something that wasn't exactly her fault.

Though I knew my reaction was uncalled for I couldn't find the will to apologize to her. In a rather selfish move, I knew I had every right to be angry with this situation we were now in.

So instead I offered her a silent form of apology, stepping closer and hesitantly wrapping my arms around her. She didn't respond immediately, her eyes scanning my face as she waited for me to say something.

I didn't know what to tell her. If I told I was sorry or that she was right, she would instantly believe that I was okay with this situation between her and this boy. Which, that couldn't be further from the truth. I was _never _going to be okay with this, however long this lie lasted.

So, I did the only thing I knew would placate with her.

With my eyes still locked with hers, I gave her a curt nod and just like I knew she would, she pressed her tiny frame against mine as she hugged me back.

We stood there for only a few minutes before she pulled away.

"Come sleep." I pushed some of her hair back. "You look exhausted."

"That sounds wonderful," she bit her lip "but I can't. At least not right now."

"And why not?"

"I need to take a shower." She whispered. I subconsciously inhaled deeply, the only thing I smelt was her and the scent she always carried.

The second time I did it however, I knew why she needed to take one.

Though it wasn't very strong, there was a faint trace of cologne coming off of her clothes. A scent that didn't belong to anyone in this household.

Shit, just how close did this asshole get to my sister? Did he not know the concept of personal space?

I reluctantly released her and she backed away from me slowly, her eyes seemingly not wanting to break our connection.

When she reached the door, however, she didn't have a choice. She slowly turned, walking out into the darkened hallway, her own bedroom door opening a minute later.

As I waited for her, I sat on my bed and debated with myself.

When she was done, would she even come back in here or would I have to go to her?

If the latter was the only option, would I do it? Would I have the means to just suck it up and go to her, the girl I'd do anything for?

_Yes, yes you would so don't even try and deny it. _

As much as my inner conscious was right, my ego didn't seem to agree. Why should I go to her when she was slowly breaking everything between us?

Oh she didn't see it now, but I could. To her, it was just a simple date, but it was so much more than that.

Fake or not, this was the beginning of something that would not end well for any of us.

Whether this ended by the truth of their relationship being exposed, or if Liz actually started to grow fond of this Jacob character and decided that she truly wanted to be with him.

I honestly didn't know which one was worse. At any rate, it was like I was losing her.

_You shouldn't think this way, Jasper. It was only a first date, do not jump to conclusions about things. _

Fuck that, of course I was. I had to think about this from all angles, on the off chance that something like that happened. I wanted to be prepared, instead of wallowing in pity.

I, apparently too consumed with my inner battles, did not hear when my bedroom door opened up back again. It wasn't until I felt the mattress dip did I even notice there was someone there.

On my back, I was looking up at the ceiling when I felt her.

Shyly, her hand came to rest on my cheek as she brushed some of my hair out of my eyes. She smiled, but it was laced with nerves and guilt.

I sat up further, my hand coming to rest behind her neck. I wanted nothing but to kiss her, another silent assurance that I was not angry with her, but I couldn't bring myself to do it.

Knowing that _he _kissed her, just thinking about fueled an anger so deep from within me that I wasn't sure if I'd always be able to control.

Instead I opted for a chaste kiss to her forehead before allowing her to lie down beside me. Even with minimal light in the room, I was still able to make out her nightly attire.

God, even dressed in a pair of shorts and an old t-shirt, there was no god given way that any man could resist her.

Liz had an allure about her that many men desired.

She was beautiful and innocent, two qualities that rarely seemed to go hand and hand these days. She had never been one to flaunt her features, calling attention to boys in school and yet, she had somehow managed to convince someone to pretend to date her without so much as begging him to do so.

I suppose, to a certain extent, I couldn't exactly blame this Jacob character. If perhaps I was in his position and the opportunity arose to 'date' a beautiful, intelligent girl like Liz, I believe I would have agreed as well.

But none of that mattered right now.

It didn't exactly matter anymore that she had gone on this date. Sure, it was still lurking in the depths of my mind, but at least at this very moment I had her with me. And I wasn't about to let her go anywhere for the rest of the evening.

I wanted her, needed her touch to calm me.

As much as I was pissed off at everything, at the situation Liz had created for herself, I couldn't stomach not being in this very position right now.

"I'm sorry Jasper." She whispered, her head resting on my chest while her hand grabbed mine and laced them together.

I didn't respond and I think she knew I wouldn't. I knew she didn't need to be apologizing, but a part of me was glad that she did. Selfish as it sounded, I was glad that she was upset that she knew she had upset me.

We drifted off to sleep quickly, her steady breathing becoming the sound I was coming to love with each passing second. The way her body molded perfectly against mine gave me a bit of personal satisfaction.

She was all I needed. Right here, right now.

And that was it.

*******

Our weekend past rather slowly, filled with homework and going to church on Sunday. It was routine, but at least no one got hurt this weekend. Twice father looked like he was going to strike Liz, but he changed his mind at the last minute again. First was when he caught her and Edward laughing about something 'childish' in the kitchen and the second was when I made the mistake of speaking for Liz when she was incapable of answering a question fast enough.

To this day, I cannot figure out why father is so much harder on Liz. Why he punishes her much more than Edward and I. Yes, he may hit us a bit rougher sometimes, but she gets it more often. Who knows which one is the shorter end of the stick?

Liz and I worked our lab assignment on Sunday, Edward in the room with us so she could help him with their Spanish homework.

As cruel as it sounded, I wanted nothing more than for Edward to the leave the room. It wasn't that I had anything against my brother, but he was just being a bit of a distraction.

I hadn't spent much time with Liz and my patience was starting to wear thin. While I'm sure she didn't plan it on purpose, it seemed almost too convenient that other than Friday night, Liz and I hadn't been alone.

I wasn't exactly convinced that she was avoiding being alone with me deliberately, but I could understand why. I hadn't exactly treated her properly on Friday night, so it wouldn't come as any surprise if she was afraid of that happening again.

The lingering actions and unspoken apologies hung thick in the air, a barrier between the two of us. We both knew that if something wasn't said soon, this would tear us apart.

It would break what little progress the two of us had made over the past month or so.

That wasn't something I could allow to happen, no matter how much it fucking killed me.

Before I knew it, it was Monday. Another weekend that was sure to be filled with more Jacob and Liz talks and phone calls. I'd bet that there would be another date thrown in by the end of the week.

I had to hand it to him. Jacob Black was not as stupid as I thought he was. No, that fucker was taking every advantage to spend time with Liz.

Like this very moment, in the cafeteria where plenty of people could see them, they were perfecting their 'relationship' appearance.

I didn't want to look at them so I made sure my seat was facing away from them, but I might as well been looking at them.

Edward kept his eyes on them almost the entire time and every lift of his brow, or purse of his lips told me that something was going on that he wasn't fond of. And if he wasn't happy or was confused than I could only imagine what I would be thinking if I was actually looking.

"You should stop staring." I picked at the slice of pizza in front of me. This shit wasn't even enjoyable and it was a waste of money in my opinion. Yet, I knew we had to make do with what the school offered us and that was that.

"I'm trying," Edward lowered his head, looking at me from across the table "it's just…they're like a car accident, Jazz."

I was curious as to why my brother chose that particular metaphor. It was like what those two were doing, it was odd and not believable. I knew Liz had little knowledge, but I was almost positive that _he _knew a thing or two about dating and the act of flirtation. So, how bad could it possibly be?

Curiosity ultimately got the best of me and I had to see for myself what was so fascinating.

Perhaps I shouldn't have turned around though. Maybe I should've just ignored them completely.

When I did, I caught the two of them in a seemingly intimate setting. They were sitting with his friends, but they weren't paying any attention to them. He had has arm draped over her chair and was leaned in towards Liz, who had her head lowered as he said something in her ear.

She bit her lip, a move that was meant to drive all men mad, before placing her hand on his arm.

And then she laughed.

He fucking made her laugh.

"Jazz, turn back around or they'll see you." I barely heard Edward trying to call me back.

Knowing there were only a few minutes left before it was time for our final class I began to stand up, fully prepared to walk over and take her away from him.

I didn't get that far.

As the bell sounded, everyone stood up minus them. They were still in their conversation, Liz still smiling and Jacob laughing about something. What the fuck was so funny?

Before I could even register it he closed the minute distance between the two of them and kissed her cheek gently, his hand tilting her chin up towards him.

Such a simple gesture, but it was enough to get that anger boiling.

They stood, his arm wrapped around her shoulders tightly as they exited the cafeteria. She wasn't smiling anymore, but she seemed to be at ease with Jacob. She seemed to be comfortable with his touch.

Which, what the fuck? They were still barely getting to one another. What made him so special? Was it possible that this guy was so charismatic that he had my sister wrapped around his finger already?

As they walked by, however, I realized that it was more likely the other way around.

He may be stronger than her, more experienced, but it was clear that he was the one who was clinging on to whatever she said and did and she didn't even know it.

I glanced over at Edward who held a sympathetic look on his face. He didn't say anything, there was no need to. He had seen that little stunt just now too. Instead, he rose and patted my shoulder gently before making his way to his class.

I was dangerously close to just not going to Biology, but I knew word would quickly get to father and there would be hell to pay once he got home. Father did not condone failure or delinquent behavior as he called it. We were to be in school and get good grades. There was no other option for us.

It _had _to be done.

Just because I convinced myself to go to class, it didn't mean I had to act civil with anyone.

I barely acknowledged my sister when I walked in, taking my seat beside her silently.

She didn't even attempt to make conversation. She knew I was upset, and she wasn't going to do anything to make it worse.

Liz was so selfless sometimes that it was borderline irritating. No human being should care so much about other people that they would be able to give up their own happiness and sanity for the sake of someone who didn't deserve it.

I did not deserve her kindness. She didn't need to be doing this for Edward and me. Yes, things seemed to be getting a bit better at home, but was it really worth it?

The glint in Liz's eyes told me that she believed it was and as much as I wanted to tell her she was wrong, I knew I wouldn't.

For as much I hated it, I knew I couldn't deny her either.

The class passed with relatively no talking, the action repeated once school was over and we left the campus.

She sat in the back as usual and glared out the window, her eyes focused on anything but Edward and I. She knew I had been watching her, but she wasn't saying about it. Why would she? It wouldn't bring any good. It would only cause greater tension between us.

We all separated once we got home, Edward and I going upstairs while Liz went straight towards the kitchen. She normally didn't do that, but it was obvious she didn't want to be near me.

I tried to ignore that, brush it off as something other than what it really was, but I just couldn't.

Sitting in my room for only a good fifteen minutes or so, I couldn't take it anymore.

The anger has reached its boiling point and I could no longer hold it in.

I didn't know what my intentions were were when I sat up and got off the bed, but I was certain of one thing.

This wasn't right and it sure as hell wasn't fair.

How was it that he was able to kiss her, make her laugh while I couldn't so much as glance at her for too long?

_She isn't yours Jasper. Remember that._

Fuck that. I wasn't about to sit around and just watch this all unfold before my eyes.

Liz needed to know and she needed to know now.

I made my way downstairs, taking them two at time until I found myself standing in the kitchen.

She hadn't heard me come in, so her back was still to me as she stared out the window in front of her.

She was barefoot, her foot lightly tapping against the tile floor and humming some song.

Even though she looked peaceful, I knew better. It was the way she was standing that told me she was stressed about something, and I could only imagine what that was.

I knew it, but it still didn't stop me.

I crossed the kitchen quickly and quietly, my arms wrapping around her waist.

She gasped and tensed when I grabbed her, but seemed to relax when she sense it was me.

Before she could even blink, I moved and twisted her so that she was now facing me.

Looking up at me, her eyes scanned over my face as she tried to figure out what I was doing.

I moved my hands up from her sides, placing them firmly on her face.

"You may belong to him at school, but here at home you're mine." I practically hissed, anger and lust thick in my voice.

She opened her mouth to protest, but I pinned her against the counter before she could.

Bringing her face up closer I kissed her, pouring every ounce of anger, jealousy and desire into it. She sighed, her arms winding around my neck in attempts to pull me closer.

Hands tangled in her hair as I wasted no time in running my tongue over her bottom lip roughly, but she still let me in. Tasting her, it was like my drug and nothing else seemed to matter the second I did.

All control started to fade away into nothingness the more I kissed her, the more her hands made their up into my hair and tugged it gently.

When she eventually pulled away, the need for air greater than her need for me, my lips skimmed down lower until I was lightly nipping at the skin near her collarbone.

I was careful, knowing that if there was even the slightest mark on her, it would ruin everything I was trying achieve.

Liz wouldn't be mine if we were constantly hiding out around our home instead of taking what little time we had and using it to our advantage.

She tilted her head, her heart pulsing faster under my lips.

That's when I lost it.

Wrapping an arm tightly around her waist, I lifted her effortlessly so that she was balanced on the edge of the counter.

I knew that this wasn't smart. Doing something like this so out in the open, but I was dying for her attention. I wanted her with me and I was going to take every opportunity I had.

I ran my hands up her jean clad thighs and up under her shirt, softly caressing the skin there.

Suddenly, as if she was jolted awake, she dropped her hands and pushed mine away from her.

With a fucking defeated feeling in my chest, I looked up to meet her gaze.

"Jasper, what are you doing?" She was breathless, resting her hands in her lap. "This is crazy and dangerous. We could be so easily caught! What would we say then?"

I had no answer for her, because I hadn't been thinking about any of that, just the feel of her next to me. I was so tired of seeing her with Jacob, knowing that he could do everything that I wanted to out in the open.

I just needed to know that she still wanted me.

Knowing she wouldn't pick up on any subtle hints, I decided to ask her point blank.

"Do you still want me Liz?"

She gasped lightly, raising one of her hands and placing it on my cheek. "What did you just say?"

I gave her a knowing look, but her eyes were watching me with a mixture of confusion and guilt.

"Tell me you still want me. Just please…fucking tell me you do."

She shook her head. "Jasper, how can you even ask me something like that? I haven't done anything to make you question my feelings for you."

She stated it with such confidence that I nearly believed her, but I knew deep down that was a lie. Oh how quickly did she forget about all that had transpired between her and Jacob.

"You _kissed _him."

Her eyes flickered with sadness, but she kept her hand in place. "He kissed me, Jasper. I couldn't do anything about it. It didn't mean anything and you know it."

"How do I know it didn't meant anything? Did you stop him?"

She looked away from me. "You know I couldn't."

"And why's that?" I pressed, stepping in closer to her, her legs on either side of my waist.

"I have to make it seem real. Otherwise this will never work. I thought we talked about this?"

"And me? Does it matter what I want or how I feel?"

"Of course it does!" She raised her voice slightly. "All I want is for you two to be safe, that's all. That kiss was nothing…I promise."

I snickered. "Prove it."

She tilted her head. "Prove what?"

"If that kiss meant nothing, then prove it to me. Prove that you want me more."

"But I…I don't want him."

"Prove it." I repeated.

I knew I was being as asshole and she didn't deserve this, but I kept pushing her.

I needed to know, the desire to know she wanted me always burning thick in my veins.

She slowly moved her hand, wrapping it around my neck and pulled me down towards her. I complied and her lips bypassed my own and went to my throat.

She kissed me softly, her warm breath fanning across me as I moved to hold her tighter against me.

Moving up, she left a trail of kisses along my jaw and cheek before she reached my ear.

"You're the only one I want." She was saying the words I desperately wanted to hear, but there was a sense of sadness and fear in her words. "How can I prove it to you? Please…just tell me." Her head was turned, her cheek resting mine but I could hear the quiet sob that passed her lips.

And then, just as quickly as the desire to show me she wanted only me, the realization of what I was doing to her hit me like a freight train.

I pulled away from her quickly, my hands on either side of her face. A few of her tears fell onto my hand and I brushed some of them away.

"Fuck, I'm sorry Liz. I…I shouldn't be acting this way."

She shook her head, her hands moving to rest on the front of my shirt. "Just tell me, Jasper. I'll do whatever it takes to prove it to you." She was acting strong, but I could see the fear in her eyes.

She wasn't ready for this and here I was trying to force her into something she obviously didn't want to do.

"No," I brushed her hands off of me gently "just…don't listen to a word I said. I'm so fucked in the head right now. I just…I need to control it better."

"Control what?"

"The anger and jealousy, I'm sorry. Damn it." I groaned, my shoulders slumping and my head lowering a bit.

"Hey," she placed her hand on my face gently "don't talk like that. You have every right to be angry with me and I understand if you are. Just…we have to talk about it Jasper. We can't just pretend like nothing's wrong when it's clear something is."

"How the hell are we going to get through this? I'm not making things any easier on you."

She shrugged. "We just have to take it one day at a time okay?"

I nodded, even though I didn't agree fully with her, but as always I gave into whatever it was my sister was asking of me.

I leaned into her touch, the warmth of her hand soothing any anger and hatred I may have had coursing through my body. She reached up and wrapped her other arms around me, holding my tightly against her. I caved, burying my face in the crook of her neck and inhaling deeply.

"We're fucked aren't we?" The realization hit me quickly.

She nodded slowly. "Yes, yes we are."

We stood there for a long while, the two of us refusing to separate from the other. I needed her, but she needed me just as much.

No matter how twisted things would become, it would always come down to this.

It would always come down to Liz and I.

We, after all, were each other's escape.

And nothing would ever change that, no matter how hard it'll be.

* * *

**Well, I suppose it's safe to say that Jasper is one step away from losing it completely. The poor guy, this isn't easy at all on any of them.**

**Your reviews keep me going when I need it the most!  
**


	13. In Your World

**AN: As always, a major thank you to all my reviewers. You all keep me going! I honestly don't know what's going on with my characters this chapter, but it's my hope that you like it. They take on a mind of their own sometimes. **

**To my girls, thank you so much.**

**All I own is Liz & my plot.**

**

* * *

****Chapter 13: In Your World**

**Too broken to belong  
too weak to sing along  
I'll comfort you my friend  
Helping you to  
Blow it all away**

**In your world  
No one is crying alone  
In your world  
No one is dying alone**

**Liz**

Three weeks had passed since that little incident with Jasper in the kitchen. I would love to say that things have gotten better, but they really haven't. The only thing I can say that has improved is the fact that father is no longer hitting us in visible places. The beatings haven't lessened, but at least they're a bit unnoticeable now.

Instead of slaps across the face, I was being pinched more often, almost daily. Jasper and Edward were suffering less as well. It had been almost two weeks since either of them had a visible mark on their bodies. Which, that was a very good thing in my book.

When it came to Jasper, however, he was a completely different story.

Though we had agreed to work on this one day at a time, things haven't made that very easy. After that day Jacob asked me to sit with him and his friends, it had turned into a daily thing. Every day now I was spending time with him instead of my brothers. It was awkward, but I was getting used to it somehow. His friends, though not exactly cordial, were no longer treating me like I was a bad person. They didn't ask me much, mostly just talking to Jacob, but they didn't exactly ignore me either. So I suppose that was a good thing. I had to do all I could to make this all seem real.

It suddenly felt like I was living a double life. During school, I was with Jacob during lunch and sometimes talked to him in the hallways. At home, however, I was Jasper's and he didn't let me forget it. Every day when we got home, he made sure to spend as much time as possible with me.

I knew he was jealous and it killed me that he was going through that. He tried to hide it, but I could see it written all over his face. He was always trying to keep things from me, but he should know by now that I can read him better than anyone else.

Though he never said anything about it, it was like a constant competition between the two boys. I don't know why Jasper would even be thinking that. I was almost always telling him that Jacob was merely a friend who was doing us all a huge favor and that he was…well that he was my Jasper. No one was ever going to take his place or make me feel the way he did.

I wasn't really sure he bought it though. I could tell him countless times, but it didn't mean he was going to believe me. All in all, I was just trying to keep the stress and complications down to a minimum.

It wasn't easy in the slightest. I knew I was in over my head, but I refused to admit that out loud. Taking a page from my father's book of ethics I knew I couldn't do this half way. I was already fully invested so now I needed to make it work.

********

It was Friday, the end of yet another long week. I swear between homework, my fake relationship and everything at home I was both physically and mentally exhausted.

Even though my brothers knew the toll this was taking on me, they were on my case as soon as walked through the door. I tried to ignore them, wanting nothing than to take a nap for an hour or so before having to start on dinner. They had other ideas apparently.

"Liz," Jasper grabbed my arm gently "you need to eat something, now."

That was definitely a statement that came out of the blue. Sometimes I could never tell what my brothers were thinking. They could be very difficult to read when the wanted to. I didn't even want to know what brought on this. I could only imagine.

I shook my head at him. "I'm not hungry, I'm just really tired. Can we take a nap for a little bit?" I tugged on his arm towards the stairs. I could see the stern glare soften just a bit as he turned to look at Edward, as if to ask him what to do.

"Jazz, she needs to eat. Don't let her pull the eyes on you."

I opened my mouth to say something, but he gave me a knowing look and I didn't say anything. I knew that both Jasper and I had this effect on each other and we were constantly using it try and persuade the other of something.

I had almost won this round, but didn't have the strength to try much hard.

"Oh fine." I muttered, shaking loose from Jasper's grasp and walking towards the kitchen with them right behind me.

"Sit." Jasper was suddenly back in strict mode as he went and grabbed something for me to eat. I sat at the table across from Edward and watched them both. They were up to something. They didn't normally team up against me unless they were worried about something. Which, they had nothing to be worried about. I was just tired, nothing more.

He slid a plate in front of me that had a huge sandwich on it. Handing me a bottle of water, he sat beside me and the two of them just stared at me.

"Are you two going to watch me eat?"

"We need to know you're eating Liz." Edward answered me, looking at me with concerned eyes. "We don't see you during lunch anymore."

Oh, not this again. "You guys I'm fine, really."

"No, no you're not. You haven't been eating again Liz and don't try and lie. It's pretty evident with how skinny you've become over the past month."

I tried to brush it off. "I eat."

"Not enough, now…just eat this." He pushed the plate towards me and I hesitantly picked at it. I honestly wasn't hungry. I never ate at this hour and there was no use in starting now.

But I knew that wouldn't happen. My brothers, when they were both trying to convince me of something, didn't let up until I ultimately gave in.

It took me twenty minutes, but I eventually ate the whole dame thing. Before I even took the last bite, I was already feeling nauseous and my hands were starting to tremble slightly.

"What's wrong?" Edward was up as soon as the words left Jasper's mouth, the two of them hovering over me with worried looks in their eyes. I shook my head, knowing that if I said one word the result wouldn't be good.

"Liz," Jasper placed his hand on my back and rubbed it gently. Normally his touch would calm me, but this time it only made me dizzier.

I jerked away from his touch, but that was a bad idea. The sudden moment threw my entire body for a loop and I was up out of the chair in a second and ran towards the downstairs bathroom, flinging the door opening and emptying the contents of my stomach. It hurt, was disgusting and I didn't understand why I had just reacted in such a manner.

It was childish and foolish really. I should be able to keep down a simple sandwich. Just because I didn't normally didn't eat at this hour, it didn't mean it would kill me to do so. It wasn't anything big and yet my body was treating me like I had just ingested poison and needed to get rid of it as soon as possible.

My brothers were right behind me, Edward leaning against the counter while Jasper was down on the ground with me.

"Liz," he hedged with hesitation and anger in his voice. I knew what he was implying and I vehemently shook my head as I tried to stand up. My legs were shaking, but I somehow did it without falling back down.

"I'm not that kind of girl Jasper." I washed my hands, grabbing a bottle of mouthwash from under the sink and rinsing my mouth out. It would have to do until I got back upstairs so I could properly brush my teeth. "You know I'm not."

He didn't seem convinced. "Edward, can I speak to her alone please?"

Edward looked at us warily, perhaps wondering why he was being excluded from this conversation all the sudden.

"I'm just as much concerned as you are Jasper. I think I should stay."

I felt proud of Edward. He hardly ever stood up for himself, always afraid of what will happen if he were to do so.

Surprisingly, Jasper gave in and allowed him to stay, walking over to the door and closing it slowly.

"Take it off." He nodded towards me.

I titled my head, biting my lip. "Take what off?"

"Take the shirt off." He seemed somewhat irritated with me.

It wasn't a request, it was a demand. "Why?"

"If you have nothing to hide, you'll remove it." He seemed convinced with his theory, but I wasn't pleased in the slightest.

"Oh, I honestly can't believe you two." Grabbing the bottom of my shirt, I pulled it slowly over my head and tossed it on the counter. I stood there, hands on my hips, and watched them. Edward's eyes flickered towards me briefly before looking elsewhere, but Jasper took what seemed like forever to take in everything.

Even though I was angry with them for doing this, I could feel the blood creeping up towards my cheeks with each passing second that he watched me. There was something undeniable in his eyes, something that made me feel things whenever he looked at me. Regardless of the fact that he was checking for some signs of an eating disorder, I could see the want in his eyes.

"You think I would lie to you about something like this?"

"I know how you get Liz." Jasper said it like it was nothing, as if accusing me of making myself sick wasn't hurtful.

I shook my head incredulously, walking closer to him and grabbing his hands. I don't know what I was thinking or doing, but before I knew it I had his hands on my side on stomach. Maybe I thought that by him touching me, he would see that I wasn't all skin and bones.

"I'm not making myself sick damn it." I threw my head back, exhausted even more because of all this. "Why can't you two believe me?"

"I believe you." Edward looked at me, a small smile on his face. "We're just worried about you. It's not fair for you to have to be concerned about your weight. You're already too skinny and you don't need to lose anymore. Those ideas father's put into your head...they're not true and you know it."

"That's easy for you to say. It's easy because you don't have father constantly telling you things when no one else is around. He's being telling me these things for years. I can't just…ignore them. You know what'll happen if I do." The latter part was whispered, none of us wanting to think about the last time father 'caught' me gaining weight. It didn't even make sense, but he somehow knew.

Days of not eating, having your stomach burn and fainting from lack of nutrients was something that I _never _wanted to endure again and they both knew that. They knew, but they were still making a big deal out of it.

"Can you promise that you will never do something...resort to making yourself sick?" Jasper's voice was small and I returned my gaze back to meet his. His hands were still planted firmly on my bare skin, barely moving as he watched me. "Please promise us that Liz. I don't think either of us could handle you being sick. We…we need you."

I glanced between my two brothers and saw the same look of affliction on their faces. While they were concerned over my eating habits, they were also worried about how this would affect all of us.

As we always said, what affects one affects all of us.

I fought back my emotions. "Don't worry boys I'm not going anywhere. Yes, it's hard for me sometimes to be this perfect daughter father expects, but I would never resort to making myself sick. I don't really know what happened just now. I think maybe I just need to catch up on sleep."

I leaned out of Jasper's grasp, grabbing my shirt and pulling it back over my head. Adjusting it, they were still standing there watching me.

"What now?" I frowned, looking at them.

"Go…go take a nap. We'll wake you up before they get home." Edward came over and wrapped an arm around my shoulders, kissing the top of my head. "Go."

I opened my mouth to protest, but they both shook their heads. Meaning, I had no say in this matter anymore. Quite frankly, I was glad to comply with this demand. I was almost to the point where I could no longer keep my eyes open.

"Promise to wake me up in an hour?" I was already yawning as I exited the bathroom.

"We'll wake you up, don't worry Liz. You're running on no energy…you need it." I took Jasper's comment, figuring that he wouldn't be joining me in this nap. Which I suppose that was a good thing. Though I slept far better when he was with me, I was also liable to not get any sleep at all if he was with me. I never knew what to expect with that boy. He certainly kept me on my toes and I loved that. There was also a rush of excitement when I was with Jasper, a rush that I didn't have with Jake. Just another reason for Jasper to not get all worked up about things.

Both brothers stayed downstairs while I made my way to my room. I knew that they would probably spend that next hour talking about me, trying to convince themselves that I had been telling them the truth. I knew they'd eventually believe me because there was no reason for me to ever lie to them.

After a quick trip to the bathroom, I kicked my shoes and jeans off before crawling into my bed. I normally didn't sleep this way, but today seemed like one of those days. I pulled the thick blanket up around me as was out as soon as my head hit the pillow while the only thing in my mind was what it felt like when Jasper had touched me and how desperately I wanted him to do other things.

The hour passed far too quickly and before I knew it, I felt someone gently shaking my shoulder. I groaned and rolled over, burying my face into my pillow, not wanting to leave the warmth of my bed.

"You have to wake up now Liz." I heard Jasper calling me, a hint of guilt in his voice. I knew he didn't want to wake me up, but knew he had to. Mother and father would be returning home and I needed to start making dinner.

"Can I get five more minutes?"

"I don't think five minutes will help you. Come on," I felt him leaning over me and shaking my shoulder again. I rolled back over quickly and took his hand in mine.

"Five minutes?" I peered up at him through my eyelashes and pulled him closer, his knee now resting on the mattress as well. When he didn't move, I pulled the blanket back a little bit. "Please?"

I tugged on his hand again and this time, with a groan that told me he was giving him, he crawled fully onto the bed and got under the blanket with me. I instantly curled myself towards him and inhaled deeply, letting his scent invade my senses. When he felt my bare leg brushing against his own, he looked down quickly before giving me a questioning look.

"Why do you do this to me?" There was a playful undertone to his voice as he pulled me in tighter, his hand resting on my lower back.

"What?"

"You can't just pull me into your bed while you're barely dressed and expect me to not do anything. You clearly overestimate my self control Liz."

I shrugged, grabbed his hand and kissed his fingers. "Maybe I want you to lose control."

I hadn't realized those words had come out of my mouth until I felt him halt his movements on my back.

"You shouldn't say those things either." He looked down at me. "You don't know how hard it is Liz."

"It doesn't have to be like that." I had no idea where this sudden surge of confidence came from, but I was soon sliding my leg over his waist until I was fully up with each of my legs on either side of him. In doing so the blanket fell off my shoulders and piled somewhere behind.

Though I'm sure my hair was a tattered mess, it didn't matter the moment my hesitant gaze met his intense one. He started slowly, his hands coming up to run up my thighs. His hands were warm, sending little shocks throughout my body.

He eventually moved higher, softly touching my sides as he gathered the hem of my shirt in his hands and pulled it up. I took over when he couldn't lift anymore, pulling it completely off for the second time this afternoon. I stared down at him and wondered what exactly was going on.

He took me in, his hands coming to rest on my back again.

"I'm sorry." he murmured softly, sitting up. Before I could ask him why, he was pressing his lips lightly against my stomach, his trail of kisses only igniting that fire inside of me even further. Between his kisses and the movements on my back, we were both slowly losing control.

It was quickly becoming clear that I wanted nothing more than to give myself completely to him. Each touch stirred something deep inside of me and I found myself wanting more. As always, I had no idea how to go about this, but for the briefest of moments I allowed emotions and hormones take control.

Still kissing my stomach, I reached up and wound my hands into his hair. I felt him breathe heavily against my skin, seemingly pleased by my actions. Taking a deep breath, I shifted my hips against his and pushed him back. Jasper was much stronger than I was, but he thankfully lay back willingly.

With my entire body practically on top of his, I hovered down closer to him so that our lips were only inches apart.

"You're playing with fire." He gripped my hips, steadying them firmly against his own.

"Good." One word was all I could muster before leaning down and crashing my lips to his. I wanted Jasper, needed his taste to mix with mine. It was like when he kissed me, nothing else mattered. Nothing else existed outside my bedroom door. I loved forgetting, even if for a minute, that our lives were complete hell.

I kissed him with fervor, wanting him to feel every single emotion flow between us. I knew he was scared of hurting me or causing some sort of confusion, but I didn't care one bit.

He must've finally gotten the point I was trying to make, one hand leaving my hip and creeping up my back until it landed on the clasp of my bra.

"Please," I breathed heavily, wanting nothing more for this to happen right here and now.

However, instead of feeling him continuing I felt him backtracking. His hands dropped and I reluctantly pulled away from him. We were both breathing heavily, chests rising faster than normal.

"We can't do this Liz."

"Why?" I sounded completely defeated. All this time, he went on about me not wanting him, but had the tables turned? Did he perhaps not want me in that way anymore?

He sensed my confusion and reached up to brush some hair out of my face. "I _do _want you Liz. More than you could fucking imagine." Well, I didn't know about that. Every nerve strand in my body was on fire, the desire to be with him burning through me.

"Then…then why can't we?"

He smiled, his lips twisting into that smile that killed me every time. "It's not the right time."

What the hell? "Well when _will _it be the right time?" I felt myself pouting and I'm sure that looked real attractive, but I think I deserved an answer. I mean, this wasn't something that would be planned right? It would just happen?

"And I thought I was impatient." He shook his head. "With everything going on, I don't think it would be very smart of us Liz, you know that. Besides, we'll know when it's time."

That didn't tell me much. "How will me know?"

"Oh," he lowered his hands and trailed them across the hem of my boy shorts I was wearing "you'll know Liz. You'll feel it."

God, when and if the time ever came, I didn't know if I could handle the feelings it was going to bring me. I already felt like I was going to explode, I couldn't even imagine.

I nodded, knowing that right now wasn't the right 'time.' "What now?"

"Well, you need to get up. That's what I was doing before you oh so casually pulled me into bed with you. I have to hand it to you Liz. I didn't think you had it in you."

"What?" I scooted off of him and grabbed my shirt.

"Playing this role of seductresses. Though, you're welcome to bring her out any time. I quite enjoyed it."

I blushed at his comment. I wasn't anything of the sort. I was just a girl who had gotten too ahead of herself for a moment. God only knows what I would've done had Jasper allowed us to continue. As much as I wanted it, I had to be truthful with myself and admit that I wasn't really ready for something like that.

I dressed quickly, Jasper and I finally making our way back downstairs. He stayed with me in the kitchen today and I was thankful for that. He seemed a bit more at ease with me today and I was going to take full advantage of it.

He helped me a little bit, but mostly he was just there to keep me company.

"I hope you believe what I said earlier?" I cast him a sideways glance as I chopped vegetables for the salad. "You both know I have no reason to lie to you."

He nodded. "We're just worried. We don't want you getting sick that's all. If father had any sense at all, he wouldn't be force you to keep this unhealthy weight. It's not perfection. It's just another sick way that he's in control of you."

"I can't do much about it." We both knew that was true. No matter how much I hated father, I could never disobey him. As always, he was right and everyone else was wrong. What other choice did I have?

I finished dinner just as they returned from work. Always on time, I quickly set the table as they freshened up. As soon as I saw them walking into the dining room I knew something was up.

While mom looked a bit hesitant, father seemed to be in a good mood. Not only that though. He actually had the smallest trace of a smile on his face. That was never a good thing. Father was unreadable sometimes and this was one of those moments.

I'd witnessed firsthand how quickly a smile could turn into a sneer, resulting in a slap across the face.

Jasper and Edward noticed too as they sat down at the table while I began bringing out the food.

"Eliza, hurry up and come sit." I was already serving the last plate and I complied instantly. "There is something we need to discuss young lady."

I felt my heart skip a beat. Oh God, what had I done now? "Yes father?" I tried not to show any fear, trying to keep my voice monotone.

"How long have you and Jacob been dating young lady?"

I did a quick calculation. "Almost a month, sir."

"And why is that your mother and I have yet to meet him?"

I didn't have an answer good enough. "You're always so busy father and I didn't want to bother you." That was somewhat true. I tried to keep far away from him as possible.

"Bullshit." He spat and I cringed. I knew that wasn't going to work. "Eliza you never think do you?"

I didn't respond.

"Just as I suspected. Well fortunately for you I covered up your carelessness, what you've neglected to do."

"Okay." I hadn't the slightest idea what he was talking about.

"I talked with Jacob's father today and I invited him and his family over for dinner tomorrow night."

I almost dropped my fork. He did what? "Tomorrow?" That was so soon! There was no way I could prepare for something like that in a day.

"Did you not hear me girl?" His voice raised a fraction and I nodded quickly to appease him. "They'll be here tomorrow at four so I expect this house to be spotless and dinner to be perfect. You are to make sure of all that Eliza. If it's anything less, it will not result in anything good for you. Do you understand?"

"Yes. I'll make sure of it."

"Good. Now," He ate the last bit of food on his plate before standing up "Esme, let's go. We cannot be out late tonight if we're to have guests tomorrow."

"Yes dear." Mom stood, kissing us all on the cheek before heading upstairs to change.

The three of us sat around the table, no one saying a word for a few minutes.

"Will this is just fucking great." Jasper spoke first, leaning on his elbows. "What the hell are you going to do now?"

I shook my head and stood up. "We're going to give father what he wants. He wants a happy, perfect family then we'll be just that. It's only a few hours, we can do it."

My brothers looked at me like I was crazy. "Besides, with Jacob and his family here father cannot hurt us. That's three or four hours of being able to breathe normally that we normally don't have."

"She has a point, Jazz." Edward nodded. "Even if we're going to be pretending to live these great lives, at least we'll be somewhat safe."

I nodded, coming around the table to sit next to Jasper. I took his hand and pressed my forehead against his shoulder, my silent asking him if he was okay. Of course, I knew he wasn't really okay, but I needed to know that he would be able to make it through tomorrow. I didn't want to hurt him. That was always my main concern. Though, I'm sure I was hurting him every day.

He nodded after a minute, turning quickly to kiss the top of my head. "It's alright, Liz. We'll do what we have to." I knew he wasn't happy, but I knew better than to press further.

Edward came over too, placing his hands on our shoulders. "We can handle it Liz."

I nodded, desperately wanting to believe them.

********

Saturday morning came quicker than planned and, after making breakfast for everyone, mom and I went to the grocery store. We always just had enough for the five of us so we needed to pick up some things to cook for Jacob and his family.

We shopped quickly, knowing that father expected us to return as soon as possible. I was surprised that he didn't join us on this adventure. He was always so strict and loved watching our every move. I was thankful for it though. I was nervous as hell, but at least I had my mother to try and calm my fears while we shopped and drove back home.

"Don't worry sweetie. Everything's going to be fine." She reached over and squeezed my hand as we pulled into the driveway. Sure, it was easy for her to say. She too thought I was in a real relationship with Jacob.

We were pretty good at convincing people at school, but today we were going to be center stage for bother my parents and his. Would we be able to pull it off? I honestly hoped so.

I silently prayed throughout the day, wanting nothing more than for things to be okay. It was just a few hours. It's what I kept reminding myself of. A few hours of pretending was all I needed to get through this. I hoped Jacob would do most of the talking. I hadn't had enough time to plan for this, to think of fabrications to tell people when they asked questions.

After cooking all day, I finally went upstairs around two to take a shower and get dressed. I had asked mom what I should wear and she quickly suggested a dress. I didn't know how to feel about that, but trusted her enough to listen. She knew father better than anyone else and I'm sure that would please him as all.

I rummaged through my closet, trying to find a dress that was both suitable as long as attractive. I, after all, was having my 'boyfriend' over so I couldn't wear just anything.

I finally settled on a dark blue dress that came right to my knees and covered any lingering bruises while still having enough skin exposed. It was flowing, so at least it didn't look like I was trying too hard. I blow dried my hair and curled it quickly, letting it cascade down to my shoulders.

After swiping some lip-gloss on, I slipped on a pair of black heels. They weren't too high, so I knew I'd be comfortable in them tonight. I normally didn't wear them, but knew I had to look my best.

My stomach was in knots as I walked outside my room, Jasper coming out from his at almost exact same time. We both stopped and took each other in. Though this was my date, he looked incredibly handsome dressed in jeans and black button down.

He approached me, taking my hand in his and giving me a spin. When he completed it, he tugged my closer and looked down at me. I could see that look in his eyes again and I swallowed thickly, not wanting to look away.

"Beautiful." He leaned down, brushing his lips against mine chastely. He knew it all had to be quick, we were standing in the middle of the hallway after all. When he came closer, the scent of the cologne he was wearing washed over me and I slid my eyes closed for a second.

Forget handsome, everything about Jasper in this moment screamed sexy. I wanted him to take me away from all this, but we both knew it wasn't possible.

One last kiss and we knew our time together was done just as the doorbell rang.

I left Jasper standing upstairs, trying my best to rush to the living room without falling.

I blew out a deep breath.

Here we go.

**Jacob**

Somehow Liz's father had convinced mine that it would be a great idea for all of us to officially meet. While it didn't seem like that bad of an idea, I knew that this situation was both different and complicated. For one, Liz and I weren't actually dating and I honestly wasn't sure if we'd be able to convince our parents that we were. I would try, but there was guarantee.

By the time we got to Liz's house and walked to the door, I got a little nervous. This would be the first time we were together around our parents. As we waited for someone to answer I suddenly, for some reason, got the feeling that I needed to stick by Liz and really show them that we had a…well, that we had an actual relationship. We had to make sure everything looked real.

The door eventually opened and we were greeted by one of Liz's brothers. I think his name was Edward. He smiled and let us in.

"It's very nice to meet you." He shook all of our hands. "Please, come in. Everyone should be in the living room by now." He was oddly polite for someone our age.

Liz's parents were the next in the line, standing there together. After our parents exchanged hellos, it was my turn. I was nervous as fuck, not knowing what they were going to think of me.

I said hello to her father first, his firm grip as he shook my hand. He nodded, seemingly pleased with something.

"Jacob, honey, it's so nice to finally meet you." Liz's mother hugged me tightly and quickly. "I'm glad you and your family could join us for dinner." She was smiling at me, but something seemed a bit off. She looked happy enough so I just let it go. What did I know about these people.

I saw Liz's other brother standing with Edward, but he made no effort to come say anything to me. He greeted my parents so I suppose that was enough. My worries about him were long forgotten when I saw Liz come into view.

She looked nervous, but nerves could never overshadow the sex appeal that girl exuded. She was so innocent and it made her that much more appealing to me. We crossed the living room, meeting each other half way.

"You look beautiful babe." I hugged her and held her close for a second, letting her go before she got uncomfortable.

I grabbed her hand and led her to the loveseat where we sat side by side, not once letting go of each other's hands. It was almost like she was hanging on for dear life, scared to let go and be washed out to sea.

We sat there, listening to the parents make small talk about work, until finally our relationship was brought up.

"So, how did you two meet," Liz's dad asked, looking at me with a stern glare. Shit, this guy made me nervous.

"Well, we.." Liz started, but was quickly cut off by her father.

"I was speaking to Jacob, Eliza." He was a bit short with her and she stopped talking right away. Guess I'd be the one to make up the story.

"Well, we have class together and the first day I started, I saw her and thought she was beautiful. I talked to her, and we became friends and quickly realized that we liked each other." I said, sending Liz a small smile and squeezing her hand. She returned the smile, seeming to relax just a little bit.

It was a real generic answer, but no one needed to know that.

"They do make a darling couple, don't they Esme?" My mother smiled at us.

Oh, god they weren't going down this road were they? I felt Liz tense beside me and I knew she caught on too.

"Yes, Jacob is a very handsome young man. Eliza was very fortunate in capturing his heart."

"Can you imagine," dad joined in the conversation, looking at us "if those two were to ever have children?"

Were they fucking kidding? Jesus, it was one thing for our moms to be acting like this, but the men were another thing.

"Yes, yes I can see it." Liz's father threw her a glare and her eyes widened. "That would be very good."

"Are they planning our lives out over there?" I glanced over at Liz who just looked at me helplessly.

"I have no idea. Um, Jake?" She raised her voice with the second part of her question. "Will you help me?" She was already up on her feet. I didn't know what she needed help with, but I went with her, desperate to get away from this awkward conversation.

We walked into the kitchen and she began pulling out plates and checking on the food.

She handed me some, but I didn't move.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing, it's just…you called me Jake. You always call me Jacob."

"Oh," she looked away for a second "would you prefer I didn't call you that?"

I shook my head. "Course not. Besides, I like it. Must mean you really do like me."

She stopped, looking surprised by my comment. So surprised that one of the plates slipped out of her hand and shattered when it hit the floor.

"Shit." She was on her knees before I could even blink, her hands picking up the shards of glass.

"Liz," I set the other plates on the counter "what the hell are you thinking?" I kneeled slightly and reached my hand out towards her. She had an odd reaction, shutting her eyes as her bottom lip seemed to be trembling. What the hell was that all about?

"Liz?" I called her name softly this time, reaching out again and wrapped my hand around hers to open it. She did after a minute and I plucked the shard from her hand. I looked at her, concerned over the look on her face. She seemed…scared. It didn't make sense. There was no reason for her to be scared of me.

"I'm sorry." She took a deep breath, allowing me to help her stand up.

"Why are you apologizing? And why are you picking up broken glass?"

"I just…I had to."

"No," I stepped over it so I could be closer to her "you could hurt yourself. You shouldn't be picking it up with your bare hands."

She nodded. "Sorry," she laughed nervously "I overreacted I guess."

"Are you okay? You seem a little scared about something?"

"I'm fine." She answered quickly. "I just need to clean this up and get dinner on the table that's all."

"You sure?" I didn't know if I should believe her or not. She had just did a one eighty on me and I didn't really know what to do about it.

"Yes, I'm sure." Her voice was normal again as she pulled out another plate before cleaning up broken glass.

After helping her, everyone began gathering around the table. Our parents took up one side while the four children took up the other. I sat beside Liz, the two us across from Edward and Jasper.

Dinner was served and we began to eat in silence.

My dad and Liz's father started talking about business, while our moms started chatting about some book that they both happened to be reading. It was getting louder at the table, the four of them laughing and carrying on. Which, it left the rest of us to fend for ourselves.

I didn't really know what to say here. I had a feeling Liz's brothers didn't like me, but I still wanted to try to at least talk to them.

"So..." I said, hoping to start something, anything.

"So, what?" Jasper nearly spat out at me.

"Um," Shit, did all the guys in this family have to be so intimidating? "Well, what do you guys do for fun?" I asked, feeling like a complete idiot. It was the first thing that popped into my mind to ask.

Edward laughed and sent a look towards his sister.

"Well, we all play some sort of instrument. Edward's a very talented writer, Jasper can do amazing things with a camera and I like to pain on occasion. What about you Jake?" Liz replied, sending both her brothers a mean stare before turning back to me.

"Well I used to be all about video games, but lately I've been obsessed with fixing cars. In fact I'm working on a car right now that's going to be stunning when I'm all done with it. You'll have to come for a ride when it's all fixed Liz."

She nodded and I was glad that she was actually having a conversation with me.

We talked a little more before Jasper interrupted us, his voice so low that I almost didn't hear him.

"Why are you doing this?" he asked, making sure no one but us heard.

"Doing what?" I tried to play it off, but I knew what he was talking about.

"Being nice to us and pretending to date Liz. What's in it for you, beside homework help? Cause if you think for a second that you're going to get lucky with her, your dead wrong." His words were cold and it was almost like he was threatening me.

I guess her brothers knew what was really going on so I had no reason to lie to him. I also realized that he wasn't okay with this situation at all.

"I'm helping her and she's helping me. I like her, but I'm not the type of guy to expect...well that. I know better. I would never force something like that on her either. I'm not a bad guy, and if you would give me half a chance, you would realize that too. I'm not trying to get anything from Liz. I hope you can realize that someday." I glared right back at him.

"Fucker." He muttered under his breath, but I heard him. "You're a fucking liar."

"Think what you want about me, but your sister likes me and that's all that matters to me."

That seemed to strike a nerve with him and he looked like he was going to say something, but when he saw the look on his sister's face he kept his mouth shut.

I spent the rest of the time talking with Liz, occasionally saying something to Edward.

Once the meal was done, her mom brought out dessert for everyone. Our parents moved out back to the living room, leaving the four of us alone in the dining room. I felt like I could breathe a bit easier, knowing that Edward and Jasper both knew about the situation.

I decided to take a chance and have some fun with Liz. It looked like she needed it. I dipped my finger in the whipped cream on my plate and ran a little line down the side of her face.

"Jake," she turned to face me, shaking her head "what...what are you doing?"

She must have seen the playful smile on my face, because she quickly dipped her finger as well and put it on my nose. I laughed, drawing the attention of not only the two boys, but the adults as well. Three of the four parents laughed, her dad just staring at us.

She wiped my nose off and I wiped her cheek off, placing a soft kiss there once it was clean. It tasted of strawberries and cream, and it was one hell of an intoxicating scent. I wondered briefly if every part of her tasted just as sweet, but I pushed those ideas to the back of my mind.

"You're too much." She laughed, picking at the rest of her dessert.

We spent the rest of the time talking back and forth, me casually flirting with the girl beside me. She blushed a few times when I said certain things and I was glad I could at least make her feel good. She was a beautiful girl and deserved someone telling her these things. And, it might as well be me. Who else would tell her?

Liz was intriguing to me and I wanted to know more about her. Having seen how she interacted with her family and so forth, I was starting to get a glimpse into who she really was. Which, that would be vital if this relationship was going to continue.

**Liz**

Jake was telling me all these things, some things that even Jasper had never said to me. They were sweet of course, but something about it all seemed off. I didn't feel those same butterflies I did when I was with Jasper. It wasn't fair to Jacob, I knew that, but yet it wasn't stopping me. I just hoped that I didn't somehow hurt him in the long run.

Around eight or so, Jake's father said that it was time they headed back home. I was silently relieved and disappointed. The night had come to an end and I wasn't sure if I wanted to hear what father had to say once this was all over.

I stood and told Jake I'd walk with him to his car. After saying goodbye to my parents, we walked outside.

As we walked, I noticed that his parents weren't following behind. Odd, being as they were the ones who said it was time for them to leave.

Reaching the car, Jake laughed nervously. "They're watching us you know?"

"Who?" I began to turn my head, but he stopped me when his hand came to rest on my cheek, keeping his eyes on me. "Jake, I…"

"Just go with it." His words were rushed before stepping in towards me, lips attaching themselves to my own. With his one hand still on my cheek, the other came and snaked around my waist. Like always, he was extremely warm even though it was rather windy outside.

When I felt my back bump slightly against the car door, my eyes snapped open for a second and that's when I saw them. Standing still in the doorway where Jacob's parents and mine. Though they weren't looking right at us, it was clear they knew what was going on.

Knowing father would be less than pleased with me if this night didn't end on a high note, I allowed Jake to briefly deepen the kiss between us. It was awkward, kissing him this way. Sure the first kiss had been soft and sweet, but this one was different. I could tell he wanted to take it further, but was restraining himself as best he could.

I knew this was all about putting on a show, but a part of me had to believe that he was kissing me this way for his own reasons. I didn't find it selfish. I just found it a bit uncomfortable. Not to say he was a horrible kisser, it was just that something seemed all wrong about it.

After what seemed like forever, he broke the kiss and rested his forehead against mine. I glanced up at him and smiled softly, knowing it was the only thing I could give him at the moment.

"Thanks for an interesting evening yet again." He teased gently and I pushed his shoulder playfully.

"Thank you for everything." I knew he knew what I meant and he nodded quickly. I hesitantly wrapped my arms around his waist and hugged him briefly.

Kissing the top of my head, we eventually pulled away completely. "See you on Monday babe."

I nodded. "See you on Monday."

His parents came outside soon after, the three of them leaving. I was almost scared to turn and face father. I never knew what to expect.

As I walked up the driveway, I saw movement from behind them. I knew it was Jasper walking upstairs. He clearly didn't want to see me right now, I just knew it. Hell, I wouldn't want to see myself right now either.

I had not been planning on that kiss with Jake, but it happened and I couldn't take it back.

It, after all, was all about the show. The show to please the man who I was now standing in front of.

He stepped forward, curling his hand around my arm. "You had a few slip ups Eliza. If they happen again, I will not be as gentle." Before I could respond, he twisted my arm roughly and I felt as if I would fall from the intense pain that shot up through my body.

He let go of me, pushing me back into the house. "Go clean up the kitchen young lady and then get your ass in bed."

I nodded, rushing past him and straight into the kitchen.

No one was in there with me and I was silently thankful. It gave me a chance to think about everything that had happened over the past two days.

I thought about how foolishly I had acted in front of Jake when I dropped that damn plate. He didn't seem to fully believe me when I claimed to have simply overreacted. I couldn't afford to let something like that happen again.

I came to the conclusion that I was currently torn. Not torn between Jake and Jasper though. No, I felt torn between appeasing my father and keeping my sanity. I knew this plan was working, it was evident to the three of us.

As I rubbed my arm, wincing in pain, I wondered if it was even worth it.

Was any of this worth it anymore?

Dear God I hoped so.

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**Longest chapter thus far & I'm pretty excited about that. So tell me what you guys thought about the little Jasper/Liz scene, or the coming over for dinner part. Or anything in general! Jake is slowly but surely making his presence known in this story. **

**Reviews are always greatly appreciated! This will probably be the last chapter I post before Christmas so merry Christmas to everyone and I hope you all enjoy the holiday!  
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	14. Too Close For Comfort

**AN: Thanks to my lovely readers for the amazing reviews. Hope you all enjoyed your Holiday and hope you enjoy this next chapter. **

**Lindsey, thanks for the amazing scene you helped me create this chapter! :) And thank you to my room mate, who showed me these fabulous lyrics!  
**

**As always, all I own is Liz & her thoughts and actions.**

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**CH 14: Too Close For Comfort**

**Was I invading in on your secrets  
Was I too close for comfort  
You're pushing me out  
When I wanted in  
What was I just about to discover  
I got too close for comfort  
Driving you home  
Guess I'll never know**

**Liz**

After that awkward night between Jake's family and my own, things seemed to simmer down a little bit. There were no more secret announcements by father and no sudden outbursts from Jasper.

All in all, things were relatively calm.

Jake and I spent the following two weeks the same, still pretending that we were in a relationship.

I hadn't told anyone, but the few moments I had with him every day were beginning to become something I depended on. Not just because I needed him to go along with this for God only knows how long, but when I was with him things seemed okay. Things seemed…well, they seemed normal.

And I desperately needed someone like him in my life. Someone who had no idea about the life I led at home, someone who could be my friend without feeling sorry for me.

I had stopped worrying about lines being blurred somewhat the more I got to know him. I, of course, still had my apprehensions as to why he agreed so quickly, but I tried not to focus on that so much.

Jake was turning out to be an amazing friend, which was something I hadn't been expecting from him. Besides my brothers, he was the only person I talked to. Well, he almost always did most of the talking. Once you got him going on a topic that interested him it was almost impossible to get him to stop. Which, that was a good thing. The less we talked about me the better.

Everything he told me, even the little details, I stored away in the back of my mind for future reference. You never knew when someone would spring a question on you about your boyfriend. I had to be prepared at all times.

*******

"Why are you so nervous babe?" I glanced up from my Biology book, turning to look at Jake. I gave him a knowing look, to which he just laughed at.

"Oh come on, it's not that bad. It's just a test."

I nodded quietly, my eyes flickering back to the book. It was so easy for him to say. I briefly thought back to the last Biology test took and how that had all turned out. There was no way I could do badly on this one. Luckily all the quizzes between the two tests had raised my grade, but that didn't matter if I failed this test. Father knew we were taking it today and would be expecting to hear the results in exactly one week.

"Liz, stop for a second will you?" I dropped my pencil, startled by his voice after a few more minutes of silence. We had opted to come into the library to study for our test next period. Though, I seemed to be the only one studying while Jake just watched me out of the corner of his eye.

"You need to seriously relax, stressing over the test isn't going to help you."

"I know," I whispered "I…I just have to pass this one."

"You will. Come here." He pulled my chair a little bit closer to his, his hand coming to rest on the base of my neck. By instinct I lowered my head a fraction when he started moving his hand in small circles over my sweater.

"You're smart Liz so I don't know why you're so worried."

"I have to be perfect," I mumbled under my breath, but he heard me.

He snickered. "Bull, you're already perfect."

"You have to say that." I opened one of my eyes and cast him a sideways glance. It was then that I realized that he was doing this, being extremely caring, when it was just the two of us in here.

Before he could respond and before I could dwell on that thought much longer the bell shrilled, signaling that time was up.

Jake's hand was off of me as I quickly grabbed my things and tossed them in my bag.

"Well I don't have to, but I think sometimes you need a bit of a reminder of how amazing you really are."

I shook my head, allowing him to take my hand as we walked out and towards our class.

It was odd to have him tell me these things, but there was a selfish part of me that enjoyed hearing them. His words always seemed genuine, a warmness in his voice that made me feel good about myself.

We walked into class, Jake kissing my cheek before he let go of my hand. "You'll do great."

I thanked him for his encouragement and took my seat. I had a good three minutes to study before class started.

Somewhere during those three minutes Jasper showed up, sitting beside me with a concerned look on his face.

"You're worried aren't you?"

"Very," I looked up at him "you know I have to do good Jasper."

Nodding, he quickly placed his hand over mine. "I know you will Liz. We've been studying this shit all week, I know you'll pass."

I could see the memory of the last time flash before his eyes for a minute. It wasn't so easy to forget for either of us. He had hit me, my own brother, but I never once blamed him for it. He didn't have a choice. We knew it would've been so much worse for the both of us.

I turned my hand and squeezed it, letting it go just as our professor walked through the doors. She told us to clear our desks right away, the thing we were allowed to have out was a pencil.

I strummed my fingers nervously on the table top as I waited for her to hand out the exam. As soon as it was in my hands, I tried to block out everything around me and focus solely on the test.

Having barely answered the last question, the bell rang once more and we were told to put our pencils down and leave the tests on the tables as we left the classroom. I glanced over it one more time, silently praying I did well before I stood up and started walking away.

Having apparently been walking too slow, my brothers and Jake were all waiting for me, their gazes all meeting mine as I stepped foot in the hallway.

"I think it went okay," I breathed a sigh of relief "not perfect, but hopefully good enough."

"See," Edward stepped forward and wrapped an arm around my shoulders "I knew you could do it."

I gave him a sideways hug, turning to face Jasper and Jake. "How did you boys do?"

They both shrugged and I thought it was quite comical. "Well I'm sure you both passed, you're extremely smart when it comes to Science."

"Enough talk of school, let's get going." Walking with Edward towards out locker, I looked behind me for the briefest seconds. Turning bag I felt the tiniest smile tugging at the corners of my lips.

"What's so funny?" Edward gave me bemused look. I nodded behind me slightly and followed my gaze.

"They're like your bodyguards." He teased and I nudged him in the ribs.

True enough Jake and Jasper were walking behind us. They obviously weren't talked, they were hardly walking side by side, but they were still close enough to the other.

I knew it didn't mean anything, but at least they seemed to be calm at the moment and not going at each other's throats. That was always a good sign.

Stopping to grab my things Jake leaned against the locker to my right and watched and waited patiently for me to finish. I had tried to tell him that he didn't have to wait for me, but he felt inclined to wait for me every day and walk me to the car.

I tossed in my Biology book, thankful I wouldn't have to look at it for a few days, and grabbed my math book and my English notebook. From beside me I heard Jake groan in discontentment.

"What?" I stuffed the things in my bag and shut my locker.

"We have those papers due next week don't we?"

I raised an eyebrow at him. "You haven't started it yet?" He shook his head. "Jake, we were assigned those papers three weeks ago."

He pouted slightly. "I know. Maybe you can help me this weekend? Are you doing anything before the luncheon?"

I knit my brows together and cast a glance at my brothers. "Luncheon?"

"Yea, the one tomorrow at that mansion or something?"

I honestly had no idea what he was talking about, but I didn't want to look like an idiot.

"Oh right," I smiled sheepishly "I don't think I'll be busy before then."

"Perfect, I'll stop by early so you can help me." It wasn't a question and under other circumstances I would've protested, but I knew this was part of the deal. I hadn't really helped him since this arrangement began so I figured it was time to help him. Just as long as I didn't write his actual paper, I figured it would be alright.

"Ok, um, well I'll see you tomorrow early then." I took the routine few steps towards him, allowing him to give me the now usual goodbye. Wrapping his arms around me tightly, he kissed the top of my head followed by my forehead before letting me go.

"Later," He nodded towards my brothers before taking off. I sucked in a deep breath and began walking with Jasper and Edward towards the parking lot.

"You think father will be okay with him coming over?"

Jasper scoffed as we reached the car. "Please, father agrees to anything that has to do with Jacob. You'll be fine Liz, no worries." Though he was clearly irritated, at least he wasn't making a big scene about it.

********

When our parents came home after work we learned about this luncheon that we would be attending the following day.

The entire company would be there and we were to be on our best behavior according to father. I watched Jasper, his features that of disgust. He had never been fond of father treating us all like we were still children. We were practically adults and yet, when it came to going out in public, it was almost like he was ashamed of us.

I don't think we had ever been rude or reckless in any of our endeavors. No, we were too terrified to even speak sometimes for fear of what would happen when he got home.

Where father came up with these ideas sometimes was beyond me, but we knew better than to ever question him.

"Eliza, Esme I expect you to look perfect tomorrow. I will not allow the two women in my life to look foolish and sloppy. I expect that you each have a suitable dress for the occasion?"

I nodded. "I have the perfect one." I knew I had a dress somewhere in my closet that would fit the bill. At least I hoped I did.

"So do I darling, don't you worry about it."

"Very well then, the same goes for you two as well." He nodded over at Jasper and Edward. "Clean cut and respectable."

The rest of the evening passed in relative silence. Mother and father didn't go out because we had to wake up early tomorrow so I didn't get to spend my evening with Jasper in the way I had planned.

We did get to spend time together though.

Well, he and Edward did. They were in my room with me for a few hours as they helped me decide what to wear. Though fashion wasn't Jasper's forte, he still had a keen eye about what would be the 'perfect' dress that met all of father's requirements.

"You're going to look so fucking beautiful." His arms lingered around my waist as he and Edward went to leave me for the night. "I just wish it was my arm you were going to be on instead of his." He whispered the latter part.

I nodded. "Me too, more than anything" I stood up higher on my toes, hoping he'd get the hint and kiss me before he left.

He did, slipping one of hands under my chin to close the gap between us. It was soft, sweet and quick. When he pulled away I, like always, felt myself wanting more.

Jasper noticed right away, a knowing look on his face. "I know Liz, I know. I always need more."

"Alright enough you two," Edward literally had to push Jasper out the door, turning quickly to tell me goodnight.

After they were done I changed into my pajamas and settled in for the night, switching the light off and crawling into bed.

I was out only a few moments after my head hit the pillow. My body seemed to crave sleep these days and welcomed it at all hours.

I could only hope that tomorrow would be okay and wouldn't cause anyone unneeded stress. Because God only knows we already had enough of that.

********

The following morning came far too soon, but I knew it was a must. Waking up no later than seven thirty I made sure I had breakfast ready for not only father, but the rest of the family.

Even though I was exhausted I rather enjoyed the fact that we'd be eating together. It was something we didn't do a whole lot on the weekends. Father always read the paper on Saturday mornings so he barely paid attention to us as we sat around the dining room table eating eggs, bacon and toast. It was simple, but it did the job.

Soon after everyone house erupted into commotion as we all got ready for this afternoon. I had mentioned to father that Jake would be stopping by and, like Jasper said, he didn't throw that much of a fit.

Well, I stand corrected. He _did _get a bit upset with me for not asking permission before hand. I had made the mistake of asking him while I stood beside the dining room table. So when he grew angry, he shoved me backwards and I had slammed my leg into the corner of the table, resulting in a medium sized bruise on my upper thigh.

I showered quickly, Jake saying he'd be here at ten. It was nine when I stepped out of the shower and began getting dressed.

Between me and my brothers I had chosen the perfect dress. It was a pale pink chiffon summer dress with floral prints on it and light ruffles up top. It was sleeveless so, in order to cover up fading bruises, I threw a pink sweater over it. I slipped on the pair of white sandals and my charm bracelet before the outfit was complete, my dress covering the bruise pretty well.

I dried and curled my hair, applying only a little bit of makeup just as I heard a knock on my door.

"Come in," I glanced at my reflection in the mirror. When the door opened and quickly closed I looked up and was startled to see who it was.

"Jake," I squeaked "you're early." I glanced at the clock. He was ten minutes early.

He didn't say anything for a minute. "You…shit, you look nice." He stammered and I blushed at his comment. "Is it okay that I'm up here?"

"Um," I thought about it for a moment "yes, it's fine."

He held up his notebook. "I'm in dire need of your help."

"Alright, well come on." I sat on my bed, being as I didn't have a desk or anything. I glanced over our assignment again. We weren't in the same class, but we had the same English teacher.

We had just finished reading the book _Night_ and our assignment was to choose one word and base the paper around it. We would draw on quotes and themes from the book as well as our own personal experiences if we wanted to.

I sat around with Jake for a good hour as we considered what he would write about. I had chosen the word numb and wrote about how the people would detach themselves from their situation and tried to find some kind of hope in the harsh, cruel reality they endured.

After that, Jake decided he'd write around the word sacrifice.

"I can't even imagine," he stood and walked around my room "detaching yourself because your life was absolute hell. I don't know how people could do it for so long. I'd crack."

I gave him a shrug. "Some people do what they have to in order to escape their reality. Sometimes it's not a choice. It's something they have to do to make it through each day."

He turned and looked at me, a curious look on his face. "I guess I never thought of it like that."

He looked like he was going to continue on that thought, but thankfully something caught his eye.

"Do you play?" Turning towards him I saw he was nodding towards the closet.

Confused, I approached it and pulled it open a bit, sighing when I saw the guitar nestled in the corner. "I used to." That wasn't a lie. I hadn't picked up that thing in a few years.

"Then you still know how to." Laughing he reached past me and picked it up off the ground and held it out to me. "Will you play it for me?"

I shook my head. "I'm not very good."

"Please?" His brown eyes seemed to grow bigger, reminding me of a puppy. Though I knew he wouldn't be upset if I continued to say no, something pushed me forward and I took the instrument out of his hand.

"Fine." I sat on the edge of my bed and held it carefully in my hands. I really did love playing the guitar, regardless of the fact that father pushed me until my fingers would bleed. Sitting, I realized that no one had ever asked me to play for them, not even my own brothers. It seemed odd, being as I always asked them to play the piano for me. Did they not think I was talented enough, not good enough?

Deciding I was reading too much into that, I started strumming random chords while I thought about a song to play. I was rusty at first, but I soon found the rhythm all over again.

Having only intended to play, I soon found myself softly singing. It wasn't loud by any means, but I was certain that Jake could hear me. His eyes flickered back and forth between my face and my hands. Even I had to admit, plucking at those strings, there was something highly sensual about it. The way they felt underneath my fingers, it made me think of Jasper for some reason and the way he touched me. He treated me carefully, just how I played the chords softly.

_I am outside  
And I've been waiting for the sun  
With my wide eyes  
I've seen worlds that don't belong  
My mouth is dry with words I cannot verbalize  
Tell me why we live like this_

_Keep me safe inside  
Your arms like towers  
Tower over me_

_Yeah  
Cause we are broken  
What must we do to restore  
Our innocence  
And all the promise we adored  
Give us life again cause we just wanna be whole_

_Lock the doors  
Cause I'd like to capture this voice  
That came to me tonight  
So everyone will have a choice  
And under red lights  
I'll show myself it wasn't forged  
We're at war  
We live like this_

_Tower over me  
Tower over me  
...and I'll take the truth at any cost._

_Cause we are broken  
What must we do to restore  
Our innocence  
And all the promise we adored  
Give us life again cause we just wanna be whole_

Finishing the song I set the guitar on the ground and looked back over at Jake. He was looking right back at me with a rather odd look on his face.

"What's wrong?" I briefly panicked, wondering if he had spotted a bruise or something. Quickly scanning my arms and legs, there was nothing visible for him to see. He still wasn't saying anything. "Are you okay?"

"Liz," his voice had a suddenly deeper and strained quality to it "I…fuck that was hot." He breathed out quickly right before grabbing me and pulling me close. His lips completely bypassed mine as he made a beeline straight towards my throat. With one hand behind my neck and the other resting on my leg, he had me completely trapped. Lips and fingertips skimmed over my skin, he touch almost inhumanly warm.

While to any other girl the thought and feeling of her boyfriend touching her closely would feel like heaven, to me this felt completely wrong. I liked Jake, but not like that. I was Jasper's, and this was so wrong on so many levels.

I felt Jake's lips on my neck, and instantly stiffened. Other then Jasper, no one had ever really been this close to me. It didn't feel like it did with Jasper, but it didn't feel horrible either. I shouldn't be doing this, this relationship was all fake. This could hurt so many people. I was Jasper's and even though Jake didn't know that, he knew that this stuff was for the public eye. There was no one around and yet here he was, attacking my throat. I didn't know what to do. Stop him, and risk the chance of him calling this quits, or let him continue and hurt everyone else.

"Jake," I breathed heavily, the warmth of his skin nearly overpowering "Jake please…" I was trying to stop him, especially since his hand was moving a bit higher on my leg. Any further and he was liable to come across my bruise. That _couldn't _happen.

Thinking quickly, I moved my hand and placed it on top of his. He misread my words and action completely. Taking it as a green light instead of red he took my hand, using it to yank me into his lap. He still had the other hand on my neck, and was now holding my hand very possessively to his chest.

I shouldn't be doing this. I should stop him. If someone were to walk in now, there would be hell to pay. He left my neck, moving his face in front of mine. He placed a few soft, open mouth kisses to my lips and the surrounding area, before he swiped his tongue across my bottom lip. He was obviously asking for permission and I had no idea what to do now. Open my mouth and continue letting him do what he wanted, or keep my mouth shut and hope he stopped.

Deciding we couldn't continue doing this, I tried to move away from him. He was too strong though, his hand sliding down my neck to my back, fingers tracing little patterns before coming around and resting his hand on my thigh again. Still holding my other hand tightly, I felt myself beginning to freeze up and his fingers inched upward.

"Jake!" I squeaked, his hand lingering right underneath my bruise. _No, no he cannot see this! _Since I couldn't break out of his grasp, I could only try to jerk my body away from him. I failed miserably. "We can't…" He paid no attention to me so I did the only thing I could do. Taking his hand, I grabbed it and moved it away from my leg.

"Liz," he stared at our clasped hands "let me?"

Let him what? Oh God he was reading too much into this. "But," I tried to find my voice.

"I know," he nodded "but I really want to." He soon was in the midst of moving our hands when he stopped all the sudden. My heart felt like it was going to stop. Eyes cast downward, he had spotted it. Only from yesterday, the purple and black stain on my leg wasn't hard to miss.

"What…what happened?" His voice dropped, this time from impending anger.

A battle arose in my mind. If I told him the truth would he believe me, or would he think I was crazy. Would he tell other people, therefore landing father in immense trouble? Oh God, would father find out and take it out not only on me but on Edward and Jasper as well?? That last thought sealed it for me. I just couldn't do it.

"I fell." He looked up at me, eyes searching mine. "In the shower." That was no better. These excuses were typical.

"Liz," his hands were off me for a moment only to softly touch my face a few moments later "Liz tell me please."

I shook my head. "There's nothing to tell." There was no sadness in my voice, no strain as I lied straight to his face. I felt horrible. It was killing me on the inside.

His fingers brushed gently over the bruise and I bit my lip to stop the truth from pouring out.

"You should be more careful," his voice was low, eyes fixated on the mark.

"I know." Our hands still clasped I squeezed it gently "I can be rather clumsy sometimes."

"Yea," He nodded, looking up to meet my gaze. "I'm sorry I got carried away Liz, please tell me I didn't hurt you."

My eyes widened a fraction. "No of course not, I just know to not play the guitar around you anymore." I attempted to joke with him and break the tension.

It worked a little. "You're really good at that by the way."

Before I could answer there was a knock at the door and I quickly scrambled off of Jake's lap, fixing my dress just as Edward poked his head in.

"It's time to go," he smiled, turning to leave us quickly.

"I'd ask you to come with me, but I think you're dad wouldn't be too keen on that."

My laugh was short. "No, no he wouldn't. I'll see you over there though."

A quick hug and we both walked downstairs so he could leave and I could meet up with my family.

Father's eyes skimmed over my body as soon as Jake left. When I turned to look at him, he didn't miss a beat. "Go get in the car, Eliza." Even as I walked past him, he continued to stare at me. I didn't like it one bit and it made me feel utterly exposed.

Getting the car, I beside Jasper while Edward sat behind us.

All the while, I could think about was what had just happened upstairs.

I needed to talk about it with Jake before he started to get the wrong idea.

********

Over the years we had attended multiple company events that were sponsored by the company father worked for. Usually they were only for Christmas, but this year they decided it would be best If they held it in spring so that the even could be held outdoors.

Arriving, I met up with Jake as soon as I got out of the car. I walked quietly beside him, his hand slowly finding its way into mine as we approached the large group of people that were already there. I wasn't too comfortable with Jake, there still being some things we needed to discuss concerning what happened in my room just before it was time to leave.

I didn't know exactly how to bring it up and I wasn't sure if we'd even have a moment where I could talk to him in private.

The luncheon was taking place on the sprawling grounds of a mansion that was nestled in the hills twenty minutes outside of the city. Everything was being held outside. We must've greeted a hundred people before we eventually made it to our assigned table. We, of course, were at the same table as Jake and his family. My father no doubt had a say in the seating arrangements.

Just as we were sitting down, I saw a woman walking quickly towards me with a huge smile on her face.

"Eliza sweetheart is that you?" I turned fully and smiled at the woman coming towards me. She looked vaguely familiar, but I couldn't quite put my finger on where I knew her from. "Oh darling you look gorgeous." She embraced me tightly and as soon as I inhaled her perfume I remembered who she was.

"Mrs. Lawrence, it's so nice to see you again. How have you been?" I didn't know the last time I had seen this woman. My guess was three years ago at the annual Christmas party. She hadn't been to the other ones and I had wondered briefly if she had been fired or something.

"Oh, I'm doing just fine baby." She peered around me. "So the rumors are true. He is quite the looker honey." She patted my cheek lightly and I just gave her another smile.

"You two are a beautiful couple." She pointed between Jake and I. "Good thing you snatched this girl up Jacob. She's one of a kind." Wrapping her arm around my shoulders, she continued on this little speech for a few minutes before finally going to talk to my brothers.

"Is she an old friend of yours?" Jake teased as I sat down beside him.

I leaned in towards him, trying to keep my voice low. "I don't really know her all that great. She's just always been nice like that to me and my brothers. She's a good woman. She gets a little tipsy sometimes at these things, but she's just having a good time."

He laughed, nodded and sat up fully in his seat. "Good thing you're here with me. You seem to be in the know about all these people."

I shrugged. "Father's been working for the firm since we moved here. Half of these people have watched us grow up."

That wasn't technically true. We only saw these people once a year and we usually only spoke a few words to them, if anything.

"Liz, can I ask you something?"

"Yes of course."

"Do you have any more family outside of your brothers and parents?"

I was caught off guard by that question. No one had ever asked me that before.

"Um well," I pushed some of my hair behind my ears and stared at my hands "all I really ever had was my mother. I never knew my real father or any of his family. I'm sure they're out there somewhere, but he never tried to contact us. Most of my mother's family is still alive I'm sure, but they all live in New York and I haven't seen them since we moved here. I honestly don't even remember them. I was so young when she died. Esme has some family too, but they're all over the states I believe."

"Is that where you're from then? New York?"

I nodded. "Why do you ask?"

"I was just wondering. I haven't heard you talk about any other family members before. Maybe one day you should go visit them? I would go with you if you like. It might do you some good to see them."

I watched him, trying to get a read on him. "I suppose it would. Well, if I ever decide to go visit one day, then you're welcome to come with me."

He seemed pleased with that. "Good."

Our conversation shifted, but my mind was still on his first question. Why would he want to know about any members of my extended family? And why did he seem so adamant about me going to see them one day? It didn't really make sense, but I didn't feel right questioning him. Some people were just curious by nature and Jake seemed to be one of those people.

Lunch was served to us soon after everyone from the firm arrived. They brought us out salad first followed by pasta, chicken and roasted potatoes. Our plates were huge and I had no idea how I was going to eat all of it. I normally only ate half of what was in front of me.

Though he wasn't looking, I knew father was keeping an eye out. He had the exact same thing in front of him and I just knew he'd be counting the calories and sending a warning my way that no one would see.

Jasper and Edward were watching me as well. They were talking to each other, but I knew they were. After the little incident two weeks ago, they weren't going to let it go no matter how hard I tried to convince them.

I ate as much as I could, the food being sinfully delicious. I made a mental note to try and cook this at home one of these days. Surely this would be something acceptable for me to make for dinner. I knew that if I ate all of it father would criticize, but I also knew if I didn't father would think I was trying to offend the caterers the firm had commissioned for this.

In the end I was only able to eat half the plate, my stomach twisting in knots. I wasn't used to eating so much and I felt as if I would faint from the amount of food in body.

And then they brought out dessert. God, there was no way!

Still, I politely accepted the large slice of chocolate cake while Jake took a slice of cheesecake. He didn't seem to content with it and I silently hoped that he would want to trade. It was much smaller than the gigantic tower of chocolate in front of me.

"You don't like it?" I hedged, hoping he'd get the point.

"No, is yours good?"

"I haven't tried it yet."

"Well here," he cut a small piece and looked back at me "try mine and if you like it we can trade."

_Oh, thank goodness. _I went to take the fork from him, but he held it back.

When I gave him a look, that playful smirk crossed his face. "Let me give it to you."

I didn't have time to argue with him so I hesitantly leaned in towards him and parted my lips slightly. He slowly placed the fork in my mouth and I quickly took the piece of dessert that was on there. He watched me as I ate it, swallowing it slowly.

"I like that one."

"Well can I try yours first?" I almost slid my plate towards him, but I suddenly realized that he didn't want that. He wanted me to mimic his actions. I did just that. I cut a piece and offered it to him. His eyes never left mine as he took the piece of cake off the fork, licking his lips when he was done.

"I'll take it." He winked, switching our plates and I exhaled in relief. He had just done me a huge favor without even realizing it.

I picked at the cheesecake in front of me, slowing eating it, my stomach churning with every bite I took.

_Just eat this and you'll be fine. There'll be no more food until tomorrow so your stomach can rest._

I felt weak and pathetic by the time I was done, long after everyone else. I honestly didn't know what my body was trying to tell me. As much as I was terrified of father forcing me on a diet again, I wasn't about to sit around and not eat anything at all.

There was a lot more conversations after lunch, people constantly coming up to say hello to our parents and, surprisingly, to Jake and I. Some people said hello to Jasper and Edward, but the attention seemed to be mainly focused on the two of us.

About thirty minutes into all this chatting with people I didn't know, I felt Jake leaning over towards me again.

"Get up." I looked at him oddly. "Please?" He batted his eyes at me, in what I assumed was him trying to persuade me. Giving in to him I did what he asked and stood there for a good ten seconds before he took my hand and pulled into his lap.

Wrapping an arm loosely around my waist, he rested his head on my shoulder. "Much better don't you think?"

"Better for what?"

He laughed, shaking his head. "I'm just making us look like a real couple Liz. What normal teenagers sit side by side?"

"I guess you have a point." I had no choice but to go along. It wasn't exactly comfortable, especially given what happened earlier on in the day, but I tried to make the most of it. When people came over, they seemed so pleased with our sitting situation it was almost ridiculous.

How could it be that _all _these people were so excited about Jake and I dating. It's not like we were curing cancer, we were just two teenagers in a relationship. A fake relationship, but they didn't know that. The women would throw compliments my way, saying things about the dress I was wearing and the men would shake Jake's hand and tell him he was 'so lucky.'

It was all getting boring and I didn't know how much longer I could handle this.

"Did they tell people we're getting married or what?" Jake nodded towards our parents and I followed his gaze. Sure enough they all had smiles on their faces as they talked and looked out way. Even father was smiling as he spoke.

God, the world must be in some of kind of whirlwind today, the stars aligned for this moment in time.

"God, I hope not. Jake that wouldn't be good at all." I looked down at the ground, feeling a rather strong pang of guilt.

"I was kidding. I don't know what they're saying, but it's sure making them excited."

I turned to face him. "We need to talk about earlier Jake." I brought up today's earlier events out of the blue it seemed, but it had actually been on my mind all day.

This time he looked embarrassed. "I got a little carried away there didn't I?"

"Yes, yes you did."

"I'd say I'm sorry, but I'm really not. Seeing you play that guitar, combined with what you were wearing…I just uh, I needed to do it Liz. There no real reason other than the fact that I _wanted _you in that moment. I am sorry if I scared you or crossed and boundaries with you. I'd never want to make you feel uncomfortable around me. I consider you one of my good friends as of lately and I don't want to lose that."

Well, that was certainly easier than I thought.

"I…I consider you a good friend too Jake. So," I took a deep breath "I think we need to set up some boundaries or something."

"Like what?"

"I don't know." I admitted "maybe keep things to a minimum. You know only when we're in school or other public places, but when and if it's just us two….we can just be…friends?"

He pondered that for a minute. "I think I can live with that. If I ever overstep that feel free to slap me or something."

"What? I'm not going to hit you."

"Teasing babe," he laughed "I mean, unless you're into that." He sent me a wink, but I didn't really think that was funny. Hurting someone was no laughing matter, but of course he didn't know that.

We sat there for a few more minutes talking when something seemed to click in his mind.

"I don't know if I trust that look," I glanced at him warily.

His smile grew a bit wider. "This is a public place correct?"

"Um yes," I watched he reached over to take my hands and wrap them around his neck. "Jake what are you…"

"Keeping up appearances dear," he smiled warmly and brushed his lips against mine gently.

This kiss was the complete opposite of the one we shared in the room. It was softer, tamer. It seemed, if anything, to be a kiss between two friends if that made sense.

I inhaled deeply when he pulled away, resting my head against his shoulder.

"I do hope you enjoyed that." He whispered in my ear. Before I knew what I was doing, I nodded quickly.

"I did." I admitted softly.

Oh, God. What did that mean?

Of course the kiss had been nice, but it wasn't like the kisses I had shared with Jasper. They were both very different.

With Jake, it was like a comforting gesture.

A comforting gesture that I slowly found myself depending on these days.

But did it mean more than that to Jake? Did it mean more than that to _me_?

No, of course not! It couldn't, it just couldn't.

"Liz," I reluctantly came back to reality "are you alright?"

"Yes," I replied quickly, standing just as fast "I, um, I'll be back." I started walking away from the table towards the large estate. I needed a moment to get my head back on straight.

I made my way inside and found the bathroom for the guests. I stayed in there for a good five minutes or so, trying to calm down. I could feel my hands trembling slightly and I didn't know from what.

Everything had been alright, but the second the thought about Jake's kiss passed through my mind I seemed to be go into a whirlwind.

"He's a friend, that's all." I chastised myself for being so foolish. "You're lucky he's even helping you. Do _not _ruin this. The boys need you." I spend a few more minutes giving myself this pep talk before I felt well enough to venture back outside.

As I approached the door that would take me back outside, I felt something take hold of wrist and practically yank me away from prying eyes.

I tried to scream, but nothing came out.

I soon found out why.

"Do not," they whispered lowly in my ear "scream Liz."

When they removed their hand from my mouth, I took a deep breath and immediately recognized the scent. I knew it was him before I even turned around.

Turning, I looked up shyly to meet the burning gaze of Jasper.

I didn't speak, I could barely breathe as I watched him back me into a corner of a wall. It was dark, but I assumed we were in a closet amid the many hallways.

"I couldn't," he placed his hands on either side of my head "see him touch you like that anymore. I need you for myself…even if for a few minutes."

I nodded, biting my lip as I found my senses being overloaded by both his scent and mere presence.

My heart thumped against my chest rapidly and, almost as if he heard it, his lips twisted into a knowing smile.

"Just give me these few minutes?"

"Yes," three letters, but they meant so much more.

I would give him anything, if it meant he was happy.

If it meant _we _were happy.

* * *

**Well this chapter certainly went in all different directions.**

**Oh, Liz, your lines are being blurred my dear. **

**As always, I'd love to know what you thought!**

**By the way, you can take a look at the outfit Liz wore to the luncheon. The link's on the profile.**

**Song Liz played was 'We are Broken' by Paramore.  
**


	15. All I Believe In

**AN: To all my lovely reviewers, thank you so much! **

**As the creative process goes, things are heading for yet another twist if you will. So, to Lindsey, thank you for working with me when we were just talking nonsense on Twitter! We should really write a story together one day babe :)**

**All I own is Liz & my plot. Will gladly take Jasper though. **

**Enjoy.**

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**Chapter 15: All I Believe In**

**I may never ever rise above you**

**I may stumble as I lose my way**

**I may never find the words to tell you**

**Oh, believe me.**

**Oh my heart I want you to be strong**

**I need you to be all I believe in**

**Jasper**

Very few things in this life I am certain of.

I don't know when our father will hit us, bruising us for another few weeks nor do I know when all the hatred I have towards Jacob Black will disappear.

But at this very moment in time none of that fucking mattered.

Why, because I had _her _in my arms.

I had Liz, so nothing else mattered.

My decision to follow her seemed careless, but I was so glad I did it.

Otherwise this moment between the two of us probably wouldn't have happened.

I needed her, craved her more than anything I could possibly imagine.

And seeing his hands all over just about did me in.

Every touch drove me mad, but when he fucking kissed her right in front of me I knew I had to do something before I acted on impulse and caused us all unneeded trouble.

"Jasper," she whispered, snapping me back to reality, her hands coming to rest on my shoulders.

I knew then that she needed me as much as I needed her.

Nothing, no one mattered as I felt myself closing in her, the scent that was undeniably Liz surrounding me.

She gasped lightly as I practically attacked her, her lips perfectly moving against mine.

Pressing her tighter against the wall it was like she could feel every ounce of desire and longing I had for her, her hands moving up into my hair and pulling me down closer to her.

Tasting her I found myself wanting more.

My drug, I wasn't satisfied with just one hit.

Her grip tightened around me as my lips moved lower, skimming over her jaw and down towards her neck.

Once there, as always, I could feel myself losing control.

Just the mere thought of marking her as mine almost shattered what little self restraint I had when it came to her.

It would surely show Black who Liz wanted, who she desired.

But I didn't do it, I couldn't do it.

Not because I didn't want to, because God only knows I did, but because it would upset Liz. And _that _was enough to get me from doing it.

Just because I didn't mark her, it didn't mean I wasn't going to have some fun with her.

Lowering my arm, I grabbed her around the knee and hitched her leg over my own.

The closer proximity caused a breathy moan to pass her lips and I could no longer resist.

I pushed myself against her, my hips coming against hers. Her dress rose a few inches in doing so, revealing bruises and sexy as fuck legs.

"Oh god," she moved against me, arching her back off the wall "please Jasper."

"Please what?" I moved back up, nipping at her lower lip that taunted me every damn day.

"Just…please…" She was mumbling, incoherent words coming out of her mouth in short gasps.

Fuck this girl was going to be the death of me.

"Liz we can't." The words even shocked me.

Her eyes snapped open, her head lowering to meet my gaze.

They had darkened, lust swirling in them just and I'm more than certain the same emotion was reflected in mine.

"Again," she pouted, trapping her lower lip between her teeth "why not?"

I moved my free hand, brushing my thumb over her lips. "Don't give me the pout Liz, it's not going to happen."

"Well, why not?"

"Because I will not let your first time be in a fucking hallway closet. That's _not _what I have planned for you darlin'."

Her eyes widened, lips twisting into a tiny smile against my fingertip before I pulled away.

Southern endearments always worked her up.

"What do you have planned?"

"Well it sure as hell isn't this I can tell you that right now."

"When will I know?"

I couldn't help but smile at her persistence.

Liz could be very relentless when the time called for it. It was one of the many qualities that drove me crazy in my need for her.

"Oh," I leaned in resting my forehead against hers "you'll know. Did I not tell you?"

She nodded, a slight crimson staining her cheeks.

"Do we have to go back now?" She peered up at me through her lashes, smiling ruefully in doing so.

"Not yet," I untangled my hand from her leg to allow myself free reign to hold her to me "I just need a bit more time with you alone."

"Ok," she agreed instantly, wrapping her arms around my waist.

"I'm sorry you had to see us…"

I shrugged. "It's done. I'm trying really hard not to let it get to me. I'm having some difficulties though."

She didn't mention him for the next five minutes, the two of us relishing in this stolen moment, neither of us knowing when we'd get another one.

We silently pulled away at the same time, knowing that we had to be going back before came looking for us.

Well, before Jacob came looking for Liz.

That would be the last thing we fucking needed right now.

Though what I wouldn't give to see the look on his face.

He'd be fucking devastated that's for sure.

Liz stepped out first looking to see if there was anyone outside. As she did so I could help from letting my eyes roam down the back of her legs until I reached the white heels she was wearing.

Shit those were deadly, liable to bring any man to his knees.

"There's no one," she turned catching me in my obvious gawking, but when I threw her a playful smirk she knew I was only thinking good things about her.

We walked out together, heading back to this torture inducing luncheon.

As we did, I spotted Jacob talking with Edward.

Edward, of course, was fully invested in his conversation.

I had to hand to our brother. He sure knew when to step in when the time called for it.

"They seem to be getting along."

"Good for them." I gave her a knowing look, telling her that would never happen between me and him.

Their conversation quickly ended as soon we came into view.

"There you are," Jacob walked away from his conversation, patting Edward on the shoulder "I was beginning to worry about you."

Though there seemed to be a genuine look of concern in his eyes the protective and possessive side of me didn't care about any of that.

As soon as he was close enough I decided to fuck with his mind a little bit.

After all, he had been doing it all afternoon to me.

"She doesn't need you watching over her like a fucking guard dog." I glared at him, my voice low as I slipped my arm around Liz's shoulders.

His eyes narrowed and I could practically see the wheels turning in his mind.

He would never catch on though.

I may be possessive, but I wasn't stupid.

Fucker had no idea and he never would.

**Jake**

As soon as I saw Liz and Jasper walking back together I got this funny feeling as I watched them.

There was something about them. Well, about Jasper that I wasn't too sure about.

There seemed to be more to him than met the eye, but I couldn't put my finger on it.

When I approached them, he practically attacked me for merely being concerned about where Liz had gone.

With an arm wrapped around her shoulders, he was holding her tightly against his side.

But she didn't seem to mind it.

It was like she was used to it or something.

Which, that was a bit odd. Then again, some siblings were closer than others I guess.

Regardless I wasn't about to stand there and let him talk to me like that.

"What the hell is your problem?" I stepped closer, making sure that only we were the ones who heard this conversation.

He snickered. "You don't need to be all over her every five seconds. In fact you don't need to be around her at all. I'm very capable of taking care of my sister."

My eyes flickered down towards Liz, her eyes having nearly doubled in size as she looked at me nervously.

"What is that supposed to mean?" I wasn't stupid, but with Jasper I never knew what the hell he was talking about.

"Oh you know exactly what I'm talking about."

"Jasper," Liz cut him off, turning slightly in his grasp "don't do this."

His eyes narrowed, as if he was trying to figure her out.

"Please?" Her voice was soft, twisting out of his hold to grab his arm gently.

After that it was like I didn't even exist for a good two minutes.

It was like they were having a silent conversation with each other, their eyes solely focused on the other.

And then, as if nothing had happened just now between us, he stood a little taller and his facial expression changed from hatred to mere annoyance.

Without a word he walked away, stealing one last glance at Liz before rejoining Edward at the table.

I stood there, unable to process to what had just happened. How could it be that, with one simple touch, Liz was able to calm her brother down without so much as saying a word?

It was almost like Jasper didn't want to make her upset so he gave into her silent request almost immediately, the two of them lost in some sort of private moment.

Did that even make sense? Could siblings do that?

My questions went unanswered when I caught Liz's gaze once again.

She was standing there, hands twisted in front of her, looking at me with what almost resembled fear in her eyes.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm so sorry," her voice lowered "please don't be upset with me."

"Why would I be mad at you? Your brother's the one that was being a jackass."

"Jasper's just very protective."

"Yea, I'm beginning to see that. But there's no need for you to be upset. I was just worried about you."

"I didn't mean to worry you."

"So," I stepped in closer and placed my hands on her shoulders "did you get lost in there or something?"

A tiny smile graced her lips. "Yes. I tend to get very distracted."

Well that much I knew already. "You sure keep me on my toes you know that?"

She quirked an eyebrow, staring at me amused. "I do? Is that a good thing?"

The innocence Liz exuded was something I never got tired of. "Yea babe, it's a _very _good thing."

She seemed to pick up on something, a slight blush creeping up her cheeks.

God was there anything about this girl that wasn't becoming a weakness of mine?

_Keep your mind out of the gutter. You know she doesn't think of you in that way._

Yea, yea I knew that.

But damn it, it didn't hurt to daydream sometimes.

"Ready to go back," I nodded back towards the table "we still have another hour or so."

She pursed her lips, causing a slight flutter in the pit of my stomach. "Guess we don't have much of a choice do we?"

"We could always sneak off somewhere if you want?" I was only half joking with her this time, but she didn't catch on.

"Oh I wish, but they wouldn't allow it."

Did she really mean that? Would she really want to get away with me somewhere?

_Don't read too much into her comments. You know better._

Right, well it was worth a shot. "Alright then, let's get back."

We turned around, my hand easily finding hers as began walking back.

Just as got to the tables where everyone was at there was a sudden burst of commotion.

"Jake!" A voice called me from somewhere and I froze completely.

I knew that voice like the back of my hand.

How could I not?

It could only belong to one person.

And then I saw _her._

How the hell did she get there so fast? I had just been over there for God sakes!

Fuck, this was really bad timing.

**Liz**

I felt Jake stall just as we got to where everyone else was seated yet again, causing me to stumble a little bit.

"Jake what's wrong?" I tugged on his hand slightly when he didn't say anything. He was otherwise occupied.

Deciding to find out on my own, I followed his gaze, to see just what on Earth would cause him to go suddenly speechless.

It took all but five seconds to find out why.

Practically running, in five inch heels no less, was the epitome of perfection.

And she only had eyes for Jake.

Blonde hair flowing behind her, she held the biggest and brightest smile as she got closer.

"Shit," he mumbled under his breath right as miss perfection flung her arms tightly around his waist, my hand dropping from his.

I stepped away a few feet, taking in the scene in front of me.

After a moment his arms lifted and hesitantly embraced her back.

When he did I couldn't help but feel something strange in my stomach.

Something that was a bit unpleasant and made me feel like I was intruding on this private moment between the two of them.

My mind suddenly wanted to know who this girl was and why she was holding onto him so tightly.

She seemed so comfortable in his arms almost as if…oh, god.

Almost as if she loved him and vice versa.

I squeezed my eyes shut for a moment and tried to regain my breathing. I knew there was absolutely no reason for me to be upset over this. Jake and I were _not _really dating.

That small sliver of reason did nothing to help my nerves.

If it this true, then he had been lying to me this whole time.

He had agreed to date me when he had a girlfriend somewhere else?

I had never seen this girl at our school so she would've never known.

But why would he do this?

Opening my eyes, I found him staring right back at me.

I foolishly blinked back tears as I watched them, unable to look away for even a second.

"Liz it's not like that," he, almost as if he had been able to read my mind, pulled away from this girl and took a few steps away from her.

The girl wasn't fazed by it though. Instead she slipped her arm through his lightly.

"It's okay," I choked out, rubbing my eyes with the back of my hand "don't…just don't worry about it."

I backed away from him, wanting nothing more than to get away from it.

"Liz wait," he called after me, pausing to look down at the girl still glued to his side "Peyton move."

The girl, Peyton, looked up at him and knit her brows together. She was pissed off. It was written all over her face.

"Fine," she huffed and stepped away from him. She watched as Jake walked towards me, her eyes never leaving his back.

"You don't have to explain," I tried to save him the trouble "you know that."

"Yes I'm aware of that, but you're jumping to the wrong conclusions here." He seemed slightly irritated, but I wasn't sure at what or who.

"I think it's pretty obvious what this is." I peered behind him. "And honestly Jake, I don't know whether to be angry with you or myself."

"I'm not sure I'm following you."

"I know that I'm rather naïve, but I can't believe I was stupid enough to believe you'd help me without wanting something romantic in return….when you already had someone."

Before he could answer me another thought slammed into me.

"Oh God," I looked at him, feeling all the blood drain from my cheeks "you _kissed _me Jake," I whispered as lowly as I could.

Thinking he would grow upset with me I was more than stunned when I watched his lips twist slightly before he started laughing.

"Yea and I'd do it again." He winked and stepped in closer to me. "God Liz, you're such a girl."

"Excuse me? Why are you making jokes at a time like this?"

"A time like what," he came closer still "you didn't even let me say a word."

"Fine," I crossed my arms "explain to me."

"I, not now nor ever, have ever cheated on someone. And I'm not about to start now."

"Oh," I bit my lip "then who is she? And why did you look so shocked when you saw her?"

"Well, um, shit…" he rubbed the back of his neck, a sign that he was uncomfortable "Peyton and I have a bit of a past together."

I raised an eyebrow in question.

"Right, well she and I used to date back in LA. We've known each other forever, but we broke it off before I moved here."

"And you still love her?"

"I'll always love her Liz." He answered, eying me as if I should've known that. "Aren't you close with any of your former boyfriends?"

"Um, well you're technically the first boyfriend I've ever had. Real or not, you're still the first official one."

He seemed genuinely surprised by that bit of information.

"But believe me Liz, there's nothing going on between the two of us. I would never do something to hurt you girls. She's very important to me."

I felt a twinge of relief, but his words were well…they were just words. Though I knew he had no reason to lie to me, I wanted to know for sure.

"I see," I looked down "I'm sorry. I, uh, assumed too quickly."

"It's nothing. As long as everything's okay. Things are okay right?" He looked at me, those brown eyes nearly pleading with me.

I nodded my head. "Yea, Jake, things are okay." I knew the back of my mind that they weren't though. I had a feeling that things were about to get a hell of lot more complicated.

"You know," his arms were wound around me tightly before I could blink "you're very _sexy _when you're flustered."

I blushed lightly as he held me against him. "Shut up Jake. It's not funny."

He pulled away, his smile still in place. "Feisty too, well damn Liz you're just full of surprises."

I opened my mouth, but was caught off guard with the sudden reappearance of miss perfection.

"Jake are you going leave me standing around looking like an idiot, or you going to introduce me to your little friend over here?"

This girl, even though she was so small, looked intimidating as hell.

Actually she was more like intimidating beautiful, the complete opposite it seemed.

She seemed to have no problem speaking her mind. She was dressed in a way that I'm sure made all the boys stop and stare, and was stunningly gorgeous.

She was someone who I could never compete with.

She was someone who I could _never _be.

Her white strapless dress clung to every curve, exposing generous amounts of legs and arms. I wouldn't dare wear something like, especially if I was all bruised. Which, that was more often than not.

"Peyton," there was a playful warning in Jake's voice "play nice."

She snickered. "Aw Jake, you're no fun."

He shook his head. "Liz, this is Peyton. She and I've known each other forever."

"It's nice to meet you." I offered her the friendliest smile I could muster. If she was important to Jake then I didn't want to cause any trouble between the two of them.

When she didn't respond he continued. "And Peyton, this is Liz…my girlfriend."

I could see the look of shock flicker in her eyes for a second as she watched Jake slip his hand in to mine.

"You two," her cool demeanor cracked for a second "are dating?"

I didn't like the way she said it, as if it was some huge surprise that Jake would be dating a girl like me. I mean, yes, I wasn't beautiful likes she was, but I wasn't completely unfortunate looking.

"Yes, we're dating." For perhaps added affect I held onto Jake's hand a little tighter. Either that or I was terrified that she was going to try and hit me or something.

This girl screamed attitude and I had a feeling she wasn't my biggest fan at the moment.

"Oh, well, that's great Jake!" Her million watt smile was back in an instant. "I'm glad to see that you're happy. I do hope that you'll make time for me though. You know, now that I'm going to be living here too."

"What do you mean you're living here too?"

"Oh you know," she flipped her hair over her shoulder "daddy got transferred to a new law firm here, one that pays him so much more. Mom told him not to take it, but you know dad, always wanting the best for his girls."

As Peyton continued babbling to Jake I began to drift off and wonder if I could anyway ever be like her. If father wasn't this abusive dictator, but rather a doting and compassionate man would he make sure to give the three of us the best? Would we all be spoiled like this girl apparently was?

Everything, from the tip of her toes to her perfectly manicured fingernails, screamed money. Her entire outfit and jewelry had to be designer. I may not know a lot, but I was pretty well educated in the field of fashion.

Had I time and permission it would be a dream of mine to pursue a career in the field. That, of course, was a mere dream. All it probably would ever be.

"As soon as I heard we were moving up here all I could think about was seeing you again! I wanted to call you, but I figure surprising you would be even better!"

"Yea, well you certainly succeeded in that. Wait, then why are you here?"

"Jake," She playfully hit him "what you don't want to see me? Your dad invited us. He wanted daddy to meet some of his new co-workers. You know all those important men like to know each other, go out golfing…all that boring stuff. But I practically had to beg him to let me come. I just had to see you."

"Well even though it's a pretty big surprise, I'm happy that you're here Peyton. Who knows, maybe you and Liz will become great friends."

The two of us shot him a knowing glare.

He just laughed. "Um right, well are you going to be coming to school with us as well?"

The fact that Jake had referred to not only himself, but me as well did not go unnoticed by Peyton.

"No my dad made sure I was enrolled in the finest private, Catholic school this city had to offer. Nothing but the best remember? I was a bit surprised when your dad said you were going to public school. God, I miss seeing you in those white polo shirts. We were quite the couple back at La Salle weren't we?"

"That was never me Peyton, you know that."

She shrugged her shoulders. "Guess I'll have to see what Sacred Heart has in store for this girl."

I fought the urge to roll my eyes.

This was clearly a girl of a privilege, one who was used to the good life.

She undoubtedly always had everything handed to her on a silver platter, her father giving his little girl everything she could ever want.

She lived her life freely, the way she wanted to.

Regardless of all that, I was still envious of her.

The awkward conversation ended shortly after that, the three of us making our way back to the table finally.

Peyton went back to where her father was talking with Jake's and my own.

As she walked by I caught her throwing a second glance over at Jasper and Edward, a tiny smile on her lips as she looked them over.

While Edward merely shook his head and smiled back, obviously _not _interested in her, Jasper watched her for a second too longer than I was comfortable with.

"I don't think she likes me." Was the first thing that came out of my mouth as soon as we sat back down. Whether I meant to say that out loud or not, however, remained a mystery.

"That's just Peyton." Jake brushed it off as nothing. "She's just very blunt and straightforward about things. It doesn't mean she hates you. It's just…her attitude I guess."

"She reminds me of someone I knew when I was younger." I voiced my inner thoughts.

"Really," he seemed genuinely intrigued. "Who?"

I sat back and thought about it for a minute. I was so sure I knew a girl like Peyton growing up.

Beautiful and who said exactly what was on her mind. The confidence she exuded, not many people could pull that off. It was a gift. At least that's what someone once told me.

And then realization hit me, harder than I expected it to.

I looked down at my hands, shaking my head before looking back up at Jake. "She reminds me of my mother."

A look of understanding and sadness crossed his features, his hand coming out to take mine.

"Do you remember a lot about her?"

I shrugged. "Sometimes, but I was so young when she died."

"Tell me about her?" He silently assured me it was okay, rubbing his thumb over the back of my hand.

"She was beautiful, an amazing singer."

"Like you." he nudged me.

"She always wore red lipstick and had a very classic style about her. She had that New York attitude you know? She didn't take anything for anyone. She was strong, would do anything to protect the ones she loved. I don't remember a lot, I only spent five years of my life with her, but I know she's up there watching me."

"That doesn't sound like Peyton."

I looked over at him, tilting my head a bit. "Peyton's very confident, she carries herself well."

"Yea well, Peyton can also have a bit of a selfish streak in her. I mean she always means well and is a really good person at heart, but the woman you just described? She sounds more like you Liz. You're a selfless, beautiful girl who puts everyone before herself."

I had to look away from him, knowing that if he continued comparing me to my mother I was liable to breakdown again.

Not many people know about my real mother and so for Jake to tell me that I was like her, it was almost too much.

But there was only little fact that made me _unlike _my mother.

She would've never stood for this kind of treatment father bestowed upon us.

She would've left years ago, gotten away from everything.

I could never do that.

Our conversation flowed quietly and comfortably for another hour or so before it was eventually time for everyone to start going home.

I, more than anyone, was beyond thankful.

Today had been far much more than I had expected and all I wanted was to go back home and sleep, push the events and thoughts to the back of my mind.

I was good at that, it was my defense mechanism. Though what happened today with Jake wasn't terrible, it had caused an insane amount of confusion.

And confusion wasn't an emotion I was capable of dealing with right now.

Walking back to our cars, my parents and Jake's walked in back of us. And that made me slightly uncomfortable. I prayed that father wasn't staring at me the way he did when we were at home. Though I'm sure he'd never risk acting so carelessly in front of all these people.

"I had fun today Liz, I'm glad you were here with me."

I really wish I could've said the same to Jake, but the only thing I enjoyed about this luncheon was the fact that it was now over.

So instead I gave him a nod and told him I'd see him on Monday.

His goodbye was quick, chaste and I was silently thankful.

As I watched him walk to his car I caught this new girl doing the same, her eyes flickering back towards me for a moment.

And, if looks could kill, I would've been down on the pavement before she could blink those piercing eyes.

I turned quickly, getting into the safe confines of the car.

Only, even in the car, I knew I wasn't safe.

I was never safe and I don't know if I ever would be.

******

The ride home was practically silent. The only sound filling the car was the occasional questions and answers between my parents.

I found myself nodding off during the twenty five minute drive. I, at one point, found my head touching Jasper's shoulder for a split second.

I quickly sat up, rubbing the back of my neck when a sharp pain shot through me.

He eyed me funny, shaking his head.

I swallowed thickly, the momentary touch taking me back to that kiss we shared earlier.

Oh, to have only spent a few more minutes inside there with him.

With Jasper nothing else existed.

With him, every worry faded into the background.

I take it back.

When I was with him, I felt safe.

Then again, I also felt safe with Jake sometimes.

God, things were getting a bit complicated now weren't they?

Once we reached the house I slowly climbed out of the car, my legs sore from having worn heels all day.

Wanting nothing more than to just curl up under the blankets I attempted to make a fast getaway from father, but he was faster than I was.

"Eliza, come here young lady."

"Shit," I cursed, turning back to walk down the stairs. Edward and Jasper had been right behind me, curious looks on their faces as they remained on the steps.

I knew exactly what he was going to ask before he opened his mouth.

"Now, are you going to tell me what you know of this girl or am I going to have to force the information out of you."

Even though I knew what girl he was speaking of I decided to play coy.

"What girl father?"

A hand wrapped around my neck shot down every idea that I was strong in a second.

"Do _not _play stupid with me Eliza. Now, tell me."

I heard something coming from the direction from the stairs and I was glad Edward was there to stop Jasper from doing something.

"Peyton's an old friend of Jacob's. Their families know each other from before they moved here."

That answer didn't satisfy him. He wound some of my hair around his fingers and pulled it roughly. "And what else?"

"And," I winced when he tugged harder "and they used to date each other, but there's nothing between them anymore."

A cold, dark laugh passed his lips. "You better keep it that way Eliza."

"I'm sorry?"

"Do you know how close I am to getting that promotion Eliza? Your relationship with Jacob is doing wonders for my career and I will not let anything or anyone destroy that. Do you understand me?"

"But father, there's nothing…"

"I said," his voice grew louder "_nothing _will destroy this opportunity." He hissed and I nodded my head quickly, giving in to him.

After a minute he released me, his hand trailing slowly down my cheek. "Good, so see to it that you keep him happy Eliza. Do not let him leave you for this girl from his past. _You _are only one he is to have eyes for. So make sure it stays that way."

His hand came to rest right underneath my collarbone and I held my breath, praying to God that he wouldn't do anything.

After a moment, my unspoken prayer was answered and he moved away from me.

I exhaled sharply, practically running up the stairs for fear of father changing his mind.

For far too many years he had been looking at me in a way that wasn't appropriate and I knew it was only a matter of time before he tried something.

I just hoped it would never come down to that.

As I walked up the stairs as fast as I could I heard our parents having a rather heated conversation downstairs.

"You cannot look at my daughter like that Thomas, it terrifies her."

"I will look at her any way I please damn it! I pay for everything that little bitch has. This is my house and she will abide by my rules."

There was silence followed by a tiny whimper.

He had hit her again.

I squeezed my eyes shut as I reached the top of the stairs, a pair of arms wrapping around me a moment later.

Turning I buried my head in Jasper's chest, his arms wrapped around me as I felt fear coursing all through my body.

"Shh," He ran his hands softly through my hair "he will never fucking touch you like that again. I won't let him. I promise you that Liz."

The threat in his voice was real, his voice venomous as he spoke.

I nodded my head quickly, knowing that this moment between the two of us would be short lived being as we were in the middle of the hallway.

"He hit her," I choked "it's my fault."

Father didn't hit her as much as he verbally abused her, so it was always difficult to hear him hurt her physically.

"It's not and you know that."

"Please don't ever leave me," I clung to his shirt for a moment "please. Promise me?"

He pulled me away, his hands moving to cup my cheeks.

He pressed his lips to mine softly, but with a hint of desperation in them as well. It was like he was trying to ease his own fear and anger as well.

"You have my word." His words fanned across my face as he pulled away, tipping his head up to kiss my forehead.

As quickly as I had been wrapped in his arms, I was separated from him.

I missed his touch, missed the feeling of safety he gave me whenever he was close to me.

"Sleep Liz, you need it."

I nodded weakly, walking slowly towards my bedroom.

I shut the door behind me, but knew that would do little to protect me from anything. I had no lock, so anyone could come in at any moment.

I fumbled my way around my darkened bedroom, slipping out of my dress and putting on my shorts and a thin top.

Crawling in bed, I pulled my knees up to my chest and closed my eyes, hoping to God that this would all go away.

I hated father even more at this very moment. He had crossed a line, his intentions clear in his dark eyes as they lingered on every inch of exposed skin.

I felt sick.

I felt that with each passing moment I was being pushed to my limits, pushed until I either died or snapped from pain and anger.

I didn't want to live a life like this, but damn it what else could I do?

As I fell in to a restless sleep I thought of Jasper and eventually Jake.

Jasper knew everything. He lived it every single day with me.

Jake had no idea and I would make sure it stayed that way. He could _never _know this part of my life; know the cruel and vile things my father did to us.

Jasper was my safety, my only haven in this world of hurt.

Jake was my comfort, the only normal thing I had in my life.

They were both important to me, my life savers in their own ways.

Just how I couldn't let Jasper or Edward down, I was beginning to realize that I didn't want to disappoint Jake either. I wanted…no, I _needed _this relationship to go on long enough for me to figure out what the hell I was going to do.

I needed a solution, I needed absolution.

And damn it, I was going to find it.

* * *

**Tell me lovers, what did you think? This new addition, this girl from Jake's past, won't be going away for awhile. **

**It honestly broke my heart to write the last part of this chapter. **

**Your reviews & feedback are always so greatly appreciated!**

**Also, if any of you lovely readers are interested, there's a new story posted. It's called 'Midnight Suicide' and I'd love for you to check it out!  
**


	16. What You Do To Me

**AN: Thank you to my reviewers from last chapter, I appreciated every single one of them as always! You all had so many different ideas and theories when it came to Peyton. She's a rather complicated character in her own right.  
**

**This chapter is for my friend Lindsey, in hopes of making her smile. Love you BB! **

**As always all I own in Liz...and most of Peyton. **

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**Chapter 16: What you do to me**

**I want to be the picture on your wall  
I want to chase you around until we fall  
I want to be the one you write about  
I want to be the one who never lets you down  
But right now I feel like I'm  
Losing control**

**Liz**

Spring was officially in bloom and for once the light atmosphere seemed to be reflected in our household as well.

The abuse has lessened since the luncheon even more and I, along with my brothers and mother, couldn't have been more grateful for it.

Though I was extremely thankful I knew that the only reason father hadn't been hurting us as often was because he had been completely swamped with work and he was bringing home files almost every night.

Father would only show his face during the dinner, disappearing into his study until the late hours of the night. In truth the only times I saw him for more than a few minutes was in the morning and for dinner.

Dinnertime I could handle, but it was the morning encounters that made me feel uneasy.

After all that happened that night in the living room, father's hands lingering on my skin for much too long, I was petrified of him doing something when it was just the two of us.

I practically held my breath every morning as I cooked him breakfast. I tried to move quickly in hopes of him not staring at me when I wasn't looking. I tried to cover up more, but I was at a rather large disadvantage. When all I was allowed to wear were those damn shorts my only option was to wear shirts that were slightly longer.

Even then it wasn't easy. My legs were still exposed for the world to see.

Only it wasn't the world who was allowed to see them. No, that 'privilege' belonged to father and to him alone.

It was sick the way he looked at me, but even more so now that he wasn't being so discreet about it.

As calm as I tried to remain on the outside I could almost feel myself trembling in fear.

If only I had Jasper with me in the mornings I would feel much safer. Hell I'd feel safer with Edward too.

My brothers, they would do anything to protect me.

I promised to do the same long ago. Though I was smaller than them, more naïve, I would do whatever it took.

******

It was the beginning of May, which meant we had exactly five weeks until we were done with school. While everyone was beyond excited I couldn't help but feel a sense of dread.

Who knows what father would make us do this summer. Since we weren't allowed to have a job, he would probably make us enroll in some type of class to fill our time with something creative.

I tried not to think about though. I had far much more important things on my mind to deal with at the moment.

Things between Jake and I had been mostly good. Well they were good until he would start talking about his friend, the girl who had suddenly popped back into his life once more.

Though I harbored no hard feelings against Peyton, father's nagging voice in the back of my mind always made me force myself to get Jake to change the subject. Though our relationship was fake I knew that he wouldn't break the trust we had for one another.

Jake wasn't that kind of guy, as he constantly was reminding me of.

But I knew that Peyton and I were going to be running into each other very soon.

This weekend in fact.

It was Jake's birthday tomorrow, Saturday, and as his girlfriend I didn't have much of a choice. I _had _to be there.

Even father made it a point that all three of us were to attend said party. While Edward seemed somewhat excited, Jasper was not happy in the slightest.

I couldn't blame him. It had been hard enough at that luncheon, but now he was going to have to see us together all over again. In front of our classmates, I'm sure that the affection level between Jake and I would be increased tremendously.

But that was tomorrow. I was more concerned with the right now.

Why? It was simple really. The three of us had the entire house to ourselves for the next couple hours and, since Edward was upstairs immersed in his writing, Jasper and I had the living room all to ourselves.

We had been sitting together on the sofa for the past hour talking about anything and everything. I had always loved the fact that I could talk to him about any little thing that was going on.

I didn't have to hide, didn't have to plaster a fake smile when I was with Jasper.

He knew me better than anyone else and his mere presence had a rather calming effect on me, always has.

With my legs curled underneath me, I leaned against the couch while my hand silently found Jasper's and quickly intertwined them.

His hand, as always, fit perfectly in mine and the two of us sat there for a good ten minutes without saying a single word. There were no words needed during these moments. Our ability to converse without speaking was a bond I only shared with him, a connection I knew I'd probably never find again.

Hands still clasped Jasper brought them higher, kissing my knuckles before turning it so my palm was face up.

I knew what he was going to do before he did it, but nothing could ever prepare me for the multitude of sensations that surged through my body when he pressed his lips against my scar.

Softly at first, my eyes slid closed the second I felt his tongue dart out for only the briefest of moments to trace the curve of my scarred skin.

And then, as quickly as it happened, it was all over.

My eyes snapped open quickly, wondering just what in world was going to happen next.

"This scar," his fingertips replaced his mouth "will be the fucking death of me."

I felt myself blush. No one had ever talked about my scars that way. Could it be that Jasper really found them…sexy?

I know I was completely fascinated by the one he had above his eye. It was the epitome of sexy, something that I'm sure most girls couldn't resist.

I was so consumed in my thoughts that I barely registered the fact that he was pulling me off the couch until I was already on my feet.

"Where…" My question trailed off when we sat back down a moment later.

"I have to show you something." He sat beside me on the piano bench, giving my hand a quick squeeze before placing his hands on the keys.

I sat beside him as closely as possible, but making sure he had enough room to play.

As soon as the unfamiliar melody began filling the room my eyes widened at the realization.

"You…you've been writing again?" I did a double take of him. Jasper hadn't composed something in…well, in a long time.

He nodded quickly, my favorite smirk in place. "I wrote it last week, after the luncheon?"

"Oh," I listened more closely, the melody going from innocent to sensual before returning to innocent. "It's beautiful."

"It's you. It's what you do to me Liz." His hands paused on the keys. "You're my fucking muse." I swallowed thickly, words absolutely failing me as I felt my heart swell with yet another foreign feeling.

I tried to push that feeling to the back of my mind and remained focus on the sounds that he was creating.

Jasper played the piano effortlessly, like he had never stopped playing. In fact he hadn't played in a little over a year. He was talented, there was no denying that.

Sitting beside him I leaned my head on his shoulder while the simple melody he was playing surrounded me, my eyes becoming fixated on the way his fingers moved across the keys.

I was entranced; especially thinking about the way his hands touched me in almost the exact same way. He was delicate, but at the same time held a lot of passion in his eyes as he played.

I found myself getting maybe a bit too lost in those memories because I soon was feeling the all too familiar pressure between my legs. Biting my lip, I tried to discreetly cross them and attempt to stop this building tension.

I failed miserably.

Not a second after I did that did Jasper's hands completely stop, one of them moving and resting on my knee. I inhaled deeply when he started moving his hand higher up my leg.

Turning his head slightly, he whispered in my ear. "Let me help you."

Nodding slowly, I uncrossed my legs and allowed his hand to slide over my thigh.

His hands were always heaven against my bare skin. They always calmed and excited with just one simple little touch.

Running his fingertips alongside my leg, he barely brushed against the hem of my underwear. I tried to move myself closer to him, but he stopped me.

"Patience Liz," He kissed me behind my ear and I let out a shuddered breath. He never failed to get me worked up so quickly. "We have to be quiet."

Creeping up higher, he was nearly touching me in the place I needed it most when the doorbell rang. Neither of us moved though and I desperately tried to block out the noise.

Whoever it was didn't stop though.

"Fuck," Jasper muttered, his hand moving away from me reluctantly. I exhaled, lowering my head a little as I tried to control my breathing.

Turning, I watched as he stood up and walked over to the door and opened it. After a second, he spoke. "What the hell do you want?"

"Is Liz home?" I sat up quickly at the mention of my name. I knew right away that it was Jake. Checking the time I couldn't figure out why he was here right now though I wasn't exactly sure.

"Liz," Jasper swung the door open fully "you have a visitor." He didn't look pleased in the slightest that it was Jacob who had disrupted this little moment between us. Getting up, I crossed the living room as Jasper left the room quickly, making his way towards the kitchen.

"What are you doing here Jake?" Giving him the standard greeting of a hug and kiss on the cheek, I stood in front of him while I waited.

"Here," He handed me a bag, a sly smile on his face. "I bought you something."

Openly the bag hesitantly I peered in quickly before looking at him. "What is this?"

"It's for my party."

"You want me to wear _this _to your party?"

"It's a costume party remember?"

"Oh." I felt like a fool as I tried to think of when he had told me this. I came up short, but didn't tell him that. Instead of I made an even bigger fool of myself. "I've never been to a costume party."

Hell, as kids, we weren't even allowed to dress up for Halloween. I could faintly remember when Edward and I were younger we would dress up, but those were days long gone by.

They were distant memories I'd never be able to relive. Until now that is I guess.

He didn't seem surprised. "I hope you don't mind, but when I saw this I thought about you and knew I needed to get it for you."

Lifting an eyebrow, I looked inside the bag again. "_This _reminded you of _me?"_ It didn't make any sense. "Jake…I uh, I don't dress like this."

His smile grew a little wider. "I know babe, but think about how sexy you'll look." I blushed. He was really too much sometimes. "Besides that's the point of dressing up right? It allows you a night to be your complete opposite."

I nodded quickly. I hadn't really thought of it that way. "Um, well thanks?"

I didn't know what to think of this outfit. I wasn't even sure if I would be able to wear it. I had a few lingering bruises so I would have to make sure none of them would be exposed in this costume.

"Come one Liz," he stepped in closer "you know I think you're beautiful, why not have a little bit of fun? Besides, everyone knows that my girlfriend has to be the sexiest girl there."

"I don't know about that." I gave him a knowing look and he knew I was talking about Peyton. That girl screamed sex appeal. Surely all the boys would be looking at her tomorrow. Which, I suppose that would be a good thing.

I didn't want any extra attention on me.

I knew I couldn't exactly deny him. No matter how much I was dreading wearing this. Nodding, he leaned down and kissed my forehead.

"I also came by to see if you would mind coming over tomorrow to help me before the party?"

"Of course not," It was job after all, the duty of a good girlfriend I suppose.

"Perfect. Well I'll come by around two or so. That'll give us enough time to get ready."

After a few more minutes of talking he eventually left, leaving me standing in the living room with the bag still in my hands.

Blowing some hair out of my face I turned around, gasping when I saw Jasper and Edward standing at the bottom of the stairs.

"What's in the bag?" Edward came to me, a hint of excitement in his eyes. Before I could tell him he took the bag and opened it to see for himself.

"Well hot damn Liz," He let out a low whistle, embarrassing me even further "Jacob sure wants you to look sexy as hell tomorrow."

"Give me that," I snatched it out of his hands, a slight pout on his face "I don't even know if I can wear this. Who knows what'll reveal."

"Try it on." Jasper joined the conversation, his eyes never leaving mine. "I want to see what it looks like before he does."

Well, way to be discreet. Again, not being able to deny Jasper much I made my way into the downstairs bathroom and pulled everything out of the bag. I came to find a dark blue, nearly black, dress along with a pair of insanely tall high heels.

Much to my surprise everything fit perfectly. I guess Jake knew me better than I thought. I did a spin in the mirror and was partly relieved that no bruises or old marks were revealed.

I stepped out, twirling a lock of hair around my finger nervously as I gauged their reactions.

"_That_ is what he wants you to wear?" The anger and disbelief was evident in Jasper's voice as he stepped closer to get a better look at me.

"Do I look stupid?" I peered around him, silently asking Edward for his opinion.

He shook his head. "Absolutely not, I can see why he would pick this out for you."

Jasper and I glared at him. "You do?"

"You _do _have that pin-up girl look about you Liz. You're innocent with maybe a little sex kitten lurking underneath."

My eyes doubled in size. "I am no such thing."

"Well, he sure doesn't think so. It doesn't matter as long as you look good and nothing is revealed that would cause any more drama, I think you're going to be a hit Liz." Edward gave his final word and began walking towards the stairs. "It makes your legs look great by the way."

I playfully smacked his shoulder as he retreated back to his room, a soft chuckle coming from him along the way.

Leaving Jasper and I alone in the room again I bit my lip as I waited for him to say something.

Instead he chose to close in on me, his hands rubbing my bare arms before moving one of them behind my neck.

"Remind me to think Jacob." He snickered, eyes roaming up and down my body.

"Come again?"

"You have no idea how fucking tempting you look in that dress Liz. And those shoes, Jesus fucking Christ, I'm about two seconds away from wanting to fuck you senseless."

I met his gaze quickly. Was he trying to imply that we…

He shook his head, stopping my inner thoughts, and stepped forward to place a chaste kiss on my lips. "I'll have to keep a watchful eye on you tomorrow little girl."

Watching him walk away I felt my head spinning.

If Jasper was going to be keeping an 'eye' on me tomorrow, God only knows what that meant.

Between Jasper and Jake, I was beginning to think that this party was going to interesting.

I just hoped I'd be able to keep my emotions and hormones at bay.

******

The following morning found me feeling both nervous and somewhat excited. Even though a part of me worried that something would happen when it came to the two boys in my life, there was another part of me that couldn't help but feel eager for this party.

Having never been to something like this before I spent all morning thinking about what it was going to be like. Jake had mentioned that many people from school would be there.

I was almost thankful for being in this fake relationship. Though it was sometimes difficult there were some benefits to it. With Jake I was able to do normal things kids our age were supposed to be doing.

If only for a few hours, I was glad that I would be able to share in this experience with both Jasper and Edward.

Jake had said something about James being one of those people coming to the party and I just knew that Edward would be beyond thrilled to see him there. Their friendship had progressed somewhat and for that I was glad. Maybe they would be able to get to know each other better tonight.

After all Edward deserved happiness as much as anyone if not more.

I dressed casually in a pair of jeans and a black long-sleeve shirt. Since I would be helping him I packed my costume as well as his birthday present in a tote bag just as the doorbell rang.

Saying a quick goodbye to my brothers and my mom, I opened the door and stepped outside to greet Jake.

When I did, however, I couldn't help but feel self conscious at the way he was looking at me.

"What is it? Is there something wrong?" I did a mental check in my head, making sure everything was covered. "Jake?"

**Jake**

I snapped out of lust-filled gaze when I heard Liz call me again.

Shit I was such an idiot sometimes, but dear God even dressed in something simple she quite possibly took my breath away.

"Sorry," I shook my head, giving her a hug "my mind's all over the place today."

She nodded. "That makes two of us."

I opened the door for her, the two of us falling into a comfortable silence as we drove to my house. I was pretty nervous actually. She had never been to my house before for one and number two, Peyton had decided to show up earlier, claiming she wanted to help me.

I couldn't deny Peyton. She was one of my oldest friends and knew in her own way she was just trying to help, but I also knew she had ulterior motives.

That girl had always had a possessive streak in her and I knew that her seeing me with another girl drove her crazy. I felt bad of course, but Peyton's feelings had always run deeper than mine for her.

I loved her of course, but not in the way she deserved and wanted.

We pulled up to the house and I gauged Liz's reaction as she took in the house.

It was bigger than hers, but not by a lot. If anything we had more landscape and yard space.

She took in everything as we walked inside, her eyes widening for a second as she took in all the interior design.

"Oh wow," she breathed out "you're house is beautiful. I'm guessing your mother has a knack for design?"

"She does some work on the side, always remolding someone's room or house."

"She's very talented. I love it." She set down her bag in the corner in the living room. "So, what do you need help with?"

Well she sure didn't waste any time.

"Jake!" A voice cut me off, Peyton bouncing into the living room a second later. "Oh," her smile faltered for a second when she saw Liz. "Hi."

"Hi Peyton, how are you?"

She shrugged. "Fine thanks."

The tension between those girls was thick and this was only the second time they had been in the same room with each other. I could only imagine what was going to happen at the party later.

I quickly sent Peyton off to do something else in the living room while Liz and I moved into the dining room.

There were a few paintings my mom had that I wanted to swap and call me selfish, but I wanted Liz to be the one to help me.

I watched as she looked at the painting on the table, a picture of Los Angeles staring back at her. Something peculiar crossed her features the longer she looked at it.

"Do you like it?"

She nodded. "It's incredible."

"Good," I handed the painting to her "come on." I held my hand out for her to take, nodding for her to get on my shoulders.

"What are you doing?" She eyed with me hesitation.

I shook my head, smirking. "You said you were going to help, right?"

"And getting up on your shoulders would be considered me helping how?"

"Neither of us can reach that," I pointed to a spot on the wall "but if you're on my shoulders you should be able to reach it."

"Are you sure?" She looked between me and the spot on the wall. "It's pretty high."

"Are you afraid of heights or something?"

Her silence was my confirmation. "Liz," I stepped closer "I would _never _let you fall. Now come on." I moved again, crouching slightly so we could do this.

After a moment she took those few timid steps towards me, placing her hand in mine as I helped her up on my shoulders.

She inhaled sharply when I stood. My hands came to rest on her legs, between her ankles and knees.

"Here?" She held the picture in her hand, aiming towards where there was already a nail hanging.

"Yes," I edged closer to the wall so she wouldn't have to stretch so far.

She hung the photo up with ease, my hands keeping a firm lock on her so she wouldn't fall down. Granted I overdid the precautions just a little bit, but it wasn't very often that I had the opportunity to have a beautiful girl on my shoulders.

Liz was just about done when a small noise coming from the area of the living room startled for me just the briefest of seconds, but that was long enough for me to sway a few inches to the left.

In doing so I could hear a small thump from somewhere above me.

"Shit," I heard Liz hiss "shit that hurt."

Remembering that there was a light fixture right next to her I quickly brought her down off my shoulders, my eyes meeting hers.

She stared at me, a painful expression written all over her face.

"Oh God I'm so sorry," I cringed as I caught sight of the tiny cut above her eye "fuck, I'm such an idiot."

Before she could open her mouth I was taking her by the hand, literally tugging her into the kitchen.

"Sit," I released her hand, waving towards the counter. Why I didn't direct her towards the table was beyond me, but I didn't have time to think about it.

I quickly grabbed a pack of frozen vegetables out of the freezer, feeling utterly embarrassed that I was about to press a pack of frozen peas on her face.

It was all we had though.

She was up on the counter by the time I got back to her.

"Is it that bad?" She went to touch it, but I grabbed her hand to stop her.

"Don't," I kept her hand in mine while the other placed the ice against the cut. She jerked away from me when the cold met her warm skin, but she eventually eased into it.

"I'm really sorry. I feel like I such a jackass. I should've been more careful."

She shrugged. "It's okay. Things happen."

I didn't like the way she brushed it off as if it was nothing. I had hurt her. Unintentionally of course, but that wasn't the point.

"It'll probably be a bruise tomorrow." I pulled the ice away and got a closer look at it.

"What!" She backed away from me. "No, no Jake. A bruise isn't good!" She shook her head, searching around for something to see her reflection.

She found nothing of course. We didn't have mirrors lying around the kitchen.

I knew that some girls could be rather vain when it came to their appearance, but I didn't peg Liz to be one of those girls at all.

"I'm sure no one will notice." I tried to placate her regardless.

"You sure," She reached up and touched the side of her head "it's not too noticeable?"

I removed her hand, brushing my fingertips over the cut and leaned in. "You're still perfect." The words were suddenly low, the desire in my voice thick.

If she noticed it she sure did a good job at hiding it.

My close proximity put me in a position where my lips were hovering only a few inches above hers.

"I'm not perfect Jake." She looked down and away.

Damn it why was she always doing this to herself? She was always putting herself down.

Did this girl not see what I, and I'm sure everyone else, saw?

She was perfect, a girl that any guy would kill to be with.

"I'm not letting you win this battle." I could my feel my hand that, up until now had been firmly on top of hers, move a couple inches until it was resting on her hip gently.

"Jake," her eyes flickered down towards my hand "please…don't do this." I could hear the sadness in her voice, a sadness that shouldn't be there.

"Why not," I stood there, her legs on either side of my waist, and awaited her reaction. "Why won't you let me show you how perfect you are?"

"Because you can't," her words were rushed, guilt flashing in her eyes when she took in my expression "you just can't do that Jake. It's better this way."

Well who the hell was she trying to fool, me or herself?

"I don't think you really believe that." I felt myself leaning back down towards her, my lips barely grazing over hers when I heard that damn noise again.

This time, though, they made their presence known in the kitchen.

Clearing her throat, Liz jerked her head to the side when she heard Peyton, a deep blush creeping up her cheeks. Fuck, that blush was hot.

"Jake what did you do?" Peyton stepped further into the kitchen, a smirk on her face. "You know, you really shouldn't smack your girl around. Some girls don't like that." She winked at me.

"He didn't," Liz looked at her in disbelief. "Jake would never hurt me. I hit my head."

That sadness from a few moments ago was in her voice again and it took all I had to not hold her against me, showing her that there was no reason for her to be so upset.

"Well good," Peyton continued with her sarcasm. "Look Jake, I think Liz and I should go get ready for this party of yours. Contrary to belief we _do _have to spend time getting beautiful."

Not when it came to Liz. She was already perfect.

I glanced back over at Liz and raised an eyebrow, asking if she'd be alright going with Peyton and spending the next hour or so with her.

"Sure, yea okay." She nodded and I pulled back from her so she could hop off the counter.

Watching Peyton and Liz walk away was rather difficult. I didn't want Liz to be away from me for so long. I had invited her over for the mere thought of being able to spend more time with her.

Guess I'd have to wait until the party to spend more time with her.

God I really hope Peyton didn't start anything. The last thing I needed was her causing a scene on this already thin tempered situation.

**Liz**

I followed Peyton back into the living room, grabbing my bag before we started walking upstairs. I could only assume that she knew where she was going.

After a few moments we found ourselves in what looked like a guest bedroom.

"Now Liz," Peyton turned to face me "you look like one of those girls who don't know much about personal style."

"Excuse me?" Who did she think was?

She waved her hand at me. "You know what I mean. You have so much damn natural beauty so I'm guessing you don't wear a lot of make-up, if any?"

"No," I shook my head "I don't."

"That's what I thought. Well, if we can't have Jake's date looking like a hot mess so come on. I'm going to help you."

She waved me over towards the bathroom where she had the entire counter covered with hair products and make-up. "Now, what are you dressing up as?"

"A pin-up girl," I walked inside further and let my eyes take in everything. Clearly this girl had a lot of money if she had so many different products."

"So I think we should curl your hair and I know just how to do your make-up. Sit down," She pointed towards the toilet and I silently listened to her.

Though I didn't exactly like her bossing me around I didn't want to cause any more strain between the two of us.

She plugged in the curling iron and began doing who knows what to my hair.

"So how long have you and Jake been dating?" She began what seemed like a normal conversation, but I knew better.

"For about a month and a half," I cringed when she pulled one strand of hair too tight around the curling iron.

"He's great isn't he? We dated for almost two years." I suppose that was her trying to one up me. It wasn't really working.

"Yea, he's great." That was truth. He was quickly becoming one of my only friends other than my brothers.

"The sex is great too isn't it?"

I did a double take of her. "Um…well I wouldn't know."

"What?" She seemed genuinely shocked. "Wow, I for sure thought Jake would've persuaded you to have sex already. He can be pretty persuasive."

"Jake's never forced me to do anything I haven't wanted to." Though, over the past few weeks, I was beginning to see that lines were being blurred between the two of us.

"I still can't believe he's dating someone like you. I mean, no offense, but you're so quiet and shy. Jake usually goes for the spunky and lively girls." She pondered that for a second. "Or I guess he wanted to date someone who was the opposite of me." She laughed, continuing to curl my hair.

"I don't know, he never mentioned you before." I knew that was a low blow, but she wasn't exactly playing fair here.

"He probably didn't want you to feel threatened. I come across that way sometimes."

"Maybe, all I know about him is what he tells me. And from what I know, he's a truly amazing person and I'm very fortunate to have him in my life."

She paused, her eyes flickering down towards me. "I can't argue with you there."

I felt a bit of satisfaction that I had gotten her to get off my back somewhat.

"Can I ask you something?"

I nodded, trying not to move so much so she wouldn't burn me.

"Those two boys with you at that lunch thing," She hedged.

"What about them?" I didn't like where she was going with this.

She bit her lip, actually looking a little nervous. "Are they single?"

"Why?" I couldn't answer that question for her.

She nodded her head. "I was just curious. They're very attractive aren't they?"

Was that a trick question? "Um, well they're my brothers so…" I hoped she'd get the point.

"Oh, right. Are they coming tonight?"

"Yes they'll be here."

"Oh good," She smiled "then I'll make sure to look really good. Got to make a good impression right?"

A good impression for what, there was no way my brothers would take interest in Peyton. I mean, Edward didn't like girls and Jasper…well she sure as hell couldn't have Jasper.

I didn't disclose any of that information with her though.

Once she was done curling my hair, the soft waves falling down my back, it was time for her to do my make-up. I made it a point to tell her that I didn't want too much.

The outfit was already too much and I didn't need anything else to the mix.

As she touched up everything she rambled on about random things, but I still couldn't get past what she had said about my brothers.

Of course they were good looking, but that didn't mean I wanted this girl to go after them.

She herself had just basically told me that she was very much still in love with Jake.

What interest could my brothers be to her if she was hung up on Jake?

Unless…unless she was playing on using one of them to try and instigate a jealous tirade.

God I really hope that wasn't the case.

Peyton getting involved anymore than she already was would not be good on so many levels and I don't honestly think I could compete with someone like her.

If she was trying to get to Jake by using Jasper then there was going to be some serious problems and I wouldn't be able to stay quiet.

"And you're all done!" She smiled at me, but something inside of me didn't trust that smile. "Come on, let's finish getting ready."

I nodded. I was more than ready than trying to keep this girl from throwing herself at Jasper. I wouldn't let her use him.

There was no way.

I had a feeling this party was going be one major night of stress and high strung emotions.

I just hoped I'd be able to handle it all.

I _had _to stay in control and not let everything fall apart.

No matter what it took, I'd stay strong. We had too much riding on this and I wasn't about to let Jake's former flame ruin everything.

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**I'd really love to know what you all thought! A Jasper & Jake moment with Liz and someone's starting to feel threatened maybe? Oh, never ending supply of drama.  
**

** Next up: The party as well as Jasper & Jake POV. **


	17. Center of Attention

**AN: Thank you to my wonderful reviewers. I apologize for the wait & not being able to respond to you all like I normally would, but real life and I haven't been getting along as of lately. **

**Anyways, I hope you all enjoy this next chapter!  
**

**Liz & my plot belong to me, nothing else. **

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**Center of Attention:**

**The party's over  
I didn't think you'd make it through the night  
Everybody's gone but you're alright  
Sweetie now obviously  
You know it's not obvious to me  
But it's not plain enough to see**

**You're falling baby  
I've been waiting  
You took the long way home  
In that dress, it makes me crazy  
I'm not the only one  
It's cold outside  
Keep your heart open wide  
Save it for somebody who cares  
Somebody who cares**

**Jasper**

It took Edward nearly an hour and a half to convince me to go to the fucking party. I tried everything I could to get out of it, but my brother somehow talked me into it.

I had to hand it to him, my brother was one relentless little fucker when he wanted to be. And I loved him all the more for it.

After trying to the play the 'father won't be here so how would he know' card, that's when he must've got fed up with me and started hitting me where it hurt.

He started bringing up Liz.

"Come on Jazz, you know it'll hurt her if you don't go."

That did me in.

The mere thought of her upset over something trivial like my appearance at this damn party was enough to get my priorities back in order.

I wouldn't hurt her by being a complete jackass and not going, but I also wouldn't sit around and watch her be shown off like some trophy wife.

We all knew Liz was beautiful and I didn't believe for a second that Jacob wasn't aware of it. Liz had him wrapped her little finger and didn't even know it.

I didn't know which was worse, the fact that he was becoming so enamored with her or the fact that she was completely oblivious to everything around her.

Well, she technically wasn't oblivious to things between the two of us. Innocent as she may be I knew she was waiting for me to tell her yes, to take her like I've wanted to for quite some time now.

I wasn't sure what was holding me back. I had every right to be with her, to show her how good I could make her feel on such an intimate level, but something always pulled me back at the last minute.

It wasn't about her not being ready because God only knows she was, but I couldn't exactly put my finger on it.

Whatever the case was, I wasn't going to bit my tongue is Black took things too far tonight. I don't care if it was his house.

She was _my _Liz and if he so much as laid a hand on her the wrong way or kissed her too fucking long I would step in and get her away from him.

Call me a selfish bastard, but I didn't give a shit.

After my little fit the two of us eventually made it out to the car, Edward holding a piece of paper in his hand tightly.

"Why do you look so nervous?" I glanced at him, plucking the paper from his fingers so I could figure out where the hell this place was.

"Someone might be at this party, Jazz." He ran a hand through his hair, a nervous habit he had picked up over the years.

"And just who might that someone be?" Though I had a fairly good enough idea, I just wanted to mess with him for a minute.

"You know who," he groaned, turning to me with a helpless look.

"Well," I smirked "if you want to start something with this James guy, then you got to start saying his name dear brother."

"Start something? Jasper I…no, it's not like that. We're just friends."

"Yea, but you sure what a hell of lot more than friendship don't you?"

"It doesn't matter, it'll never happen."

"Oh, bullshit Edward," I waved a hand at him. "You can't lie to me. I know you a lot better than you think."

I could've sworn to God that he blushed over the mere thought.

"I just want to have a good time tonight." He changed the subject on me. "And if James is there then I think….well I don't know…should I do something?"

"Well, fuck, Edward I don't know. This isn't exactly my area of expertise."

"But you've dated and you've been on the chase before."

No, that wasn't exactly true. The only girl I've ever really thought about chasing was Liz, but I didn't seem to be doing that great of a job these days.

I never expected the chase to be so fucking complicated.

"You just got to do what your heart tells you to do."

To that he laughed at me, fucking laughed! "When did you get so soft Jazz?"

"Shut up Edward. I know it sounds like a damn cliché, but it's the truth. It's what I would do. It's what I'm…well never mind that."

"Yea," He nodded, knowing regardless. "I know Jasper. I know it isn't hard, but one of these days she'll be all yours."

And what a sweet fucking day that'll be.

We drove the rest of the way in silence, Edward's mind undoubtedly on James and mine on Liz. By the time we arrived at Jacob's house there was a good amount of people already at the massive house.

"Shall we get this over with?" I watched a group of girls walked by, the lot of them wearing skimpy costumes.

"We should've dressed up. It _is _a theme party after all." Edward watched, but with not fascination what so ever.

"Yea fucking right, let's go." I got out the car, Edward following suit and falling in line with me as we walked up to the front door.

I had been to a few parties throughout high school, but they had never been something worthwhile.

I'm pretty certain it was because Liz wasn't there with me. She had never been allowed to come the few times I was allowed out.

This time, however, she would be here, but I still don't know if it was going to be worthwhile.

Guess no time like the present to figure out.

We opened the door, the music loud and the voices louder as we stepped inside and were immediately surrounded by almost half of the student body.

Most of them, mainly the girls, were dressed up while the other half were dressed normally. Thank fucking God for that. Last thing I wanted was to stand out more than I already did.

Some people said hello to us while others simply stared, glaring at us like we were completely off our fucking rockers being in there in the first place.

"Jasper," Edward stopped me, gripping my shoulder tightly. "Oh God Jazz he's here."

I looked around, following my brother's gaze until I spotted James standing around with some a few other guys from our class.

"Are you going to go say hello?" I shook off his hand, nudging him when he just stood there.

"No, no." He shook his head, his eyes wide as he stared at him. "God he is so...."

"Edward," I stopped him. "Please don't okay?"

He nodded in embarrassment. "Before the night is over, I promise."

"Sure, if you say so." I knew that it would probably take him all night to work up the courage to go and say hello to him, unless he was drunk of course. Which I'm sure liquor would be a guest in this house tonight, given if Jacob was the guy I pegged him to be.

After making sure Edward was calmed down enough, we continued our trek through the living room, trying to avoid gazes as much as possible. The last thing we needed or wanted was to cause some kind of scene, so it was best to just keep our gazes off of anyone else.

"Hey, you made it!" A hand touched my shoulder and I shook out of their grasp before even turning around. I knew who it was and the need to cause a scene grew as soon Jacob started talking.

"I'm glad you both showed up." He kept his attention mostly towards Edward, knowing if I thought he was so much as looking at me too long I was going to say something.

As much as I wanted to say that I didn't hate him, I knew that there was a part of me that genuinely hated this asshole for the mere fact that he got to do all these things with Liz. I didn't give a shit if they were real or not, he still got to them with her.

And that shit did not sit well with me at all.

"Yea, well, we didn't have much of a choice." I shrugged, looking around the room as if there was actually something worthwhile to look for.

After a few minutes I saw her.

"Oh, fuck me." I cursed under my breath, but it caught the attention of both Jacob and Edward. Edward just shook his head while Jacob was glancing between me and the two girls who were walking down the stairs.

Though the second girl might as well not even existed as soon as I caught sight of Liz.

She was everything, and she was definitely fucking worthwhile.

While she looked a little out of place here among all these people who hardly talked to us, it didn't away from the fact that she looked fucking beautiful.

She was absolute perfection and it took all I had to just stand there and wait for her to come to Jacob, not me.

"You guys are here," Her smile was genuine as she hugged Edward first followed by me. She held me tightly, but I knew I couldn't do the same. That would send up some red fucking flags if I even so much as held her a second too long.

I knew how the game worked. Liz might not, but I did. She could, more of less, show affection to Edward and I and no one would really think twice about it.

However if that affection was reciprocated, people would start asking questions and questions were things we couldn't afford in our family.

"Fuck Liz you look gorgeous." Jacob took the words right out of my mouth, but he had the right to say those things to her. She was his girl.

_His girl_, fuck that was painful to even just think about it.

He was telling the truth though. Even though I'm sure I was biased, she truly looked amazing. Her dress looked even better on her then it did the day before.

Her hair was curled and half of it was pinned up while the rest fell freely behind her. She had make-up on, just enough to make a difference but not too much were she looked like a girl who was trying too hard.

What got me the most was the light swipe of gloss she had on her lips, drawing me in even closer more than usual. That added to the fact that she biting her bottom lip out of nervousness was enough to shatter all my fucking reserve.

"Well now that my beautiful girl is with me, you guys enjoy yourselves. Peyton?" Jacob turned to talk to the girl who, up until this point, I had forgotten was even standing there. "Be good."

The girl, Peyton, waved her hand at Jacob as if she didn't care about what he had to say but there was something in her eyes that said otherwise.

The way she watched as he and Liz walked away was sending up red flags as well. I didn't know much about this girl, other the fact that she and Jacob knew each other from before moving here and that her father ran in the same circle as mine and Jacob's.

"So, I don't think we've been properly introduced and being as both Jacob and his little girlfriend are only seeing each other right now I might as well do it myself." She stepped up closer to us, her eyes dancing with excitement and intrigue.

"I'm Peyton," She stuck her hand out to Edward first. "I'm an old friend of Jacob's. And you are…"

"Edward," He shook her hand quickly, looking over at me in confusion. "I'm Liz's brother."

"Ah," She pursed her lips, but I doubt this information was new to her. "Well it's very nice to meet you Edward." She drawled his name in what was a rather seductive tone, but neither of us mentioned the fact that her charms weren't going to work on Edward.

I think after a moment or two she saw that he wasn't too interested in her and turned her attention towards me. It was slightly uncomfortable to say the least, for this girl who had some kind of connection with Jacob to be showing so much interest in the two of is.

I didn't fucking like it one bit. It was bad enough that Jacob was slowly earning Liz's trust, but I wasn't sure we could handle yet another person, especially someone like this Peyton girl.

"What about you, what's your name?" She turned fully towards me, eyes locking straight with mine.

Deciding it'd be best to just get this over with I offered her my hand, which she eagerly took, and shook it quickly. "I'm Jasper. I'm Liz's other brother."

"Well can I just say that she is one lucky bitch," She dropped my hand, shaking her head slightly. "You boys are incredibly good looking."

Something about her statement rubbed me the wrong way and I couldn't hold my tongue. "And that makes my sister lucky how?"

She shrugged, looking around the room with a rather bored expression. "I was just making an observation. I'm an only child and I'd kill to have two, strong and sexy as hell brothers be my protectors. Which, I can tell you're very protective of that girl."

"She has a name." It was becoming clear that Peyton was no fan of Liz. Perhaps she and Jacob used to date or some shit. "And of course we'd protect our sister, from _everything_." I glanced at her and for someone reason felt compelled to protect Liz from this girl as well.

"Well good," She didn't seem bothered by my gaze. "Because she looks awfully fragile, like Jake could crush her if he, you know, lost control with her."

_Lost Control_? What the fuck was that supposed to mean? She was making him sound like some sort of animal who was stalking my sister.

It wasn't that far-fetched of a thought the more I thought about it. I had seen more and more the way he would look at Liz and it was evident that his feelings were no longer platonic.

He desired her, craved to be with her in the most intimate of ways I'm sure about it.

Well he could keep on dreaming if that was the case.

"Liz is strong," I blurted, my words flowing before my brain could filter them. "You don't know anything about her or any of us for that matter."

"Look," She stepped closer, poking a manicured finger against my chest. "I don't need you treating me like some vile bitch. I am anything but. You say you're looking out for your sister? Well I'm looking out for Jake. I know how he gets and from the looks of things he's way in over his head with that girl."

She had a point, just not the one I'm sure she was looking for.

I backed away from her, crossing my arms across my chest. "Oh, and tell me, what in god's name would you need to protect him for? My sister would never hurt anyone, especially Jacob."

I hated saying the words, but I knew it was true. Liz _did _care about Jacob. Whether or nor her feelings extended beyond friendship where beyond me, but she cared in her own way.

Peyton merely snickered and waved her hand at me. "Whatever man, don't get all pissed off because someone's talking shit about your sister. She's a nice girl I'll give her that, but she isn't what Jacob needs."

Smirking I nodded my head. "You can fucking say that again."

She lifted a perfectly arched eyebrow before bursting into hysterics. "Wow, we agree on something! Ah," She patted my cheek. "I think we're going to get along great."

As much as I didn't want to, everything this girl did made me draw comparisons between her and Liz and it was becoming very evident that Peyton and Liz were polar opposites when it came to perhaps everything.

While this girl was an extrovert and had no problem calling people out on their shit and what she really thought about them, Liz was quiet, reserved and would rather suffer alone than hurt someone she cared about.

"Well anyways," She dropped her hand and scanned the room again, eyes briefly landing on Liz and Jacob before turning back to me. "What's up with your brother? He seems a little out of it." She nodded her head to Edward who in fact was looking a little dazed as he stood there.

I knew that our business wasn't any of hers, but it didn't stop me. "He's interested in someone, but is too scared to say anything to them."

Her eyes widened as she followed Edward's gaze, her lips twisting up into a sly grin when she saw just who he was staring at. "Ah, no wonder he didn't want to give me the time of day. Well, at least he has good taste." She laughed. "I'll be right back."

Before I could ask her what the hell she was doing she off, sauntering right over to where the object of Edward's desire was standing. She tapped him on the shoulder, hugged him and the two of them stood there and talked as if they were old friends.

"What…what is she doing?" Edward looked at me, looking rather pale. "Does she know him?"

I shrugged. "I doubt it, unless she and James have some sort of past too."

After another moment or so the two of them turned and headed towards Edward and I.

"Shit, shit….Jazz what do I do?" I punched Edward in the arm, shaking my head at him.

"Calm the fuck down and talk to him?" It seemed simple enough. "No one's going to hurt you here tonight Edward, just fucking live it up man."

He swallowed thickly, running a hand through his unruly hair just as James and Peyton reached us. I watched as both Edward and James eyed each other, the attraction to each other so undeniably obvious that I didn't know whether to laugh or smack some fucking sense into them.

"I was hoping you'd be here." James spoke first, his eyes locked with my brother's. "Which, why wouldn't you be, your sister is dating Jacob so it should've been pretty obvious that you would be here."

Oh were you were fucking kidding me? Both these guys turned into rambling messes around the other?

"Yes, well we have to keep an eye on our little sister of course."

"Well," He stepped closer and placed his hand on Edward's arm. "Do you think you can take a break and come spend some time with me?"

Edward, after, gawking for a split second nodded his head quickly and, in a rather un-Edward fashion, wrapped an arm around James shoulder as the two of them walked away.

"Well that was….fuck, thank you." I knew if it wasn't for Peyton, those two would've probably been eye-fucking each other all night without either of them having the courage to talk.

"It was nothing. At least someone here can hang out with the one they want." She mumbled, shaking her head when she realized I heard her.

After Edward left off with James, Peyton and I somehow ended up standing there for the following two hours beside each other. Guys would come up to her, but she just blew them off. I did the same with the few girls who came to ask me to dance with them.

We were standing there together and it was both awkward and comfortable at the same time. I don't know where there was a sliver of comfort with her, but I honestly didn't have the strength to question.

I couldn't, not when my eyes were constantly drifting over towards Liz and Jacob. I could tell Peyton was doing the same thing, but neither of us said anything about it.

I'm sure it looked rather odd, my gaze on my sister every so often. For all she knew Liz and I were actually related and my constant staring may have risen some suspicions.

But dear God I fucking hoped not. She seemed to be too much in her own little world to even really notice.

About ninety percent of the people at the party had been drinking nonstop just like how I figured and, after seeing Jacob trail his finger down Liz's back, I decided to join in.

Peyton and I somehow found our way to over where one of the guys was supplying alcohol to everyone that walked by. I didn't even know what he handed me, but I downed it in one take.

"Shit, man, here take another one." The guy, who I believe his name Paul, handed me another one. "Enjoying the night?"

I snickered. "Fuck no."

"Ah well, drink up and I'm sure it'll turn into a good one. There are plenty of sexy ass girls here." He grinned, casting a glance over at Peyton, who was busy taking shots by herself.

"Yes, we'll see about that." I handed him the empty plastic cup. "I need another one."

I normally didn't drink like this. In fact I normally didn't drink at all, but tonight I felt like I was going to be in dire need of alcohol in my system to get through the night.

If getting through it would even be a possibility.

I downed three drinks in ten minutes, the warmth of the liquor burning my throat and blurring my thoughts.

So much so that I wasn't even aware that Liz was standing beside me until she placed her hand on my arm.

"Are you having fun?" She all but whispered and I snapped out of it long enough to look at her. Fuck even in my buzzed state she was sexy as hell.

I shrugged and didn't even blink twice when she took the cup out my hand and hesitantly drank from it. Her nose wrinkled in distaste for a moment and I watched as she swallowed, feeling an odd desire to fuck her because of that simple movement.

I wrapped an arm around her shoulder and pulled her into my side, burying my face in her hair. "Fuck you smell good." I groaned, wanting nothing more to take her out of here where I could show her just exactly what she was doing to me.

"You're drunk aren't you?" She tried to pull away a little, but I didn't let her.

"Drunk or not, I know what I want." I knew that my words and actions were bound to cause a scene, but I couldn't find it in me to stop.

It was then that I realized that I wasn't the only one who smelt like tequila.

"Are _you _drunk?" I felt a surge of anger rise in my body, my grip finally loosening around her.

"It…it was an accident." She looked away from me, a blush staining her cheeks. "But it tasted sort of good."

"Liz what the fuck," I pulled away from her completely, staring down at her. "What do you mean it was an accident? You don't accidently get drunk!"

Her eyes narrowed. "Don't talk to me like that Jasper. It was an honest mistake, but why shouldn't I drink? It's not like I do things like this all the time? Why can _I _get a night to just…be a normal teenager?"

I shook my head, my mind clear enough to process what she had just said.

"Getting wasted isn't going to make you feel normal Liz. If anything, it'll just an excuse for Jacob to take fucking advantage of you. Is that what you want?"

I was beyond angry and I wasn't sure why. I knew that there was no reason to be angry with her.

Liz would never do something stupid like have sex with her fucking fake boyfriend. Jacob on the other hand, I could only imagine the things he wanted to do with Liz whilst she was inebriated. And Liz would give in because she didn't know any better.

Fuck this was bad.

She glared at me, stepping closer and jabbed a finger against my chest. "Do _not _talk to me like that Jasper." She was pissed, that was much was certain. There was a fire in her eyes that fueled my desire for her. "Why you would say something like that? You know Jake would never hurt me."

That fucking did it. Brushing her hand off me, I placed my hands on her cheeks and glared at her. "Why are you defending him? You honestly think he won't try and fuck you the second he sees you're wasted?"

Her lips twisted. "And you? You aren't any better. Get your hands off of me." She backed away from me, stumbling a bit as she did so. I, by instinct to protect her, wrapped an arm around her waist so she wouldn't fall on her ass and pulled her back to me tightly.

"You know I'd never take advantage of you little girl. You know you'd want it."

My words were slightly slurred, but I was still able to hear her gasp loud and clear.

"Let me go Jasper." She whimpered.

The sound of her voice, her sweet voice strained with pain, caused me to drop my hands quickly and step away from her, guilt and anger swelling in my chest.

Before I could say anything I felt a hand on my shoulder, Liz and I turning to see who it was.

"Come on babe," Peyton reached down and grabbed my hand. "Dance with me?"

"I don't fucking dance."

"I don't really give a shit," She slurred slightly. "Now, come with me before I drag your ass out there myself." There was a quiet desperation in her eyes, something I'm sure she saw reflected in my own. Though my desperation was fueled by anger, the desire to seriously fucking hurt someone right now.

I reluctantly nodded, allowing her to slowly drag me away from Liz and towards the part of the room where everyone else was dancing. As Peyton slipped her arms around my shoulder, I caught sight of Liz staring at me with a look that could only be described as rejection.

And it felt fucking good. I pulled Peyton closer to me, wrapping my arms around her waist and pulling her closer to me, all the while watching Liz.

As she continued watching me I saw her taking another drink, downing it quickly as she kept her eyes on me.

"Jasper," I felt my face being turned away from Liz, meeting Peyton's gaze. "Are you okay?"

I glanced once more over at Liz, this time spotting Jacob walking towards her and wrapping his arms around her when reached her, kissing her lips quickly.

"I'm fine," I grabbed her tighter, her hips automatically rolling in synch to the music against mine. She let out a gentle hum of contentment, but there was something in her eyes that told me she wasn't happy at all.

She wound her hands in my hair, pulling my face down closer to hers so that her lips hovered above my ear. "Fucking liar, just let go….I can make you feel good."

I didn't want to let go, I _couldn't _let go. Even though I was slightly wasted I was still very aware of the situation at hand. If Liz and I's comments didn't cause enough of a scene, then God only knows what people would think if they saw me completely lose it of something my sister did with her boyfriend.

"Mother fucker," I heard Peyton hiss and for a second thought her anger was directed towards me, but when I looked at her I saw that she wasn't even looking at me anymore. I followed her gaze and once again found myself staring at the train wreck that was Liz and Jacob.

He had his arms wrapped around her waist, smiling down at Liz who was flaying her hands about in an animated fashion as she spoke to him.

Their eyes were only on each other, completely oblivious to everyone around them.

And yet here we were, dancing with each other but clearly unable to avert our gazes from the people we obviously wanted to be with more than anything else.

Talk about fucking ironic.

I needed to get my mind off Liz and fast. Looking down at Peyton, I saw the same want in her eyes.

Guess I'd have to make do with what I had.

Pulling her even tighter against me, I grumbled in her ear with a slurred voice. "Make me fucking forget."

She smiled, almost ruefully, and nodded.

Game

Set

Fucking match

**Jacob**

The entire night was turning out to be rather interesting to say the least. I had Liz by me the whole time, except for the ten or fifteen minutes I left to go check on something.

When I came back, however, it seemed as though all hell had broken loose between Liz, Jasper and Peyton.

I couldn't put my finger on it, but when I saw Liz shooting daggers and Jasper and Peyton, who were out dancing, I couldn't figure it out.

Sure Peyton loved to have some fun, but why would that make Liz so angry? I knew she wanted to protect them, but it seemed to be going a little bit too far.

Hell she even looked _jealous _of what she was doing.

"Babe," I turned her to face me. "Is everything alright?"

She blinked at me a few times, shaking her head before smiling softly. "I'm good Jake. I…I think I want to dance." She took my hand and laced it with hers.

Dancing seemed like an alright idea to me, especially if it was with her.

"Oh Jake," she turned herself around as she started dancing right where we were standing. "I'm having so much fun!"

Though she was with me she seemed to be off in her own little world.

"Come on Jake!" She grabbed my arm and wrapped it around her waist. "Dance!"

She didn't have to ask me twice. Turning her in my grasp I wanted to see her as we danced. I don't know what it was, but there was something about Liz that captivated me.

Even though this was a fake relationship, I couldn't help but let myself believe that at this moment we were a real couple. Especially when she started swaying her hips a little bit closer to me, my arms going to wrap around her waist. I stopped though when I noticed that she was holding something in her hand.

"What is that?" I nodded towards the plastic cup in her hand.

"Oh this?" She laughed "I don't know, you're friend gave it to me…I think." She was still moving those hips and my eyes were all but fixated on them.

"My friend huh?" Peering over her I saw Paul staring right back at me, a sly grin on his face. I knew he'd be the culprit! Asshole!

"I think I should take that." I tried to take it from her, but she wouldn't let me.

"No Jake," she pouted "it's mine!" God she was adorable.

Adorably drunk.

"Please babe?" I wrapped an arm around her, pulling her tiny frame closer to me. "Can I have some?"

She watched me for a second, her free hand coming up to pat my cheek after a few seconds. "You look like a puppy!" She giggled.

God, the things this girl did to me without even knowing it. That giggle had to be the cutest, yet sexiest thing I had ever heard.

Either that or I was more smashed than I thought.

"Liz please, just give me the drink. You're already drunk, and I'm pretty sure you'll regret this in the morning."

"I'm not," she leaned back away from me bit "drunk. I promise!"

"Well can I just have some then?" She pursed her lips for a moment, but still didn't let up. Needing to know, I took it out of hand quickly. Though she tried to protest I downed the rest of the drink quickly.

"Oh Jesus Christ," I sighed, the taste of tequila burning my throat. She was _so _wasted.

She had accidently had some liquor earlier, but she had somehow gotten her hands on some more during the time I was away from her. It didn't make any sense. As far as I knew Liz didn't even drink. I wondered why she was having the sudden change of heart.

"Jakeee…" she drawled my name out "that's not fair! That was mine."

"I know babe," I set the cup on the table beside us. "But what do you say we just dance for right now. Would that be okay?"

She pouted, trapping her bottom lip between her teeth and I had to fight back the urge to kiss her. "Fine, let's dance."

We didn't make it that far however. With my arms still around her waist, we were suddenly approached by a few of my friends that I hadn't had the chance to talk to yet. So Liz, being the intoxicated girlfriend she was right now, clung to my side as we talked for awhile.

The entire time though I could see her stealing glances at the couples out dancing. At one point I heard her mumble something under her breath before tensing beside me. I wanted to ask her what was wrong, but I knew she wouldn't answer me or would just tell me she was fine.

Once my friends left, Liz seemed to look tired and a hell of lot tired.

I suggested we go sit on the couch, to which she eagerly accepted.

But not before she grabbed another drink on the way. I sat down and waited for her, knowing there was really no way I could stop her. I didn't want her to start throwing fucking punches at me for saying the wrong thing.

"Jake," She slurred her words as she stumbled into my lap and I wasn't sure I could resist.

"Um, Liz I think you're a little drunker than you think you are." I lifted her out of my lap, knowing that if she stayed there she'd soon be feeling the effect she was having on me.

"Jakie, I'm not that drunk. I just…feel good. Let's go dance!" Her energy level seemed to pick back up as well as her mood. I was having a bit of a hard time keeping up with her.

"I'll be right there babe." She was already gone though, back out where the rest of the people were. I made my way into the kitchen to take a minute or two to get my head back on straight.

"She's drunk, Jake. You're drunk. Do _not _do something you'll regret later." Though she was far more wasted than I was, I was still a bit tipsy and wasn't sure if I'd be able to keep my hands off of her completely. We had only been together for a few months, but it felt so much longer.

I was hooked on this girl and she didn't even know it.

Why would she? This was just supposed to be something fake and short term. Well hell, it was feeling real to me. I went over the fridge and searched for something I could give her.

Thankfully, there were always water bottles in there. Grabbing one, I headed back in hopes that she'd drink it. She had too much alcohol in her system and it was going to catch up to her at any moment.

"Jake!!" She screamed my name when she saw me come into view. "You're friend is soo nice Jake! Look," she pointed to yet another cup in her hand "he brought me another yummy drink!"

I glared over at Paul. He was enjoying every second of this, I knew he was. As funny as she was acting, I was getting far much more concerned about her health. I doubt she had drunk before tonight and she was going way overboard, especially with the kind of drinks Paul made.

"Here, I think you should drink this." I attempted to give her water, but she just wrinkled her nose in distaste.

"Ew Jake I don't want that." She shook her head, bringing the cup to her lips and downing everything in there. She handed it to Paul and smiled sweetly. "Thanks Paul, you really are one hell of a guy!"

"Anytime babe," He laughed, walking off to be with our other friends. I was going to kill him later.

"Liz, how much did you drink?"

"Um…I'm not sure. Like…five or six? I lost count." She stepped closer back to me, wrapping her arms around my neck. "Dance with me?" She didn't give me much of a choice, she was already moving dangerously close to me. My hands gently gripped her hips and turned her around, pulling her back to my chest. She sighed, her entire body moving to the music.

I didn't even know what song was playing or if anyone else was in the room because the second she reached her arm back and wrapped it around me all I saw and heard was her.

My lips were way too close to her and I couldn't resist it this time. I leaned down a little bit lower and pressed my lips to the side of her neck. Much to my surprised, she pushed herself back tighter against me.

God we were so drunk and this was so fucking wrong.

I shouldn't be taking advantage of her like this. I knew that she didn't think of me, didn't like me in that way. This was all alcohol, making her act like this.

I went to move away from her, but she was hanging on tightly to me. "No Jake, do it again." She whispered.

God, what was I going to do now? The alcohol taking over yet again, I moved my lips a bit lower and kissed her collarbone softly. One arm snaked around her waist, holding her in place against me while the other reached up and placed it over hers. Still dancing, she rotated her hips against me gently and I bit down on my lip to stifle the groan building in my chest. Shit, I was so turned on right now. Every little thing she was doing was driving me crazy.

_She's drunk Jake. _ That tiny voice was reason was suddenly back and thank god for that.

I turned her around, still touching her and looked down at her. Her head was tilted and her breathing a bit erratic. She was staring at me, biting her lip with what looked like lust and desire in her eyes. I knew I was seeing things and she wasn't thinking at all.

"Jakee…" She slurred my name, her body still swaying.

She was testing me here wasn't she?

"I…we should…what?" She rambled looking up at me again.

"Come on," I took her hand and led her back over to the couch. She was coming down from her buzz and it'll only be a matter of time before she got sick or passed out.

Looking around I tried to spot her brothers, but I didn't have any luck. When the hell did he leave?

And then it hit me.

Though I was pretty sure who Edward had left with, it was only now dawning on me where the fuck Jasper had gone.

Looking around again I saw no sign of Peyton and ran a hand over my face in frustration. I knew how Peyton operated and I didn't want her doing something she was going to regret in the morning. I knew she and Jasper were drunk as well and them leaving together would somehow explain Liz's reaction earlier. God only knows where they went to, but I had a pretty good guess.

I knew then that I had two choices. I could take her back home in her drunken state, or I could let her stay here with me.

Her snuggling into my side allowed the selfish tendencies to take over and I decided on the second choice. There was nothing wrong with that, right? I just wanted to make sure she was safe and comfortable. At least here, I'd be able to see that she was okay.

I sat with her on the couch for a good twenty minutes, letting her ramble on about God only knows what. In that time span, everyone started to leave, patting me on the back and wishing me a happy birthday as they left.

Before I knew it, it was just Liz and I. I knew my parents wouldn't be back until sometime tomorrow afternoon so that would give me a chance to clean up everything before they got back. Not that they would mind, I just didn't want to leave all this shit lying around.

"I'm really glad you came tonight Liz." I ran my hand down her arm. "I know that we aren't really dating, but I really think that I'm starting to like you more than I probably should and I…." A slight noise coming from her stopped me and I when I looked down I saw that she was completely passed out.

Well, at least she passed out and didn't get sick. Guess girl could hold her alcohol. I stood first before picking her up carefully. She didn't wake up as I climbed the stairs and entered my room. I set her on the bed and went to grab her an old t-shirt should sleep in. By the time I turned back around, she was curled up on her side and fast asleep.

I couldn't let her sleep in her costume though. That would seem a bit uncomfortable.

That and I was a selfish fucker sometimes.

Like an idiot I didn't bother turning on the light so I had to do it in the dark. Sitting her up, I clumsily slipped the pair of boxers up her legs. I had to push her dress a bit and even though I knew I shouldn't, I stopped when I noticed the white lace boy shorts she was wearing.

_Focus Jake, focus. Oh god she looks sexy in those things. Focus!_

I finally got those on her before moving up to unclasp the top of her dress. Once it was off her shoulders, I grabbed the fabric in one hand while pulling her against my body as I lifted it off of her.

Holding her to me, I could feel the matching fabric of her bra rubbing against me. Oh Jesus fucking Christ.

_I wonder what all of her would feel like…no, you can't think that! _

Not looking down at her I slipped the t-shirt over her head as quickly as I could. All the while though, I licked my lips as I thought about what Liz would taste like. Especially in her white lingerie, she seemed so pure and innocent.

It was such a turn on and I wasn't sure why. As I adjusted the shirt, something caught my eye.

On her side, there seemed to be something there, something that sort of looked like a bruise. I wondered where she got it from because it looked pretty nasty.

Liz didn't strike me as the kind of person who ran into things a lot.

Whatever the cause of that bruise was, it wasn't sitting well with me. Something told me that wasn't something normal and that I should look more into it. Though, I was still a bit tipsy and tired as hell.

That and it was still my birthday and I wanted nothing more than to curl up with this beautiful girl. I scooted her body up closer so she could rest her head on the pillows. I quickly discarded my jeans and shirt and got into the bed with her. She stirred a bit in her sleep, rolling over and lazily throwing her arm across me.

I basked in the feel of her. Knowing she was dressed in my clothes allowed me to think that this was all real. And when she curled in closer to me, her face nuzzling my chest, I allowed myself that fantasy. Just for tonight.

All thoughts faded to the background as I began to drift off, Liz's scent the only thing filling my senses.

I held her closer to me, burying my face in her hair. "Night angel," I kissed the top of her head softly.

Now _this _was the way to end one's birthday.

I only hoped she wouldn't freak out on me in the morning, but I pushed that idea to the back of my mind as I finally allowed myself to fall into a deep and peaceful sleep.

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**Jealousy, anger & being intoxicated aren't exactly the best combination are they? **

**I hope you guys liked this one! Let me know my lovely readers. **


	18. All I Have

**AN: Wow, I know it's been like forever and a day it seems since I've updated this story and I am so sorry. **

**Thank you for everyone who is sticking with me. For my girls, I still adore you for helping with this story!**

**And now onto the chapter! Enjoy!**

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**Chapter 18: All I have**

_**I was missing you  
You were miles away  
He was close to me  
I let him stay  
Then I closed my eyes  
He almost felt the same  
But when the morning broke  
I cried out your name**_

_****_

If I'd only known  
It would break us  
I'd have done anything just to save us

_**'Cause you're all I have  
When the world comes down on me  
You're the one I love  
And I'm begging you to see  
**_

**Liz**

Waking up the next morning was far more difficult that I thought it would be. Funny thing because I had no idea why it was so hard to open my eyes. Something so simple and yet it took me forever to achieve my goal.

I was warm and I didn't want to move. Shifting a bit to get more comfortable, my leg brushed against someone else's. Not think much of it, I snuggled deeper into them. Figuring I had fallen asleep in Jasper's room, I had no intention to leave his embrace any time soon. Especially when I felt his arm drape around my back and pull me in closer. God, he was so warm! Warm and oddly stronger than usual.

Moving again, my hand came to rest on his stomach. Again, I was surprised to find that he was shirtless. Jasper didn't do that normally. Maybe he had gotten hot in the middle of the night? There was a bit of a soft groan coming from somewhere when I kept my hand on his stomach and I fought back the urge to laugh.

"Liz?" I heard my name, but the voice did _not _match Jaspers. Finding the will then to open my eyes I did so, immediately sitting up when I saw that it wasn't Jasper I had just been clinging on to. No, I had been making myself quite comfortable with Jake.

That was a really stupid thing to do because the second I sat up, my head started throbbing horribly. I cringed, shutting my eyes and trying to take deep breaths. What in the world was going on here?

"Liz? Babe look at me." Opening my eyes, Jake was sitting up too and looking at me with a hint of amusement in his eyes. I didn't see what was so funny.

I shook my head frantically, refusing to face what I wasn't exactly prepared to think about right now.

With a warm smile, I watched Jake lean in closer to me, his fingers brushing some of my hair back from my face, tucking a few strands behind my ear.

"Babe," He lifted my face with his free hand. "It's just me."

Yes, I was fully aware of who I was sharing a bed with.

It was what happened in this bed that had my stomach twisted in knots.

"I…I don't remember it." I whimpered, feeling my eyes swelling with tears.

With a tilt of his head, it took him a good minute or two to get to the same level as I was on.

"Liz," His voice dropped slightly. "Oh baby, nothing happened last night between you and me if that's what you're thinking."

"But," I gestured between him and me, the state and lack of our clothing. "How did I end up here? Why am I still here in the first place?"

He shrugged. "Your brothers left last night, and you were completely wasted. You passed out in my arms on the couch. You…do you remember any of that?"

I chewed on my lower lip, running thru last nights' events trying to remember when in God's name I started drinking.

And then it hit me.

The dancing

Jasper

Tequila

Jasper and Peyton

Jake and I

"Oh God," I buried my face in my hands, my cheeks flush with embarrassment. "Jake I've never drank before."

A light laugh caused me to look back up at him, my brow furrowed in confusion.

"What's so funny?" I glared over at him, crossing my arms over my chest.

"I know last night was your first encounter with alcohol, babe. To be honest I'm glad you were here with me for _that_ first, I'd hate to think of someone taking advantage of you in your drunken state."

I nodded softly, Jasper's voice floating thru my mind as I thought back to what he had said last night. It was one of the few things that I actually remembered. Him accusing me, accusing Jake of wanting to do things with me just because I was drunk.

But I had been right. I knew Jake would never do something like that.

He, above anything else, was a true friend.

In fact, other than my brothers, I would consider him my best friend.

Without thinking I leaned over and flung my arms around Jake, burying my face in his neck. "Thank you so much, Jake. You don't know how much I appreciate everything you've done for me."

His arms encircled my waist, pulling me into his lap as he held me tightly while placing a kiss on my forehead. "No problem, sweetheart. I would do anything to keep you safe."

My stomach tightened at his words as I felt the sincerity behind them, my grip on him growing tighter.

After a few minutes of sitting this way I felt him shift slightly in the bed until I could feel him standing up with me in his arms.

"Where are we going?" I raised an eyebrow at him, my hands clasped behind his neck as he exited the room.

"Downstairs of course," He grinned playfully at me.

"But Jake what about your parents? I…I don't want them to think badly of me dressed like this?" I glanced down at what I was wearing; a too big t-shirt that reached right above my knees.

"Not that they ever would, but they won't be home until tomorrow Liz. So you're good." He held me closer to him as he made his way downstairs, thru the living room before finally setting me on my feet in the kitchen.

I shivered some as my feet hit the cool tile, before brushing some of my hair back and making my way towards where I figured the pots and pans were.

Just as I reached where I needed to be, I felt an arm wrap around my waist and pulling me back.

"What do you think you're doing?" I felt Jake's breath against my ear and I turned slowly in his grasp.

"I'm going to make you breakfast?" I thought it was obvious.

He just shook his head. "Nope you get a day off. Go sit, I will cook for you."

"But I…"

He pressed a finger to my lips. "I can handle this, baby."

I nodded softly, smiling as I untangled from his grasp and took a seat on the counter while I watched.

**Jake**

This morning's events with Liz were both entertaining and bittersweet. I knew that if this were all real I would've have been doing way more with her right now than just making her some pancakes, but I knew where the boundaries laid for us and I wasn't about to risk screwing things up just because I couldn't control my hormones.

Even though I told her I would do it, she kept on insisting to help me the entire time. It wasn't until I told her that she was going to have to wait for me in the dining room that she finally got the hint and just sat back and watched me, her eyes darting around the entire time.

She seemed more relaxed this morning, more at ease than I had really ever seen. We made idle chat, me asking her if she was feeling anything that would resemble a hangover, but she was surprisingly feeling fine. We talked about school, which was completely boring to me, but she enjoyed to seem to actually enjoy it so I let get go on about God only knows what.

There was a carefree nature to Liz when she spoke about things that she was passionate about and I couldn't help but get wrapped up in all she had to saw.

Apparently I got caught up too much because I ended up burning the last few pancakes.

"Fuck," I groaned, trying to clean up some of the mess.

Liz hopped off the counter, grabbing the two plates with the edible pancakes and made her way to the table. "It's okay Jake, every great chef burns a good pancake now and then." She giggled softly and waved me over.

Grabbing everything else we needed I joined her after a minute, sitting across from her with a slight smirk on my face. "Have you ever burned anything?"

With a soft smile she shook her head, glancing up at me. "But I've been cooking since I was a little girl so I've had a lot of practice. I wasn't always a good cook I swear!" She grinned, cutting into her food, eating it sort of slowly.

I shook my head at her, the two of us soon falling into another random conversation. We talked about everything from my house, to flowers to even cars.

I was beginning to notice that Liz was a bit ADD when it came to things, her mind jumping from topic to topic in a blink of an eye. When I mentioned that to her she just laughed and agreed completely, stating it was something she had gotten from her mother.

"I get bored easily." She laughed softly, her gaze focused on something out back.

"Like right now?" I followed her gaze, rolling my eyes as I spotted when I saw what she was looking at. "You're ignoring me for _them_?" I didn't give her the opportunity to answer, instead heading outside quickly, grabbing one of the little fuckers and bringing them back inside.

"Never thought I was going to have to compete with one of these," With a playful smirk I set down the few month old puppy in her lap, leaning against the table and awaited her reaction.

There was a few seconds of silence before a quiet giggle filled the room.

"Jake!" She grinned, her eyes wide like a little girl on Christmas morning. "Why didn't you tell me you had puppies!" She snuggled the dog in her arms, placing a kiss on the top of his head. "Oh my God he is adorable!"

"Yea, I guess so." I kneeled down beside Liz and the puppy, running my hand over its head, earning me a tiny bark.

"You never had a puppy?" I asked after a few more minutes of observing Liz interact with it, like it was a little child.

Her features softened, shaking her head softly as she whispered. "We weren't allowed to have any pets growing up. Our father said we were too irresponsible to care for flowers, let alone an animal."

Though it seemed like a typical reasoning, there was something off in the way she spoke of it. A lot of kids grew up without any pets, but Liz seemed actually pained when she talked about it. So either she really loved animals, or there had to be something more to it.

Something that seemed to be so close to the surface, something that wasn't sitting too well with me and I wanted to know the answer to.

"Liz, babe, can I ask you something?" I glanced up at her, my hand resting over hers.

She nodded softly, glancing around the room.

But before I could open my mouth again, she was up out of her seat, handing me the puppy. "Oh god, I didn't realize how late it was. My dad's going to kill me!" She looked frantic, already making a mad dash towards the stairs.

"Liz shh, I'm going to get you home soon enough." I gently wrapped and arm around her and led her back up the stairs. "We should get you some pants though, pretty sure your parents would flip if you showed up like this."

She nodded, allowing me to lead her into my sister's old bedroom where there were a few boxes lying around that were filled with clothes. After rummaging thru one I handed her a pair of jeans and prayed that they would fit her.

Without thought she slid the pants up her legs, buttoning them quickly before running her fingers thru her hair. "Do I look alright? Presentable at least?"

One quick glance over and I shook my head. "You look perfect. Now," I grabbed her hand in mine, lacing our fingers together. "Let's get you home shall we?"

She squeezed my hand softly and nodded. "Thanks Jake. For…everything."

After gathering all her things, we loaded up in the car and headed down towards her house.

Liz allowed me to hold her hand the entire way there, almost as if she wasn't ready to go home quite yet.

Even though she said she needed to be there, there was something in her eyes that said otherwise.

And truth be told, I wasn't ready to let her go either.

I think I was getting to the point where I wasn't ever ready to let her go.

And I wasn't sure if that was a good or bad thing.

Guess time would tell.

**Liz**

The ride home was comfortable and silent, the only noise was the quiet humming of the radio every so often.

We reached my driveway all too soon as far as I was concerned, but I knew that with each passing moment I was getting closer and closer to reaching that boiling point.

I knew that father was bound to snap at any moment, but I wasn't sure how bad it would be.

My silent prayer went unanswered.

As soon as I rang the doorbell and I heard the voices on the other side I froze, my grip tightening around Jake's tenfold.

"Babe what's wrong?" He stood in front of the door, looking down at me concerned.

"I…" I was at a loss for words. I couldn't tell him what was going through my mind at that very moment. "Um, everything's fine Jake." I dropped my hand from his just as the door opened behind him.

"Eliza," father's voice was cold as he peered over Jake's shoulder, his eyes locking with mine. I felt myself shaking tremendously, but hoped that it wasn't too noticeable. "I'm glad to see you made it home young lady."

Before I could even attempt to explain myself, Jake turned around and began talking my father without so much as blinking an eye in hesitation.

"I apologize for Liz not coming home last night Sir. I figured it would be best if she stayed with me where I knew she would be safe. She fell asleep there and I didn't want to wake her up."

"Safe?" He scoffed then looked at me more closely and I tugged on the hem of my t-shirt subconsciously. "Young lady are you hung-over?"

I bit my lip, knowing my answer wouldn't be wrong regardless.

His lips tightened. "Get in the house Eliza, _now_." He quietly hissed and I practically pushed Jake out of the way.

"No wait," Jake grabbed my hand gently. "In her defense sir, it wasn't her fault. She didn't know about the alcohol. I take full responsibility and I just wanted to make sure she was okay last night. I hope you understand that."

I stared between father and Jacob, hoping that by some miracle that father would understand what Jake was trying to tell him.

There was no miracle.

"I do understand son and I'm very thankful that you took care of my daughter when she wasn't capable of taking care of herself. Thank you." He threw in a smile and that seemed to placate Jake over, make it seem as though he was being sincere.

"Alright, well, I'll see you tomorrow Liz." He squeezed me hand, kissed my cheek and was gone before I could quietly plead for him to stay for a second longer.

I made my way into the house quickly, dropping my bags on the bottom of the staircase and made my way into the dining room where I knew my mother would be.

Much to my surprise Edward and Jasper were in there as well, the three of them looking rather relieved to see me.

"Sweetie," My mother was up on her feet and embraced me tightly. "Are you alright sweetheart?" She ran a hand through my hair, kissing my cheek when she pulled away.

I nodded, my head still throbbing a little bit. "I'm sorry if I worried you."

"You know I put up with a lot of your shit Eliza," I jumped back, turning on my heel slightly to look at father who was staring at me. "But being fucking hung-over is unacceptable in this house. Now, I've already talked to your brothers about their mistakes from last night, so now it's your turn."

I gasped softly, quickly looking over at Jasper and Edward. I knew father 'talking' to them meant something way worse than that. Edward was slumped slightly in his chair and his breathing was a bit shallow while Jasper was sitting there, eyes cold, and a bit of dry blood on the corner of his lips.

I felt my heart sink.

I hadn't been there to protect them.

"I'm sorry father. Really, I am."

"And you think that excuses your behavior?" He stepped closer, hand shooting out to grip my arm tightly. "You think that a stupid drunk girl is what the boy wants? You really think your behavior is going to make him like you more? Answer me!" He raised his voice.

"No…no I'm sorry. It won't happen again I promise."

"I don't want your fucking promises Eliza!" He gripped my arm tighter, his fingers digging deeper into my skin. "What I want is for my daughter to take some responsibility and stop acting so stupid all the time. I'm tired of picking up after all three of you and I swear to God if you don't all clean up your act…."

"I will!" I whimpered, my cutting him off causing him to twist my arm tightly. A sharp pain shot from my arm to the rest of my body and I felt my knees giving out from under me and I dropped to the carpet below.

I bit my lip, blinking back the surge of tears threatening to spill down my face. "I'm sorry father. I promise this will never happen again. I swear I'll make sure none of us make the mistake again.

He snickered, releasing my arm with a shove. "You're so pathetic Eliza. What makes you think you'd be able to defend your brothers? You're nothing but a weak, foolish little girl who knows _nothing._" His words cut deep, but I'd rather endure this than the physical abuse.

"Yes, I know." I whispered, knowing if I didn't agree he'd only strike me again.

"Like I said, you're weak." He spat, turning to walk away from me. "I mean what I said Eliza. One more fucking mistake like this…." He trailed off, grabbing his things and calling mother, yelling something about them being back later and how the house needed to be taken care of.

As soon as they were gone, Edward was done on the ground beside me, gently wrapping his arms around me and pulling me close. "I'm sorry sweetie." He kissed the top of my head.

I wrapped my good arm around him and shook my head. "No need to be sorry Edward. I'm the one who screwed up last night by drinking and then by staying with Jake. I should've been thinking of you boys and not just myself."

"Nonsense, we're all the blame here. We all were drinking. We shouldn't have left you there." He pulled away and helped me stand up slowly.

"She wanted to be there Edward." Jasper's voice, his emotionless voice, startled me and I stared at him. "She wanted to be there with _him_."

He stood from the table, not even bothering to look at me as he began to walk by me.

"Hey," I grabbed his hand to stop him. "What are you talking about?"

"You feel safe with him, Liz." He glared at me, anger in his eyes. "You want him to take care of you, to be the one that loves you. You want him to be the one that touches you and makes you feel good."

"Excuse me?" I dropped his hand and stepped in closer to him. "How can you say those things to me? You're the one who went off with that girl you don't even know."

I half wanted to know what he had done with her, but I knew it'd only cause me some kind of heartache.

"What I do shouldn't be of any concern to you Liz." His words stabbed my heart and I felt the air rushing out of my lungs. "It's pretty plain to see who you want more."

What was he saying? "Why are you trying to hurt me?" I whispered.

"I'm not hurting you if it's the truth." I could hear the pain in his own voice for a second before he disappeared away from me, going upstairs without even so much as looking back at me. I watched him until he was gone, tuning back to Edward with a completely broken heart.

"Oh God," I felt like I was going to be sick, Edward wrapping a steady arm around me when he noticed me about to fall down. "What have I done?" I asked more so to myself than to him.

"He's just upset right with himself right now Liz, he'll come around." I listened as my brother tried to soothe me, but it only fueled my sadness even further.

"Why?" I choked out. "What did he do? Tell me Edward….please, I need to know."

I wasn't sure if he knew what I was asking him, his eyes searching my face for an answer.

"Did he have sex with her?" The mere thought made my heart clench with absolute dejection. If he did, was it my fault? Had I sent him into another girl's arms because of this fake relationship I was in with Jake?

Jake and I didn't do anything, but Jasper didn't know that as his words from last night hit me harder.

"I don't know." He answered in what I hoped was an honest answer. Edward had never lied to me before. "He only came home about an hour ago. I…I don't know where he was Liz, he didn't tell me anything."

"You were here last night alone?" I stared at him surprised. Edward didn't like being alone.

"Uh," He blushed and looked away from me. "No, I wasn't alone."

I pushed back the dull throbbing in my chest, gently lifting my brother's face so I could see him better. "What happened sweetie?"

Biting his lip, his eyes suddenly lit up. "James stayed here last night."

"He _what_," I brought my other hand up and cupped his face in my hands. "Run that by me again."

"But I swear we didn't do anything!" He blushed deeper. "He didn't even come upstairs. We just talked. Oh God Liz we talked all night. It was wonderful." The smile grew wider on his face and I felt tears stinging my eyes.

"Oh baby I'm so happy for you," I cried, wrapping my arms around his neck. "You deserve some happiness Edward, more than anyone."

"He kissed me." He whispered in my ear. "And I mean he_ kissed _me."

I knew I didn't have much experience with kissing people, but the way Edward said it was so innocent and carefree that I couldn't stop the laugh that escaped even if I wanted to.

He looked at me, raising a brow in confusion before he joined in with a soft laugh of his own.

"I'm glad Edward, I really am." I wiped my cheeks with the back of my hand.

"Jasper will come around Liz, I know he will." He nodded his head, completely confident in his statement. "He just thinks….well, you know."

"But I didn't!" I waved my hands about. "I swear Edward you know I'd never do something like that. Besides you know Jake would never take advantage of me. He, regardless of everything, is my friend."

He nodded. "I know honey, but Jasper doesn't. All he sees is someone moving in on the girl who's supposed to belong to him."

"I _do _belong to him," I felt my voice drop, despair filling my heart. "He's the one I want, not anyone else."

Taking a deep breath he placed his hands on his arms. "Then I think you know what to do Liz."

The weight of his words came crashing down on me, my mind screaming on and my heart begging for a yes.

I was torn, that was much was certain.

After a minute I nodded my head slowly, my mind still behind my heart.

"Will it even matter?" I questioned, hoping he'd have the answer I wanted.

"I think if you don't do this now…you'll lose him for good."

That wasn't an option.

My mind was set after Edward's statement.

I would probably get hurt physically because of this, but I'd take all that pain any day if it meant being with him.

What had seemed like such a foolproof plan before had now turned into something that only shattered what little ounce of happiness I had.

I would _not _lose Jasper over this.

After all he was all I had.

I just hope I wasn't too late in realizing this.

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**I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and I sincerely promise not to have you waiting so long for the next one. **

**Lots going on, let me know what you thought my loves! **


	19. The Resistance

**MAJOR author's note: I hate to be the one to admit this, but I had completely lost interest in this story. Not so much in the fact that I stopped loving my characters and their journey, but the simple fact that I was highly uninspired for..well, you can see how long it's been. I, however, have taken the time to plan out the remaining chapters of this story and I now know exactly where we are headed and how this will all end up. **

**Enough of my rambling, enjoy dolls! **

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**Chapter 19: The Resistance**

**Is our secret safe tonight?****  
****And are we out of sight?****  
****Or will our world come tumbling down?****  
****Will they find our hiding place?****  
****Is this our last embrace?****  
****Or will the walls start caving in?**

**Liz**

The remainder of the day passed in almost complete and utter silence. Everyone besides Edward and myself stayed in their separate rooms. We only all were all in the same room during dinner and even then it was both quiet as well as awkward.

Father was still upset at me for not coming home the night before and I just knew that he was convinced that Jake and I had spent the entire night having sex, which that thought never even crossed my mind the entire time I was with him.

Granted I _was_ inebriated for a good part of the night, I know that Jake was a good guy and would never take advantage of me that way.

He may or may not be a lot of things, but abusing power didn't seem like one of them.

Even though I appreciated everything he had done for me, I knew that I couldn't back down on my plan that had come to me in the middle of the night when all I could think about was that look on Jasper's face.

He had to be one of the very few people who I just couldn't stand to hurt.

So, as much as I cared about Jake, hurting him would be nothing in comparison to the hurt I could only imagine Jasper was going through.

I was on nerves end all morning at school, barely registering any of the information we were being told.

If my brothers noticed anything odd about the way I was acting they sure didn't reflect it. Then again, the only thing Edward was worried about was James and their kiss and Jasper was virtually ignoring me.

Sitting on the edge of my seat during the period before lunch, my eyes were all but fixated on the clock, the minutes passing by painfully slow. I knew myself and I knew that the longer I waited the bigger chance of backing out grew.

But as soon as the bell sounded, I was up and out my seat muttering something to Edward about having to do something. Quickly walking down the hallway I made my way into the cafeteria before most of the students got there.

Eyes landing on the table where Jake always sat, I saw he wasn't there. The one day I needed him to be on time, he wasn't there. The only people I made out as I walked closer were a few of his friends.

Friends who still weren't exactly fond of me.

Taking a deep breath, I walked over to them, my eyes warily meeting theirs. "Have any of you seen Jacob by any chance?"

They shook their heads, practically ignoring me. I hated that they treated me like this. Only when I was with Jake were they nice to me.

"Well do you know where is?" I needed to talk to him desperately and his friends weren't helping me one bit, and I felt my cheeks flushing as I grew frustrated with this group of jerks.

I didn't have time for their antics.

"Please, can you just…" My mouth closed the second I felt arms around my waist. The sense of warmth was undeniable and I felt myself leaning into the embrace.

There was no denying the fact that there was something comforting about being around Jake, no matter how wrong this all was, there was no fighting the feeling.

"Your girl was looking for you." Paul nodded at me before turning back to the table of guys.

I didn't know why, but when he called me Jacob's 'girl,' I felt myself tensing. God this situation was so wrong.

"Babe," He turned me around in his arms "what's wrong?" His brown eyes were filled with so much concern that I couldn't bring myself to say the words, especially not in front of his friends. "Are you feeling okay?"

"I need to talk to you." My words were rushed, but he heard them clearly. "Outside?"

If this was going to happen, it wasn't going to be right here. He nodded, draping an arm around my shoulders as we headed towards the door. Behind me I could hear his friends laughing and saying something about a 'quick fix' outside. God, is that all those boys thought about?

That was the _last _thing on my mind.

"Liz, what's going on?" He could see the affliction written all over my face no doubt, his question coming out hesitantly as we stood outside.

"I can't do this anymore." I blurted. "I'm sorry Jake, but I just can't." No matter how badly father insisted that I be with him, I couldn't anymore.

"What happened?" He didn't falter at my words, but instead had concern still shining in his eyes. "Did something happen? Are you okay?"

I couldn't very well tell him what happened, the fight that Jasper and I had after Jacob left the house yesterday.

I hadn't exactly through my lie so I said the first thing that came to me.

"I can't pretend anymore, it's not fair to you." That was only partially true.

In all honestly, it was killing me more that Jasper was hurt by something that I did.

For a few minutes he didn't say anything and I was feeling my patience wear thin. I knew I wasn't the arguing type so the longer he stayed silent, the more worried I grew.

"Will you please say something?" I finally mustered enough courage to glance up at him to meet his gaze.

This time he didn't hesitate. "I don't think so Liz." His voice was determined, but his eyes were soft.

"We're a team, I'm not just going to stop being with you."

I blinked a few times, completely confused by his words. "It's not fair…"

He stopped me, placing a finger against my lips. "Nothing in life's fair Liz, but we have a damn good thing going. Why would you want to end it now?"

I couldn't think of a good enough reason that would please him.

He nodded. "I'm not letting you break up with me just for the hell of it, or because you don't think this is fair." His words struck something inside of me and I found myself caving almost instantly, sighing softly against his fingertips.

He simply chuckled, wrapping his arms around me. "Didn't think I was that stubborn did you?"

Snickering softly as we made our way back I leaned into his side. "Guess I underestimated you." I really could think of much else to say as we walked, my body quickly beginning to feel as if it was giving out on me.

The bell had already rung as we reached the cafeteria so we just kept walking among the student body.

I was beyond exhausted by the time we made it to our final class.

Jasper said nothing to me when I sat beside him and for once I wished I had been sitting beside Jake instead. I was feeling chills and his almost constant state of warmth was something I craved at the moment.

Our professor lectured as usual, but thankfully there was no lab. Instead she gave us the final fifteen minutes to be social. Which that would've been great had my partner been talking to me.

I was vaguely aware as to what Jasper what was doing as I lay my head on top of my folded arms. I had dealt with fatigue for years now, but this was more than that. I could barely keep my eyes open.

My lids grew heavier with each passing moment that by the time the bell sounded I was all but fast asleep. Jasper gently nudged me in the ribs, a low hiss passing my lips when he did so.

We silently walked down the hall where we met Edward, gathered our things, and headed out to the car.

I was barely aware of Jake as he came to give me a quick kiss on the cheek, murmuring something about calling me later.

I nodded slightly and watched him walk away as I got into the car. Jasper drove home like always, Edward occasionally looking back at me with a concerned look on his face. As much as I tried to smile at him to calm his worry I knew I had failed miserably.

My eyes drifted to the road as we drove, my mind nowhere in particular it seemed. There was so much to think about that I didn't even know where to start even if I wanted to.

It wasn't until we pulled up into the driveway and saw father's car that I snapped back into reality. My immediate thought was that something had happened and that all three of us were going to pay for whatever misfortune had occurred.

We quickly made our way into the house where we found father on the phone and mother flitting around the living room in a haste.

We all knew better than to question anything so we all stood off in the corner and waited.

Father was off the phone a few moments later, his gaze immediately falling on me.

"Eliza," He moved closer to me and I felt a twinge of nervousness "I expect the house to be spotless when I return with my favorite meal on the table as well."

My eyes narrowed in confusion. "Return from where, father?"

He scoffed, his fingers wrapping around my upper arm and squeezing tightly. "Perhaps if you paid attention to your surroundings you would know the answer to your own damn question."

I glanced around the room, but apparently took too long to piece it all together because soon enough father was snapping all of us back to look at him.

"I'm off to New York for business, gone until Saturday."

I bit back the smile the wanted to break through my serious reserve, instead nodding slowly and pretending as if I was actually sad that he was leaving.

"I expect all three of you to behave am I understood? I will not have the three of you fucking around while I'm gone."

We all nodded quickly to placate him as he released my arm, returning to snap his brief case shut just as mother finished up with his suitcase.

He didn't bother to look in our direction again or even say goodbye to us, barely kissing our mother on his way out.

We all stood in silence as the car started up and pulled out of the driveway a moment later. As soon as we knew we were in the clear it was if this huge wave of tranquility washed over us.

"Oh my darlings," Mother was quickly enveloping the three of us in a group hug "we can breathe easy for a few days."

We all returned her sentiments, no one speaking the obvious question that lingered in the back of our minds.

Leaving while father was away wouldn't get us very far. He controlled everything and would know our every move through all the connections he held. He would find us and drag us right back to this place.

We were his possessions, nothing more nothing less.

"Eliza, sweetheart, you're burning up."The attention was quickly turned towards me. I shrugged softly feeling my eyelids grow heavy.

"I am a little sleepy, but it's fine."

My mother shook her head. "You need to go lie down babygirl. Don't worry about dinner or anything. You need rest and you need it now." She motioned me towards the stairs.

"Edward can you please make sure your sister gets in bed and Jasper honey will you help me in making dinner?" I smiled as I heard my mother's sweet voice, Edward wrapping his arm around my shoulders a moment later.

"Come on Liz." I was rather glad that Edward was going to stay with me. It would only be awkward with Jasper and I at this very moment. Though I could tell he was worried about me. I mustered a small smile before heading upstairs to my room.

Once we finally reached my safe haven I quickly stripped out of my jeans and jacket, not even thinking twice that Edward was in the room with me. It was almost second nature; there was nothing to be embarrassed about in my opinion.

With father gone I, without hesitation, grabbed a pair of sweats from my drawer and slipped them on. About to reach for a t-shirt, I felt Edward's hand on my shoulder as he slipped his own hoodie around me.

I blushed softly. He really did know me better than I gave him credit for. Ever since we were young I loved falling asleep in his sweatshirts, they brought me a sort of comfort.

No words were needed as I climbed into bed, Edward soon right beside me so I could rest my head on his chest while snuggling up under the blankets.

The last thought that crossed my mind before succumbing to the welcoming slumber was that, for the first time in almost a year, we would be able to breathe easy for a few days.

We all needed it.

Desperately

**Jacob**

I knew the second I didn't see Liz the next day at school that something was up. She was perfect student so for her to not be here was a big deal.

I tried to keep my thoughts at bay, but I couldn't help but think about our conversation from yesterday. She had seemed so adamant about wanting to end us and now she wasn't here, it made me think that she had been trying to protect me.

Or there was the other thought floating around my mind, the one that she was sick or had gotten into a car accident; that though my stomach clench every time I thought about it. I needed to see one of her brothers before I fainted from all this damn anxiety.

Thankfully I didn't have to wait long. I caught sight of Edward as he was walking into his Spanish class and I felt a surge of relief wash over me. If Liz had been really hurt by something he wouldn't have been here.

I quickly approached him, knowing there were only a few minutes before the class would begin.

Thankfully Edward seemed to know exactly what I was looking for, his lips curving into a smile when he saw me.

"Liz is fine, Jacob." Placing a hand on my shoulder, he chuckled softly. "She's home sick, but she's a trooper and will be back on her feet in no time."

"Thank fuck," I sighed in relief and he nodded.

"Hey, if you'd like, you should stop by and say hello to her after school lets out. She's happy when she's with you."

After another moment of talking I told Edward that I'd stop by later to check on Liz.

Seeing her was the only thing my mind for the rest of the day that soon as the final bell rung I high tailed it out of there and headed straight to the local floral shop that was by my house, knowing that the flowers there were some of the best in the city.

I stalled sometime, not wanting to show up before her brothers got there, but I couldn't exactly wait all that long to get to her.

Approaching their house I all but jumped out the car, taking the steps quickly until I reached the front door before ringing the doorbell.

I heard someone unlocking the door and I held my breath, hoping it wasn't Jasper on the other side. He had made it very clear that he didn't like me what so ever and I wasn't about to get on his bad side more than I already was.

Much to my relief it was Edward who opened the door. He smiled when saw me, but like always there was something lurking beneath that smile. He always seemed to be on nerves end, but I didn't understand why.

"She'll be very happy to see you, Jacob." Edward stood aside and allowed me in.

"It's popular today here I see." I raised a brow as I took in Edward's guest in the living room, giving them both a smile before heading up the stairs.

I hadn't been up there since that afternoon she played the guitar and I pretty much attacked her.

Her door was closed and I could hear her coughing before I even walked in.

Soon as I opened the door, her gaze lifted to meet mine as her eyes widened in surprise.

"Jake," she coughed out my name as I closed the door "what are you doing here?"

I shrugged with a charming grin. "What kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn't come see my sick girlfriend?"

"But…I'm sick Jake. I don't want you getting sick."

I shook my head, walking closer to her bed. "I have a strong immune system. I don't even remember the last time I got sick."

She smirked. "I'm such a mess right now." She glanced down at her clothing and attempted to fix her hair.

"You're sick. You get a free pass." Though, she didn't look like the mess she claimed to be. She had on a green sweatshirt that was falling off her shoulders on one side, a white tank top underneath and a pair of black sweats. Her hair was down, flowing all around her.

"I brought you these." I suddenly remembered the flowers in my hand and gave them to her. Her eyes widened when she saw them, bringing them close so she could smell them. When she did she sneezed, but still had a smile on her face.

"Jake, how did you know that lilies are my favorite?"

I shrugged. "A little bird told me."

She laughed gently. "Edward?"

I nodded. "Jake they're beautiful, thank you so much. No…no one's ever bought me flowers before."

"Really?" That seemed impossible. "Every girl deserves flowers."

A sad smile spread across her face. "Who'd buy me flowers?"

I made a mental note to surprise her with flowers every now and again. It'd work to our benefit, me buying the girlfriend flowers. She'd love it too.

"So how are you feeling?"

"Horrible. I should be fine in a few days though."

"Have you eaten anything today?" She shook her head. "Do you want me to make you something?"

"Oh no, my mother will be here in a few hours. I'll eat then. Thank you though."

"You sure? It wouldn't be any trouble."

"No!" She coughed when she raised her voice. "I mean….I'm fine Jake. You don't have to cook anything for me."

"Alright, if you say so. Well, what were you doing before I came barging in?"

"Um, I was just doing some reading." I looked around and saw that she didn't have a TV or anything in the room. Which that sucked, especially since it looked like she wasn't capable of going downstairs or anything.

I wrinkled my nose. "Reading? Well it's a good thing I showed up then. That sounds ridiculously boring."

"To you maybe, but I love reading." She defended herself, setting her flowers on the nightstand. "I don't have much energy to do much else anyways."

She did look really tired, but I didn't want to leave her. Thinking quickly, I kicked my shoes off and climbed in on the other side of her bed. She watched me with curious and nervous eyes as I scooted closer to her.

I hadn't asked her, I just jumped right in to her bed, but she wasn't saying anything so I figured it was all right. Besides, it's not like this was the first time we had been in the same bed. Granted, she was passed out last time but still.

"Come on." I extended my arm out towards her.

"Come on what?" She fiddled with the sleeves of her sweatshirt.

"Just come here Liz, I'm not going to hurt you." I laughed, but she didn't. If anything, she looked a bit concerned by that comment.

She bit her lip and, after a minute or so, she hesitantly moved in closer to me. I wrapped my arm around her tiny frame and pulled her close. I was always surprised how tiny she was when she was beside me.

When I brought her closer, her sweatshirt fell further down her shoulder, revealing more skin. With my free hand, I reached over and ran my fingertip over her collarbone that was suddenly exposed. Her skin was overly warm, no doubt from the fever she had, but I couldn't help myself. I leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to the delicate skin there. She gasped gently, but she didn't pull away.

"You smell good." I shut my eyes, snickering at how foolish I sounded.

"Thanks?" She laughed lightly. "It's just lotion."

No, it was a hell of lot more than that. It was _her _scent.

It was the same scent I smelled every day that we sat together.

After I allowed myself that self indulgent moment and completely making a fool of myself, I let her get comfortable in my embrace so she could get some rest.

As she rested her head on my chest, I rubbed her back softly. I remember my mom doing that for me as a kid when I was sick so I figured it would help her feel better.

She didn't fall asleep right away though. She tried to stay away and talk to me.

"Did your father leave this morning too?" Her voice was soft, sleep already invading her body.

"Yea, said he was meeting your dad at the airport." I was slightly grateful that Liz's father was gone. She seemed more at ease in this very moment, even though she was sick.

She nodded. "I'm so happy he'll be gone this weekend."

"Why's that?"

She tensed, shaking her head. "Um, well father doesn't really like it when we're sick."

"Why? It's not your fault when you get sick."

She laughed somewhat coldly. "Well, my father was in the military. He still abides by those rules, likes things to be in order."

"Oh. Well, I guess that makes sense." It didn't really, but Liz's father looked like the kind of man who'd say something like that. "Well hopefully you're feeling better by Monday."

"Yea, me too. I'm sorry Jake," she yawned "I don't think I can stay awake anymore."

"It's alright babe." I resumed rubbing her back. "Rest, I'll stay here until your mom comes home and then I'll go home. Don't worry about me, I'm perfectly fine here."

"Thanks Jake, I really appreciate you coming over." She pulled her legs up closer, curling in tighter to me.

Before I knew it, she was snoring softly against me. The heat of her skin was passing through to mine and she was coughing occasionally, but it didn't really bother me.

I sat with her in that exact same position for almost two hours until her mother eventually came home. She was a bit surprised to see me in Liz's bedroom when she opened the door, but she just smiled and walked in.

"How long has she been sleeping?" She reached over the bed and pressed her hand to Liz's forehead, frowning when she felt she still had a fever. "Jacob, sweetie, it's really kind of you to be here, but I'd hate for you to get sick."

"It's okay I have a really good immune system. One little cold isn't going to get to me."

She laughed at my apparent stubbornness. "Thank you for staying with her."

"It's nothing. I don't mind taking care of her."

"I'm very glad to hear that." Her voice took a sad tone for a moment. "Well, would you like to stay for dinner honey? I was going to fix something up really quick."

"Yea, I'll stay. Do you need any help?"

"Oh no, I'll get Edward or Jasper to help me. I'll come get you when it's ready."

I nodded and she left the room. I heard her calling Edward and soon the two of them were making their way downstairs to start cooking. I wondered where Jasper was. He had to know I was here right? My guess was that he was avoiding me. Which that was fine, but he should've at least come in to check on his sister. He was always being so damn protective of her. Well, where the hell was he now?

It was a good forty five minutes later that someone came back up to the room. Slowing opening the door, Edward walked in a few seconds later. "Dinner's ready."

I moved gently, trying to wake Liz up. Already a deep sleeper, she seemed to be in an even deeper sleep when she was sick.

"Here, let me help you." He crossed the room and kneeled on the bed. "Liz," he ran the back of his hand across her cheek, "you need to wake up sweetie." She stirred, but didn't do much else. Again he moved his hand, shaking her shoulder softly. "Come on, Jake's here and you need to eat something."

"I don't want to." She swatted her brother's hand away, curling up tighter against me.

Edward just laughed. "I could always tickle you Liz, but you're liable to have a coughing attack."

"Edward, shut up." Her voice was muffled as she pressed her lips against my shoulder. "Go away."

"No, get up." I couldn't help but laugh at the interaction between the two of them. It was clear these two very extremely close. From what Liz had told me, she and Edward had this twin vibe going on even though they weren't actually related.

After a few more minutes, she eventually opened her eyes and slowly rolled over to glare at Edward. "Happy now?"

"Yes, now let's get a move on Liz." He patted her hair down a bit before leaving the room.

"He's pretty relentless isn't he?"

She groaned as she sat up in the bed. "You have no idea." It took her a few minutes, but she eventually stood up and made her way to the bathroom. I waited for her, knowing she'd probably need my help.

Emerging a few minutes later, she had her hair all pulled back and was walking rather slowly.

"Do you need me to carry you downstairs?"

"No, I can do it." When I shot her a look, she waved her hand at me. "Honestly Jake, I can handle walking down the stairs."

"Suit yourself."

I quickly came to see that Liz was a rather stubborn girl herself. She made it down the stairs alright, it just took her forever. She was out of breath when she finally made it down to the living room, but it was the look on her face when she took in her surroundings that garnered the most attention from me.

"C'mon sleeping beauty, let's get you to the table."

**Liz**

As if having Jake wanting to carry me down the stairs wasn't interesting enough, the sight that greeted me when I finally made it to the dining room overshadowed all of that.

My brows furrowed as Edward and James, my mother trailing behind them, came out to set the table.

Edward threw me a cheesy smile, nervously running his fingers thru his hair as he hugged me tightly. "Stop staring, Liz." He laughed softly before returning back to James.

My gaze fell back to my mother who was either blissfully unaware of the looks her son and James were stealing, or she didn't mind it one bit.

I wanted to ask her, but I knew that right now would be completely inappropriate and I didn't want to bring up a subject if she hadn't even been aware of it.

"There you are darling." My mother embraced me before motioning for me to sit down. "Your brother and James have been helping me cook this afternoon."

"How sweet of them," Grinning softly I took a seat, Jake sitting down beside me with a soft chuckle passing his lips.

"James I am so glad you could join us for dinner tonight. It's not very often that we have guests. Not only you, but Jacob as well." my mother's voice was sweet as she spoke and I felt Jake squeeze my leg gently under the table. I blushed casting my eyes over to Edward and James, a half lit smile gracing my lips. My brother deserved happiness and if just for tonight, I wanted him to have it.

"There's plenty to go around, please everyone enjoy." my mother motioned for us to dig in, the boys eagerly praising the food. Still sick I didn't have much of an appetite, but between the knowing gaze from jasper and the sweet words from Jake, I ate half a plate of spaghetti and salad.

The table fell into comfortable conversation, mostly between my mother Edward and James. Jasper spoke very little and there was part of me that wanted to sit beside him and hug him tightly. Though things still were slightly awkward between us, the feelings and emotions hadn't changed; at least for me.

Soon the chat died down and, after clearing the table, mother informed us that she was heading out to a friend's house. It was something she hadn't done in forever and she, like the rest of us, was going to savor our moments of freedom. A kiss on the cheek and a hug goodbye, she was gone.

Much to my surprise Jake didn't stay that much longer, saying there was some sport meeting he had to attend. I didn't argue, I was exhausted.

"If you need me, call me ok?" Gently cupping my face he placed a kiss on my lips before pulling away. There was the slightest trace of wariness as he walked away and it worried me somewhat.

After he left I opted to just head out to the backyard for some fresh air. On my way I caught sight of Edward and James heading towards the stairs, a smile gracing my lips.

It was windy, the cool air whooshing by as I crossed the yard to the bench under the oak. Thou still sick, the cold felt wonderful against my heated skin. It was out here that I was able to just breathe freely. So much had been going on that I hadn't really had a true moment to myself.

At this very second in time I felt lost. I knew that no matter what I did, the abuse wasn't going to stop. Yes, it had lessened somewhat, but it was still there. It killed me that I couldn't protect my brothers, a burden I bad been carrying for years.

And then there was Jake and jasper. It wasn't that that there was a competition towards the two. No matter how amazing Jake was, I knew were my heart lay. Perhaps it was twisted, but I was certain that my love for jasper went deeper than just the fact that he had always been my protector. To me he wasn't my Sibling, but rather the keeper of my heart.

The realization struck me harder than I realized, the fluttering of my heart causing me to both smile and bite back tears. I was now certain of my feelings, but what about jasper? After everything, every time I hurt him, was he going to react like I hoped.

There was no time like the present. As I stood, a loud roar of thunder and flash of lightening illuminated the yard, a sudden downpour of rain washing over me. A flurry of giggles passed my lips, running back into the house and straight up the stairs towards jaspers room, flinging it open.

He immediately snapped his head up, eyes taking me in as i stood in his doorway dripping wet.

Pushing back every ounce of fear and apprehension, the words passed my lips as i walked closer. "i love you"

Jasper's eyes widened as i spoke taking a moment before getting off the bed and walking towards me. "Liz.." he seemed just as uncertain as i was.

"Please believe me. Its you, jasper. You have my heart, it's yours to take. I am yours to take...in every way."

Jasper stopped right in front of me, his blue eyes searching mine with an intense gaze. The seconds pass and with each one that went by i felt my hope dwindle.

"Please say something." my voice wavered, but he stopped me by pressing a finger to my lips, reaching behind me to slam his door shut. I jumped just as he pulled me by my hips, crashing his lips to mine in a heated kiss. I immediately groaned softly, my hands coming to tangle in his unruly locks, holding his face to mine.

The kiss was filled with reckless abandon, teeth nipping and tongues fighting for dominance. I was blissfully unaware of jasper pushing me back towards his bed until i hit the edge and fell back softly.

Trailing his kisses across my jaw and neck, i couldn't stop my body from arching into his touch, craving more.

I wanted to be his in everyway, the desire to have him claim me both emotionally and physically was almost too much.

As if reading my mind, jasper's lips soon hovered against my own, his whispered words sending a chill down my back.

"I am yours, let me make you mine."

My breath hitched in my throat, cupping his face in my hands before kissing him roughly, my silent gesture of agreement

There was no turning back now.

* * *

**What a whirlwind! It feels so good to be back! thoughts, please? **

**I love you all!**


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